My 2 Year Old Son Is Rotten!!

Hello,
I am a wife of an active duty soldier. I know what you mean about the hbusband beiong gone all the time. Mine works 12- 16 hrs days. He also works 6 days a week.
Have you tried taking his fav. toys away and privelages? My daughter will throw her fit but I don't give in. Have you tried putting him for a nap when he acts bad? What about a day with out any T.V. or shows? My daughter started having chores early. Like cleaning her room as best as she can, and small things like that. I also started a star chart. When she is good and does what she is told she gets a star. I made it to where it is seperated by the day. I also hung it up where she can see it to remind her but yet high enough she can't touch it. After so many stars they get a prize.

Hello,
You are probably in a spot where it is difficult to get out of the house. Your son might just be bored and want your attention.
I have a 3.5 year old and I am 25 weeks pregnant. I live here in Morgan Hill, so if you want to get out of the house, call me and let me know. The boys can play at the park. I have a schedule of things to do so we don't get too bored. My husband works a lot too.

Good luck.
N.
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K.,
i only have one daughter who will almost be two but i seemed to keep her in check. 2 is the big year of exploration. Alot of the times they are jsut trying to see and explore what they can do, cannot do etc. and in the mean time they are trying your patience. I would say that you would have to be very consistent as well as very firm. Do not let the little one get away with anything (especially something that could jeopardize the well being of your baby). At times a 2 year old does not quite understand why or why not they cannot do something. Take some time out to explain.. Also remember that your little boy was an only child (your anyway) for awhile before the new baby came into the picture. You need to set aside some quality time for just you and him so that he wont feel left out. Hope this helps. If you have any questions or need any help or someone to talk ____@____.com

I've got a two year old and a newborn too. My newborn is 3 months now, and things have been getting better as my toddler adjusts to the new reality. My two year old's bad behavior peaked at about 9 weeks after his brother was born. So... it will probably get better. Hope that is encouraging.

I'll be honest: I spanked more. I normally don't. But when there was a discipline issue that had to do with the newborns safety (hitting the baby, for example) I skipped the time outs and went straight to the big guns. Sure, it had to be repeated a few times, but it sunk in pretty quickly. Besides, when you are busy with the little one, who's got time to make sure the older one stays in the naughty chair?? I'm not proud of increasing spankings... BUT it worked. And I haven't had to go there in weeks now--which is really nice.

Good luck.

I love the title you chose!!! I have been saying the same thing about my two year old!! I have even taken him to doctors and therapist thinking he was ADD or ADHD. Nope either of those. The only thing I can tell you from spending alot of time and money, is that he is just seeing how far you are willing to go. He is testing his personal limits and boundaries. Just keep up the consistency and firmness. And most importantly, be sure your husband backs you up when he is around. Any two year old will sense and see that you two are divided; therefore telling and showing him that the limits and boundaries move. In any case, good luck to you!! What has started working with me was putting him in a preschool. He is around other kids who have to follow the same rules. You can ask about their rules and discipline rules and continue them at home. You will get a break but the discipline will continue even with you not there!! Or, we can start a play group at my house!!

I know how frustrating it is.. I have a 5 yr old daughter that has become mouthy.. I also have a newborn to take care of too and it can be very exhausting dealing with one that doesnt make things easier... Maybe hes jealous of the new baby? Does he help out with her? I like to try and get my daughter involved with my lil one.. like hold her bottle for her.. or get me the diapers..

Hello K. I'm C. a mother of two (19 and 16) young gentlemen and by no means an expert on any subject. Just a sympathetic neighbor perhaps been through some things you may have yet to face in life. First off, Thank you and your family for the sacrifices made in your husbands service for our Country. I'm wondering if your son is acting out in order to get some of your undivided attention? Seems like he's suddenly had to share you with hubby, step siblings, and a new sister that belongs to both parents. You've probably already thought of this but I would suggest setting aside an hour or so of time with his name on it while baby is napping. Literally call this time "(his name) Hour" and give him your undivided attention. Also, be sure to include him in caring for the baby and hubby by getting diapers, and whatever tasks he's capable of assisting you with. Keep in mind K. that you ARE his world right now. His care giver, best or only friend and play mate for the next few years before pre-school. I hope this helped in some way and wish you and yours the very best.
C.

Wow. Your situation sounds like mine. My son has shown defiance all his life. As the years go by he becomes worst. We finally found a therapist that would take us seriously and is helping us with his behaviors. The only thing I can recommend is consistency. Be consistent on your discipline. When he asks you for another minute on the time out chair don't pay attention. He wants to see you fly off the handle. Not only is he entering the terrible twos but he has a new sister to compete against for attention. It might help to set aside some attention time for just your son. But the key for defiant children is consistency. If you let up just once, they will remember that forever. I speak from experience.

Hi. My name is Ali. I have an 18 month old boy. He has recently developed a very bad violent streak. He is so bad sometimes I just set him in his crib, and go outside, because I feel like if I stay in with him, I'm going to swat him or something. Maybe what your boy needs is interaction time with kids his age. I notice sometimes that there are days that all I've said all day long to Mike is "No..." and "Stop..." and "Don't". If he has someone to play with he doesn't acumulate all that aggression from me. We should set up a playdate. I have very few mom friends, and I always love to meet new mom's with boy's my son's age.

You know, I hope this doesn't sound to hard....put in a corner. Make him stand there rimrod straight and not look around. Give him 2 minutes of that and see how he likes it. He wants to tell you he likes sitting in the chair. So make him do something he doesn't like. My brothers have to do squats for five minutes. (I do NOT suggest that for such a young kid!!). I hope you have good luck with this. Best Wishes, T.

Hi K.,
My 2 year old daughter is the same way. What I started doing was taking away her favorite thing. For her it is her Dora Doll Pillow, You know those really big pillows that are shaped like the real thing... Since I have been doing that she has calmed down just alittle. Another thing that I do is put her in her chair al=nd make her sit there for a while with nothing. I know htat you said that your son tells you he needs another min. in his naughty chair, so I was think change the spot of where it is to a new place that he doesn't like to be. Let me know how it going with him Maybe we can exchange I deas about this...

D.

Hi K.,
My twins were born when my oldest was 18 months old. At 18 months old she was potty trained and a good baby.

Once the twins came home from the hospital, the change began! My 18 month old started taking off her underwear and peeing and pooping in the corner, she started taking off her sister's diapers when they were sleeping, she would push them really hard when they were in their swing, anything and everything she could do to make them cry she would.

I now know she was just wanting attention. I imagine for a baby who was getting all the attention, it was really hard to share with 2 new babies. She was no longer the baby and it was really hard for me to split my time because the twins required so much attention.

Now that they are 8,7,&7 I can look back and see what I should have done.
My advice to you is first, to make the 2 year old part of the babies life...."being big brother". Let him help with changing, bath time, feeding, play time etc. Make him feel important.
Second, make time everyday for just him. He's probably insecure and needs some extra one on one from Mom. Pick a time and a project the two of you do everyday. Let him know that is your special time together.
Third, my daughter would react to positive reinforcement a lot better. If I tried to put her in time out or if I yelled at her she seemed to thrive on it. She would do it more. If I ignored her bad behavior(within reason), but really made a big deal about the good things she did...she would get really happy and try to do more good then bad.

Good Luck...it gets better.

C.

I would say change his punishment. He obviousley does not care about time out, so try taking somthing away for a period of time. Not all kids can be punished the same way.

Well I know that feeling I was taking care of my sisters kids while I stilled lived closer to them. Get your son involved in helping to take care of your lil girl. He may resent not being the only one there. He also might feel that he isn't getting enough of your time so get your attention. he may feel he needs to get you mad and that is the only way to get your attention. Make time for him I am not saying that your not but it needs to be you and him only so when your lil one naps maybe have a snack with your son or if he wants to push your buttons start taking toys away. put them in a box where he cant get them and let him know if he straightens up he might even get it back. But dont give it back for about a week or he will be sweet for a min. just to get it back and then your back to square one. I have a 22 month old and she knows when is misbehaves she has to bring mom a toy to put in the box i have two boxes right now and she still has toys coming it could be as simple as a block. Today she just got her Dress me elmo after about 2 months. she does better now and is not that bad. she is kinda controled and the rule applys out of the house as well so that means misbehaving at the grocery store toys are coming to momma. Try that and let me know how that goes.. Ohh yea yelling doenst really work it just shows that he is under your skin.. hang in there. R.