My 1 Year Old Doesnt Sleep!

One reason she's waking up and staying up might be because she truly does not know how. It's really hard, but you should stop nursing her to sleep. Most folks recommend teaching them how to soothe themselves to sleep by 6 months... the older they get, the harder it is to break the old habit and learn new ones. Be careful to not introduce a new habit you'll want to break later (like rocking to sleep, or falling asleep with a bottle/cup). There are many books out there and I learned that none of them have the answer -- babies are too different. Get 5-6 of them and then pick out the tidbits that make sense to use for your family and your baby. How much does she nap during the day? There is a fine line between too much sleep and not enough sleep. If a child sleeps too much for naps (most babies go down to 1 long afternoon nap between 12-15 months) they won't sleep as well at night. If they doesn't get enough sleep during the day, they don't sleep at night because they are overtired and restless and can't settle down well. When my son had issues waking at night and being restless we moved his bedtime from 8:30 to 7:30 and all the 'problems' went away. My daughter hasn't had sleep issues because we just did from day one what we had learned from our son. Everything I've read says night terrors don't really begin until after age 2 but since neither of my children had them I don't really know.

Hi N.
I had the same problem with my son, what the doctors were calling night terrors I was calling hunger pains or even mommy aloneness. I would take the shirt I had worn all day or even my pillow case and lay his head on it and he would smell mommy all night long plus I fed him a little cereal before bed and it seemed to help. The cd is a great idea, we did that as well and it helps calm him down and I am somewhat of a religious person so I make sure there is a cross in each room above the doors and ask God to belss my children as they sleep through the night. Worked for me. Good Luck

I think you need to try putting your baby to bed while she is still awake, but you know she is tired. Around 8pm is probably a safe bet, when you let her fall asleep first she is becoming dependant on you to help her sleep. When you put her in bed awake, she we eventually learn to self-soothe. It's amazing too. I have done this since my little one was born, and he has been sleeping through the night since he was 6 weeks old. Sometimes I hear him wake up in the middle of the night, but he never cries. He justs lays in his bed and talks and sings. He has learned how to wind himself down to sleep. Just be very consistent. And if you do try it I will warn you it will not be easy at first, considering your child's age, but the reward will be great for both of you.

Hi N.,

I have a 7 month old son, you would think he wouldn't sleep through the night, but what I have found helpful is when I put him in his room I play a cd with very relaxing tones. I also give him a bottle with juice that I dilute with water. I know you don't want to give her a bottle, but maybe try with the sippie cup and juice. Give a cd a try. The one I have is a baby lullabye cd. Another thing you could try is keep her up maybe 2 hours later. Let her play and play until she just wears herself out. That's what we did with my 4 year old step daugther when she was that age. I'm not sure if you have tried these ideas, but it's worth a shot. Good Luck.

Jen

Do you co-sleep? Is that an option? It has its pros and cons. ;)

My son is 23 months, and he has always nursed to sleep (and coslept). He almost always cries when he wakes up - unless he is well-rested (first thing in the morning and after his nap). I really think it freaks him out when he wakes up. It's as if he doesn't like the sensation of being tired and jolted awake. There have been times when I have to wait a few minutes...holding him, continuing to offer him the breast...until he settles down, nurses, and goes back to sleep. He's never cried for hours though.

This arrangement can be hard sometimes. And there are people who veto the idea, claiming that he'll "get used to it" (well yeah, but not forever). However, my son was high-need and a poor sleeper from the beginning, and I felt that this was the way to handle it and get some sleep of my own. I know a couple of other moms in this area who nursed and coslept, and their sons nursed less and less during the night (granted, they got pregnant again, which might have helped that process) until nightweaning at three years old. Some manage to nightwean sooner.

Anyway, you might want to give that a try...maybe she will sleep better if she's near you.

i had night terrors when i was in first grade. i didn't even remember the next morning that i had one, they say you're still asleep when they happen. the doctor told my mom to turn on the tv and hold me while sitting in front of it. i think it was supposed to rouse me calmly, it's worth a try.

Why do you want to wean her? It seems like that will only make things more complicated, especially because she needs the closeness and comfort of breastfeeding at night to feel safe. Does she co-sleep with you? I would try that, there's really nothing wrong with having your baby snuggle up with you all night, and you all might sleep much better!

I agree with your doctor. My son went through a period a night terrors and it was horrible. There is nothing you can do, they aren't really awake. All you can do is check on her and make sure she can't hurt herself. Does she take a sippy during the day? I would get her a special cup for night time and put it in her crib with her, and let her know it's there if she needs it. I started my boys with apple juice, but then went to water at bed time. Sometimes now (they are 5 and 3) they still want a sippy with water to go to bed with. They usually only take a smal sip and then hold it until they fall asleep. You might just have to stop the middle of the night feeding and only offer a sippy cup. She'll cry and throw a fit, but it wont be any easier if you put it off. Expect at least 2 weeks of trouble getting used to it, and if you give in even once, it's like starting all over again. Hold her, love her, offer her the sippy. I used to stand at my sons crib and rub his back. They tend to outgrow the night terror part of it. Other ideas to help comfort her.. sleep with one of her stuff toys, let it get your scent on it, then give it to her to sleep with. My son wanted me with him, and since he's a lttle older, I gave him one of my stretched-out hair twisties, he puts it on his wrist and falls asleep with it, so he feels close to me. After a couple of times he didn't ask for it anymore. I think sometimes they just want to make sure we're there.
Be patient, changes in schedule, holidays, etc, can bring on the night terrors and need to be close to mommy, so don't be suprised if it gets better, then relapses.
Every child is differt. God Bless you <><
J.

Whoa! Whatever you do please do not follow the advice of letting your little one sleep with you. I have been a preschool teacher for about 5 years and have many 5-year-olds who still sleep with their parents. May not sound like a a big deal but do you really want to have your child share a bed with you and your hubby?

If it weren't for the night terrors I would just suggest letting her cry it out. I know it sounds cruel but it works. It is what will teach your child to soothe herself to sleep. I have a 3 month old baby and she takes 4 2-hour naps every day and sleeps through the night from 9pm-7am. It has worked for me! Good luck with whatever choice you make!

my daughter just turned one, and is still waking through the night. she also had the so called night terrors. she would wake up screaming and nothing would calm her but time. she finally stopped doing that. when she would wake up screaming the doctors told me to sit there and hold her hand or rub her back if she would let me, and talk to her in a very soft voice. i was to reassure her that every thing was fine and to tell her where she was and that mommy and daddy were both ther with her.it did help a bit. not long after i started this her night terrors stopped. hope it helps, hang in there.

I have a 13 month old as well and I started him on a sippy cup while I was still breastfeeding. He eats and drinks his sippy cup for all three meals. I just quit nursing about a week ago and I just give him his sippy cup of milk before bed, then brush his 16 TEETH (yeah i know!), then lay him down still awake in a quiet dark room. I tell him goodnight, give him a kiss, and he goes to sleep. You have to understand this is the FIRST time since he's been born that he does this and sleeps through the night!! They have to learn to soothe themselves. If they have to cry at first, then let them, if not, you'll be doing what you are doing forever and it will only get more difficult. I usually put him down at 8:30pm and now he sleeps through the night until about 8am! Good luck and I do understand, been there!