Moving 18-Month-old into Big Boy Bed?

Updated on February 26, 2009
J.R. asks from Geneva, IL
14 answers

We are expecting our second baby and I'm wondering what to do with our firstborn's sleeping arrangements when his new sibling arrives. He will be 18 months old when the baby is born. My options are to try a big boy bed at 18 months, or keep the new baby in a bassinet for a few months (making our son 21 months old by the time the baby would be in the crib) and then move him to a big boy bed at 21 months, or buy a second crib and let our son keep his crib until whenever he is ready to move on to a big boy bed. I'm really open minded.

He's a little adventurer so I would imagine it won't be long before he is trying to climb out -- which I hear is a sign that a bed might work just fine. But I still see him as my baby and at the moment I truly can't imagine him in a big boy bed.

I'm stuck. Any advice? There must be other moms out there with babies 18 months apart. I just want to do what's best for my little boy and his new sibling!

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K.U.

answers from Kalamazoo on

My kids are a little under two years apart, but my daughter was 18 months when we put her in a big girl bed. She transitioned fine. I didn't make too big deal about it, but made it exciting when I presented the option of sleeping in the big bed. Some kids are more willing to change...others not as much.
She had a couple months in the bed before her new brother got in to the crib. I think it is important that the child doesn't think that they are moving to a new bed...just because the baby is taking theirs. My son slept in a bassinet for a while, just because that was easier for me. Then I put him in the crib when night feedings weren't quite so often.

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E.S.

answers from Benton Harbor on

my kids are all roughly 2 years apart (give or take a couple months) and we went through the same thing you are going through. when i was within a couple months of having the new baby i set up the toddler bed for the older child. (i decided that since the kids were still kinda young i didn't want to go straight to a twin bed because i had the same worries of them falling out and getting hurt and all that). i left the crib up in the same room with the "big boy bed" and made a big deal about being a big brother. both the boys chose the bed over the crib and wanted to give their crib to the new baby. i put up a baby gate so that they couldn't just wander around the house, and i either had the gate set up so they could get to my room or i had a baby monitor set up. i never had a problem and it made such an easy transition to being a big brother. now my daughter is in the toddler bed and loving it! all you can do is try and see what is going to work for your kids, noone knows them better than you!

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K.S.

answers from Detroit on

Jennifer
My first two children were also 18 months apart and we went through all the same struggles. We decided to give a big girl bed a try first, before going to plan B (bassinet) or plan C (another crib). We did it two months before baby was coming to make sure the events weren't related in our daughter's mind (we didn't want her to think that baby kicked her out). We got a regular twin bed and then put the Step One side rails on each side. The first night she wasn't too sure, so Daddy stayed with her and just kept telling her it was okay until she fell asleep. After that, we never looked back, it was incredible, she loved it. We ended up doing the same thing when our third child was coming and again, no issues. I can't promise it will work for you, but I recommend giving it a try before the baby comes and then if it doesn't work, you can look at the other options.

S.S.

answers from Detroit on

With passion I say,"Don't take him out of the crib." He is too young. Even if he climbs out... tell him NO NO and put him back in the crib.

When you are dog tired with a new born you will NEED him to be in that crib. When it is 2 in the afternoon, you will need to crash on the couch and know that your toddler is safe in his bed while you catch some zzzzz yourself.

Mine are 22 months apart and I would find myself getting so upset if my oldest wouldn't nap.... because I needed that time to rest myself.

My oldest is now 3 and is still in a crib and still naps!

I have a friend who has two kids that are 11 months apart and after prematurely putting them in toddler beds (as young toddlers) sleep was much more difficult for everyone. She went out and bought a second crib and put them both back in cribs. They are all sleeping much better now.

I have posted more about this transition on my blog if you are interested.

www.shapinglittlesouls.blogspot.com

Good luck! Be wise! THink ahead.

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L.O.

answers from Detroit on

buy a second crib.

My kids are 18 months apart.. I put the new baby in my bed for 6 months but then moved him into his own crib.

My 3 year old is still in a crib.. she does not want a big bed...she likes the safety and comfort of her little crib bed.

at 18 months or even 21 months your son is too young to be allowedd to explore without supervision.. Keep him in his crib as long as you can.. even if you have to buy a crib tent to keep him in. he can get into a lot of mischief if he gets out of his bed and you dont happen to notice right away..

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D.K.

answers from Detroit on

I wouldn't do it. I think it will just give you a headache you don't need. Not knowing if he will get out in the middle of the night, also falling out may happen with as much as they move around. I would suggest buying a used crib from a mom2mom sale or off craigslist. I'm sure you can get one for $30 or something just to get you by until he is closer to 3 and really ready for one. Good luck!!!

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G.B.

answers from Detroit on

My first 2 were 12 1/2 mos apart and my oldest was an adventurer. I kept the baby in her little infant bed in our room till she tipped it over pulling up on the side (maybe I waited a wee bit oo long!), then I moved the oldest to the twin bed I'd already placed in her room and plunked the baby in the crib. The oldest was already climbing out anyway! Then the younger one climbed out earlier than I'd imagined (boy, was she a climber!) so I left the side down on her bed & she was happy in it for a couple more years till I needed it for #3!

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N.B.

answers from Detroit on

Have you thought about a toddler bed? or maybe one that transitions into a twin bed? Check out Babies R Us and Ikea. We got our daughters bed from Ikea and it has 3 different sizes that you can use, with a mattress that fits all 3. We love it (and so does our daughter).
It may not be a bad idea to try and start switching your son to a big boy bed soon, I can't imagine how hard it would be when your new little one is almost too big for a bassinett and your met with resistance from your son. It might be easier to try it now so it's not like your son is being kicked out of his crib to make room for someone else.
Good luck!

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K.A.

answers from Detroit on

Hi Jennifer. I was expecting our 2nd child and my first son was 2 years old. we just moved him into his own twin bed. We made a big deal of him going to the big boy bed. we did leave the crib up and told him that this was now going to be his brothers bed. It may have been a little easier transition because we actually moved him into another bedroom so everything was new and he felt like he was important. Yes, we did start having him get our of bed but we knew that would happen. Make it a special treat for your 1st child. Let him pick out the sheets, bed spread, and make sure the new area (bed) is his own.

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M.M.

answers from Lansing on

Oh my boys are like 15 and a half months apart and what I did was got the toddler bed and set it up in his room so he could get used to it. That toddler bed must have been in there for about 3 months or so before I finally took the crib away. I did have my second son sleep in the bassinet and with me for about 6 months before I started having him sleep in the crib. Amazing thing is my first was about 18 months when he started sleeping in the toddler bed and now here I am looking at my second, who is now 17 months and thinking no way, I can't imagine putting my second in the toddler bed I can't believe I put my first in the toddler bed. But that is all in my head. It did take over a week of repetitive and consistency putting him back into bed. Have you watched Super Nanny??LOL....but rest assured that they do eventually stop coming out of their bed, it is a new found freedom so I can't say I blame the children for testing it out. But the best thing was getting my first child used to the toddler bed in his room like climbing in and out and before I knew it he was laying in it and the second key is NOT taking it right from the first child and putting the second child in their. So good luck and let me know if you have any further questions or want to chat. I am a stay at home mommy and am open to meeting and chatting with new people just let me know...

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B.S.

answers from Detroit on

Hey Jennifer,

Congratulations!

My boys are 18 months apart too (now 14 months and 32 months). We kept the youngest in our room in a bassinet for 9 weeks, then moved them both to cribs in their own rooms. Today they are still both in cribs, as my oldest has always been a great sleeper, and doesn't seem interested in climbing out (yet!). And they are both in convertible cribs, so we'll transition them someday to toddler/full size beds.

Oh and we ran out of time (somehow that always seems to happen with the 2nd baby! HA!) and didn't end up moving my oldest into the other bedroom until about 3-4 weeks prior to his brother's birth. I thought all the changes would be too much (and I had the same feelings - about him being my baby, nastalgic about moving him from the "nursery", etc), but it went a LOT more smoothly than I thought. Do what works best for you and your son - either making a big deal or not.

Enjoy your babies!

Warmly,
B.

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M.M.

answers from Lansing on

Jennifer,

I wanted to let you know that I have three boys. Our first 2 we moved to a toddler bed at 2yrs old we always did it on there birthday and made a big deal about being a big boy. They got to pick out new bedding and everything. We just took down the crib and put up the bed and that was that. For our third we switched him at 18 months. We did it for different reason he hated sleeping in the crib but did it the same way and he did just fine. We put up a baby gate so he could only go from our room to his he usually wakes up most nights and comes into sleep with us and still does to this day and he is 3.5. This was much better no screaming and crying to come get him we just taught him if you wake up come into mommy and daddy room and he did it. It is great he just laid down to go back to sleep no more calming him down to settle down to go back to sleep. Like I said he is 3.5 and we don't even use the gate anymore he still comes into our room and goes right back to sleep it's great.. Hope this helps.

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B.B.

answers from Detroit on

If your planning on nursing then it was always easier for me to keep the baby in a bassinett in our room...

I agree that what ever you do decide the changes (moving to big bed, setting up a new crib etc...)should be done a bit before baby arrives.
Maybe set up the big bed and let him try it out... Not only will he get used to it, He may also transition himself. Start by putting him in it at nap times. Insist that he stay in it during naps... (by insist I mean keep putting him back in if he gets up.) See how he handles it and judge from there if he wants to stay in it at night.

For my little guy I put some books beside his bed so he could amuse himself while falling asleep.
You will probibly want to take any toys out of the room and make sure there is nothing he can pull over on himself then listen on the monitor for the noises. And keep putting him back in. Around 18 - 20 months is when all 3 of my kids first climbed out of their cribs. That is an Immediate eviction notice for the crib in my book.

We use a toddler sized toddler bed. It uses the same mattress as the cribs do. So I put their crib mattress on it and they still have the same "homey" smell and feel and don't feel like they will be lost in the big bed. :-)

Its one of those six of one or half a dozen of the other situations.
Good luck and congrats...

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N.B.

answers from Detroit on

I am kinda in the same situation as you except mine will be 26 months when my new one is born. My son may be ready for a big boy bed, but he is still not climbing out and I personally want the peace of mind to know he is safe in his crib when the new one arrives. Right now he sleeps so well in his crib and puts himself to sleep, I know if I get him a big boy bed he will not stay in it. Plus my first son used his crib and then toddler bed till he was 3. So we opted for a new crib for baby, and my son will get a big boy set in a year or so. That is what we decided hope it gives you some insight. :) Godd luck witht he new one and congrats!

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