Morning Drop off at School

How about they take the bus! I would drive to the bus stop or walk to bus stop just to avoid the craziness. Bus ride is the best part of the day!

I always dropped off the older kid at his school first because historically, it's always a zoo at elementary drop off. Especially that first week.

I would ask why it was closed. At the school my daughter goes to, we don't have a drop off or pick up zone. Cars block the one street, cannot enter the other due to access for buses (which makes total sense as far as I am concerned) and the other is a busy street. Sometimes there is an officer that comes down the one street and tells people to move along.
As for the new principal, when my older kids went to the school starting in 3rd grade, the principal had been there 2 years. She was awesome, she knew everyone. She walked around the school and greeted anyone and everyone. She talked to the kids and knew most parents. When I saw her if she was outside, she would greet me and ask how my kids were when they moved on to middle school. Unfortunately, she retired when my daughter finished kinder. She has not once greeted us when we go to open house or other events at the school. She has been there, I have seen her but not even a hello. The assistant principal is the person that talks to parents though even he is not as open with everyone as the former was.

The drop off circle had serious disadvantages. I think I remember you complaining about that, too. I suggest that you try out this new plan for a few weeks. It will be tweeked so let principal know about what does and doesn't work for you. When you make suggestions for change, consider that this new way of drop off may work for the other hundred or so parents/children. Think of the bigger picture. Changing drop off may be helpful for other parents. Parking on the street makes more sense than having congestion complete with fender benders. The principal tried to make that work last year and wasn't able to.

Above all, do not confront the principal! Talk with him, keeping an open mind. Look for different ways for you to do drop off that might work better than what you're doing now. My granddaughter went to the same school as Nervy Girl's son. I drove my granddaughter to school. After trying several different times and locations, I found that the time I arrived made a difference. The street in front of this school has a no stopping, no parking sign. Parents dropped off kids there. Staff was present to facilitate drop off. If I went early (ask what time staff is present) no wait. Later, I did have to wait 5 or so minutes. Not a problem. I also found that often I could find a parking place closer to the school. Again depended on timing. I saw moms with young children get out of cars. You can go earlier to make this possible. Yes, an inconvenience; better than a crumpled fender or impatience waiting for access to drop off circle.

I suggest you give this a try. Adapting to change takes work. Often I find that the change is beneficial.

When my kids went to preschool there was no drop off, we had to park and walk in, and it was very limited parking.
Of course it was challenging with car seats and often sleeping babies in tow (especially in bad weather) but we made it work.
I don't think it's a good idea to add even more responsibility and stress to an already overworked and overwhelmed school staff, I think parents need to suck it up and get their kids to and from the door safely.
Just my opinion.

We once had similar problems with drop offs. So on a non-school day, we did a little scouting around. We drove near the school, around the drop-off route, and we found a great little side street that was rarely used. We could drive there, and our son could safely walk on a short sidewalk without having to cross the street. So maybe you can do something like that.

Or, ask the school district about a crossing guard. Don't confront, suggest positive changes.

Why anyone would think 'dropping off in the road' is an option for elementary-level students is absurd. It's not an option. Even city buses have to pull over to the curb, so those parents are *choosing* to put their child in harm's way. The school isn't forcing them to... that is their choice and the onus of responsibility is on the parent.

When my son went to school, we walked, rain or shine. I know other parents who live just a few doors down who drove. Their choice. Even then, traffic was not good around the school and I was glad to be escorting my son with crossing busy streets (full of distracted parents).... if we had driven (and when my husband would take him) we parked a bit away from the school and walked him in. If you schedule time for it, it's not hard. As someone else pointed out, we did that with our preschoolers. I'm not sure that catering to car culture needs to be a high priority for admin when people are just being too darn lazy to get out of their cars to walk their kids a block or three. Really, what does it HURT? It's far safer, you get more time with the child, and yeah, life can be inconvenient. But no, I would not bring it up to admin. They have told you what their goal is; just because *you* didn't see the principal (do you know how often our principal would start out at the door and get called away to deal with something? Multiple times in the mornings!) doesn't mean they weren't there or weren't intending to be there.

I'm reading this and it's late so I apologize if I'm not reading this right.

They changed the whole way the drop off procedure goes - just so a principal could greet students and parents? That seems like a whole lot of confusion and disruption just for making introductions. Is there a possibility that there is more to this that you just aren't aware of?

Usually decisions like that are based on safety reasons - and for managing traffic (most efficiently).

At our schools, we all have to enter through the main entrance. This is for security reasons.

Is it possible they might want everyone to have to go through one door for this reason?

Well, your sentences kind-of run together, so I can't figure out if you wrote why the dropoff driveway was closed. If you don't know why, then I think it's fair to ask. If you know why, then I think it's fair to make an appointment to talk to the principal *if you can come with a solution in hand*. For example, "I know the drop off driveway was closed because it was backing up into traffic and causing problems on the main road. Maybe we could reopen it, and increase the time window for dropoff, so that everyone isn't trying to come at the same time." Because if you say you want it reopened, but don't have a solution for whatever problem it caused last year, I don't think you'll be successful.

Also, I would not "confront" the school about it. I would go to the principal with a "let's brainstorm ideas together to see if we can come up with a better solution" attitude.

ETA: Just saw your SWH. Can you talk to the PTA about having a social to meet her instead?

Also, doesn't your post say that there were a bunch of fender-benders last year when the dropoff lane was open? Maybe that's the real reason it's closed now.

The new policy (park and walk) is a very common one. There can be issues with the driveway drop off (people not pulling up all the way, cars trying to pass each other from the back of the line, etc.). Every new principal in the schools my kids have gone to has re-tooled the drop off and pickup process because rarely is there an ideal solution. Give it a few weeks to work out the kinks and then send a polite e-mail to the principal with your feedback. Change is hard - maybe after people get used to it, it will be a safe and smooth process. Or maybe it won't be, and needs to be tweaked...but give it a chance first.

It truly is a safety issue because you have cars backing up while kids are trying to get through the parking lot. A fender bender is the least of your worries.

Does your school have a PTA? Maybe you could bring this up with them and see if things can be changed back. It might require parent volunteers to be there at drop off and pick up times so you should step up and volunteer if the changes are made.

All the schools my kids attended had specific drop off areas. The elementary school ones were supervised by parents although a lot of times the principal or assistant would be out there greeting the kids as they started the day.

Where I am from either children live within walking distance from the school or they take the school bus to school. Those parents who choose to drive are asked to drop off one block over from the school and let the children walk from there, so that there is not as much traffic congestion in front of the school. Some schools here have implemented a "walking school bus" for kids who are driven. A member of the school staff or a parent volunteer meet the children a block or two from the school and walk them to school, and again walk them from the school to the side street where the parents are waiting after school. Most schools simply have school patrol crossing guards, usually 5th or 6th grade students with vests and flags, who cross the children at the intersections near the school. For schools on major thoroughfares an adult is often hired to perform that duty. I'm not sure why children need to be walked to the door. You could simply walk your child across the street while the other children remain in the car with the door locked within your sight. By the time a child is in kindergarten they should be capable of navigating down the sidewalk and in the door to the school without a parent holding hands.

Elementary drop off is always nuts the first couple of weeks.
I seems odd that they would close the drop off since the children go in the same door. Maybe they are doing something to make it flow better and haven't figured it out yet, which is sad.

I would not "confront" anyone but it is perfectly ok to inquire about it. Maybe there is a reason.

I wouldn't be bent out of shape about not meeting the principal. Ours stands in the front entrance daily until the first bell rings, then she goes to her office to prepare for announcements and such.

It sounds like the bus would be a good option for you!

The school year has just started, so greeting parents is on the Principal's agenda, but just not something he/she has done yet. Could there be traffic concerns? I know in Chicago, drop off circles can extend down half a city block and when the neighbors start complaining and threatening to call the police, there is a change in policy.

I think we all value a positive relationship with the administrators at our child's school. Could you send an e-mail to the Principal and simply say that you have another child in your car and children being who they are, it can double your time to get your child to get to the door with the new policy? That way, you aren't criticizing his/her thinking just conveying information.

Rather than use the term "confront," I'd approach it in the spirit of cooperation: "How can we work together to ensure the safety of the kids by eliminating old traffic patterns that didn't work, evaluation new ones which may or may not work better, and ensure a smooth start to the school day for parents, kids, and staff? How can we assist staff, perhaps through developing a parent volunteer crew or by meeting with you in a small or large group to learn your ideas, welcome you to the community, and share our willingness to collaborate?" I'd see if you can take a couple of the other 5 mothers with you to have a good balance of input and ideas.

I honestly think that "meeting the principal at the door" is silly - he's not going to get to know you that way at all, and even if you were to get in any kind of conversation with him, that would automatically prevent him from greeting other parents who he's also "close enough to touch." A simple smile and good morning "hello" is symbolic but it's not really "meeting" or learning anything about him. So please find out what the plans are for the principal to have a series of parent coffee dates, what happens on Open School Night, and what plans the principal probably has for visiting each and every classroom to meet the kids in their own environment rather than in the hallway during the chaos of arrival.

I sympathize that you are not within the bus route, but I'd consider dropping your child at the bus stop so that he can enter safely with the other kids (which I assume is supervised by drivers, monitors or school staff), and so he can have the socialization and group experience on the bus. If drop off is complicated by way too many parents driving kids who could otherwise take the bus, I think that should be looked at. We have so many kids in our district who get driven to school just so they don't have to get up 5 minutes earlier, and it's a nightmare. It creates total gridlock.

I don't fully understand the layout of your school, so perhaps this wouldn't work: but why does a child have to be escorted to the door by a parent? Isn't there a way that a parent with other kids in the car could get out, help the grade school child safely across the street while still standing close to the car containing the younger children, and get the child on the walk toward the school door? That's what happens in our schools - parents do not make the hike with the kids, and the independence for the child starts as soon as the child is on the walkway or school lawn.

It's hard to answer without fully knowing the setup of your school, but I'll answer based on how things are at my school...

I agree that it's annoying that they closed the dropoff circle if it has always worked well in the past. However, if parents are too lazy/rushed to wait in the line and end up letting their kids out in the middle of the street, then I do think requiring parents to park and get out of their cars to walk the children in is the way to go.

Also, our school is in the middle of a residential neighborhood. While there are two main streets that people use for drop off, there are several other streets where parents could park the car and walk their kids in without having any traffic around at all. It makes me crazy that everyone packs into the two streets that are right at school, creating lots of traffic, when they could be one short block farther away to park and walk their kids in. It just strikes me as being very lazy - creating busy, dangerous traffic because they can't be bothered to get out of the car. I understand it can be a pain if you have other kids in the car and/or if you have to get work or another school dropoff, but still... I think everything would be a lot less chaotic if people would be willing to be just a tiny bit farther away.

We don't have buses where I live. Everyone either walks, bikes, or drives themselves. My family typically walks or bikes because I find the traffic around school to be so aggravating.

I guess my point is this - could you park slightly farther away to park and drop off your child? This would alleviate the potential for fender benders and the danger of kids crossing in the middle of the street.

I would call and ask, and be ready to hear their answer. Ask not only the reason, but ask for their safe solution. It could be that if none of the decision makers has been in your particular situation (this exact drop off with other little ones in the car, going to orher schools, etc) that they don't realize what a serious problem it is. They may just view it as a minor inconvenience rather than a safety issue.

Also, speak only for yourself. "Five of my best friends" or "all of the other moms" will be instantly tuned out. "I have a big safety concern" will be more likely to be heard.

Absolutely. This is weird, and clearly not efficient either. Our principal stands at the front entrance and greets kids who walk up, get walked in by their parents, and get dropped off from the line. If you have a front door, which is presumably where the car drop off line would go, then I don't get it....which leads me to believe there is probably some sort of bigger issue here. Maybe that's the story they gave parents but honestly, it doesn't make sense. Maybe something happened or they are trying to figure out a better safety policy, who knows. But, I absolutely would make some official inquiries and write an email to the principal about it.

ETA:
Okay, so after reading your SWH, I get that maybe it's not quite so cut and dry. However, I think it's still worth a chat with the principal because it seems a lot less efficient and possibly more dangerous?

As another poster suggested maybe it is just a beginning of the year thing since things get so crazy? Hope you get it worked out the way you want!

Yes, say something! At both my kids' school and the school I teach at pick up/drop off was a nightmare! And extremely dangerous. We had some really close calls at my school, even with crossing guards. At both schools changes were made. It still isn't perfect, and lots of parents complain, but it is safer. At my school it even involved getting the city involved and changing the direction of a one way city street and adding some no parking areas. There is also police enforcement of the area during pick up/drop off. My kids' school totally changed where busses drop off. At both schools there are staff out reminding parents of the rules. Including the principals.

Definitely talk to the principal. Highlight the safety of the kids more than the inconvenience to the parents. Safety is a #1 issue for schools and they will take action. Don't blindside the principal. Call and make an appointment to talk with him about the safety concerns you have about pick up/drop off. Don't mention that you are irritated that he hasn't introduced himself yet. Just say it is nice to finally meet him. Principals, especially ones new to a building, are overwhelmed with meeting everyone. The more people who bring up the issue, the more likely he will really understand how bad it is. Maybe a couple of you can go in together. If not, encourage other parents to make appointments with him. Involve the PTA if you have one. Contact the president and ask if the issue can be addressed. If nothing is done or the principal seems to brush it off, try contacting the district's transportation department or safety department. Hopefully it won't take a close call or worse with a kid before changes are made.

The school my kids went to for years had a circle and every car was greeted individually. The people there to get the kids out opened the doors, greeted the kids, and made sure they got inside. Today, my youngest started a new elementary school due to the program he's in (STEM).

When my husband and I dropped him off, they had a cone blocking the roadway as a stopping point about 5 cars past the door kids go in. Then they had a sign saying "Car Riders" about 5 cars before the door to go in. They blew a whistle and the kids got themselves out of the car and walked inside. Once all kids were inside they moved the cone and the 10 cars moved on, 10 more cars moved up.

Another school my older two went to for two months was different too. You had to park and walk into the cafeteria to sign your child out.

My favorite is the first scenario, but that school had the manpower and long driveway to do that.

Asking about the policy never hurts.

ADDED - where my kids went to pre-school it was park and bring them in. I had infants during that time so it was a challenge sometimes but doable. The parking lot was AWFUL too. And today we saw a bunch of kids walking to school. I haven't seen that since I moved here because of the location of my kids schools...it was neat!

This sounds dumb although it sounds like its just for the first few days. I would call and tell them I have other kids in the car and it doesn't make sense to park and walk. It would help to know how old your kid is but I would think they would manage to walk without assistance to the front of the school.

As far as meeting the new principal, my son's school has a new one and he's been in school since the 9th and I haven't met him and I don't really care frankly. Even if he greeted you at the door I'm sure he won't "remember" you so not sure I see that as being a big deal in my opinion. However, drop off and pick up should be as seamless as possible. Good luck.

I always parked and walked my kid into school.
Drop off lines just get a little too wild sometimes.
I'm not a fan of them.
If you have other kids to watch - then get someone else to take your son to school OR get a baby sitter to watch the other kids while you drop him off.

Schedule a meeting with the principal. I'm sure they didn't sit around and think of ways to inconvenience parents, so there is a good reason for this. You mentioned you could take the bus, so I would try that option to see if it works better for you.

No, I would not "confront" anyone. You could send a polite inquiry, though, probably through email would be your best bet, if you want a reply. But confrontation over such things usually just makes you look bad and accomplishes the opposite of what you are after.

I would have an issue with this but I am not sure what the appropriate avenue would be, maybe an email to the VP or mentioning at the next PTA meeting to see how other parents feel?