D.M.
It's not you. You are one person doing two full time jobs - and there simply are not enough hours in the day. It's great that your family is helpful and supportive! Funny you mention getting a haircut - I'm with you - WHEN DO YOU FIND THE TIME...?
What I've found to help is to schedule some time on the weekends for YOU and the things you must get done (i.e. haircut) Even if it's every other Sat from 10-12... or whatever works for your family.
Can your husband make some calls - insurance etc.?
Also, I was a neat freak before the two kids (17 mos apart) both under three... and I've learned to just let some of it go a bit. Not to be unclean, but the little mess here and there is okay. I can go to bed without picking it ALL up - I just focus on picking up just one room a night... keeps me a little more sane.
Probably no enlightening news here - just to be kind to yourself, appreciate all you are doing and how much you are doing... and know you are doing a great job!