Loving One Kid More than the Other/ Favoring

I grew up being VERY aware that my mother preferred my sisters over me. I would NEVER EVER do that to a child. It's cruel. If a parent can't love all their children equally they should not be having more then one child...in my opinion.

Not a chance. I love them each with an infinity amount, so it's not possible to favor any one. I appreciate their unique differences.

My favorite is whichever one is asleep at the time.

I don't love one *more* than the others, but I do love them all differently. It's like, if my love for my girls were measured in pebbles in a jar for each of them, then each jar would have the same *number* of pebbles, but they'd be all different colours and sizes.

My mom has explained this to me as I prepare to welcome our 2nd child. She told me that I will love them both with all my heart and that both will be just as important, but the love will be different. She said the bonds would be different and the needs of each child will affect the relationships that exist between mother and child. The love is not less, just different. The closeness of the relationships is different which can lead to "favoritism" or the appearance of it.

I know people who go days or weeks without making contact with their parents because that is how they go about life.....I HAVE to call my parents EVERY day at least once, most times multiple times a day, lol. It's just my relationship with them. It doesn't mean those that call less are less loved or have less love than my parents and I share, it's just the way they do things. Siblings are the same way....one will inevitably be closer to the parents or one parent than the other(s) because of their personality.

I love all my children the same. Right now my 1yo is currently my favorite because he can't talk back,loves to cuddle,and only has smiles for me......

In complete honesty, no. I click with each of my kids in different ways though, so does my husband. My son's sense of humor is just like mine so we joke around more together. My daughter has a huge love of everything living, so we share that. Hubby thinks our daughter can do no wrong (which he is mistaken) but he adores her as his baby girl and my son as his "pal". It's good to find different but equal common ground with all.

I don't favor my kids nor one over the other, or love 1 more than the other.
They are 2 different individuals.
And I know that.
I am close, to each one, in a special way.
My kids are not jealous about each other or when I am with one or the other.
They are secure.

My kids, are both, Mommy's girl/boy or Daddy's boy/girl. They are close to my Hubby and I, in their own way, as well.
It is not a competition.
There are special things, they do with each of us.

It is sad, when a parent favors a child or scolds one more than the other.... just because of gender or not, or how they look.
The child, WILL know that and feel it.... and it will affect them. Negatively.

sure everyone loves all of their kids. but sometimes you just don't get along as well with one person compared to another - even if you gave birth to them.

i honestly just love them differently, it may appear i favor one but i really dont. We as mothers know the individual needs of our kids. My youngest requires more cuddling and smooching, while my oldest always required more verbal encouragement. An onlooker might see this as me favoring my youngest, but she is merely just more high maintenance.

nope, I don't love one more than the other......& it takes a lot to say/do that because our older son put us thru H. from age 15-21! & no, I'm not being a smart-mouth or facetious.....it's the honest to goodness Truth!

But, I will say that I do love my sons ....each in their own way. My older son has to fight/resist so many things in his life.....he chooses to struggle again & again. Drives me nuts! But on the other hand, we share the same BD....& many good things in life - both avid readers, both music freaks, both love vintage comedy/movies....& we both have that "snap-on" when it comes to deciphering problems.

My younger son....pretty much rolls with the flow! He achieves easily, embraces life & it's "good" opportunities, & lives hard in his chosen path. He's already planned his midlife crisis - he won't be buying a sports car, because he'll already own that.....instead he's planning on buying an airplane! Too funny....what a warpo! I love how he embraces life!

Both sons alternately complement each other. Their thought processes are very different....& since my older son has rejoined the family, they are best buds. At 14 & 23, this is a joy to see.....Since his hip replacement surgery, my older son has no qualms about pinning his little bro to the floor! & my younger son has no qualms about verbally pinning his bro to the wall.....in front of everyone! I love when big brother just shakes his head & says, "I hate you. You have Mom's mouth!" !! We all know that the tables are going to turn....but are enjoying the show while it lasts....especially when both dogs join in on the wrestling match!

Thanks for asking the ?.....it gave me a feel-good feeling!

Although I know this is wrong in alot of people's eyes, me not being in favor either, it is part of human nature to go back and forth with "close" and "distance". I have two daughters and was more protective over my youngest when she was born than i was with my oldest. Mostly because she was born via emergency c-section and i almost lost her. As a teengage, and even now, i myself have gone back and forth between my parents. One day i will real close to my mom and distant from my dad and then the next day it will be vice versa. People do it with everything. Parents, siblings, friends, children, teachers, and even pets. It does not make anyone a horrible person, it just means you they need to focus and try to work on the relationship that is currently the weakest. All you and they have to do is remember that no matter who they are (boy, girl, youngest, oldest) they all have feelings and just want to feel like they are loved and important. :)

I am lucky enough to have 3 totally special and unique children whom I love very much! I do not favor any of them. My oldest is my first born, so I have a soft spot for him...but my middle child is a *TRUE* one of a kind, I tell you that kid is like nothing I've ever seen before, so I have a soft spot for him....then there is my 3rd child who is my ONLY girl in a house full of boys, so I have a soft spot for her!

~I truly feel blessed that things worked out this way for me. I know what it's like when parents play favorites...my dad favored me and my mom favors my sister and my Aunt (whom I lived with for awhile) has a *HORRIBLE* record of picking 1 child out of each family and SERIOUSLY favoring them, she favored me and it was really hard on my sister! Everyone in our family can tell you exactly who she favors, it's that obvious...
Out of her own kids it was Rusty
Grandchildren:
Jamie over Kelsey
Taylor over Tawny
RJ over Savannah
Damien over Cash
Jessica over Amber
It is so sad!

I try not too. My MIL favors my oldest big time. It drives me nuts! I have to work extra hard to make the younger two happy...because big brother is gold in her eyes!!

I try not too. I am the middle child...and sadly have some of the same middle child feelings...my older sister was amazing in school. My little sister is seven years younger then me. My parents also had more money while she was younger..so she got everything I had always wanted and never got because they couldnt afford it. I love both of them dearly and know my mom did the best she could. And that meant I was a little left out growing up...I am reaping the benefits of things now...My older sister is gone in Alaska and my little sister is in that stage of life...well let me put it this way...she will be 21 in December..so she is ''figuring'' it out...I get my mom to myself...pretty much whenever I want too now!! She is one of my best friends!!

So I really try not to favor my own...I try and give them all just a bit of mommy to themselves.....

I love both my kids and try my best to treat them equally. But my son can sometimes drive me crazy because our personalities just clash at times. My daughter is younger and more easy going so it is easier for me to spend time with her, though she has her moments. I kind of feel like the mother daughter bond is somehow closer than what I have with my son--but it may be just our family. Because we only have 2 kids it works out pretty well with each parent spending one on one time with one kid.

When I was growing up my sister always claimed mom loved me more and I countered that my dad was wrapped around her little finger. that was just how the personalities fit. But in the long run it worked out pretty well and I don't think either of us was shortchanged.

I honestly can't say that I love one more, just differently. My oldest was my first baby and made me a Mommy. Now that he is older we can talk and have inside jokes, he is such a sweet boy! My youngest looks just like me and he is such a snugly little guy. He'll give you a smile from across the room, run to you, and hug you like there's no tomorrow!
I just love them both SO much!!

I would give my life for either of. Y kids and love them withall of my being, but.... my kids are 10.5 yrs apart and I had my son very young. I feel like we have grown up together and that boy has a defining place in my heart. He has helped me thru hard times (my mom passing, my fav aunt passing) and just learning to be a good mom to him. He's almost 15 but I still hace days that I just want to sit by him and rub his head! Then there's my baby. She's 4 and I quit my job and changed my whole life to be home with her. She's my shadow, we are joined at the hip! So no, I don't favor one over the other they just touch my heart in different spots!

My dad favored my sister, my mom favored me. It wasn't that they loved one more than the other just that the personalities clicked a little better. Which is hysterical because my sister is really like my mom, and I am really like my dad. I guess opposites really do attract.

I don't love one more than the other but my girls are very different from each other. When one's weakness is becoming a hassle, I will think how great the other is in that area. And vice versa. It goes back and forth all the time. I don't compare them to each other in front of them though. My mom did that a bit and it hurt at times. So I love them the same but do have momentary favorites...

I often feel i'd be more devistated if my three-year-old died more than my baby. But thats because I have more memories and history with her. I'd geive harder with all those memories. But I feel I love them equally. I came from a home with favoritism. Of three girls, I was not the favorite. Each my parents either had a favorite, or simply found they related to that child better. I was aware of my fathers favoratism, but didn't discover my mother's until she accidentally slipped and mentioned it (though she always swore she loved us equally). You know what, I turned out way better than either one of them. Both of them suffered eating disorders, drug addiction, depression and have generally struggled in life. Sometimes I think its a burden to be a favorite child and can result in emotional incest wich is very damaging.

I don't favor I think. I click more with one over the others as does my hubby. Hubby and the youngest are the same exact personality, even is mom and dad were telling me how acted and responded just like hubby (hubby is a watcher and listener but doesn't want to interact with his toys... he would rather watch someone else play with them and clap when they do it right). So far the older 2 have more in common with me. they are both very tactile learners, like I am, so I just automatically think of activities/toys they will love. I try really hard to keep it all even and not be unfair. I just don't think of things that the youngest will like without thinking, the older 2 I just look back into my childhood and remember all the toys I loved and get those (like marble works, connects, legos and train sets).

I wouldn't say I love my kids differently, but I do have my favorite. However, my "favorite" switches. For awhile, my favorite used ot be my oldest. Lately, it's been my second. I make a very large attempt to treat all the kids the same. I was the clear favorite of my mother and my brother has a lot of issues because of it. I also have friends that you can plainly see that they favor one child over another.