Is It Normal to Feel Deep Regrets for Not Being Able to Breasfeed?

Don't let it get you down. What is most important is that your children are happy and healthy today. I had the same problem with my first child. For some reason she just would not latch no matter what I tried. I met with a lactation consultant twice and it seemed to help for a little bit but the night feedings were the worst. She woke me up almost every hour because when she did get some milk, it wasn't much because she wouldn't latch properly and she was still hungry. I can't count the nights I sat with her and had tears streaming down my face because I felt like I couldn't take care of her the way I was supposed to be able to. I finally put her on formula after pumping for what seemed like a million times a day. Once I started the formula, she ate so well and slept so good and was always happy. That's what helped me get through it. Seeing her happy was more important to me. Formulas these days are made so well. I talked with my doctor because it seemed like I was getting the beginnings of post partum and just talking with her about it made me feel better. She assured me that the first 2 weeks - Month is the most important and since she was able to get the colostrum and breastmilk for at least that long, that I shouldn't worry about failing her. She's 2 now and SOOO incredibly healthy that I have no regrets. Believe me, you did nothing wrong. You did what you knew and there's nothing wrong with that. You seeked help and everything so never think you didn't try your hardest. You sometimes wonder why things happen the way they do, but have faith that they happened that way for a reason. I can honestly say you sound like a great Mom. Some mom's don't even bother to consider breastfeeding knowing how good it is for your child..I hope it feels better to know you're not the only one...

I think it's completely normal to feel regret as a parent period. Am I using the right diapers? Am I using the right baby wash? Is the water too hot? Is the room too cold? We as mothers have this thing in us that at one point will tell us that we are the best mothers in the entire world, and then make us feel guilty for the smallest things. There is nothing wrong with having to use formula instead of breast. If the formula wasn't good for the baby, they wouldn't make it!! Atleast you tried, and it just wasn't meant to be! To some mothers, you may sound a bit lucky!! My daughter latched on as soon as she was 15 minutes old, and nursed every 20 minutes EVERY DAY until she was about 3 months old!! My nipples hurt, I was tired, I was sore, I JUST WANTED SOME SLEEP!! And, to top it all off, she rejected the bottle!!! The only relief that I got was a pacifier in between feedings since she just wanted the suction sometimes. After she took the bottle, I felt so guilty that I continued to nurse until she was 7 months old when she started getting teeth, and I HAD ENOUGH!! I was going to go CRAZY if I didn't get her off the breast! Though I am very happy that I was fortunate enough to be able to nurse my daughter, just remember that not all bonds are formed by breast feeding your children. I really hope that this helps you feel a little better!! Just remember don't feel guilty for the things you can't control!!

I know it's hard when you figure out that breast feeding might not be for you. I went through that with my daughter, who is now almost four. My husband and I were having problems when she was born and all the way up until she was about 6 months old, and the stress from that made it really difficult to nurse. I quit nursing her when she was about 4 months old, and at first I felt like a failure, but then I realized that giving her a bottle wasn't so bad. She would eat a bottle and be satisfied for much longer then she ever was on the breast. I am pregnant right now with our second child, due in Oct., and I plan to try breast feeding with this child, too. But, if I run into problems, I am just going to go with the bottle and not beat myself up over it. Just because you can't breast feed, doesn't mean you aren't a good mother. And there's plenty of products out there that are almost as good as mother's milk, to keep your baby healthy. Don't beat yourself up over it!

oh honey, don't despair, it's really okay. it was very hard for my son to latch and I had to supplement with formula sometimes and you know what, he's just fine. my own mother had to go to formula very soon after she had me because she got an infection and i'm very healthy. don't worry, your son is going to be fine, formula is very good for babies. i really don't think that anyone is looking at you as if you are a bad mother, it's your own insecurity that is telling you that. You're a great mother and you obviously have the best of intentions with your baby, and that's all that matters. he'll be fine. just be his mommy and everything will work out. good luck to you....K.