I Have Friends but Feel Friendless.

LOL! I just put this same thing on Facebook and had 40 responses. Its hard to make friends, it seems. Although I work from home, my kids are older. I decided to join some new groups on Meetup.com (its free). You can search your area for SAHMs or anything really. I joined a country dance group, a cooking group, a over 40 and fabulous group and a couple family groups. Maybe you can find a couple new friends that has the same things in common as you. Good luck!

Tell your Husband, to hire you a babysitter or Nanny.
Even for just a couple of times a week.
Really.
He can't expect you to be a hermit Mom.
You are Human.

I have a friend, with 3 kids, and her Husband has to travel ALL the time for work, he is hardly home, and has long hours.
So, he got her a part-time Nanny... to give her a break. So she can even do errands, without going bonkers.
She'd have days, when she'd just CRY, because she was just, like a Single Parent. And her Husband, was hardly home, so when he was home, it was just like a hotel stay.

The thing is, since a Husband is HARDLY home due to work, then HE ALSO NEEDS TO PROBLEM SOLVE THAT, and be a participating Spouse, too, and help the Wife, even if he is hardly home. Being he is hardly home, he will NOT know, they everyday toil, that a Mom/Wife does.
And for YOU, you NEED to TELL YOUR HUSBAND, so that, he knows darn well... what it is like being like a Single Mom while he is away.
My friend's Husband, luckily... understood his Wife, and so he got her a part-time Nanny. Who comes in the evening because that is when it was hardest, for her. She has 3 kids, ALL young and boys, and super super active.

There are other moms out there in the same situation. They would be happy to find you. But you do have to get out. Depending on your kids' ages, some things you can try are: hanging out at a busy park, joining a mom's bible study or mommy and me group, volunteering in your kids' classrooms (get a sitter for the little ones), take a class. You have to make time to go out. It's important for your mental health and worth the effort!

Well, my question to you is, do you call them up to do things? I'm just saying that it goes both ways. They call you when they need something, but do you go out of your way to show them you care or want to spend time with them? It takes a lot of work to have/keep friends as an adult. Trust me, I get where you're coming from. Friends take time to find & time to keep. Just finding the right type of person is like dating. It's exhausting. I have a small handful of friends right now & as much as I want to meet more people, I just don't have the time, working full time & being a mom & wife. I found it easier when I was a SAHM to find/maintain friends, honestly. Just put yourself out there, be open, and it will happen. Just don't try too hard, and be genuine.

Thank you for all the responses. Our kids are 8, 5 and 3. They play sports. I do meet people but it doesn't go far as to hanging out. Some people these days you don't know who you can trust and open up to. We are in the process of finding a new home in which we rent. I have looked up the meetup.com and all I can do is see where it goes. We do have horses and go to the barn and have people and other kids we talk to but not much out of the barn. Yes, there are days in which I just want to give up and have the kids run the house. Me and the kids do get out and we go places and they do have a blast. I am a people person but then nothing goes further into more play dates after the one. Where I am there aren't many people who I can just leave my kids to during the day. They are either busy or I can't get intouch with someone.
Yes, I do call them up to do things but it is so hard to get in touch with her. When she has things to do and get with her other friends I am on the back burner (that's how I feel). This friend and her husband have a lot, 4 kids and they are the ages of my own. and he doesn't have a great paying job. They have had to move out of their house and move in with her parents which didn't go so well and we couldn't go visit all i knew is it wouldn't be a good idea. Then I find out they moved out and went to live with his parents. Since then I have only heard from her once. We have helped them also to make sure her kids had a christmas we helped them with purchasing gifts. I feel like we are here to help money wise and that's it. I just hate it for them so I always jump to it.

Wow, I could have written this! My hubby travels as well. I have one good friend who lives an hour away, I feel like I unload on her when we get together, which is only every few months. I have 'friends' around here, but I feel like they are more acquaintances, not people I could call if I really needed a friend.

I joined a book club and that helped a lot. Gives me a project to work on (reading!) during the month, and then a guaranteed outing once a month. Not expecting deep friendships, but definitely a good outlet for me and a nice group of ladies to talk with.

I would encourage something like that for you. Book club, bible study, meetups, whatever you can find. Checkout the meetup.com thing, look at your local library, ask around at your kids' school (if they are in school yet). Many ways to find folks in your same boat. Good luck to you!

It's hard especially when your husband works out if town and you are the only one to manage things around the house. How old are your kids?
I'd suggest getting involved with some activities with the kids that would open you up to meeting some parent's with kids the same age. And also getting involved in something maybe just for adults- get a babysitter if you can for an hour a week- join a walking or boot camp or something...even ask around your neighborhood if anyone woukd want to walk for an hour or so during the week....
Good luck! Hang in there!