I Dont care...I Can Do What I Want

What he wants is you and your undivided attention. You've got a full house, and he's at the age where he wants to do things with you. Some folks think that babies need us most, oh contrare... as kids get older, the needs increase. Pre-schoolers, then grade school and finally high school kids, the older they get, the more focused attention they need and you have to be there when they need it, the consequences of not being there are pretty big. So with that said.... Have Dad watch the younger two boys and you spend some one on one time with Brody. Find out what's going on in his world. What does he like to do these days, don't assume you already know, because it's evident that something's going on that you are unaware of. He's becoming very self-reliant. Capable of climbing high places to get what he wants, what he assumes he needs. So talk it out Mom. Also, where is Dad in all of this? Dad could do some male bonding time with this growing boy. Your son doesn't need drugs, he needs discipline, solid consequences to his behaviors... good ones and bad ones. He needs attention. Trust your gut. Put your medications in a locked bathroom cabinet. The knives and scissors issue is one that you'll have to discuss with Brody in the light of day, not during the middle of the night. Knowing boundaries of what's your's and what's his is important stuff. Take your purse to your room and put it in your closet. Having locked cabinets for tv controls and purses in high places doesn't sound like a happy home, it sounds pretty rigid and controlled. There needs to be room to grow, so think about your day to day activities. I realize you have 3 boys, but with those boys you have to be flexible, like an oak in the wind. You're overwhelmed and you're reacting by shutting down and locking things down. This isn't all on you. Get Dad to be involved when he gets home from work and on the weekends. Parenting is a 24x7 job/obligation/joy/privlege... he needs to step up and participate. He snoozes, he loses. Maybe Brody could benefit from a pre-school environment where he's with other kids, interacting with someone other than the younger brothers where he isn't in control or the 'big brother' responsible for them, or worse yet, the ring leader. If grandma wants to help, have her come stay with the kids for an hour while you get out of the house and blow some steam off at a gym, a grocery store, a library, or a craft store..somewhere for you time. Spend sometime talking with your husband and together face this situation, working together. It took the both of you to create these kids, it's going to take the both of you to raise them.

Well don't drug him just yet. :)
As soon as I saw that you have a 2yo and 8mo.... I would guess he needs three things:
1. Time with you...one on one attention and all that. You are pretty busy with the babies and he is at the age where he can take care of himself...and do what he wants :)
2. Teach him how to have a relationship with his brothers. How to make the laugh, push a ball back and forth, Teach him how to get positive attention from them as well.
3. Be upfront about wanting your attention. After the first couple "I need mom" displays from my kids, I talked to them about saying "I need some "momma time"...usually it is only about five minutes of holding them on my lap. But they are very good about letting me know.
That was quite the display of "If I get into every single thing that I know I'm not supposed to get into then I will get mom's attention"

It sounds like a spanking every now and then wouldn't hurt him too much. I try to reserve spankings as a consequence for not going to "time-out" and for safety. It sounds like your child is definitely doing things that are unsafe, so I think that a spanking would appropriate. I also don't believe in medicating children, but a well-placed swat on the bum can sometimes get their attention, especially if they are few and far between.

Hi E.,

What a night!!! I know exactly what u are going through.. My four year old is really going through a phase that has me at my wits end. Night times and going out are the worst for me right now!

I decided to try a behavior chart. I found this site, goalforit.com. It is a points based chart program. U can set the goals, rewards, and the amount of points he can earn.

He can earn points for doing certain things that I have set a priority for the week. He seems to be really into it, and has gone out of his way to earn those points for a reward. (like going to the park, or 30 min of tv, or the swim center) . I have really tried to not put an emphasis on the bad behavior, but have tried to really reward him for his good behaviors. I have been doing it for 2 weeks, and it seems to be making a differance.

Good Luck!

E.,
Wow. The scary part is of course he's getting into medicine. Even his vitamins can be toxic if they contain iron.
I am not a big proponent of physical punishment, but when it comes to safety issuses you need to lay down the law.
You need to be very very clear. Tying down and paddling his butt? I'm not so sure about that. I would get the bottles, put the on the floor. Get eye to eye with him, hands on his shoulders, and speak, very sternly. Your husband should be with you too. This is a big deal. He could have been poisended.

It sounds to me like he needs a good spanking. My almost 4 year old is alot like that. One thing i have done other than the good old fashioned spanking is to lock him in his room. a latch lock from the outside has kept my little guy of of a lot of trouble and keeps him in his room at night. I can hear him ifhe nneds to go to the bathroom at night so that is not an issue. He needs to be reminded that he is not in charge...you are!