How to Stop My 2 Year Old from Running Away?

I have the same problem with my son and what has been working for me is the sort of reverse psychology theory, when he starts to run away from me I just say Mommy's leaving now, bye-bye and I walk the other way and he usually comes running after me. I also tell him that if he runs away from me that we will leave (the playground, the library, etc.) and that sometimes works too.
Good Luck!

Punish the bad behavior by leaving immidately, but don't forget to praise the good too. A reward is not a horrible idea, but remember that some kids then start to think that just because they are listening they get a new toy. It is hard, but try to work toward getting her to behave because SHE WANTS to. The leaving right away thing is difficult too, but I left an entire grocery cart with a very nice store worker once and explained that my daughter could not behave herself so we had to leave. I think my daughter was embarassed that she had behaved so poorly(she was about 2 1/2) that she never did it again. More than anything else be consistant in the approach you choose.

My friend does this to her child too, and I just watch and shake my head. Why WOULDN'T your child keep doing this, when you chase after her each time? Kids LOVE to be chased, and those kids that you see running through the stores with their parents not far behind chasing and screaming after them are completely in a role reversal crisis. Let's not ever forget who's in control in a parent/child relationship. My friend's child COMPLETELY controls her, and she just turned 3!!! My kids would NEVER run away from me, but if they ever did, I would stop in my tracks, and stare at them with "the look". If they kept running, I would say "okay, Aryana (my daughter)! I'm going to keep shopping! We'll see you later!" Now the first time you do this, chances are your child will not fall for it for awhile. But, make sure that the first time you attempt this, you go to a store that is specifically for the purpose of putting an end to the behavior. Go to a Walgreens, talk to the cashier at the front of the store, tell them what you're going to do and say "If you see her coming this way, please call me over the speaker" I'm not kidding, it's down right dangerous for you to allow this behavior to continue. What if you were chasing after her, slipped and fell while she continued to run, and someone grabs her and takes off with her while you're down? It's not just a nuisance, you're putting both of you in danger every time you allow it! So, back to the intervention part. A better idea would be to go into a small store like a Walgreens, bring your husband or mother or someone with you to stand at the door to leave. Let your child down and if she starts running away, saying "Bye, Aryana, mommy's here to shop not chase you" and literally walk the other way. Children freak out when they see they're mommy's not close to them, and your child will eventually stop the running. Let her run for as long as it takes the first few times she runs away because you have her trained right now to think "If I run, mom will chase me". So, she's going to run for quite a while, waiting for you to chase her. Once she realizes you really may not be coming after her, she will come back. Then the next time, she'll run a little less far before she comes back. Then, even less far before she realizes it. Eventually, she'll give up on it and WANT to stay with you. I would imagine you refer to her as a "strong willed child"? That's what my friend does, and I always say "no, she's a child who's allowed to be strong willed"

If my kids run away from me, I refuse to chase them. I use the 1,2,3 method of discipline, and if I get to 3 (which I rarely do), first time they get a time out (I do timeouts EVERYWHERE-no location prevents you from giving a timeout). If they do it again we leave whatever we are doing. After a couple of times of leaving a fun place, they get it. I also cite the rules everytime we go somewhere. The first rule is to ALWAYS be able to see me, and that means I can see them. I tell them that if someeone sees them w/out a mommy, they may take them home with them. This has worked for me because my kids don't run too far from me at all. And when they lose sight of me, they start yelling for me right away (sometimes in stores I hide behind a rack to get their attention).

I saw someone else post that you should let her help you push the cart. Please don't do this, that is extremely dangerous. My son was that age and he was with daddy and ran over to the cart. Right before the cart, he fell down. Most carts have metal spokes on the bottom, and he hit the metal spoke and had to have 3 stiches put in. The hospital was not suprised at all that he needed stiches from falling and hitting the cart spokes. They we suprised that he wasn't pushing the cart at the time though. They told me a lot of parents have their kids help them push the cart, and then the little one trips or falls and they either gash their head open on the metal, or they get their fingers cut off because a parent accidentally runs over them with the cart because it all happens so fast. So, I am not trying to put the person down you mentioned this, I am just trying to share our experience so some other parents don't have to go through what we did.

I had this issue with our older son, and now with our youngest. I learned that I just always hold their hands. My youngest one will try to fall to the ground to get me to let go of his hand, and I just hold it firm and bend down with him (I don't want to pull his arm out of socket). I remain firm and tell him "Alex, you walk" and remain holding his hand the whole time. They will try to resist, but you just need to remain firm, and have patience. It will pass, eventually.

try ignoring her, but still keep an eye on her....personally i think the doggie leashes for kids are horrible. good luck

Bleh - leashes are for animals who cannot be taught to control their impulses. Please don't go that route! It's extremely important that your child be taught how to control her impulses! Actually take the time to practice listening skills with your child so she understands her responsibility. You can try a 3 strikes rule (or even 1 or 2 strikes) where once she 'breaks free' of you a certain number of times that's it - you load up the car and go home. Have solid consequences for not listening to you and (most importantly) follow through. Have the stranger-danger conversation. Make it into a game like others have suggested (stop/go, freeze, etc.).

Take her to the mall and try it out, with the promise of going to the 'playland' at the end of the trip. You can tell her that if she wants to get playland time, she has to stay with you and hold your hand for the trip. If she does not listen to you and runs amok, then no playland for her.

Hi A.,
G. here when my son was 2 he would do the same when he didn't get his way. Or he would just plain out throw himself on the floor and throw a fit. The running was easy to solve. I let him go I kept him in eye site but I didn't chase him and I told him I am leaving see ya later and acted like I was going to the door. In a matter of seconds he was screaming mommy don't leave me and didn't run away from me anymore. Thats when the fits came in. I was at the grocery one day and he wanted a toy I told him I didn't have the money. He threw himself on the floor and started screaming. Everyone was looking at us so I did the same. I got up like nothing ever happened and kept shopping he walked with me without saying a word. When I got to the checkout line one of the people who seen me throw my fit said that they wouldn't bring there kid to the store because he acts up like mine did but now they know how to stop it. Don't know if this will work for you but maybe you can try it. Don't really leave your child just make her think that you will. Have a great day G.

We finally bought one of those harness/leash things for my older son for his own safety. Conventional wisdom says let them run and they will eventually get nervous and turn around to look for you, but - nope, not in his case.

We didn't have to use it much, but I was very glad I had it when I was heavily pregnant and couldn't chase him!

For the most part the comments I got were very positive (and curious) from other parents.

My sister had this problem with my niece, and it continued until she was about 5 years old. My sister talked to a male friend of the family, whom my niece did not know. She arranged for my niece to be grabbed when they went out shopping. She knew my niece would take off, and instead of running after her, she arranged for her friend to come up behind her and grab her. Needless to say, it scared my niece pretty badly. It also gave my sister a chance to explain that bad people could take her quickly, and they would not give her back like her friend had. I know it was extremely harsh, but it worked. To this day, my niece does not go far from my sister, and also tends to watch the people that are around her a little better. I am not saying that this is something you may want to do, but I wanted to let you know that it did work for my sister. Good luck

Try the backpack leash thing...I can't remember what it is called at this moment....Also try this chat room they might have other ideas.... http://www.a-mommys-world.com/chat.php

What about one of those little teddy bear harnesses? I've always said I'd never use one, but if my toddler kept running off I would rethink the decision.
Good Luck:)

Yes, they now have these cute little things for just this reason. http://www.kustommemories.com/index.php?act=viewCat&c...

Good luck.

When my older two were little, we always held their hands. That way, they couldn't run away. Even at 7 and almost 6, they are required to stand right by us when we're out. But the training started when they were small and had to hold out hands.

Basically, it comes down to you and your hubby asserting your authority and being firm. She does not get to choose where the family goes. And you must have that attitude with her. Attitude and hand holding. ;)

They make leashed for toddlers. I know it sounds awful, but it would keep her from running away.

My son was like this too. He just recently grew out of it (to a point) a few months ago and he is 3 1/2. I used to have to hold his hand everywhere we went. And had lots of talks with him about how it is dangerous to run away from Mommy and Daddy and how he could get hurt or lost. A few months ago he just kind of suddenly matured and although he still tries, he actually listens to me when I tell him to stop. I was amazed I could walk through a store with him and not hold his hand and he did ok! Have you tried one of those wrist strap type things to keep her close by? We used that alot in crowded places.

Our son (26 months) does the same thing. He still will try it, but we started playing "Stop"/"Go" at home with him and he's starting to get the hang of "Stop". So, when he starts running away, my DH or I yell, "STOP!" and he at least stops to look back at us. We catch up to him and grab his hand and then say, "Go" so we walk together.

Don't get me wrong, we are still working on it and it doesn't work all the time, but it has helped.

Oh, how familiar I am with this problem! My almost three year old daughter is a huge runner, too. She's on me like a suction cup at home, but the minute we are out she's off like a rocket! It's extremely frustrating, but I have learned that if I let her push the cart at Target, Wal-Mart, etc. then she'll stay by me. The same for at the mall ~ I let her push her umbrella stroller. BUT the novelty of that wears off after about 10-15 minutes. Also, my husband recently came up with yelling "FREEZE!" as she starts running away and surprisingly it works! Good luck!!

don't chase her. stay close enough that you know where she is and can keep an eye on her, but don't chase her. she'll eventually realize you're not going to come after her. by chasing her, you are giving in to what she wants because she knows you won't leave her. if that doesn't work, tell her you will start throwing away some of her favorite toys, whatever those might be. tough love :) sometimes you have to. i'm sure she runs from you because she has learned that it makes you nuts and that's her two-year-old way of rebelling and getting you back for not getting her what she wants. good luck!
p.s. - i have a two and half year old daughter too, whom also is about 40 or more pounds. if she doesn't want to sit in the cart at the store, i let her help me push the cart and help me find the items that we need. it helps a lot. just be careful if you try it because my daughter's not a very good cart driver :)