My daughter has PDD/NOS - High functioning autism and neurologicaly different than other kids...so she is delayed as well.
She is 2 1/2 and we have started the potty training process back when she was 18 months. I tried the whole take her to the potty every 15 - 30 min thing didnt work out. It was more of a chore for her and not fun. She fought me all the way!
Even though she is speech delayed - she only needed to know three words: pee pee, poo poo and potty. Once she had those down we could potty train. I dont need her to tell me...mommy i need to go potty. The one word was enough.
So I took a step back and changed my tatic.
When she would pee pee I would tap the front of her Diaper and say PEE PEE? I think you have Pee Pee lets go change your diaper. Yep you have pee pee alright!
Same for I tap the back and say do you have Poo Poo?
So now she comes to me and taps her diaper front or back and tells me Pee Pee or Poo Poo.
So I walk her to the bathroom and show her where we throw the poo poo. Poo Poo goes in the potty!
I would say its time to go potty! Make it all fun like and dance around! And she puts her potty seat on the potty and sits down and I hand her flash cards or a book. When she is ready to get off i let her get off. I dont push her to stay.
Now she comes to me and says Potty and taps her diaper. Or says poo poo. So we run to the potty and she sits down on the potty and will stay there for a few min.
Of course nothing happends but she is happy about it and then we wash her hands. i tell her good try...
She is now telling me poo poo before she goes and potty. But I have yet to catch it. So i may have to start taking her every few min once she starts to tell me.
MAKE IT FUN!!! NOT A CHORE!
If you force him to stay he wont want to do it. Make it a game and let him get off when he is ready.
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Re the School thing.
I have my daughter in a Mothers Day Out program at a church in NRH. I chose this school because of there flexibility re my child and her delays and special needs.
I asked before signing her into the school about the potty training thing for pre school when she turns three. I made them aware that she is delayed and may not be trained by that time. I asked will they not move her ahead to that class is she is not trained? They said no they would NOT hold her back. Because of her special situation that they will make exceptions for her. That they are here to help the mom and not cause more problems. That every child is different and learns at their own time.
So I am so pleased with this church and their program and will gladly drive the 30 min to her school.
So I would look around and see if you can find a school or church that will make the exception for your son since he has delays.