So, we sent out E-vites to my child's party, which is supposed to be this Friday 7/29 (on her B-day). Today is 7/26. We called several people that we know don't get online very ofter (maybe 2 X's a week). Now I know it's not a great time in the summer for people. However, to date, only 2 people have RSVP'd "Maybe." I know a few more people have have viewed the e-vite, and not responded at all. On Evite dot com it indicates if someone has viewed the invitation, which is kind of nice. I'm just not sure now to handle the situation if no one RSVP's with a "Yes." Do I cancel? Do I go ahead and spend time, energy, and money (the latter 2 of which I have little) even if no one RSVP's "Yes?" My daughter and I have a "back up" plan to do something if no one shows. It turns out a hotel (that has an indoor pool & activity center) where I couldn't afford to get a room is having a Grand Opening with lots of free fun things to do the same evening.
I'm just not sure what to do. Any advise or guidance is greatly appreciated.
~ I did put a deadline. Only 3 ppl had viewed and not responded yet. Out of the 34 email addresses (some were 2 emails per family) I've had 2 respond with a Maybe - for a total of 5 people. 9 No responses after the responses I got earlier today, I had went ahead and sent a personal email that said this: Please respond (in the subject). "Hello, We sent out an Evite invitation to you several days ago. Today we found out sometimes when Evite sends out invitations, they may not land in everyone's email Inbox. Or, maybe you viewed the invitation and forgot to RSVP. So, just in case, we wanted to follow up with you with a personal email. Please take a minute to indicate Yes, No, or Maybe. The highlighted link below will allow you to view all the details. I No reply is fine. However, to assure enough refreshments & supplies are on hand, a response is greatly appreciated. Thanks for time & attention,"
Thank for the encouragement to that. Otherwise I may have waited.
So, I sent out a personal email. No, I did not make 2 dozen phone calls. Then received a couple more No's to the party. I talked with my daughter on Monday or Tuesday about the back-up plan at the Hotel. She was fine with the idea. By late Wednesday evening we had 1 RSVP by phone w/ a Yes, and informed them of our back-up plans. So, late Thursday afternoon we cancelled the party. About 8:30 pm on Thursday, my SIL called to finally RSVP with a surprising yes. Another friend emailed w/ a strong maybe late that night as well, since they were back from a little vacation. Friday, about 1 pm, my younger brother RSVP'd yes. That's my family.
We went to the Hotel Grand Opening celebration. It wasn't a big to do, but fun none the less. There were prizes given away - and several of us won a prize. Face painting, a Bubble car, $1 mixed drinks, some food & snow cones, and live music. There was also a ball drop from a helicopter, which landed. Each ball was a prize. We won a $10 iTune Card. Then a boy asked to trade his prize for tix to the Horse Park. I said OK. It ended up being a 1 night stay at the hotel & tix to the Horse Park. My brother won a $25 gas card, and a drawing for tix to a water park. Attending this event was well worth cancelling the party for. The one parent that emailed us (has 2 girls) was the only one that showed up. Time w/ some family was nice. At 8, we all went to Orange Leaf for some expensive frozen yogurt and enjoyed the brownies my daughter wanted for her birthday. All in all a great time.
Thank you to everyone that responded to my question. I truly appreciate it. As a single mom, it's nice to get well rounded advice from other moms, when I really need it. It meant a lot to me. In fact, I cried a few happy tears when replies started pouring in so quickly. I hope you all enjoy the rest of your summer.
@Yolanda C. We've done traditional invitations via mail in the past. The results weren't much better. Most people did not RSVP. As a disabled single mother of 1 my time & energy is very precious to me. Not to mention the cost of purchasing cards & stamps. I'll consider this route next year, depending on how I'm functioning. Thanks for your thoughts.
I would send another evite reminder ...today. Then call tomorrow all of those who have not responded definitively.
I just don't get people. How rude!
The same thing happened to me. The ones that didn't respond didn't come. I was stuck with so much food and party favors! Plus my kid was sad. I would ditch the party saying too many people were not able to come and go have fun at the hotel!
I would call the ones who have not viewed the invite. This recently happened to me - the evite email was filtered to my spam account. I was so glad the mom called to check and see if we could attend because we always try to make birthdays a priority (and my kids ended up having a great time!).
call the people you invinted and just say that you were wondering if they were going to come to the party because you sent the evites and maybe the got lost in cyber space or something
Call and find out. Sometimes those evites goes to spam. Happy birthday to your daughter!!!
I would call those that have not responded at all and ask if they are planning to attend so you can plan accordingly. Then go forward with those that have said they are coming...I would never cancel the party...not fair to your child.
Did you have a deadline on the RSVPs? You might send a reminder evite, just in case people wanted to check with their calendar, husband, etc. Make sure you let them know you need to know for sure by whatever time you want to know by. And, let them know that a "no" is okay, but you just need to know for planning purposes. If you don't have any yes responses by, say Thursday morning, send another notice saying that the party has been cancelled due to lack of rsvps. If someone wanted to come, they will have learned that they needed to let you know. People are rude about rsvping. It is so easy to let them slide and never get back to them, especially if you think you have a couple of weeks to get to it.
I would send them a reminder email. If there are some who have not viewed your evite, they may not have gotten it for some reason. That happened to me when I sent out an evite for my daughter's party. Send them a regular email or call them.
I would send an email to everyone with a "please respond" message and a link to the evite.
I would call everyone. I have two kids born in July and having a birthday
party was always a problem because everyone was away. The fact that
you have a back up plan is great so your daughter will not be disappointed.
Have a fun day whichever way it goes.
This is tricky because people don't RSVP anymore which is so rude. Top that off with EVite and it can be a pain! The problem with EVite is as people have said, the emails can go to spam. Also another friend recently mentioned it doesn't seem to bounce back emails if they go to an invalid address or aren't delivered so the organizer doesn't know the emails were never delivered. Email just isn't as reliable as it should be. All this makes it so difficult to plan a party.
What I would do is email outside of the EVite system right away letting them know you want to make sure they saw the EVite and you are asking for an RSVP in a nice short way. Then call those that don't respond by tomorrow moring. UGH! This was supposed to save you time, right? Anyway, you'll get a better picture of what is actually happening and I hope it ends up being what you and your daughter want as plan B sounds fun too. ;-).
While I agree it **seems** like it would not be fair to your daughter to cancel, if time, effort, and money are precious, I would go ahead and cancel, making excuses for others to your child (dependent upon her age). We've done birthday parties where we invite 30 ppl, no one RSVP's and only one child shows up - and it is beyond hurtful to a child. My child would have been much less hurt if we had just canceled, suggested that too many ppl had previous obligations, etc, and planned something else. It's a choice between a bad situation and a REALLY bad situation. For my child it would have meant "my parents are stupid and don't know what they're doing, and why would they cancel my party if some people can't come because other people were going to show up!' versus "Nobody likes me. I must be a total loser." I would much rather my child be mad at me in a place I can reach than hurt in a place I can't reach him.
If you have a sensitive child at all, or if she shuts down and won't talk when she's hurt, I would definitely recommend canceling. Ultimately, keep in mind that you still have to do what's best for your family and if spending alot of time, money, and effort when only two people *may* show up isn't it then I would go another direction.
For some reason people do not know the meaning of RSVP. Most think you're only suppose to respond if you are coming. You don't mention how many have viewed the e-vites, but not responded. Did you give a deadline? You may want to send a follow up or give them a call.
You also mentioned that many people don't get on-line much. Just currious, why even send them e-vites? Personally, I wouldn't respond to them.
People just don't RSVP and when people doing invitation finally realize that everyone will be much happier.
I say plan a party with people you know and are friends with then you talk to them all the time and will know if they are coming or not.
As for this one I'd say go ahead and have the party and if no one show up then just have it with whoever is there. If you don't spend lots of money on a totally huge cake and gallons of ice cream then you aren't losing any money.
I'm sorry to all who said "people don't RSVP". But..... E-vites are not the way to go, especially for a child's birthday party. We have parties May - August and I always let my kids to their invitations to family and friends and 95% always show up. I just think that the e thing is taking out the personal part of inviting someone to a party. I feel if you can take the time to sit down and write out and use snail mail, I can take the time to RSVP.
It has been my expierence that for some reason people don't feel that they need to RSVP anymore. I think it's rude when people don't and then show up. I would send out an reminder and call just to confirm and tell them that you need to know so that you can make sure there is plenty to eat/drink ect. I usually just assume people are coming and go ahead with things as planned and we always have a great time no matter who shows up or not.
I hate to tell you this, but people do not RSVP anymore. I know it is rude, but it is a reality. After planning a party for 25 kids and having only 3 kids show (we estimated the party cost us 90/per kid!!), I decided to change my expectations.
If you have the means, I would call them and ask. Otherwise, perhaps you can prepare refreshments that you don't have to waste if people don't show (bagged items/powdered lemonade, frozen items that cook in less than 15 minutes).
On the flip side, when i had my sister's baby shower, I asked for people to RSVP with regrets only, which is risking since people don't even RSVP when they are NOT going to show. in this case I didn't get a single call and everyone showed up. You just never know anymore....
Good luck!!
My opinion....
I would uninvite everyone and let them know that instead of going to .....we decided to do ...... and we'd love it if you could join us. That "decided to do" item could be something conveninet like a backyard BBQ with a rented slide that would end up costing you less. Then if no one shows, you'll still have fun. People don't RSVP much anymore. Not sure why but it really makes it hard when you're trying to plan. Have fun!
