How to Get My 7 Month Old to Fall Asleep on His Own, Etc.

This may not be politically correct, but I rocked my daughter to sleep until she was around 18 months old. Partially because I was away from her all day and that was some of my evening with her. I may have just gotten lucky, but it only took a few nights letting her cry before she was going to bed with no problems. She was older and I think she could understand what was happening- that it was time to sleep. She sort of "got it". I say, do what works and if he is not able to go to sleep on his own yet, give him a few months and try again. There is no set rule for every child, in my opinion. Oh and she is now 6 and bedtime is not a problem, at all. It is good night and she is fine.

Your not alone there are I think two main ways to deal with this as I have read many moms write in and my own experience.

The first way is to put baby into crib rock, sing, stroke hair ( things that comfort) maybe a teddy bear to lean against, and then wait for baby to go to sleep.

The second is to make sure baby is dry, feed, no fever ...
allow baby to cry, it sounds really mean but babys are way smarter then we often give them credit. I believe early on a baby earns that if I cry, they will pick me up and the same is true with sleep time.

My first child had this problem, he would cry and of course I picked him up. After awhile I was not getting much slep and that is when mom told me its ok for a baby to cry sometimes so long as there is nothing wrong. I gave her this shocked look,but hate to say mom was right. After a few days we where sleeping a least six hours. I added a night light by Fisher Price the kind with little fish, that projected to the ceiling and played soothing sounds.

However, second baby (Ryan) had colic and cried a lot so niether method worked....the best thing to do in sum is to sleep when you can...eventually they grow out of it

Good luck and hope this was helpful

p.s. also a swing

Well, your letting him know that you will eventually come in and get him. So, of course he's not going to settle down without you. I would start letting him cry a little longer each time. Then don't pick him up when you do go in. Just pat him on the back and give him a blankie (we use a small burp cloth) or pacifier and let him use them for comfort. I have 6 month old and he is sleeping through the night (8 PM to 7:30 AM) and finally started taking good naps (1 hour or more) at about 4 1/2 months. I followed this pattern with him and never rocked him or held him until he fell asleep. I'm not bragging, because this was extreemely difficult. It isn't easy to listen to the crying at first. But, after a few rough days and nights, it does get better. The crying gets less and less. Now my son doesn't cry at all. We did the same thing when my 2 year old was a baby and she's a great sleeper too. Now, that doesn't mean that you won't have bad days. When they are teething or learning something new their schedule gets off for a day or two. You just have to struggle through it knowing it won't last.

Every mom has to decide what she thinks is right for her child about letting them cry it out or not. I thought I would just share my experience with you. I let my daughter nurse to sleep until she was 11 months old. She would wake during the night many times and nurse back to sleep. I was advised by her pedi to stop doing that at 6 months because supposedly at that age they could learn to self soothe and that after that is age is when bad habits developed. But we were living with other people at that time and I didn't want her crying to bother them. So one week while she was 11 months old we had the house to ourselves and I decided it was time. I started with naptime that first day and made sure she was really full from eating and really tired and had a clean diaper. That way I knew in my mind that she was just crying because I wasn't holding her. I tried going in a few times but that only seemed to get her more upset. So then I would look in on her without her seeing me until she finally fell asleep. Everyone had told me the nursing was just a habit but I was worried that she was hungry. So that first night I tried to bottle feed her 2 times. Both times she only drank an ounce and then pushed it away. I knew then that it was just habit and not hunger. After the first night, I didn't pick her up anymore when she was crying. The first 3 days were very hard on both of us. After that she stopped crying for as long before she fell asleep and stopped waking up so much at night. Now about a month and a half later she only cries for about 1-5 minutes when I lay her down for a nap or at bedtime. She sleeps through the night and her naps last anywhere from 1-3 hours. Now she only takes 1 nap a day. I understand the teething part because she is just now getting her first tooth at 13 months old but I don't want to undo all the progress we have made with the sleeping. But she seems to be a much happier baby and I think that is because she is getting better sleep during the night and at naps. If I have another baby, I will definately start doing this around 6 months of age. I hope some of this helps but keep in mind you have to do what you feel is best for you and your baby.

I can totally relate to your concerns about your son not being able to comfort himself to sleep at night. I made the mistake of not letting my daughter "cry it out" when she was your son's age. She is now 4 1/2 and still needs us to snuggle her in bed so she can fall asleep. It's not so bad now because we enjoy the time we get to spend with her and it's part of our night time routine. I am 8 months pregnant with our second child and my hubby and I have vowed not to do the same with the baby, however. It is very important for them to learn to soothe themselves to sleep. We just found it unbearable to listen to our daughter's cries, so we would go in and stay with her until she fell asleep. That said, my advice to you is let your son cry it out. It is going to be tough for you and your family the first few days, but rest assured he will eventually fall asleep on his own. I hope this has helped. Best of luck to you.

I am sure you will get lots of advice on different methods, the trick I think is to be consisent. I did this with both my boys around a year. Another trick is to get someone else to put him to bed too. However this can backfire if say your husband isn't around every night. For be we did bath, a book and singing and then good night. It took a bit of crying and a little while but once we were consistent with the routine they go to bed without a fuss.

Nap times differ from child to child and naturally shorten as children get older. Also, a teething baby will want more comfort because they are in almost constant pain. When you hold your child, you aren't instilling bad habits; you are providing them with comfort, and letting them feel your love for them. Don't stop holding your baby!

T.,
I know this probably goes in the face of conventional wisdom, ie letting them cry it out, but here goes :). Pick him up, nurse him. Think about when you are sick or in pain. Don't you want someone to "baby" you? You have learned coping skills as an adult, your baby is still a baby. He needs you. And getting teeth in is quite painful. I struggled with the pacifier issue for the longest, do I throw it away or not, then I had an older parent remind me that she has never seen a bride walking down the aisle with one. I thought that was pretty funny and she is right. The only reason we are concerned with "bad habits" is because society, family and friends tell us their opinions. Do what is best for your family and your sanity. Good luck!

Hi T.,
If you looking for a more gentle method of getting your little to learn to go to sleep on his own, there is a wonderful book called "The No Cry Sleep Solution" and it is a wonderful gentle way of teaching your children how to go to sleep on their own and still being able to address their needs without leaving them there to cry it out.

Get the book "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" by Richard Ferber, M.D. I was resistant to try this method at first because I'd heard it described as the "cry it out" method and I didn't think I could bear that. It is not nearly as bad as it sounds once you read it all and understand the process. I read through the first part of this book and did exactly what it said step-by-step and it worked the first night and my daughter's gone to sleep on her own and slept through the night every night since. I told a friend about it and it worked immediately for her son too. Hope this helps!

Hi,...i dont think your instilling bad habits- not yet anyway- he is still young.... I breast fed my son until he was only 3 months old, he basically never fell asleep on his own until he was about 6 or 7 months old- but he was usually in a playpen while he was in a room with me and my family rather than all alone (that seemed to help)... he never felt like he was alone. In the middle of the night though i still rock him back to sleep when he wakes up at 3am and he is 15 months old.
Maybe try that for awhile turn the lights off with just a night light or something (set the mood) put him in his playpen/pack n play or his crib but stay in the room with him, to make him feel comforted- maybe rub his back.Even try to put some lullaby music on- my son loves that.....i hope this helps! good luck.