One thing you could try (and if it doesn't work yet, try again in a month or two) is to give your baby milk in a sippy cup. I have three boys, all breast fed, all of whom took a bottle (except that the first one went on a permanent bottle strike at 7 months, but before that he had a bottle two days a week while I was at work). My younger two boys took sippy cups quite early on, and although they would still use a bottle, the sippy cup was easier because they could hold it themselves, and that also kept them entertained. Also, we didn't bother warming up the milk. Clearly, my kids didn't have difficulty taking bottles, but you could experiment with the temperature of the milk. Maybe if the milk is cold and iin a sippy cup it will seem so different from the usual thing that your baby will think it really is something different and won't mind that you're not involved. It's worth a shot!
As for holding the baby or not, my husband would often not hold our boys, and it always bothered me, so I would ask him to please hold the baby while feeding him. Somehow the multitasking while baby feeding (my husband would often be at the computer or doing some other activity while holding the bottle with one hand) really irked me. It was probably a combination of feeling like our baby should have some interaction (but it's not like my husband didn't interact with him a lot at other times) and jealousy that I can't multitask and nurse as easily. I am not sure the baby really minded, though; I think it was just me! If your husband gets your baby to drink the bottle that way, then I say leave well enough alone.