How to Get Breastfed Baby to Take Bottle

Updated on June 29, 2010
S.T. asks from Scarborough, ME
10 answers

I am a SAHM who is breastfeeding and my son is now five months old and up to now he has refused the bottle. I just don't know how to get him to take it. My husband has tried to feed him breastmilk and also formula with no luck. He has tried different bottles as well, again with no luck. I am not home when my husband tries the bottle (because people have told me the baby can smell me and will refuse the bottle if I'm there). We had taken a break from trying the bottle but are ready to try again. The last couple of times my husband tried the bottle I was out at night, my son woke up and my husband tried to give our son the bottle. I just asked him last night how he holds the baby when giving the bottle and he responded that he doesn't hold him. My husband said he read online that the bestway to get a baby who wont take a bottle when he wakes up at night is to hold the bottle for him but don't take him out of his crib. I have never heard of this and was actually quite upset at this concept. I always felt that babies need to be held for feedings. Has anyone successfully got a resistant baby to take the bottle? Any advice or words of wisdom would be really appreciated. This situtation has me feeling like I can't be away from my baby for any amount of time!

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J.S.

answers from Boston on

I had the same problem with my daughter and was worried I wouldn't be able to go back to work from maternity leave. I had the EXACT same experience as a previous post - we tried a million different bottles but the first one she would take was the Playtes drop ins with the LATEX, not the silicone, nipple.

Good luck!

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K.D.

answers from Dallas on

I understand that the way your hubby fed baby the bottle might seem 'cold' but a breastfed baby many times will not take a bottle from anyone that holds him. When hes held he expects the breast, and anything else just will not do. So if that feeding worked for your husband maybe thats just the way it has to be. Just make sure he burps baby afterward.

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L.O.

answers from Boston on

Hi. I had this problem with my youngest - who is now 8 years old - so I'm going to be testing my memory with how we did it. But I had to actually take an extra month's maternity leave in order to work on this and get her to take a bottle. She actually had been taking a bottle occasionally, but we went on vacation and when we came back she refused - a lactation consultant told me that can be very normal that when a baby is upset by changes in routine. In any event, it was horrible. I couldn't stand the "let her cry it out, she'll get hungry enough" method. And my husband had zero luck with me out of the house. So this is what I did - it took a long time, I warn you. First, I searched high and low for the nipples that best matched MY personal nipple shape. Second, I would put Lansinoh (spelling? it's a brand of lanolin lotion for breastfeeding) on my nipples and also on the bottle nipples. In the beginning, I'd breastfeed her, and when she started getting groggy and falling asleep - I'd do the quick switcheroo. In the beginning, she'd kind of get startled and realize there was a difference, so I'd switch the bottle in for only a second or two, and then put my nipple right back in. Eventually it desensitized her slightly to the difference in the nipple. Then I'd try the old switcheroo, but just leave the bottle in a bit longer. She'd maybe take 1 or 2 sips and then cry. But we just kept trying longer and longer. The next day, maybe 3 or 4 sips. After about 3 weeks of that, we tried someone else with me still nearby. Then eventually we moved to someone trying it with me gone - at that point she finally drank .5 ounce from the bottle - I remember I was so elated. Of course, the whole time, we had breastmilk in the bottle - I don't think you want to try any kind of switching to formula at this point. It will only complicate things, which are already complicated. I'll also warn you - I found out that a baby that can be this stubborn has an amazing amount of self control and stubborness. It can serve them well - they can really, really, hold out for what they want in life. But it can sure be frustrating for the parent. Oh - I have never heard of not holding the baby. I cannot imagine how that helps in the least. They want comfort when they are feeding. I think anything that gut instinct tells you isn't going to work for you probably is not going to work. Best wishes.

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K.L.

answers from Boston on

Hi S.,

I was in a similar situation with my son. He breastfed for 4 months and always refused a bottle. I was getting really worried because he was to be starting part-time daycare and I thought he wouldn't ever get it. I tried different nipples, different people, etc. We offered him breastmilk and formula. But he resisted. Finally the day came when daycare started and I was a wreck. He did hold out for quite a while, but the woman caring for him was patient and kept offering and he finally took it. I think he just got hungry enough that he took it.

I think when we were at home we just couldn't handle the crying. In all likelihood he will initially not take a bottle from you, that's probably a given. But if you could find somebody else who is comfortable around kids and wouldn't be stressed out by your son's crying and who could be persistent and loving with offerning the bottle, that may be your best chance. As it turned out my son completely refused breast milk in a bottle and would only drink formula. When he was given a bottle, he would be held facing out, so he could see other kids around him - maybe a bit more distracted that way. At home I couldn't hold him and give him a bottle but I could sit him up in a bouncy seat and he would take a bottle and eventually I was able to hold him.

Just keep trying differnt approaches. They are all different. And when he's crying just remember he's just mad -- he wants the good stuff! :-) You are doing a great job! Hang in there!

K.

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M.K.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

I hope when your husband feeds the baby in the crib that he is not laying flat on his back. This can cause choking and aspiration into the lungs. If he is not going to hold him then the baby needs to be propped up somehow. A baby nursing from the breast is very different from a baby nursing from a bottle and he shouldn't lay on his back to receive the bottle. Have you tried different bottles? This is going to sound weird but try to rub the bottle nipple on yourself to make it smell like you.

J.G.

answers from San Antonio on

My son was not resistant to the bottle, but when anyone other than me (the SAH breastfeeding mom) fed him a bottle, they always held him. We always did breastmilk, and we used the Medela bottles & nipples, although I noticed that Evenflow nipples looked exactly the same. Make sure the 'flow' you get is the right flow for what he needs. Maybe warm the nipple up to soften it? I often tried one feeding a day to be a bottle, so that my son would be used to it if I went out for dinner or a drs visit. He wouldn't always take it from others. Often, he'd take it from me only, as that's what he got used to. He's probably just like the rest of us humans - resistant to change and liking things the way they are. Good luck!

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E.M.

answers from Boston on

My daughter never took a bottle, and my son took it well in the beginning, and then refused it completely! It made me a nervous wreck! What I discovered was that we had my husband try giving him the bottle when he came home from work, and what we also found out was that at bedtime (which it was for my baby son) he wanted nothing to do with a bottle at bedtime - he just wanted me. What finally worked was for me to give him a bottle during the day, when he was fresher and not so tired. I put him in his bouncy seat (so it was different from nursing) and he would take it OK around noon. When my husband had to give him a bottle, he would put the baby in the bjorn and face him out - movement seemed to really help. With my daughter we tried all different kinds of b ottles and nipples, with my son, I just used the Dr. Brown's bottles, but I did have to try different flow nipples - what worked for my baby was the level 3 nipple, so he didn't have to work hard at all.

He hardly ever had bottles (I am a SAHM), maybe once every other week or so - but when he sees one, he goes right for it!

Just keep trying different things, and if you can find one, a good lactation consultant can be a good source of support for you during this stressful time!

Good LUck!
E.

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C.A.

answers from New London on

Some kids refuse every bottle ever tried and will just refuse. My 5 month old daughter also refused a bottle for a while. Have you tried with different temperatures. I found my daughter was picky about the bottle, but also the temperature. I was finally able to get her to take the Breastflow bottle by The First Years. I bought just one bottle for about $5 at Target and she took it right away. Other than trying different bottles and different temperatures, you can only keep trying and trying. He may or may not ever take to one. I definitely feel for you feeling like you can't leave him. My daughter just started taking her bottle and many times I had to say no to friends b/c I couldn't take her or leave her. It is very frustrating! Good luck!

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E.G.

answers from Boston on

I just went through the same thing with my 10 week old. She had taken the occasional bottle just fine, but two weeks before I had to return to work she just refused. She would scream and scream and even went 7 hours without eating, just holding out for the good stuff. It would really worry me. I too would leave the house just to have my husband feed her to eliminate my presence/smell from the house, tried using a little blanket pal with my breastmilk on it for comfort and tried many different kinds of bottles. The one bottle that finally worked for me is the Playtex Dropins with the LATEX nipple. It was the latex that did it, just a different feel and my daughter realized that she liked to bite and chew on it. It's a little softer than the silicone version.

And please don't get too upset with your husband. One of the suggestions for getting a stubborn baby to take a bottle is to try giving it to them when they are in a baby chair or crib because they won't associate this position with breastfeeding. He was only trying to help. My husband and I tried the same thing.

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K.E.

answers from Boston on

One thing you could try (and if it doesn't work yet, try again in a month or two) is to give your baby milk in a sippy cup. I have three boys, all breast fed, all of whom took a bottle (except that the first one went on a permanent bottle strike at 7 months, but before that he had a bottle two days a week while I was at work). My younger two boys took sippy cups quite early on, and although they would still use a bottle, the sippy cup was easier because they could hold it themselves, and that also kept them entertained. Also, we didn't bother warming up the milk. Clearly, my kids didn't have difficulty taking bottles, but you could experiment with the temperature of the milk. Maybe if the milk is cold and iin a sippy cup it will seem so different from the usual thing that your baby will think it really is something different and won't mind that you're not involved. It's worth a shot!

As for holding the baby or not, my husband would often not hold our boys, and it always bothered me, so I would ask him to please hold the baby while feeding him. Somehow the multitasking while baby feeding (my husband would often be at the computer or doing some other activity while holding the bottle with one hand) really irked me. It was probably a combination of feeling like our baby should have some interaction (but it's not like my husband didn't interact with him a lot at other times) and jealousy that I can't multitask and nurse as easily. I am not sure the baby really minded, though; I think it was just me! If your husband gets your baby to drink the bottle that way, then I say leave well enough alone.

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