How to Discuss Having Your Period (Menstration) with a 7Yo 2Nd Grader?

Updated on January 16, 2014
T.M. asks from Huntsville, AL
13 answers

My DD is 7yo and in second grade. She has seen tampon dispensers in public bathrooms and has been with me when I buy tampons at the store and has been asking what it is used for. A generic answer that it is for older girls is not cutting it. We have always been very matter-of-fact with her about things, but I'm pretty sure that if I explain to her in even the most basic way, it will freak her out, especially with the term "bleeding." I would prefer she get this info from me instead of elsewhere, but I'm at a loss as to how to explain this in an age-appropriate, non-threatening way. How/when did you discuss getting your period with a young girl?

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So What Happened?

Thanks to all of you who offered conversion hints, books, and other constructive advice! I wanted to be straight-forward and honest and your tips really helped. I took a matter-of-fact and casual approach starting the conversation when taking some tampons out of the closet to put in the bathroom starting with "Hey, you know how you asked me what that machine was for in the bathroom? It holds these." I explained the process, and ended by saying that people usually refer to it as "bleeding," but it's not like having an open cut that doesn't stop bleeding so it's not bad or scary or dangerous. (This was the part I was worried about her freaking out about.) I stressed that it was perfectly normal and that it didn't hurt and that it was really a good thing because that meant that a teen/adult woman's body was working correctly. She was totally fine with it!

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B.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

Great question! I learned early on to ask my kids, "what do you want to know about that?" and let them lead the discussion.
EX: Hey Mommy, that is that machine for?
mommy: it is a tampon dispenser
Kid: what is it for?
Mommy: when women get older they menstruate.
Kid: what does that mean?
Mommy: it is a step of growing up.
Kid: will i menstruate?
Mommy: Yes
Kid: When?
Mommy: when it's time. I will help you when it's time.
Kid: okay
That usually covers it!

Let her lead you!

B.

8 moms found this helpful

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

My daughter walked into the bathroom while I was changing a tampon when she was four and thought I was hurt when she saw the blood.
I simply explained that the blood wasn't from a wound, that every month a woman's body made endometrium, a special sort of nesting material inside for a baby to grow, but if a baby didn't grow, then the woman's body got rid of the nest and started a new one. She asked why the nest was made of blood, and I told her that blood is how your body carries everything it needs from one place to another - water, food, even oxygen. That was extra blood to carry food, water, and oxygen to a baby, but since there was no baby, I didn't need the extra blood.

7 moms found this helpful

K.A.

answers from San Diego on

My kids have known from an early age what a period is and what a tampon is for. I've had to send them to the other bathroom more than once before to get me some when I didn't realize there were none under the counter in the bathroom I'm in. I've had them in the stall with me when in public bathrooms so they've seen me need to take care of things.
I told then that when you become an adult or an older teen your body starts practicing and making itself ready to make and grow a baby. Once a month a lady's body makes extra blood that's used to help grow a baby. If a baby isn't there then that extra blood comes out and you use a tampon like a bandaid to keep it from getting all over everything and being messy. I always stress that I am not hurt in any way. That it doesn't hurt (I am leaving out trying to explain menstrual cramps as it's just not worth it). And that it is extra blood that I do not need at all.
It never freaked out any of my 3.

7 moms found this helpful
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D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My son just turned 8. He has known since he is about 5-6 that women old enough to have babies have bleeding from their vaginas every month. It is because their bodies get ready to have a baby and when that doesn't happen the uterine lining is shed. Yup, he knows the terms uterus and lining. Why would your daughter freak out? My son also knows it doesn't hurt.

6 moms found this helpful
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A.R.

answers from Dallas on

I Highly recommend the American Girl book Care and Keeping of You.
http://www.amazon.com/Care-Keeping-You-Valorie-Schaefer-e...

Explains puberty, including menstruation, in easy age appropriate terms. My daughter read it when she was 7-8 years old.

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R.K.

answers from Appleton on

I am sure there are books at the library for you to read either with or without your daughter.

It's not really a big deal, it's a normal bodily function, just explain in simple terms. I advise you to find a way to do this soon. I have 2 grandaughters now 13 and 11.5 yrs old. The older one started her periods at 10 and the younger at 9.5 yrs old.

Even though I am through menapause I keep tampons and pads in the drawer in the bathroom. I showed the girls where they are and told them if they need them use them. If the supply runs low let me know.

6 moms found this helpful

S.A.

answers from Chicago on

I think you should keep it simple. I took that approach with my daughter when she was 7-8 and started asking.

I said something like "Girls and women have a little bit of bleeding from the vagina each month. It's nothing to worry about, and it's normal. You wear a pad for a few days until it goes away."

If your daughter is satisfied, and doesn't ask why, just leave it at that. If she does you can say "This happens so that when a girl grows up and gets married, she can have a baby."

You might want to have a book on hand to help explain things further if she asks a lot of questions. I used It's Not the Stork by Robie H. Harris and Michael Emberley. It is a great resource. You can and should preview it first and pick and choose which pages you want to show her, and how much you want to expound on the information.

2 moms found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I think she should be getting a more thorough answer from you or she will go elsewhere to get the answer.

You answer has been for older girls. Well, 3rd graders are older girls mom. Think about it from her perspective.

You don't have to describe the 'bleeding" as something to be scared of.

Quite honestly, right now in 2nd grade, she has heard much more than you think she has. I suggest some open and honest communication which is matter of fact so she understands. It is not threatening to have open lines of communication with no topic off limits, unless it threatens you somehow.

My daughter is 19 and when she asked the question LONG ago, less than age 5, I just answered her appropriately.

If you have an issue with speaking so candidly with your daughter, then go on a drive so you are not looking at her and if that is not doable, invest in some books so she can learn.

It is scary at all the info that the children speak about while at school regarding sex, STD, bleeding, etc. You DO want you daughter to trust you enough to come to you for the answers.

Best wishes mom... they grow up way to fast

2 moms found this helpful
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O.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

I always told my son that they were personal hygiene items for grown women.

1 mom found this helpful
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R.M.

answers from San Francisco on

What Katrina and Dana K. said.

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J.C.

answers from New York on

My daughter never leaves me along in the bathroom so on occasion, she will see blood. When she was about 4, I explained to her that this needs to happen so that women can one day have a baby. It makes the body ready to grow a baby. She's 7.5 as well - I know more questions are on the horizon but it's a good start. And it's true.

1 mom found this helpful

I.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

since you are stumped, I'd look into a good book to read to her about her body. Mine were asking about this since they were three, so we never had to deal with it being awkward.

1 mom found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

God made a special way for mom's to have babies, this is part of that. When you're older I will explain it all to you. Right now we're just going to call this girl stuff and be done with it.

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