Brief background. 6 or so years ago I had heavy bleeding and all sorts of issues. Doc said we could do a hysterectomy and I said no, I would like to have more children. I had 2 more kids (we have a total of 3). I went back after last baby, and I asked if she could just do a hysterectomy, she said no let’s try hormones to get you in order, I am too young to have this removed.
We decided to talk to another doctor to get a second opinion. We found them to have a little bit more information on how to treat what is going on, My husband and I both agreed that the new doctor seemed inviting, warm and acted concerned. We thought my regular doctor whom I have had for over 8 yrs is over worked.
Three years later I am still having issues. I had a period from April 23 till May 29 (No kidding). Called my doctor and she prescribed hormones to get things in order. She is really good though, she has a lot of book smarts, but lacks in the personable side, I think because she is so smart. I went back to my regular doctor because she would see me when I had my 4 week long period, and she is trying to talk me into doing the IUD for treatment of heavy periods, but no guarantee it will work. She said she would do a hysterectomy but with me being overweight recovery will be longer. (URG)
I went in for a ultrasound, then a week later a biopsy to make sure she is aware of what is going on in there. When I went to the biopsy appointment she had a emergency at the hospital, and told me that she could rush through the biopsy, but could not consult with me, since I was undressed in the room and was there. I agreed, she was rough and in a hurry, did the procedure and left. As she stated. Said she would call me three days later to consult, and that the next week she would be out all week. No call and the nurse called to give results of a normal biopsy report. I still don’t know if we are going to do the IUD or surgery. (Added note: I went to her 4 yrs ago for a IUD for prevention of pregnancy and she had to run out for an emergency at hospital- rescheduled a few weeks later, ended up pregnant with my last child.)
FOR my question. Would you see the new doctor, or stick with the one who knows your history?
Your insurance and you are paying for their time, so I say go to the new Dr..
If you truly value your old MD and want to continue to be a patient of hers, write her a brief letter and politely, but firmly, relay your concerns about her lack of communication, rushing around and how you feel ____________ (fill in the blank) about being treated that way. Then say you want to remain her patient but this is a serious matter to you and you want a call back from her within ___ (2, 4, 6, days) to discuss this. If she doesn't call you back or blows you off, call her office and say that you are discontinuing your care there and to please forward your records to the new MD.
If you are tired of getting blown off by this gal and are just ready to be done with it, again, write her a brief and firm but polite letter. Tell her what you are doing and why you are doing it and state that although you are leaving her care that your thoughts and observations will hopefully improve her bedside manner for her other patients, and thank you for the care over the years.
It amazes me how often people receive unsatisfactory care from their doctors and yet they do nothing about it. If you were treated that way by your hairstylist, you'd find another one. I know that sometimes options are limited by things like location and insurance, but in your case OB's are generally a dime a dozen - and so are patients. So take care of yourself and make sure that you feel like you're getting good care - and feel free to stand up for yourself!!! People also don't realize that you don't have to be a bi*$&h to make a point. Taking just a minute to say, "I understand that you're busy, but I don't feel like my medical needs are being met and I'd appreciate it if you could pause for just a second and tell me exactly how and when we can get this taken care of so I can feel better about it."
Good luck mama!!
((BTW - after getting my Mirana IUD my periods have practically stopped and this is after having a baby and having years of irregular cycles. Woo hoo!))
Even if you loved this doctor, I would always recommend getting a second opinion for a decision of this magnitude. There's no going back after this surgery, so it can't hurt to make absolutely sure it's necessary.
I'm sorry, but I find it unacceptable for doctors to treat patients with such little care and personal attention. I don't care how smart they are and I don't care for healthcare being treated as a business instead of a personal care area. They spend so much time in their world that they forget the average person doesn't understand everything about their situation or the implications of certain decisions. We're talking about our BODIES - we have every right to try to educate ourselves about how to make the best decisions ALONG WITH our healthcare providers, not just mindlessly agree to something just because of one person's interpretation of the situation. If they treat you insolently or seem offended by your wanting to get another opinion, they are being arrogant. If they have your best interest at heart, they will be supportive of that decision.
Please remember that there is plenty of room for human error in the medical field, so there is certainly no harm in having another's evaluation.
"In the abundance of counselors there is wisdom."
Best of luck to you.
I would go with a new doctor. Sounds like yours is has not had your best interest in mind along with a too busy practice.
You are right. It takes a lot of smarts to be a doctor. Unfortunately a personable bedside manner is not a requirement. It seems to be a rare and special thing when you can find an understanding, easy to talk to, supportive doctor that is also up-to-date, efficient, and effective at treating you, whether it be for a routine appointment or for something more specific. If you like the new doctor that you saw for the second opinion, and feel comfortable in her knowledge and expertise as well as with her bedside manner, then I would encourage you to switch. You can request a copy of your medical records, in it's entirety, be sent to the new doctor so that she can review your history. Don't stay with the same doctor just because you've been there so long. Some people don't mind a doctor who isn't into small talk and that rushes through appointments and who doesn't call you back. Some people need more from their doctor, and you should find the one that works for you!
Dear T,
You have posted a number of times about this situation. My advice to you has been and continues to be: seek another opinion from a specialized physician. I realize you live near Pittsburgh, so seeking a highly regarded reproductive endocrinologist in the Philadelphia-area seems unlikely (although women have traveled much farther to receive the care they deserve - believe me). However, if you are willing to travel for an appointment with a stellar doctor, Dr. Michael Glassner of MainLine Fertility is one of the nation's best. Another well-regarded Philadelphia-based specialist is Dr. Jay Goldberg of the Jefferson Fibroid Center at Jefferson University Hospital. In Pittsburgh, you still have options as well - UPMC Maggee-Women's Hospital, for example. I know other women have mentioned Uterine Artery Embolization to you as an alternative to surgery, so it's worth discussing with a skilled Interventional Radiologist (one who has been performing the procedure for many years with a good track record - and university hospitals are a great place to find such skilled physicians). I hope you're able to find a doctor you like and trust. Good bedside manner can be hard to come by. I suspect it's not something they teach in medical school. While it would be nice to feel like you have a personal connection with your doctor, to feel as if he or she really cares about your situation, its not something you can always find. Nevertheless, disregarding patients concerns or initiation of communication is reckless, I think. I hope, again, that you will seek another opinion and request information regarding ALL of the options available to you, so you can research for yourself to decide what is the best decision for you and your body. Good luck!
Just because they are busy does not mean it is okay to ignore the patient. Ask for a complete copy of your file and find a new doctor. Then have the new doctor call for your records as well. At your first visit be super detailed about your full history.
Best Wishes!
New doctor. This one sounds like an idiot.
Have you considered an endometrial ablation (NovaSure) to control the heavy periods? I think that would be a better way to go than a full hysterectomy. It's an outpatient procedure, and not that big a deal, from what I've heard, with very good results.
I hate too much tinkering around with hormones...I don't think the IUD is really the answer, unless you want to use it as birth control after the NovaSure thing.
Donna... you really think a male doc is automatically better? Puhleeze...
See another Dr please. You are not getting the time, attention or respect you deserve. Times are tough for healthcare providers as they are having to see more patients to pay the bills. The state of the economy is affecting everyone. That being said, you need someone to really work with you on our dysfunctional uterine bleeding. Best wishes for finding a great Dr. They are out there--just gotta keep looking till you find one. Nurse Midwife Mom
IMO, you should always get a second opinion when you are considering surgery. You can have the 2nd doctor request a copy of all your medical records from your first doctor, so they can see your history (and when one doc send directly to another, they usually do it without charge. If you ask for the copy, they can charge you). As another poster mentioned, you are near Pittsburgh. An option might be the Midlife Center at Magee hospital. The doctors in the center specialize in this type of issue. You can find information on it if you google it.
Update - I just re-read this, and realize that you already had a second opinion with a different doctor who you liked better. Definitely stick with the new doctor then. The previous doctor will be able to understand your history by discussing it with you and also from your records.
NEW DOCTOR!!! old one seems like a quack
Hi, T:
Go get a third opinion.
Have your list of issues you are dealing with currently.
Is your uterus enlarged?
Are all the products of conception out of your uterus?
What are your hormone blood levels (alll of them)?
Have you thought about getting a male doc?
Good luck.
D.
