How Do I Get My 21 Month Old off the Bottle?

Updated on April 05, 2008
J.C. asks from Lahaina, HI
27 answers

My daughter will be turning 2 in June and I would like to get her off the bottle. We do offer her a drinking cup (regular one’s with the spout and even the ones with straws) and she drinks from them but she prefers drinking water from them instead of her milk. As for her bottle, I was told that if I can get her to snack/eat more she won’t take the bottle as often. So, we offer all types of snacks and foods but depending on her mood that will determine if she will eat. And then too when she does eat, she doesn’t eat very much. If you see my daughter you can tell she is not being deprived of anything and obviously she is getting her nutrients. She is not a thin toothpick nor is she a chubby baby. So, how do I get my daughter off the bottle if that is her main source of intake?

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So What Happened?

WOW!!!…. Thank you so much for all the responses back to my question. I really didn’t expect to get so much helpful advice. I appreciate it all!

So, after my husband and I read through the responses we received yesterday we decided we would put only water in the bottle and milk in the cup. That went ok. When she would ask for her bottle we offered her the two options. Of course her first choice was the bottle. She sucked it, gave us a look and threw it across the room. LOL. Then we offered the cup, which she took, drank a little of the milk and gave it back. That’s how it went through out the day. BUT, when it came time to go to sleep (she doesn’t always need the bottle to fall asleep) last night she was looking for the security from her bottle. And that became our first challenge. She just cried and through a fit. Daddy tried his normal foot rub (which usually helps 50% of the time to get her to sleep). We offered her numerous times the water bottle (which she totally refused) and the milk cup which she kept trying to suck while lying down. Of course that didn’t work because it was a cup with a straw. Well, eventually after a couple hours she did end up falling asleep with the help of dad’s foot rub.

This morning when she woke up the first thing I did was I took her to the kitchen, brought out all her bottles, put them in front of her and told her we were going to “opala” (trash) them all. We stood in front of the trash and I started with the first one. As soon as I did the first one I cheered “Yah… opala”. She then decided to join in and continued to throw each one in all by herself. Each time she threw one in I cheered her on. After the last bottle, I gave her a BIG hug and told her she was now a BIG girl. Immediately after that I showed her her cup of milk (which she wasn’t ready to drink from cause I think it was too early in the morning) and I gave her a bowl of cereal. At this point, she is watching her Wiggles and seems to be content with her bowl of cereal. We’ll see how the day continues.

Well.... we (or should I say "I") have made it through half the day. All morning i tried to keep my daughter occupied with snacks. And it did work. But when nap time came rolling around that's when the crying began. After continuous efforts of asking for her baba (which I kept telling her it was opala) she finally gave up and fell asleep. With tears still in her eyes and drool all over her face and my shirt.:0)

Oh yeah, I just wanted to make a comment on the wonderful parents that feel that drinking a bottle at the age of 21 months is not a harm to the child. I do agree with that too but the reason I am doing this now is because I feel I am now ready for it. I strongly believe that when it is decided that your child will be weaned from a bottle or pacifier and/or when you want start potty training it really depends on if “the parent” is the one that is ready. We are the ones that have to deal with the whining, screaming and crying and we are the ones that have to consistent so if we can handle that our child will be weaned or trained. So thank you again for all the comments and suggestions.

April 5th (3 days since we got rid of the baba):
My daughter has been doing great. Occasionally (once or twice a day) she has asked for her baba but we just tell her it's gone, offer something else and she's fine. Another great thing that we have seen from all of this is the amount of intake of solids she is taking in. It's a trip. We have never seen her eat so much. But then again we expected it since we were taking away the baba which was her main source of food. She always got full off the amount of bottles she drank through out the day which caused her to eat less. The only bad thing now is that since we cut out the baba she doesn't drink as much milk. Actually she doesn't drink it at all. She doesn't care to drink milk through any cup. So now we have to improvise with other calcium items... cheese, yougurt, etc.

Other than that I think we have conquered that mountain. Thank you again for all you responses!

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D.M.

answers from San Diego on

My kids are older now, but we did it the "hard core" way - at about 22 mos., we did the "bottle ceremony" where we threw them away, and they got a special prize. It was hard for a couple of days, but they got used to it right away. You need to throw them all away for good, that way you have no choice but to use sippy cups. A child past age 2 should not have a bottle. We also had the binky ceremony a month later, that was harder, but they got over it, and they are fine today!

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S.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

When I took my twins off the bottle it was in stages. They got the bottle only at bed and nap time. They took all liquids in the sippy cup till nap or bed at night. The final stage was giving them a drink (in the sippy cup) and putting them down for nap or bed time. Yes they cried. It would be best to get the bottles out of the house at this time, so no one slides back to the bottle. This is what I did with all 4 of my daughters. Thay are very responsable adults now. The twins are 34 and the other 2 are 26 and 25. It is easier to potty train after they are off the bottle. Good luck.

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T.R.

answers from San Diego on

Try cutting the nipple to make the hole bigger. This will lose the desire to want a bottle. I did the same with a pacifier and it really helped. Good luck
T.

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L.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hello and Good Morning,
I dont want to come accross rude, but I honestly think you need to chose your battles, who cares if she still uses a bottle, she is a baby, and I promise you, its not going to change what a terrific child/person she will be in the future, I have 3 daughters, 5, 2 and 5 months.....My 2 year old still uses it, she loves it, its healthy, and it makes her feel good. How would you feel if someone took something away from you that you loved? I am just so annoyed with moms, dr's etc...and the bottle, who cares, its so a zero deal to my family, and my daughter will be just as amazing when she is 10,20, and 90 even though she is still using a bottle.
Good Luck and I have to say, use your heart and dont listen to other people, I hate when people try to tell me what to do, I am a terrific mommy and I will continue to choose my battles, which we face a lot as mommys, and this is sure a small one in comparison.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

With her "baby" bottle, dilute her milk gradually with water. Then in her sippy or straw cup, put regular milk in it.
The child will definitely notice the difference. One tastes junk and the other won't. It may take a bit for her to give in to the transition... but keep encouraging her. :)

I also did this with my boy, who when I had to transition him from breast to formula to milk... he didn't like straight milk... so I would mix a little formula and topped it off with milk... then gradually it just went to straight milk. And it was a painless transition for him. And I gradually just offered him the cup. By then, he got used to it.

This is what I have done and my friend did this as well. It worked. ALso offer her other diary foods so she gets her calcium that way as well.
Hope this helps! Good luck,
~Susan
www.cafepress.com/littlegoogoo

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B.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Dear J.,

The concern I have in reading your letter is that it sounds like you are starting to cut out milk in order to get her off the bottle. Every change I made with my babies, I made as gradually as possible (like taking the rail off the crib and putting a bed safety rail on in its place before moving them to the bed itself). Weaning off the bottle, I started by cutting the amount in the bottles by two ounces. So my son went from having four 8 oz bottles to four 6 ounce bottles, then I cut back on the number of bottles, four to three to two (with a few days to a couple weeks for adjustment.) When he was down to two bottles a day, I cut them down two more ounces - and then cut them back again - so that eventually my son was getting two 2 ounce bottles a day. These were at nap and bedtime. Then I just held him until he fell asleep without the bottles.

At one point, I was taking my son to an endocrinologist, and she asked how much milk he got in a day - and when I could only say for sure 12 ounces (two 6 oz bottles) because the rest was out of a cup, and I didn't measure that, (after she asked why he wasn't getting three 8 oz bottles a day [my answer was because he was two years old and I was weaning him OFF the bottle!]) I got a long lecture about the fact that the pre-pubescent requirement for calcium is the equivalent of 24 oz of milk a day (post-pubescent it goes up to 32 oz of milk equivalent). I decided at that point that I would only offer milk in his cups to make sure he got enough calcium. My concern isn't for her nutrition in general, but specifically for her calcium intake. Just be careful with that - you don't want her to grow up to have weak bones!

Good luck!
B.

I saw your update after I entered my response - good job, and continued good luck!

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K.T.

answers from Los Angeles on

I also have a daughter who will be 2 in June!! I was lucky in that I got her off the bottle at 12 months. I simply took it away. I know it's harder at this age, but I did the same with my older daughter. I talked to her about being a big girl and we said "bye" to the bottles. She had a hard time for about 2 days and really didn't drink much from a sippy. After that, she got sick of protesting and took the milk from an alternative route! I found greater success with a straw because it's different and fun. I would take it away cold turkey!

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A.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

You should hide or throw out all the bottles, that way your not tempted to give them to her. Both of my daughters had their last bottle the night before their first birthday. They were a little hesitant about drinking milk from a sippy cup at first. For one of them I would have to heat up the milk a little for her to drink it, and the for my other daughter, I put a little bit of chocolate Nesquick in her cup, and she loves it. It's okay if she's not drinking milk all day, ask your pediatrician how much she needs to be drinking. But really the first thing you should do is get rid of the bottles all at once. She'll forget about them faster than you think. Best of luck, be strong.

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M.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Cold turkey. That's way to old to be on a bottle (my opinion).
If she hungry enough or thirsty, she'll take it any way you give it to her. I'm sure she will have fits, but she'll get over it soon enough.
Good luck!

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J.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

wow i feel bad for you my daughter was off the bottle at 7mos. does she just prefer the soft nipple? if so try thr nuby brand cups. it took me a month of offering a cup to my daughter to get her to drink out of it and 3 days to eliminate the bottle starting with the bed time one first. maybe tell her that she is a big girl and big girls use cups not bottles and have her throw her bottles away or something. and let her pick out a cup she likes! just give it time she will make the transition soon enough!

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A.D.

answers from Honolulu on

hello there..

what i did with my oldest was stop the snack bottles, the mid morning bottle. the i gradually took the mid afternoon bottle away. then i took the morning nap bottle away and the bedtime bottle last...i kept the bottles out of site and just offered water or juice. have you tried the sippy cup from wal-mart, the "nuby" brand..that's what did it for him. with my second..i just stopped and just gave her mild with a swirly straw. hope that helps! good luck

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E.O.

answers from Washington DC on

I had the same problem when my son turned one. The docs say you should really start transitioning to cup when you start incorporating juice. I tried all different kinds of cups, paid all kinds of money for more and more cups and he just didn't want it. Well finally I just threw all the bottles in the trash (more for my protection of not giving in). Then I offered him his milk in the cup. After about a day of refusing, he took it. I was very worried he would be thirsty and he was a bit upset but he got over it. I think it is more us, the moms, that have to have the willpower to do it. Good luck!!!

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L.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

I have a variation of some of the responses, and I disagree with Leesa, your child needs to know how to use a cup properly by 3 so starting her now is a good idea.
Is there something she wants really badly at Toys r us or someplace(I bet there will be by June.) Gather all her bottles WITH her and tell her you are going to use them to pay for this item. Bring them all into the store, pick out the item and have her use her bag of bottles to pay for the item(actually have HER hand over the bag) and she gets the prize. It worked for my 4 neices and nephews and my 2 kids. They knew they were gone and never asked for it again.
Obviously you have to alert the girl at the checkout and really pay for the item ahead of time. If there is not a specific item she has been wanting then take her to the store and have her choose something to pay for with the bottles. Also make sure there is not a bottle hiding somewhere that she will find.
Good luck!

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K.F.

answers from San Diego on

I have a 22 month old that will be 2 in June as well. I am having the same problem getting her off the bottle. The only thing I have found is to start limiting the number of bottles she has a day and eventually they will become less and less. I have just started doing that so we shall see..

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S.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

We put an infant nipple on our son's bottle. The flow was so slow and he hated it. He gave up the bottle within a week.

Good luck...I know that weaning off the bottle is not fun =)

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

If you get rid of ALL the bottles she'll use her sippy cup. It worked for me everytime. But how important is it to you that she is off the bottle by age 2. Does it give her comfort and pleasure? What did you do with your older children? Did you take the bottle away or did they give it up themselves?

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H.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

I'm sorry but I don't see the harm in still drinking from a bottle. My daughter gradually weaned off the bottle shortly before turning four. Will it affect her teeth later on? Maybe...but my husband and I both wore braces so we figured it was an expense to be expected. Gradually I introduced straws, she never liked sippy cups and now she is fine and the bottles are all gone. I don't agree with all the supernanny or cold turkey ideas and my daughter is doing fine. Only my opinion but do what you think is best. Good luck.

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B.K.

answers from San Diego on

My daughter was very attached to the bottle too. She was 19 months old when I finally got her off it. What worked for me was feeding her more solid food and giving her a sippy cup with a straw. We put the bottles in a tupperware box in the garage so they were out of the house, and just let her know that the one was her last bottle and she was gonna be a big girl tomorrow and not have any more bottles cuz bottles are for babies. She also wanted about 3 or 4 teddy bears for the attachment issue of it. She still cried (screamed) for her bottle for 4 or 5 days, but then it was over and we moved onto the next big stump. It's very hard to listen to her cry, but she needs you to be strong and not give in.

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T.D.

answers from San Diego on

Hi,
We have a 22 month old and a 3 year old. We took our 22 month old off the bottle at 1 year. Gradually put less and less in your childs bottle if that is the only way she will drink her milk. Sit her down with the family at meals and give her what ever you all are eating. Put milk in her cup and let her eat and drink whatever she decides. As you continue to offer her three regular meals and 2 snakes along with milk or water in her cup, she will adjust to her new way of taking her fluids. As you said, she is by no means starving so if she does not eat a lot at meals maybe she is not hungry. Remember her tummy is small. Close her hand and look at her fist. That is the size of her tummy, and I bet it does not take much to fill it up.
Good luck

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L.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I got my daughter off of hers right before she turned two, I did use the "sippy cup", but the ones from NUK, they look like cups, but their spout is softer and a little longer like a nipple, so she thought that she was getting her "baba", but she wasn't of course, and she uses this instead, but not all day long, or carrying it around like she did with the bottle. but I have to admit, that the first 4-5 nights were horrible...I didn't give her the bottle to fall asleep, which was her main necessity at that time, and she cried and cried, for about ten-fifteen minutes each night, then she would either fall asleep, or take her sippy cup in return. It was hard, but a few days of that, and now she just goes to sleep with her cup, and she's good all day. she only uses it when she is thirsty, rather than the "security" of always have her "baba". Good luck, I know it sounds kind of harsh, but I did have to let her have her tantrums for a biit, and she got over it in a few days.

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C.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

I got my son off the bottle on his birthday. We made a big deal about what a big boy he was and took pictures of him throwing it away. The next year we made a big deal about his binkie. After the 'ceremony' we took him to the toy store to pick out a toy.
Worked for me.

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B.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

It seems like you realize that she doesn't need it nutritionally- at this point the bottle is not a nutritional but an emotional need. I am going to venture that it is her security object. She probably wants it more when she is stressed, tired, or out of her element. First, you're going to need to replace this bond which can be hard for a parent to do because it usually develops naturally. I would take it away, possibly pull a super nanny and put all of her bottles in a box and tell them that you're going to send them to a baby because she's a big girl and doesn't need a bottle- it helps her to severe the tie emotionally if she can participate. However, she might not cooperate. Regardless, she doesn't need it, so don't give it to her. She might be grumpy for two days, but she'll be fine. In the mean time, try to help her form an attachment to a blankie, a doll, a stuffed toy, whatever that she can use to replace the bottle emotionally.

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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

Either just take it away cold turkey, or snip the nipple. I would gear her for it over the next few days, having lots of talks about moving to a big girl cup and then decide on the day.

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N.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

When my daughter turned two, we left out all of her bottles for the bottle fairy. We had talked about it for the previous months-- how at two she would be a big girl who no longer needed her bottles. The fairy took all of the bottles away and left her some lovely books and silks for play and dress up. We never heard another request for her bottle!

Good Luck,

N.

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H.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

I've heard that if you start only filling the bottle with water, while offering lots of snacks through out the day, the bottle will seem less exciting. But definitely be prepared for tears and whining- 2 yr olds are so good at that!

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A.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

My daughter is 14 months old, and I have the same problem.....your not alone! People tell not to push her, but I still feel like I need to encourage her. I would love to hear how you get through this stage!!

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C.C.

answers from Reno on

I had to stop the bottle with my son at 9 months because he shook the milk all over the carpet and furniture for fun. I just threw out the bottles while he was watched and handed him a the leak proof sippy cup(I figured surely he is smart enough not to starve over it). He figured the cup out and figured out that I was no longer going to give him a bottle. With some children it's just about them knowing that you aren't going to give in. Of course all children are different but I wasn't going to let our son make a mess when he could drink out of a cup. I realize your little one isn't as trying as mine but it's important at this age to let them know that you know they are capable and not willing to bend. If she can drink all other liquids from a sippy cup she can drink milk from one and she is only refusing to do so because she knows she can.

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