How Are Events Termed Important Vs. Not?

These things do sound kinda silly but they are important to the kids. Maybe you could record it and they could watch it together and he could get a complete narrative on it. If he sits on the couch all excited to see it and talk about it, that will probably make him equally as happy as having him there.

I think all graduations before junior high are funny

If I sent my kids to school, we would skip any such nonsense. I couldn't fathom asking hubby to miss a meeting for such.....

If one parent can go, I think that is good.

Graduating from Kindergarten is not something I consider an accomplishment. I feel it is lower the expectation bar for children.

Save vacation days for a real vacation.

I have a kindergartener and would not expect nor need my husband there. I would want him there if I could not go. One family member (parent, grandparent, aunt or uncle) would be good. Space is usually limited.

I think it is ridiculous and unfair that the school plans these "important" events during the school day and then get the kids all hyped up about how "important" this is and basically tell the kids whose parents can't attend that they must not really care.

Here is how WE decide what is important: If the teachers took time our of THEIR evening/weekend to attend an event, then it is a big deal. If it is just held during the regular school day, then it is a "for fun" event. Also, we don't tie showing love for a child to what events are attended - that is simply unfair and unrealistic.

If you can go, great - I don't think that your husband needs to go if he is busy supporting the family.

I would not take off work for my kid's kindergarten graduation because it is not a real graduation. I told my kids it isn't real, it is just a chance for the school to praise you for nothing. My kids are okay with that.

Ya know, I tried to let it go but I can't get past, " Child wondered why other Dads did go. I view Kinder grad as important since it's an opportunity to show love to a child." So your child asked why his dad can't make it and you didn't just say, because daddy has a meeting he can't get out of? Daddy loves you but just can't change his schedule? I mean that is what your words say to me, that you left the kid hanging thinking that dad doesn't love him as much as other dads love their kids.

That's just it--what's important to one person, is not necessarily important to another. My husband thinks Kinder grad is ridiculous. He will go next week, but still thinks it's ridiculous. My other son had a thing at school and hubby did not attend. Hubby works 30 minutes from school and the event was at 1pm. So, hubby would have had to go back to work after.

My advice: give your opinion and then drop it. In the grand scheme of life, it's probably not that important. There might be a dad in the front row that beats his son's mom--going to graduation doesn't make him a good dad. Your husband not going doesn't make him a bad dad.

We pretty much determined if events were important based on the level of personal accomplishment, effort and achievement. For example: kindergarten graduation. Most kids will graduate and get their little moment in the spotlight simply because they were a participating part of the class, did the work that was expected, and didn't get expelled - let's be honest. But for another kindergarten child who's fought cancer, or who suffered a tremendous tragic loss, but who managed to still participate in kindergarten and graduate, well, that's something the whole town should attend! (At least the whole family).

The same thing applies to concerts, and similar events. If the whole class is singing a little spring concert, regardless of ability, then it's ok for just one parent to go, if possible. However, if it's a music group that your student had to audition for, rigorously practice for, and has a solo in the upcoming spring concert, then more of a family effort should be made.

When my ds graduated from high school, only me and dh and dd attended. School was easy for ds, and we didn't even throw him a party. We gave him a laptop for college, and after graduation was over, he was off to a round of parties all over the town. We knew that and anticipated that and were fine with that. That was the kind of kid he was (and is): lots of friends, pretty easy time of getting a great GPA and getting accepted into college.

However, when dd graduated from high school, after 7 long, long years, with about a 1.0 GPA, we threw a party like the presidential inaugural ball. Her graduating was a massive achievement - with all her medical problems, hospitalizations, the days she attended her online classes when she couldn't even lift her head off the pillow, the effort was amazing. We invited tons of people (who all came), and we took everyone out to dinner and made a huge deal of her - dh bought her flowers, and people brought stuffed animals and flowers and gift cards.

So, bottom line. Is the event an "everyone pretty much has achieved the same thing" or "is my child graduating or performing because he's in kindergarten or first grade or eighth grade and everyone in kindergarten or first grade or eighth grade is also graduating or performing" or is this an event where the child or student has persevered against the odds, and has overcome something (whether its anxiety or illness or injury or trauma or learning disability, minor or major)? That was how we decided what to attend and what one of us could attend, and usually it was me because dh was working. He did attend one of ds' middle school events, but it was something ds won an award for and would be personally recognized. Other than that, he didn't take time off. But we always made sure to observe the occasion that evening - with the grad's favorite dessert, or going out for dinner, or an appropriate gift, etc.

Wow I may be an old fuddy duddy at 47 (kids in high school/college now) but seriously K grad??? Preschool grad??? What's next, "I can poop in the potty" grad?
Sorry, I guess you can tell that I'm not a big fan of making things kids should be doing anyway into milestone major events that adults should alter their work/life schedules around.
And I'm a pretty hippy dippy, breast feeding, co sleeping kinda mom, but I'm with your husband on this one.
When your child wonders why dad isn't there remind him how hard daddies (and mommies!) work to provide for their families so they can have such nice things, food, medicine, etc.
I can't believe EVERY dad, or mom for that matter, is able or even willing to attend.

meh. It's kindergarten.
I would take some pictures and a video and then have your kid show the videos and pictures to dad. I would rather my husband take vacation time for something better then that. I think it's one more reason our kids may be a bit more spoiled...we have preschool graduation, kindergarten graduation, 5th grade, 8th grade, high school, and THEN college! Ummm....High school and college are the big deals.
Actually, not that I think about it....neither one of my older boys have had a kindergarten graduation. Maybe it's a regional thing?
I don't think this is a hill worth dying on.

The idea that parents can just take time off to go to these mini-graduations is a luxury for many people. I'm also of the opinion that we, as a whole society, are making WAY too much of kindergarten graduations. I understand the preschool transition send off festivities for non-returning children, but I also think that (even as an early childhood educator)-- these things are really more for the parents than they are for the children.

I mean, it's kindergarten. They are on their way to first grade, "Hooray!" and moving on....
It should not be a big deal to 'graduate' kinder. I'm sorry if I offend some people, but I believe this is true. We seem to live in a culture which 'celebrates' way too much of what is natural and mundane.

You have to decide if it is a hill to die on. I chose not to die on that hill. I'm a stay at home mom, so when my son 'graduated' kindergarten, honestly, I didn't even remember to bring a camera. There are always, *always* kids who will not have both parents there. Some kids may not have even one. If my son had complained or wondered aloud to me about it, I would simply reply, "Your dad works very hard for us and needs to be at work right now. I know he will love to hear about it tonight and maybe you can draw a picture about it or we can write a story about it to share with him." I would never, ever let my son feel that it was because his father didn't 'want' to be there. By the nature of my husband's job, leaving for even a short time in the middle of the day can interrupt a lot of flow going on as well as meetings he has scheduled. It doesn't just hang him up to leave, it can hang everyone up. My son still feels very loved by his dad because of those times when they are together.

You don't have to show up for every single thing to be a good parent. Many parents can't. It's a simple as that.

I also have to agree with questioning the idea of this being an event to 'show love to a child'. You realize that you are confusing 'showing love' and 'paying special attention to the child'. Anyone can go to an event and just be present--Showing love is done on a daily basis. To suggest that one has to go to 'show love' kind of gives me the heebie jeebies. It doesn't sit well with me. The parent who works three jobs shows just as much love to their kid in their life's actions as the parent who can attend these events. Again, this is a luxury for many families, to have the ability to take time off work.

As a mom to older kids I PROMISE you they do no remember this stuff. I just spent a mom daughter weekend with youngest (18) a few of her friends and a couple of moms and we (the moms) were talking about all these things, plays, recitals, other school events and the girls were clueless. All they really remember/care about are the big things, first dance, first kiss, getting into college, the fact that their parents are still together.
As Elsa would say, let it go, let it go, this is way more about YOU than your child or spouse, so go and enjoy but don't make these things into something bigger than they are.

People make ceremonies for any and everything. It doesn't mean that the ceremony is all that important. There is nothing important about a kinder ceremony.

There are plenty of opportunities to show love to a child. Just because you think what you do doesn't mean that everyone needs to. If you are a stay-at-home mom, then it's easy for you to do this. Just because he's been at the same company for 10 years doesn't mean that his meeting isn't important.

You're really new at this school thing. You will have to get used to the fact that your husband will not take off of work for everything where your daughter is concerned. That's just the way things are. I speak from experience, as a mom of two kids in their 20's.

Parents work probably longer hours than in the 70's when I was a kid and often both parents work yet the number of times parents are supposed to be at school has skyrocketed. It's ridiculous. I almost want to tell my kids no so they don't grow up so entitled bc every little thing they do is celebrated. It's not doing anyone any good. I tell my kids they're supposed to finish these grades. Don't expect a fuss. Does the school have graduations for all grades every year? Tell your son his father works hard to provide things your family needs and while he's very special to your husband, he's not so special to your husband's boss. In the adult world, we don't always get what we want. Good lesson to start early. My husband never made these things. I do think one adult should be there and preferably a parent but both is overkill. My kids aren't that old but don't remember these events at all. So much fuss and they don't even remember.

If it was important, the school would hold it when parents could attend. I find it offensive that schools think parents can just skip out of work for any little thing. Our preschool didn't have graduation - kids started and finished whenever it was convenient and when they were ready for kindergarten. Some went summers, some did not. I would not consider kindergarten graduation terribly important either and having one parent attend would be perfectly acceptable. My son's Montessori school did consider finishing (they only went through kindergarten) to be a milestone and they therefore held the ceremony and a whole school picnic on a Saturday so all could attend. My son is 10. He barely remembers preschool and very little of kindergarten.

My rule of thumb is that if it's during the school day, it's not that important. Those are the events where if one parent can attend, great. No need for both to be there. If something is really important, it will be scheduled at a time when most parents can attend. I have gone to a lot of school events because I worked from home several days a week and had total flexibility. My husband has no flexibility, so there's no well in hell he's going to leave work to come to a kiddie "graduation" or end of year picnic or daytime concert, etc. Take some pics and video for him and have your child share with him at the end of the day.

I agree with your husband. He is working hard to support the family and I would support him doing that.

I would also talk to my kid about how proud daddy is but he has an important job and can't go to everything at school. There will be a TON of things that parents are invited to and he won't be able to go. Instead of setting your kid up for disappointment, make sure they are PROUD to have such a hard working dad that takes care of them.

That being said, I would also talk to hubby to say the same thing to the kid. That he is so proud and happy but he has to work during the day and can't go to a lot of the school events. Just to be clear...not showing up at school events does NOT mean you don't show love to your kid as you said. So get that out of your head. There will be lots of kids there without dads or moms or both believe it or not. So set your kid up to have the right attitude and maybe work on yours at the same time. Good luck.

I always left it up to my husband whether he would or wouldn't attend a school event. I was a stay at home mom so I could easily attend these events. My husband has a career and although he works from home he is always very busy. If my husband made the decision not to attend I would be fine with that. I certainly do not view his attendance as an opportunity to "show love to a child." Missing a meeting may seem small to you but that is only your opinion.

I am like you though and love to have reasons to celebrate. This is why I would make a special dinner, have a special treat for dessert or we would go out to dinner to celebrate as a family for these small, somewhat made up milestones.

I think it is important that someone be there for the child, whether it be mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, aunt, uncle or even a special family friend. I don't think it is important for everyone to be at all these things all the time. There will be hundreds of school concerts, assemblies, award ceremonies, games, plays, presentations etc over the next several years. I think as long as dad makes a point of attending some of them it is fine. I have attended the majority of these things over the years while my husband is at work. He attends when he can. My kids understand that he can't make it to everything and they appreciate when he is there. Neither one of them remembers their kindergarten grads anyway.

They are having the kindergarten graduation on a weekday?
Ours did it on a Saturday (it was a private school) so no one had difficulty with work conflicts.
There was no graduation for our sons pre-school - that seems like a bit much.
One the one hand it's nice to get to all these things.
On the other hand - he's got 12 more year of school (plus college) - there will be lots more to go to.

I don't remember any sort of kindergarten graduations when I was going to school (in the 60's).
There wasn't one from elementary to middle school either - there was one for 8th grade (middle school to high school).
And then high school, and college.
You and Hubby are going to have to strike a balance.
What works for one family might not work for another.
Keep talking - make it a date night - over a little wine and dinner out.

my kids public school does not do kindergarten graduation. so i guess its not a big deal to this town.

eh. i could care less, though i'm the one who goes. as kids have gotten older, now my husband wants to make the time to attend these ceremonies, sports events etc, but i think it's an overkill. save vacation time for vacation time.

Graduation is from high school to college. Everything else is a transition. It's great if you can both make it, but as the parent of a 9 year old - if one of you can go, you're in good shape.

People have to work. Kids need to know how the world works. My husband is in med school. He CAN'T make everything. But I usually can. And my son knows WHY.

EVERY day is an opportunity to show love to a child. Kinder grad is only one of them and will not scar your child for life unless it's made into a big drama.

Now, if there's something deeper going on - if your husband is always not available, that's different.

I personally think it's incredibly important. My second child is promoting from 5th grade on June 10th. My husband has a class to teach and he's working on getting out of it so he can be there.

While I don't think they should call these things graduations, it's part of the fun of childhood. I don't know, I enjoy seeing my kids move up to the next stage. 1st grade is WAY different from K, 6th is WAY different from 5th, and 9th is WAY different from 8th...that's why *I* think these milestones are celebrated.

But my kids are used to my husband and I being there to celebrate all of their accomplishments if possible. Sometimes we can't make it, but it's only happened 2 times that we have both missed the same thing. It's up to your family though...if your husband doesn't go, he can explain to your son why he isn't going. That's my opinion.

ETA: I just read a lot of the other responses and see I am the abnormal one, but that's okay. I know at my kids school, there are a few kids who's parents aren't at these events and they always look so, so sad. Maybe it's regional? I don't know...but we always go, unless something big prevents us from being there. Not wanting to take a few hours of leave wouldn't be it.

For me, it would really depend on the meeting. I have things at work that are out of my control, schedule-wise, that I really can't miss unless it is a dire emergency (I'm in the hospital or an immediate family member dies). My husband and I do a LOT of trading off- maybe I have to miss an event at school, he has to miss a recital. Between us, one parent is there! For K graduation, I wouldn't be bothered if my husband had an important meeting and had to miss it. If the meeting was a weekly check-in with his team? I'd probably ask him to skip it.

Is this your first or only? You will find that they have first days, graduations, award ceremonies, dads and donuts days, plays, choirs, games, along with church ceremonies and events. There is no way possible for a working parent to attend everything. You have to pick and choose. By that, I don't mean every year pick one or two, I mean they add up and pretty soon you are always taking off for a special event.

We are two working parents and we miss a lot, but we do a lot. Tomorrow morning our daughter will do the reading for her church. Neither parent will be there. However, every hour we are not at work, we spend wither and for her. She may not like it, but she gets it.

There is no right or wrong answer. I'm kind of the one who has to decide in our family. If it's something I feel my husband really should be there for I try to make sure I give him plenty of notice and remind him about it 2 weeks before and again 1 week before (so that the doesn't accidentally schedule anything). I always explain to him why I think it's important for him to be there for that particular even. I also make a point to talk about the many other events that are happening. I don't do that to make him feel bad or anything. I want him to know what's going on in our boys' lives. I also want him to kind of be aware of just how many things there are, in part, so that if I do ask him to join me, he knows it really matters. But if he can't go, he can't go. I have a full-time job, too, so I've had to miss things and he's been the parent to go. So I get it.

Is this something that you've known about for awhile or something you just found out about? Do make sure that you give him plenty of notice so that he doesn't schedule a meeting at the wrong time.

Maybe you could try to keep a list of things going on and talk to him about what he might be able to come to and what he would deem "important."

There are no easy answers, and the truth is neither one of you is going to be able to make it to everything. Just do the best you can. Also, remember that your son might ask why other dads are there, but that doesn't mean he's going to be scarred for life. Just say, "I wish Daddy could be here, too. Maybe we can show him the pictures I took, and you can tell him all about it tonight!" He will be ok, and really, it's your job to help him be ok with what is ... especially when he wishes it could be different.

I think one parent is more then enough. honestly, unless he generally doesn't make his kid a priority overall then this really doesn't matter. My daughters kindy graduation is next week and we are both going, but it's not my top choice for using time off. There are lots of school activities that we pretty much split up so that one of us is usually there. By this age, I think your child should be capable of understanding that dad is being responsible by going to work. Also, there are so many other ways of showing you love your child (like working to make sure they have a roof over their head)

I don't consider preschool, kinder, elementary, or junior high graduations important. High school and college graduations are important to me.

I would probably go because I think this kind of stuff is adorable and my job allows me to work flex hours. But, it's also OK for kids to know that they are not the center of the universe. A parent can be a great, loving parent and still not go to every single thing.

ETA: I also agree with Starr's response.

Our schools don't make a big deal out of finishing one grade and going on to another. The kids don't get it, especially at this age. Leaving a school and moving on to the next step, maybe. But for some kids, it makes it more traumatic actually, since the actual transition isn't until September.

I do think it's a huge hardship in a day and age when too many parents are working too many jobs just to be able to afford to live in towns with good schools systems. It's impossible for parents in minimum wage, hourly jobs or part-time jobs with zero benefits to take unpaid time off. So for many of them, it feels like a bit of classism to make events available only for those who can afford to live on one salary and have the 2nd parent with an executive job and free time.

When you add in recitals and concerts and graduations and class parties and field trips, and then teacher in-service days and snow days and so on, it really reduces the amount of real class time the kids have.

While it's wonderful for your child to have you there, it's pretty miserable for the other children who can't have anyone there, and didn't for preschool, and won't for 3rd, 6th, or 8th grade "graduations" - which, as others have said, they really aren't. 12th grade and college are the true graduations.

But I think your biggest problem is that you and your husband aren't on the same page. It's not so much that he doesn't have time for the child, it seems, but more that you feel he is dissing you by having something "more important" to do. You associate this event with "showing love to a child." I certainly hope that your child, and other children, don't gauge a parent's missing work as a measure of love. So you and your husband need to come to a meeting of the minds so that both of you feel better and have your priorities aligned.

I say hubby should go to his meeting. I am soooooo over all these stupid promotions/graduations. To me, they are VERY unimportant.

It's nice to have events but the child is moving from kindergarten to first grade.

I recall going from kindergarten to first grade and no ceremony. My cousin in another town (back in the late 50s) had this ceremony and I as a child thought it odd to have such a thing with cap and gown. She also went to first grade as well.

Now days we as a nation want to celebrate everything a child does and sometimes parents can't attend regardless. My husband missed many events being military and away from us. He just couldn't hop a plane and be there even if and when he wanted. We made celebrations later and made up for the missed ones.

I would have a chat with hubby and find out why and what are important to him in the life of his child and the child's accomplishments. That way you know when to bug him or not about the date, time, and place.

Junior high was okay but it just signified that I finished my elementary years and was off to high school. High school was like the completion of all 12 years of schooling and I would be on my own to make my decisions from now on. That was important in my book for many reasons some of which were not for me but for my parents as I did graduate from high school and they did not (in that era many parents did not finish school due to family and helping them get on with life and such). I am still working on my college degree and maybe one day in the next 10 years I will have it. But I have learned much along the way of life.

So whatever you do, don't make it a mountain to die on.

the other S.

I don't see anywhere in your post that says it would be a financial hardship or cause your family not to have a summer vacation if hubby asked off this meeting.

I am sure if a friend got great tickets to a game or a free round of golf, hubby could make time during the work week for that. ...

But trying to Make him attend the celebration would probably backfire.

Better just to go yourself.and try to get dad to celebrate a little when you are all together later.

Updated

I don't see anywhere in your post that says it would be a financial hardship or cause your family not to have a summer vacation if hubby asked off this meeting.

I am sure if a friend got great tickets to a game or a free round of golf, hubby could make time during the work week for that. ...

But trying to Make him attend the celebration would probably backfire.

Better just to go yourself.and try to get dad to celebrate a little when you are all together later.

I love seeing my kids at school events and personally, I wouldn't ever want to miss them. Go, take pictures, smile, and enjoy the heck out of the event (whatever they call it). People can get all bent out of shape about whether or not schools should have these, or how convenient they are for families, but the fact remains this is a part of your child's world. I wouldn't say a word to your child about Dad missing it, I'd just go. If your child asks you, I'd just be honest and say "Dad had a business meeting at the same time as your event and he wasn't able to go" IF your child wants to talk about it further, or expresses any negative feelings, I would encourage him to talk to his Dad about his feelings. Otherwise, don't make a big deal. If the child senses you're unhappy that Dad isn't there, he/she will pick up on your emotions. Dad's going to be the one missing out, but that's his choice. Or, maybe it's not exactly a choice, but perhaps more complicated not knowing his work situation. Any time I get notice of an important school event, I will pass along the date/time to my DH right away, so he can block it on his calendar. The less notice he has, the harder it is sometimes to get out of work commitments. Larger events usually have enough notice, but sometimes smaller ones have not given families enough notice, and you just have to explain some of this to the children.

I 100% empathize with your situation, but after 28 years of marriage and 3 children (19, 16 and 11), I have learned to let the 'little stuff' go. Our hubbies feel it is their job to provide for the family and they can't see the sense in taking time off from that important role for the minor celebrations. We can't change it, so might as well accept it!

I'm generally of the opinion that graduations are not that important. Heck, I didn't even "walk" when I was done with college, although I did for grad school (I didn't want to, but did it for my parents' sake).

It's a little different with my kids, though. I would do my best to attend all of my kids' events, including kinder grad. If my kids were graduating from kinder, I would take time off work to attend and I would ask my husband to do the same unless his meeting was really important. At the same time, if one of us couldn't attend because of an important meeting at work, it's no biggie and life goes on.

Tyler and I feel that milestones are important. We attend when we can. Since I'm the stay at home parent? It usually falls on me. Tyler was deployed several times when our kids were in school. Skype and Facetime allowed him to "be there" when he could.

As to Kindergarten "graduation"? It's exciting for the kids, but really just a thing for them to do. I would attend, Tyler would not. Yes, this is a "milestone" but it's not one that I would make me tell Tyler to show up for.

In my book, there are 3 milestone graduations that should be attended by parents and grandparents (if they can reasonably do so). Kindergarten graduation. High school graduation. College graduation.

Out of those three, the one least important for a grandparent to attend would be college, in my opinion.

When kids are very small, these types of milestones are huge deals to them. And every other kid there will have tons of family most likely. A 5 year old cannot understand the reasoning behind a parent not attending due to a business meeting the same as a high school graduate or an adult graduating college. All they know is "Dad didn't come." Rather than it being a reflection on Dad, or a peek into the importance of Dad's work... it feels like rejection. An older person can give thought to whether it is reasonable for certain people to be in attendance or not. Whether their conflicts/excuses pass muster as legitimate. Whether it indicates the person cares or whether the person is saddened by circumstances beyond their control. A 5 year old only knows Dad isn't there. And everyone else's managed to make it.

I find it difficult to justify his not going. Surely he could finagle his schedule/meeting a few hours so that he could attend. If he really wanted to.
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ETA: Wait, so this graduation is during the regular school day hours? If that is the case, then one parent attending is fine. I've never been to one like that, but I have been to PLENTY of "during the day" awards and ceremonies and events... and none of them warranted Dad taking off work for. I remember back in the day (my own Kindergarten graduation) and we had dances we had learned and were to perform, certain types of dress to wear, and it was a BIG DEAL. My own kids were in private school for those ages and they did NOT have any sort of event for Pre-k, but they had a formal graduation for Kindergarten. And it was held at night. Not during the school day. It was a big deal. And it wasn't part of the end of the year "Awards Day" schtuff.

I will be the first to say that I had never even heard of "graduating" from 6th or 8th grades, until I saw someone post it on this site. Those are bizarre to me. But Kindergarten is graduating from not-full-time-school, to full time school. Their whole school experience changes after Kindergarten. I suppose in some places (particularly in public schools) that isn't the case anymore. But it was for me and for my children. Kindergarten was a half day thing. Very different than first grade.
If your kindergarten is full day and really no change from being in first grade, and they hold the graduation during the regular school day, then maybe they don't treat it as formally as what my family experienced. With caps/gowns et al.

Yes, I think something like this is important to your child. We attend as much of this stuff as we can as two full-time working parents. Of course, you do have to have a flexible workplace to do this as well.

We also "level" with our kids about some of this stuff. We tell them that we do the best we can to be involved but we just can't do everything. We explain the reason why we work so that we can have a place to live and food to eat. They have little ceremonies during the day to give out perfect attendance ribbons and honor roll ribbons. We typically do not go to those given the timing.

My daughter was Student of the Month for her class yesterday. Neither of us was able to attend. I feel awful about it. I just started a new job and was on travel all week...I was literally on a plane headed home during the ceremony. My husband had an early morning meeting that was already scheduled. We only got notification of this on Monday afternoon, when our week was already scheduled. We arranged for her older brother (who goes to the same school) to attend to support her. We are going out to dinner tonight to celebrate. Sometimes, you just have to do the best that you can.

Well it's so different than when we were kids. No matter how over the top things are today, it's all our kids know. So they've made caps in school and decorated them, practiced class songs for weeks and have made little invitations to bring home for their graduations. So to them - it is a big deal. They don't get that really, this is silly. To them - this is as big a deal as anything they've done. They hype that up at school - just like everything these days.

So - we make an effort. Mind you, ours have been after school in the evenings. I think it's kind of weird schools do stuff during the day - it just means that there will be kids who have no parents attend these things. Which ... I don't get. Seemed unnecessary to me.

My husband has a flexible schedule and my work place was quite understanding, so we probably would both have gone.

But only because we could make it happen. I think if one of us hadn't we'd just say "Dad/Mom had to work". We do that now. I can't always attend things because of my health, and they get it. You just take video and pictures.