My daughter will be two yo next month and still uses a binky. I know this is me and my husband's fault but we really want her to give it up before she turns two. We have tried many times using different techniques, but nothing seems to work. Should we just take them away and put up with the tantrums until she forgets about them, or is there an easier way that we just haven't found yet? She also isn't talking very much yet, so when she is upset or frustrated she screams and wines to get her point across.
Please help, any advice is welcomed.
C.
Thank you to everyone for the great advice. We ended up cutting her binky and telling her that because she was a big girl and has teeth, her teeth broke the binky. Right away she took naps without it, the nights were tough, but within 4 days she got fed up with it and threw it away herself. I think this was the best thing, now she says she is a big girl, and her baby brother can have a bink because he is a baby.
I suggest the binky fairy or cutting the tips of them also. Whichever one you think might work for your child. My daughter chewed on hers until there was a hole in it, then got mad b/c she didn't like the way it felt. She got to throw it away and the first night was kinda rough, but we made it through and she is now an almost 3 year old that talks and sings non-stop!
Hi,
My son was in LOVE with his Binky; i felt like it was his best friend. When he was alittle over two, i had tried many tricks--- none working. Basically, my son would figure out our tricks and yell at us until we returned the binky. One day i had enough of the binky, i secretly took a pair of sissors and cut the tip off. When he went to his crib to get his binky he put it in his mouth and it was broke. I told him he finally was a big boy and his teeth broke it. He took it to bed that nite (broken) and cried for 1/2 hour (not at us but the fact it broke and every Binky we would try would break also) Three nites later the binky was in the trash--he didn't want a broken binky. He is four now and to this day tells people about his teeth breaking the binky. Its my secret!
My kids all reacted differently to pacifiers. My eldest found a great deal of security in her pacifier and rarely went without it. Once she was 18 months, I chose to limit her use. She was allowed to have it at naptime and bedtime. Later, she was only allowed it at naptime. And then only when she was really ill or sleeping in a strange place (which was VERY rare.) She now has no need for it at all. And her teeth are straight and she talks like every other kid her age.
My second child, nursed for 14 months and she rarely used her pacifier so when 18 months came around, she had no need for it anymore. She gave it up willingly.
My youngest is 2 year old and has his at naptimes and bedtime only. But I don't think he will struggle too much when it is gone. Even now, we talk about how he doesn't need it anymore.
Along with limiting the usage time, I also tell them often that they are big kids and they don't need it anymore. I reinforce that they want it and that is okay, but they really don't need it. Eventually, I think the point gets across without to much hassle.
But the other aspect is, if you take it away and she throws a tantrum, DON'T GIVE IT BACK. I believe it giving it back would set a pattern into motion that would be a HUGE issue later.
Also, it may be hard for her to give up the pacifier (aka one source of comfort and security) when her brother has one.
I know you can do this. Eventually she will get over the loss and understand she is a big kid now.
Maybe try the Supernanny trick--give ALL the binkies to the Binky Fairy for babies who need them and the Binky Fairy can, in turn leave her a thank you note and a cute stuffed animal to replace it! I think cold turkey (with compassion) is the way to go. It may be a looooong few first nights, but it will work! Good luck!
Hi C.
My son was 3 when I finally stepped up and took the binky away. He only got it at naps and bedtime at that point, so I picked a Friday when we could all handle some sleep deprivation if it went that route. I chose an item I knew he would really like to get ( a fish for us) and told him that on Friday, he could go get a fishy if he traded his binky. I explained that it meant no more binky. I started telling him this on Monday, and by weds or thurs he was taking about no more binky and getting a fishy. Friday we went to the petstore with the binky in a baggie and the lady so kindly took the binky and gave him the fishy. At nap time, he cried for the binky, but he eventually went to sleep. At bed time, he cried for the binky and didn't want the fishy anymore either, but he eventually fell asleep. It was less than a week before he stopped asking for the binky. It was a bit heartbreaking for me. I did feel bad because I knew he just wanted the comfort of his binky so we spent a little extra time with him before bed and gently explained there was no more binky because he traded it for his fishy. Good Luck to you. It's not the easiest thing to do, but we know it's better for them in the long run.
A friend of mine went to Build a Bear with her little girl and let her choose a stuffed animal to replace her binkys. I'm not sure if they still allow it, but when it came time to stuff her bear they put all the binkys inside with the stuffing. She got to see that she still had her binkys, but couldn't put them in her mouth and mommy/daddy didn't have any more to give her (i.e. less tantrums & whining!). Maybe something along those lines would help. Good luck!
My daughter was still using a pacifier when we took her to the dentist at the age of 2. it was limited to bedtime only but the dentist told us to wean her off the sooner the better.
we went cold turkey immediately leaving the dentist office. we explained to her that the pac was for babies and she was a big girl now. It took about a week for her to stop asking for it. But I have to say ...that was one of the easiest things we've had to do. I thought it would be much more difficult.
I have heard of a few moms with friends of little newborn or smaller babies will tell the older child that this baby needs those binkies and it is up to them to pass them on. So recruit a girlfriend and take your child over to her home to drop them off for the baby.
