Help with Poop'n on the Potty!

My son will be 3 in November. He potty trained well but refused to go poopoo on the potty. The trick that finally worked for us was offering gummy worms. He doesn't get them for anything else, just going poopoo. He is in underwear fulltime now with no accidents.

First, I would stop giving her the pullups to poop in--explain to her the poop goes in the potty and she needs to start going poop in the potty--you may want to give her a couple of days to prepare--let her know that in 3 days--no more pullsups, talk about it before she goes to bed and the night before the big day say "tomorrow is the big day that we stop using pullups for pooping"--make it a big deal to her--also make a sticker reward chart ahead of time and show it to her as you explain that she will soon be using the potty only to poop in and that she will get a sticker for pooping on the potty.

Let her have some accidents--it's fine and a part of potty training--and when she does--help her clean up and take her to the potty and put the accident poop in the potty-wave bye bye...etc.
Soon she will learn that poop in the underpants is no fun-
give her a sticker for both trying to poop on the potty and actually pooping--give her another one for helping clean etc.
There are many steps in going to the potty--so reward her for each step. But have a friggin party if she actually goes poop on the potty-jump up and down and have a poopy dance! Pooping on the potty is FUN! Don't worry about make any huge reward--like a giant toy-you don't want too much pressure on her--you want her to WANT to go poop and not be scared. So make sure you are relaxed--give her the power to decide when she needs to go--don't bug her about it-she knows and tells you when she needs to go --so let her continue to do that--just no pullups.
Finally be patient--she'll get there!

HI M.,

If being consistent doesn't work you might have to "bring in the big guns". For some reason my son thinks that the doctor's word is law so the last time we were at the doctor's office he told my son that he was a big boy and he could no longer wear diapers or pull-ups. Because he was a big boy he HAD to use the potty. It really did the trick no more problems, no accidents. There may be someone that your daughter really listens to, a teacher, grandparent, or doctor. Trying getting this person to tell her it is expected of her now that she is a big girl. Maybe it will work for you too.

My 3 year old finally started pooping in the potty about a month ago. She would ask for a diaper and hide everytime until we told her no that she had to go in the potty.

Once I saw that she was running and jumping around holding it in I would take her to the potty. Sometimes she would cry and say no that she wanted a diaper and of course I would give in.

She finally went with her dad once he decided not to give in. She has been going ever since...but every now and then she has asked for a diaper.

Be prepared for accidents, they will happen. But set a date when diapers will no longer be allowed and stick with it!

I also bribed her with going to Disney World and getting a new Ariel doll that was on top of the fridge for the longest time...that didn't really work...consistency from us was what finally got her to go.

Good luck!

My suggestion would be to reward her with a big prize when he goes poop in the potty. I would not consider it a bribe so much as a reward for a job well done. A bribe you would give before she goes, hoping it will make her want to, a reward comes after the task is complete. I think the reward needs to be immediate (not a future trip to Disney,or a promise of picking a toy at Wal-Mart) and special (not the same old little treats she sees all the time).

Here's how it went for me: My son was competely trained on pee-pee by 2 1/2, but our final hurdle was getting him to go poop in the potty. He just wouldn't do it, no matter how much I pleaded with him. Similar to your situation, he only wore pull-ups at night, so he would either wait until he had the pull-up on and go poop at night or he would hold it as long as he could, and then he would ask me to put a pull-up on. I would let him, becuase I wanted him to go, not hold it. Then one day, I finally refused to get a pull-up and told him he HAD to go in the potty no matter what. Instead, he figured out how to get one of his little brother's diapers out of the drawer and diapered himself!

Candies and stickers and such did not work for us either. He needed more motivation. So, we bought him a special toy (nothing outrageous - a toy train for about $25, but big enough that it is something he would normally only get for Christmas or birthday otherwise, so he knew this was a special occasion). We showed it to him in the evening (around the time he would normally ask for a pull-up). He got very excited, and then I explained that we would only open the toy if he went poop in the potty. He decided he would try, but he didn't go (I think he thought just trying would get him the toy) so, no toy. We put it away in the closet unopened and told him that we could try again tomorrow. He was determined though, and tried again, and sat on that potty until he went. We sang the potty song (something I just made up), did the potty dance, gave him the toy and made a big deal out of it.

At bed time, we put the toy away, and told him that it was special and he could only play with it after going poop in the potty. So, the next night he was excited to go poop in the potty and get to play with his toy again. He liked the idea that it was special that way. Also, I made sure that his little brother was not allowed to play with it, so that made it even more special to him. He went on for about a week and eventually stopped asking for the toy after every poop, but continued to be fully 100% potty trained since then and has not once asked for a pull-up. He can play with the toy all the time now, and is proud of himself and even tells everyone "I'm potty trained!" Honestly, I think they just have to get used to it for a while, and then they make the connection that it's what they have to do.

Also, once he had pooped in the potty, I eliminated diapers and pull-ups altogether, even at night, so as not to even give him the option of falling back on them. My husband thought he should have pull-up at night until age 4, but he has done just fine. Over three months now, and no accidents.

I also really like the idea the other mom had about cutting a hole in the pull-up. That's a great idea. You may want to try that first. Good luck!

M.,

I had the same problem with my now 5 (will be 6 on monday) year old son. To get him to poop on the potty I did the unthinkable. I made him run around the house naked for a week straight. I know that it sounds a bit bizarre but it worked for me. Any time that he had the urge to pee or poo he went straight for the potty. This is how I will more than likely train my 3 year old as well.

Good luck.

S.
SAHM of 3 boys 13, 5 and 3

M.-

My daughter went through the same thing. I had spoken to her doctor and this is what he told me to do. Does your daughter enjoy going to school? I had to tell my daughter that if the others at school knew that she would not poop on the potty, then she would not be able to go to school. My daughter loved school so much that she never poop in her panties again. Not sure if it will work for you, but it is worth a try. Maybe even keep her home the next day if she does not go on the potty. Not sure if that situation is possible for you. Let me know what happens. Good luck.

Blessings,

S.
www.youravon.com/srobida

Hi M.,
I didn't have this issue with my kids, but I read someone else's suggestion in another post on this site (a few days back there were several questions about potty training.. you may want to browse them for ideas). The suggestion was to let them poop in the pull-up. Then have them sit on the potty while they poop in the pull-up. Then cut a hole in the bottom of the pull-up and when they have to poop, sit on the potty (with the pull-up with the hole in it still on). Then after that, they were able to get rid of the pull-ups altogether...

Like I said, I have never used this or heard of it before, but someone did, and it worked for them. So... just tossing out ideas here....
Good luck..

Hi M.,
I use a little seat that I put on the toilet for my son who is now three. He is scared of pooping in the potty without using it, because maybe he feels he might fall in. Anyway, it might be comforting for her if she had a smaller seat to sit on. When I go on vacation, we bring the seat-top with us.
Good luck!
C.

Bare bottom worked really well for us too! We had a couple of partial accidents (you have to expect it & can't get upset w/her) and then he would run for the potty.

I agree with one of the other posters. Just tell her she is a big girl now (maybe make up a little ceremony and give her a special ring or neclace or something else "big girl" and tell her there are no more pull-ups. May Pull-ups are the hardest thing for potty teaching! They really make it hard to transition ... less to clean up, but then there are these problems you describe.

Cold turkey with the pull-ups is likely your best option at this point.

Best of luck!

She knows if she holds it until the end of the day, you will give in. Your daughter knows her mama very well. I have 2 daughters who were both potty trained by their second birthday. I am now potty training my third child (a boy) who is 25 months old.

The problem I can say you are having is that there is no consistency. Pull ups are fine for those accidents that are bound to happen but if she is using them consistently to go poopy, then you have just traded a diaper for a pull up and I don't see the difference between the two. My son wears a diaper at night, although most nights he keeps it dry. I am a stay at home mother, so I have the advantage to let him run around naked all day long. When he has to go, he lets me know and I reward him with a Gerber gummy treat. You are going to have to stop giving her a pull up. Stop buying them, hide them...whatever you need to do to not let her see them but you need to let her know that she's a big girl and big girls go potty on a toilet...not in her underpants. I wouldn't suggest yelling at her but I would let her know that you are disappointed if she poops in her underwear again. She's almost 3 and she should be accustomed to using the toilet by now. Be consistent...but most importantly, be persistent. Giving her a pull up to go poopy in it is the same as saying that it's OK to poop in the diaper. She needs to know that it's not OK.

For me, I had to constantly put my son on the potty and let him be in the bathroom with myself and my daughter so he could see it was normal to poop on the potty.

You just have to be consistent and don't give in! If she poops in her underwear she needs to know that she has done wrong. I taught my son it was wrong by explaining to him where we go to the potty and making him clean out his underwear. He didn't like cleaning them so he eventually chose to go to the bathroom on the potty and nowhere else.

Good luck!

S.

Hi M.

Sorry I am not responding to offer help, just to let you know I read your story and just got finished writing my own, which is very similar to yours. Please read it, mine is S. D. "Potty Training". My daughter will be 3 in December and she is the same as your daughter only she refuses to even put pee in the potty and is similar in the way that she will hold both pee and poop for so long!!! I guess I am just writing you to say you are not alone. Good luck and keep us posted.

Hi M.,

Try changing her diet. Add more fiber to make her go. She may have had a really hard time on the potty and assoiates it with the potty. By changing the diet, adding more fruits and Vegs she will be able to go more easily. By changing her diet you will be able to put her on the potty after every meal. She should be pooping as many times a day as she eats.

C.