Help Trying to Potty Train a Boy!

My first was a boy and I tried so very hard to potty train him but he was not interested; what did happen was that he became very constipated and I had to use suppositories to help him go. He was 4.5 when he finally did #2 in the big boy toilet and that was because he was starting Pre-K. Don't rush it, he'll be potty trained before he graduates from college! Boys are a bit harder to train than girls.

M.
Mom of 3 boys and 1 girl

I have a 3 year old little boy who potty-trained in one day, 2 weeks after his 3rd birthday. I had been trying on and off since he was 18 months old, feeling pressure from everyone else that it was "time" for him to be potty trained or that he was "smart enough" to go to the potty (when asked why he didn't go to the potty by a lady at church he responded, "I'm not potty trained yet."). I discussed it with my pediatrician and his advice was not to push it, to totally follow my son's lead and keep everything very positive. I was relieved to hear his advice and so glad that I did wait until my son was ready. It made the whole experience very pleasant for both of us. Basically we got up one day and he had a dry diaper. So I asked him if he wanted to try to use the potty. He tried but nothing happened. I set the kitchen timer for 15 minutes and before the buzzer even went off, he came and said he had to go. He was so proud of himself (and of course I made a huge deal about his accomplishment of listening to his body's cues and following through), and it encouraged him to try again to listen to his body. I set the timer for 30 minute intervals after his first success, but didn't even need the timer by the afternoon as he was telling me before the timer went off.

As far as the cup, I let him practice sometimes at home so that when he is in the situation to where he needs to use a cup he can, but still have him using sippy cups since it is simply a cleaner day for me when he uses his sippy cup. If other people want to insist on 2 year olds drinking from cups, let them be the ones to clean up the spills! I personally don't believe their motor skills are developed enough to master drinking from a cup without spilling once in a while.

I hope that you won't let the pressures coming from other people get to you - just listen to your son and follow his lead - with some guidance and encouragment from you, of course. Good luck!

Hi M....I live in Auburn too!

It isn't because they go to daycare. Both of my two oldest boys potty trained at 2 years 6 months exactly, wearing underwear day and night. I homeschool, they've never been in day care let alone 'babysat', but a few times that I can count on my fingers.

My girl will be 3yo next month and shows no interest at all. She doesn't care if she pees on herself. So, she is not ready at all. I'm going to try again after she turns 3yo next month.

Kids are different. They're ready, when they're ready. My boys, I taught them to sit down and go potty. No use giving them all the rules at once! lol. I also bought a lot of hot wheel cars and put them in a bag and let them have one every time they went potty. With my oldest, I had to set a timer, because he drank so much and couldn't hold himself for long periods of time (not that they should anyway). My 2nd son could hold it longer (still can, which isn't good for UTI's), so he didn't have to go as often.

Hopefully my 3rd son will be easier than his sister...oh I can only hope. Good luck with the potty training.

Now, as far as the sippy cup thing.....there is nothing wrong with your son still using a sippy cup. Our boys still used them when they were 4yo and up! Could they use a cup without a lid? Yes! BUT, we didn't want them roaming around the house without a lid on their cup! Our kids learned to drink out of a cup without a lid about 18 months old. But, they still used a sippy cup when going about the house. Our 3yo girl right now, drinks quite well out of a cup without a lid (she gets ours all the time), but when she is done drinking, she loves to pour it all out, if we aren't looking.

That could be one thing that they are just wondering about..if he can drink out of a cup that doesn't have a lid. Our kids learned in nursery at church at 18 months old when they went in. The nursery would have little tiny 'bathroom' cups half way filled with water. They learn.

I have 2 girls and my sister has 2 boys. The girls learn a lil' faster than the boys did. Her oldest and my oldest are the same age and it took him a little longer than her. All kids learn at their own pace... try not to worry about the other kids. Just be patient...

Hello M.,

I have a 3 1/2 year old boy who is going to be 4 in May. He had little to no interest at 2 1/2 to use the potty. We would talk about it (talked ALOT!), and he knew what the toilet was about but just wasn't interested. Then right after he turned 3, he started taking his diaper off and going into the bathroom. I followed his lead and after that it took about a month and he was daytime potty trained.

Please don't worry about your son! I think people put too much pressure on children to be potty trained too early. It's a really hard task to learn and every child is different. Some children are okay with being wet and other times they aren't and want to learn quickly. It's all up to what personality your child has (My son didn't care one bit if he was wet or stinky!! :) ) Plus, you do not want it to become a power struggle trying to force him. Just give him some time and he will become interested.
He is going to do great! I promise you, if you wait a little bit longer potty training will be really easy. Don't let anyone make you feel like you aren't doing the right thing, trust your Mommy instincts!
I hope this helps!
R.

P.S.
My son still drinks out of a sippy cup! He knows how to use a topless cup, however, I agree with the other post. I don't want him wandering around the house with out a top on that cup, my carpet's have already suffered enough :)

Try not to worry about it. Many kids aren't trained yet (especially boys). My son didn't potty train until he was 3, and at that point there were many other boys in his class at daycare that still weren't trained. If you wait until they are ready, training isn't that difficult and doesn't take very long. With my son, I just reached a point where I was done with diapers, and knew he could do it since he stayed dry throughout the night, so I took away the diapers cold turkey. He was completely trained (day and night) within a week.

They shouldn't expect a 2 1/2 yr old to be potty trained yet. Every school/church program I know of doesn't expect it until they enter the 3 yr old class. I don't think my son was potty trained until the summer before he started the 3 yr old class and he was 3 1/2. I thought he was going to wear diapers to college!!!! On the other hand, my daughter was completely potty trained (day and night) 2 months before her third birthday. She is in the 2 yr old class (late birthday) and there are several in her class that aren't potty trained. Also every school I know of prefers a Sippy cup to prevent spills.

My biggest suggestions are if there is another male he can go with, take him every single time and don't use Pull-ups or things like it. Use cloth. The Pull-ups don't make kids uncomfortable enough to learn. I switched my daughter to hemp diapers at about 18 months and it didn't take long for her to figure out that she didn't like the wetness next to her skin. She's been daytime potty trained for quite sometime now, including going out in public. I know that girls tend to train faster but I do know that the above work (I also have four older children, three of which are boys). One other thing that I did with all of my kids was let them pick out their potty. My last one was the only one to pick one out and NEVER use it other than to stand on it to get to the "big potty."