Help on Potty Training - Tried Everything

Have you tried letting her read or color while sitting on the toilet/potty chair? My son prefers guitar magazines, but also loves to read potty books and other books. Works like a charm! He gets 1 sticker for pee and 2 for poop. He's fairly regular so I usually have an idea of when he'll need to go. If I think he might need to go, I'll set him on the potty for pee and then ask him if he has to go poo-poo as well or just pee. He lets me know either way and will ask for his books or a magazine if he needs to go. Also, since he's still kind of short (he's not quite 2.5 and has always been on the small side), I give him a little step stool to put his feet up and it gives him more leverage. Hope this helps! Good luck. E. :)

Same thing happened with my daughter, except I knew she COULD go in the toilet because she went once or twice when she was 2 1/2. So here's what I did. For a few months before she turned 3, I told her exactly when she turned 3, she can't go poop in the diaper anymore. I told her every day or two, and she agreed that she wouldn't. Then her birthday came. She tried to go poop on the toilet but it wouldn't come out. I stood firm, no more diaper. Next day, she tried to go, no poop. By day three, I called the doctor because I did not want to back down. They suggested glycerin suppositories. I bought them, and luckily my daughter let me insert one - I told her it would help her go poop. She wasn't constipated, she just needed a little help! After 5 min, she had to go poop, and she went in the toilet! That's the first and last time we used the suppositories, and she's gone poop in the toilet ever since. Sometimes kids just need a little help, and suppositories are very safe, just soften the stool a little.

This may sound really gross... but you should take her to the bathroom with you and poop.. and let her see.. that's what I did to get the ball rolling because my daughter was scared to poop. She was so excited to pee and very confortable with that.. but just sooo terrified to do #2 (that she even became constipated b/c of). I knew she usually went #2 in the afternoon so I woudl sit her on the toilet and take the portable dvd player in there for her to watch and relax (my husband's idea -he's a tv freak btw-but it worked!). The first few times she would try to jump of the toilet realizing something was happening and i would hug her and comfort her. Also, because she was scared to go poop & got a constipated I would give her lots of fluids and other things to make it softer & I even put vaseline on her butthole so it wouldn't hurt when she finally did go.
I know it can be challenging but it feels soooooo good once she gets it down. Stick in their and good luck!!!

Hello J.:

Well as u can see there are several ways of doing this. First let me tell you my daughter pooped in the toliet at the age of 4, now. Technically potty training does not end until the child turns to 5 because sometimes that is how long it take kids. Each child is different but this is very common for girls to do this even though u do hear that boys do this more often. So frustration is the most common key but u r not doing nothing wrong. She is not ready and that is the truth. What I have read doing my research that most children feel that they are losing a part of themselves. Because she sees her pee leaving the toliet, to her it disappears. First to get her use to the toliet. Move her gradually to the bathroom. What I mean by that is tell her she has to poop in the bathroom. Let her know that is where we go. She may refuse and u may see her scared. Just ease her into it. Let her poop but get her use to doing it there and make it a big great thing. When she does give her praise. Then once she starts to go to the bathroom to poop, then get her use to pushing while she is touching or holding on the toliet. This may sound crazy but believe she was sooo afraid to touch it while she poop (my daughter). Then once she is use to that, then ease her to get use to pushing w/diaper on the toliet seat. That may take a moment b/c it did for us. But then once she is use to that, without her seeing it, cut a hole on her diaper so when she pushes, her poop will go into the toliet. Give that a try. If you have not gotten a little toliet, see if you can get one. I borrow one from my sis-n-law but I had that there just in case she decided to use that instead. Sometimes that may work. But remember that this is very common for kids and don't make it a bad thing b/c if so, it will be harder for her to poop. I wish u luck!!!

My grandaughter was about 3 & 1/2 when she just got up one day out of the blue & started going in the toilet & refused to wear a diaper. She was in extreme pain for many months with JRA so we did not push the issue. She just let her mom & dad know one day that she had had it with diapers. It was the weirdest thing! All kids learn at different levels. She'll be o.k.! Good luck! C.

have u pooped in front of her? let her see that it goes in the toilet? have u talked to her about it? my son went w/ me to his new school and heard me talking to the teacher about how he doesn't tell me when he has to go..and right after he heard me talking about it w/ the teacher and heard her input he started telling me. Is she in school yet? could help to see the other kids..also take her poop diaper and show her how u put the poop in the toilet
tell her she smells stanky w/ the poop in her pants..i did that to my son..we call poo "a stanko" ..ever since my son started 2 1/2 days a week at preschool he hasn't had one accident..he's just over 3..and he was a poo smearer..and all kinds of ick w/ it.

So is she just holding it in, or is she waiting for you to put a diaper on her?

My older son had the same issue. He would beg and beg for a diaper so he could poop. One day, when I knew he really had to go, I just refused. I said "There's the toilet - you know what to do." I was pretty sure he wouldn't poop on the floor. He waited about half an hour (during which I pretty much ignored him), but eventually he went in the toilet. And then we made a big celebration. No problem since then.

Hope that helps.

It is very common for them to master peeing in the toilet long before they are ready to go #2 in the toilet. She may just need more time.

Hey there.

I had this exact problem with my son. He actually had so much anxiety about pooping in the potty. With my son, he had tried to go in the potty early on in training and had 2 "bad" experiences. He is big for his age and when he sat on the training potty, the hole was too small and the poop got on him. He has always had a sensitive gag reflex, so it was almost traumatic.

So, I let him pick a toy at Target and put it up in the bathroom. Every day I encouraged, not demanded, that he try to go poop in the potty to get his toy. When he pooped in his diaper, I reminded him that "poop doesn't go in the diaper, it goes in the potty."

As time passed, I put him in underwear, but he still wouldn't go in the potty. He didn't go in his underwear either. He was holding it until I put him in a diaper! The poor kid almost made himself sick because he was afraid to poop in the potty, even though he peed there consistently!

Finally, one day I sat him down and I went through a step by step instruction on how to poop in the potty "When you feel like you have to go poo poo, I want you to come into the bathroom, pull down your pants and underwear, sit on the potty, and let the poo poo come out. When it is done coming out, you say, 'Mom, I'm done' and I will come clean you. Try it. It is important that you let it come out in the potty so you don't get a tummy ache. You will see that it is much better than going in your diaper, and then you will get your toy!"

We went over the steps several times until he was able to repeat it back to me. He went in the potty the very next time and ever since.

Every child is different. As mom's we have to play detective sometime and get to the bottom of what is going on in our kid's minds. Good luck!

Hi J. Discipline, Discipline, Discipline, so far every mama source i have read on unsccessful potty traing has mentioned they tried everything but discipline. You say you find her in a corner, obviously she knows it's wrong or she would not be trying to hide it. Get firm, and you'll get results. J. L.

J.-
i know how you feel and i know this advice probably sounds crazy but it worked for my 2 older kids. both my boys did great going pee in the potty but #2 was difficult. luckily it was warm enough to let them run without clothes in the back yard so that is where they started going. they were only about 18 months because they refused to wear diapers so they didn't really understand but they did want privacy so by 2 years old they ended up going in the toilet so they could get some privacy.
i hated throwing away underwear and i was not going to clean them out so scooping the mess off the grass was no biggy. if i could do it for the dog i could do it for my boys.
my cousin also had this problem but her daughter had a very hard & painful bowel movement once and after that she was scared to go in the toilet so that was a very different process. if your daughter is frightened you should talk to her about it if you think she can communicate well enough with you.
good luck and be patient potty training is so hard!!