Help!!! I Think My 13 Yr Old May Be bi-polar...need Input from Moms Familiar.

My 20 year old daughter is not bi-polar but she has bi-polar tendencies. I tood her to see David Missimo, a psych in Plano and he is marvelous!! His phone number is ###-###-####

I am not a doctor, but do have experience with bipolar depression. This does not sound like it to me, rather more of an anxiety disorder and inability to control anger, but of course I don't know everything that is going on with your family. You really only mentioned the anger part, are there also times that she is completely happy without a care in the world? Bipolar Depression is just that, two opposite moods that come and go without rhyme or reason. Bipolar people can actually be very fun to spend time with - until you realize exactly why they are like that. "Delusions of grandeur" are also an earmark. Does she really believe she is better/smarter/more beautiful, etc than everyone else (at least at times. One other thing that is common in bipolar is sexual promiscuity. I don't want you to take that the wrong way, but please watch her carefully if you truly think it is Bipolar disorder. That can obviously snowball into other issues. The disorder takes away their ability to understand or see risks in their decisions. Those suffering can feel invincible. Then of course when they hit a low, everything hits them at once. It is an awful disorder and I pray this is not what is causing your daughters issues. If you need anyone to talk to, feel free to message me.

I don't have medical experience, however i have been diagnosed as bipolar and adhd. I was actually diagnosed late in life at the age of 27, i had anger and behavioral issues since i was a young child. But i hesitate to accept my diagnosis, b/c everyone insists on taking medications, and in some cases several medications. I have been asked how i lived all these years w/out medications. That worries me...i think too many people over medicate themselves by instructions of a psychiatrist or doctor. I found myself experimenting with drugs that left me feeling like i had no self control of myself, even to the point of sleeping in my car at work b/c i couldn't keep my eyes open. I obviously have a slight disorder w/ bipolar symptoms but i have found that my ultimate remedy that works for me is counseling. When i was young, i would have mood swings from extremely happy to severly depressed in a matter of moments and the most frustrating part for me was not knowing why? My father passed away when i was 8 and i was angry at the world. I think alot of my anger stemmed from that, but there was a lot of unexplained anger. I got into a lot of fights when i was growing up. My biggest struggle today is anxiety and stress. Everything is 100 times worse for me than the average person. Meaning i freak out over the smallest things. I go 100mph everywhere i go. It is so frustrating and hard to deal with(for my husband that is) but he say's it's just who i am and he deals with it. (love him for that) nobody wants me to slow down more than "me". I consider what i have to be a chemical imbalance of some sort, i believe it is hereditary, my father was the same way, his sister, my brother and one of my sisters all show signs of this behavior. I now have a son who is three, he displays alot of anxiety and stress that i recognize in myself when i was young. It makes me very sad that he will struggle with some of the same things i do, but i am glad that we share the same behaviors, so i can maybe help him get through the hard times. There were times when i was growing up that i would lock myself in the closet, cry and hit myself b/c i was so frustrated with my own feelings of confusion and anger. So please please try and be patient with your daughter. My mother would just give me time and space. She wouldn't get upset with me! She would try and offer help, but nothing did. (don't beat yourself up about getting frustrated with your daughter, it is tough when you don't understand why she is behaving that way) but just try and understand that she feels just as frustrated if not more, trying to understand herself. Please get your daughter some counseling....just to vent. She needs it. I saw a counselor my whole life, not all the time, just when i was in a rut. I am 27 years old w/ three children, a wonderful understanding, calm husband (who completely balances me out) and an even more incredible counselor that makes me feel normal. She always talks me donw from crazy! I wish you the best of luck and if you are interested in the name of my counselor please let me know. You will get through this...you just have to remember one thing....your daughter does not want to hurt you, it is not personal....she is angry and she doesn't know why! Just be patient and this doesn't mean giving in to her every desire, it just means don't take it personal...i know it can be painful....just stand your ground and offer help. With her age you could start experiencing anxiety attacks....shortness of breath, irritableness, and lots of crying....just rub her shoulders (light massage) milk always calmed me down during an episode, and instruct her to breath slow deep breaths until she can gain control. This is so important for her to see you trying to make her feel better. Good luck mom....don't ever give up....she has hope! You are her hope! Sincerely, I.

Bipolar is different in kids than adults - they rapid cycle so may not seem to ever be anything but manic. She may also be being abused....my kid was thought to be bipolar and it turned out was being abused by a trusted friend/pastor. She needs help. You said you 'went after her' when she said she hated you....I am not sure what that means but probably not the best response. As to the meals, I would not let them fix what they want - the meal is the meal in our house - eat it or wait until the next one......I am single mom to two teens as well........my best to you

Hello L.,

I don't know about BP but it sounds like when my sound is going through High fructose corn syrup "withdrawal". I know it will be difficult to find out what she eats or does not eat at school. sodas and most "juice" drinks will have it. and even bread and apple sauce! it's very hard to find sweets without artificial sweteners. My best advice is to leave no stone unturned. check diet, nutritional deficiencies, hormonal inbalance, etc. Good luck! ~C.~

I spent seven years with a bipolar man and this is not bipolar disorder... this is out of control anger. Get her some counseling right away, there are plenty of programs thru MHMR if you cannot afford one. Good luck. My prayers are with you!

A roommate of mine in college was bipolar and what you describe doesn't sound like it at all. People who are bipolar go between happy/euphoric and upset/depressed/angry very quickly. For example, my roommate came into the room dancing around about having a date and the world was perfect to falling into a puddle on the floor in tears because she didn't have anything nice to wear on her date and she just knew he wouldn't want to date her if she didn't have nice clothes. Her mood swings were like snapping my finger. One minute great, next minute awful. If your daughter gets angry/violent and then immediately cries or apologizes or acts like nothing happened, that might sound more like bipolar. But, then again, I'm not a doctor or psychologist.

hey well i would for sure have her get a psych evaluation. i have an 8 year old who acts just like that, and has been since age 1 or 2. my other daughter is 5 and nothng like that so calm and sweet. so i have been going through this, i was also a very out of control teen and had my kids very young and am now divorced. but i have a great boyfriend who helps alot, and it has cause some major issues she hates everyone everything and never seems happy. i worry what it will be like as a teen. but first step is definatley getting an evaluation, and maybe medication it sounds crazy but i just started mine on some and it has improved (in school only) so who knows.... at that age they know the limits and obviosuly some kids cant help the way theyre head is working or dont care.. its so hard but youll see when u start getting answers from a dr. good luck!!

L.,
I feel for you. It's really hard to deal with a situation like this.... I don't know if she's bi-polar. I'm not a doctor. But she has issues.

There's a website where celebrities talk about their disorders, as a public service to help others. It's geared towards colleges kids called "half of us". Here's one of the clips..
http://www.mtvu.com/video/?id=1557046&vid=143163

Maybe watching some of these will give you some insight to how your daughter might feel. Yet, it might not be bi-polar. It might be oppositional defiant disorder which I've heard of and don't know what it is.... here's a link.
http://www.mental-health-matters.com/disorders/dis_detail...

I would ask less of her for now. Till you figure out what's going on. She's 13 she can make her own dinner, so suggest to both girls that they make their own for awhile because you've run out of ideas. Ask them to give you a list of things they want from the store and get them. Just try to reduce the stress. For you and for her.

Almost sounds like my daughter! We're in counseling but nothing seems to help. Our main problem is I'll tell her "no" to something and she literally will not accept it and it gets blown way out of hand. Even her counselor is at her wits end. What was your daughters diagnosis?