Grandson Being Fed Once a Day

Yep...good choice...at that age, at least small portions of soft veges, small pieces of lunch meats, etc are appropriate...not just juices/milk until dinner! He may be very hungry as well and that many bottles (5) until dinner tells that fact!

I have worked in a daycare, in the infant room, this is from 6 weeks to a year olds. By the age of 1, ususally younger, they are eating at least cereal for breakfast, a fruit, at least, for lunch and supper. So, yes I agree with you, he deffinely should be eating more than once a day.

Hello J.,
My daughter is 18 months old and she is eating nothing but solids. She started eating solids around 9 months old. I would be concerned,too. She should be feeding her son some solids so he can start to get familiar with the solids. I started giving her a little hear and there then that is all she wanted! It is so convenient,too! I just prepare one dinner!!! Her favorite is Spaghetti and french fries.. It can be a pain in the butt to clean up after but he has to start to eat solids. To much milk and juice isnt good for the child anyway. My daughter just started eating her Cheerios with milk last weekend now that was a mess!!! Good luck Grand-mom!

20 pounds is not too small for a 13 month old. My son was maybe 21 pounds at that age. At 2, he's now 25 pounds. He wasn't always thin. At six months, he was a plump 18 pounds.

Other than talking to your son about it, there's not much that you can do.

I'd also like to point out that it's not just your daughter in law that's to blame for your grandchild not getting more than one meal a day. Fathers are every bit as responsible for their children as mothers are. There's nothing to stop him from feeding his child.

That baby should be off the bottle by now and eating all solid foods! Sorry to be so blunt! It sounds like to me that she just may be afraid to feed him like that cause she doesnt want to deal with the hassle of cleaning. Well my opinion with that is then she shouldnt of had kids. Cause for the first few years some of the best moments are of them making messes and learning from that. He needs to be eating a regular diet now, and should be on to sippy cups, they make them spill proof now!
Sorry to be so blunt but it almost sounds like she is depriving him of nutrients he needs. I would talk to your son.

I think your grandson is at a good weight. I don't know if I would get into it with them if I were you. He is prob eating more in the way of snacking all day. Some children don't slow down too much to eat. My 2 year old eats better on the go. I sit her down to eat three times a day, but she won't stay sitted to eat. At the age of your grandson, he's exploring his surroundings and prob eating on the go. You are not over there all the time to see what is going on. If he is not gaining weight properly the Ped will instruct your daughter-in-law.

I'm afraid you getting on you daughter-in-law would not be good for your relationship. Your son will take her side if anything would go that far. Something for you to think about.

Is she still feeding him baby food too besides the one meal of tabel food? That is expensive!! My son is 11 months and can eat over $20 in baby food in a few weeks!! My son is pretty much on talbe food all the time now. I would sit down with your son and explain to him your concerns and let him talk to her about it. If there still isn't a change then sit them both down together. It's not that hard to throw a frozen waffle in the toaster, cut it up in small piece and put a few on his tray and let him feed himself. Yes kids are messy and it's part of being a kid! You can also suggest to her the little nuke'um dinners that Hormel makes. Mac'n cheese, spaghatti O's, etc. They are cheaper than the Gerber graduates and taste better too!! You can find them in the can soup isle by the Chef boyaredy stuff. Also, are they on WIC? If they haven't tried to see if they can, they should. It will provide them milk (he should be on whole milk till he is 2yr old), juice, eggs, cereal, etc. And she will have to go to food and nutrition classes every few months as part of the program.

Sit down with both of them if you don't notice a change after a while. If possible, go with her to his 18 month check up and bring up food and nutrition to the Dr. And if she thinks a 13 month is messy, have her try a 11 month and a almsot 7yr old!! hehe But 20lbs isn't too thin for his age as long as he has been on the same weight gain curve since birth. My daughter was only around 20 lbs at that age too (7.3 at birth) but my son is my chunker at 20 lbs at 9 months (7.9 at birth)!

Here is a link to food and nutrition for kids that has a bunch of other helpful links. http://www.keepkidshealthy.com/toddler/feeding_your_toddl...

Good luck to you!!
S.

Hi Jennifer,

You don't say how old your grandson is. That would be a deciding factor. I would probably say something to my son snyway. He may need to talk to the child's doctor if his wife won't do what's best for the child.

Try talking to your son. Come at it from a only want whats best for your grandchild, mention you understand they are the parents and you respect that, so you dont lose them from the beginning of the conversation. When it comes down to it though, the most important thing is your grandson's health. Healthy eating habits start early, and you can't survive on juice and milk alone. One meal a day is not enough for a developing body and brain. The early years so many important skills (both physical and mental) are learned; skills needed for the rest of your life. You need energy to be able to learn and grow and play. Sounds like you have to risk upsetting your children in this situation. Don't let it slide. Maybe your daughter in law needs a break, some time to herself. The comment "its a hassle" sounds like she may be getting overwhelmed. Employ yours sons help to help her de stress. Hope that helps good luck.

Is shea member of a local mom's group? I know my mom's group would sugguest to her that it is time to move on and start him on soilds. It is harder to hear things and take advice from family then from a group of other moms. Just a thought. Or have you asked if you could go to his doctors appt? And see what the doctor says about his weight. It is always how you word it. I went with my sister when I had similar problem with my nephew and I just asked the doctor a bunch of different question(beat around the bush). Then i asked what an idea diet plan is and how you ease into it? My sister didn't get mad, she actully listened and took the paperwrk they had.

My son is 13 months and only weighs 20 lbs, but he eats and eats. He is on milk and eats toddler meals and regular soilds. However all my kids are small, but healthy.

T.
mother of 3- leader of a local SC mom group

If you want you can tell her about me & my son. He is 4 and a half and has always perferred to drink milk or pedisure it got so bad that i would be exstatic if I got him to eat two or three bites of solid food. He went almost a year without (really) eating. If she thinks it's a hassle now it just gets worse.

I can't believe that she is only feeding him once a day, my soon to be 1 yr old (in one week) eats at least 3 large meals and 2 snacks a day. And about 3-5 bottles a day. I would sit them both down and talk with both of them at once. They should both be making sure that he's getting fed addequately. There are a lot of finger foods that arent' messy at all. You have every right to be concerned. I hope that this talk goes smoothly for you.

i totally agree with you. This eventually vould affect his growth not only physically but mentally!!!
check out this websight and email it to her too if need be! This is not about her but the developament of the child!
http://kidshealth.org/parent/growth/feeding/feed12yr.html

I hope you can get through her if the child is hungary that is a bigger problem but differentf oods need to be introduced to expand there tastes~ It's on the sight too.

Take care and I hope you get through to her!

jennifer, as a mom i wouldn't even wait to talk to my son, this is your daughter in law and yes you may be overstepping boundaries but if she gets mad oh well. this needs to be explained to her that thsi child needs more than bottles to strive at this age. if your around don't ask just give your grandchild a meal. sooner or later he will get use to meals 3 times a day and a bottle just won't do anymore than if she thought that was a hassel wait until he cries all the time for foor. you can also sugguest to start to little toddler finger food, all she has to do is is watch. i'm sorry if this offends you but that just pure lazy on her part. i love my in law but if stepped in than i wouldn't have anything to say, i may complain to my husband but its time for grandma to the rescue.

WOW! At 13 months, this child definitely should be on at least 3 solid food meals a day. Imagine trying to make it on 1 meal a day!! Maybe you should tell her to do the same for herself and see how she feels. Not only is he not getting the proper nutrients, but he's also not going to have enough energy. Milk is great and has good nutrients. Juice is really not that great! Kids really just need a little. 20 lbs is a decent weight, but that does not mean he's eating well. I would definitely talk to them. He needs more food than that. I'm a mom and I know how grandparents can get annoying at times, but when they are doing things like that, something needs to be said. You may even want to call their doctor and share your concern. He/she may not be aware of the meals, for she may not be sharing that info with the doctor.

my son will be 5 months on Sunday the 29th and he eats 3 times a day with 4 milk bottles and 1 juice bottle during the day also. He also weighed 16.8 lbs at his 4mo appt. I would only imagine that a 13 mo old would def. be eating 3 times a day with snacks between! my friends son is 9 mos old and he eats just that and he weighed 22 lbs at his 8 mo appt. I would def. talk to your son about it, that baby needs to EAT!!

it's good to know that your grandson is healthy even though he is only getting one meal a day. i can't beleive that a mother would think that it is a hassle to feed her own child. at 13 mths he should be getting more solid food now instead of the bottle, which i think he should be off of anyway.why don't you let your daughter-in-law know that there are plenty of fast finger foods on the market that takes very little time to get together.or if you are close by, you could just feed him lunch yourself. good luck!

Up to a year, a child primarily needs breastmilk or formula and everything else is an extra, but at 13 months he should be eating 3 healthy meals a day, and not a ton of juice, which is full of sugar. It is hard to tell your daughter-in-law what to do, but I would appeal to your son.

Oh boy, that doesn't seem like enough at all. My daughter is 8 months old and ever since she was 6 months she's eaten solids twice a day. She's now up to solids twice a day with the addition of a snack around 2 in the afternoon.

Suggest that she ask her pediatrician what they think or there are a million websites that will tell you what is an apporiate amount for a child that age to eating.

His weight might be fine, but he needs more substance than juice can give him. Most juices are filled with sugar and don't come close to having the amount of vitamins and proteins that kids need.

You should ask them to cut out a couple of their meals and substitute with liquid...they may finally see what you're talking about.

if you have a goog relationship with your DIL i would bring it up gently not to the point where she would get upset.Then based on her response i would go to the son and tell him too. Then I will i will wait while we are together in the same room and bring it up again. My MIL will do that to me all the time, then she ask me if she can come to the DR. appointment and she will ask her own questioned. i open my eyes to see that she was not there for me but for her grandkids.

At 13 months, that baby needs to eat 3 meals a day, I know with my son, he had oatmeal or grits in the morning, at lunch it would be tuna or chicken salad, something in that form, and a normal dinner. Honestly, she is under feeding him, and it's not healthy, at all. (I'm glad that he's at a healy weight), but he needs his strength, and that comes from eating healthy. You need to speak up to her, or your son. Heck, show me someone who has a baby, and can name one thing that isn't a "hassle". If he's a hassle to change his diapers, would she stop that? Motherhood isn't supposed to be "easy", it's one big hassle, but you deal with it, otherwise, you don't deserve to have that "hassle" and enjoy it!

I am a mother of two and know about having to feed solids early. Both my sons had to be put on cereal immediately.I am suprised your daughter in law doesnt fid the bottle more of a hassle. I know I fed my sos less when I put them on solids because they were satisfied and full. the milk and juices didnt seem to satisfy them at all. I also believe that a child growing doesnt get all their nutrients from the juice and milk. I dont know if talking to your son will effect your relationship with your daughter in law or your son. But I know if I was that concerned I would tell him. When my first born was a baby my grandfather used to always get on my case about giving him more water. Being a first time mom and stubborn I didnt want to take his advise because I thought I knew what was best. But me and my grandfather got into it a little bit and then my mom and grandma sat down and talked to me about it and made me realize the importance. You might need to explain to your son and your daughter in law, that having a child changes your life extremely and for it to be a hassle for her to feed him solid foods she should have thought about how she would feel about inconveniences in her life before having a child. She should also think about how she would feel if she was fed milk and juices all day and was only given one meal at night of solids. The child is probably feeling the same way she would feel. I wish you all the luck. You are definetly stuck in a hard place but it really matters on how strongly you feel about the situation on whether you should pursue the matter further. I hope it works out for you.

Hi,
I would sit down and talk with both your son and your daughter-in-law. It may be something as simple as your DIL doesn't know what she can feed him and decides to avoid the issue. There are very detrimental side effects to being given juice to drink all day. It can slow and really screw up their metobolism, their adrenal glands, his kidney's, etc. It can also cause severe tooth rot. You may want to look offer to get her some baby care books or children cookbooks. I would also let them know that they can take their child to their prediatrician and get great advice on caring for a child. If she doesn't take care of her child now, someone is going to step in later on down the road and it will not have a good ending. Never be afraid to be a good parent or grandparent! These children are our future leaders!
Hope that helps,
Y.

Is he still on formula? He should be on whole milk by now which is not as filling or satisfying. I would talk to your son so he can address it with her and/or their pediatrician. The hard part is that for those of us that are new mothers (my daughter is 19 months) we sometimes feel as if we are criticized a lot so she may not be taking the advice that she should be for that reason.

Jennifer,

I think you are on the right track of talking to your son. My question there is is he fully aware of what his wife is doing?
I am sure the peditrican is unaware of the situation, when you speak to your son, maybe suggest they contact the doctor to help her understand that he is not getting the nutrition necessary for proper development. 20lbs sounds under weight for a 13 month old. Not only does he need lunch, but he needs breakfast as well. Breakfast is so important because he hasn't eaten for 12 or more hours. This is a very fragile situation. If neither of them will listen- can you speak to her parents with your concern? maybe you can even call the peditrican yourself with your concern. I hope this helps. please let me know. if you or they live in hampton va, there is a program called healty familys that could also help.

I am the mother of 2 children.
L.

I think I would say something. I can't even believe that a 13 month old isn't crying with hunger pains. My son can't go past 930 (he gets up around 8am)with saying he was hungry. Do you think the bottle is just easy??? I think at 13 months he should be off the bottle, sitting in a high chair, and eating 3 meals. She can feed him things like dry cereal at the high chair for breakfast. Also at lunch something like sandwich meat with a slice of cheese, and a cut up banana. None of this make a big mess. I also like my house clean, but I stop and feed my kids. I am guessing your daughter in law is a stay at home mom, and that your son works??? If that's the case, I'm sure your son isn't aware that she only feed him one meal. If you son wasn't home at dinner, I have to wonder if she would feed him that??? Also I bet she eats 3 meals. That poor sweet baby, has to watch her eat 3 meals and is most likely hungry. Also if you live close, and don't work. Maybe you could offer to come over and help her with making meals???? Good luck, and remember, that he's a baby and can't speak for his self. Therefor you need to speak for him. If this causes a riff in the relationship with the daughter in law, then so be it. At least you know that you are doing what's best for the baby. Again Good luck

I think you should approach your son with this and let him address it with his wife. I agree that by 13 months, a child should be eating solids more than once a day. Sometimes it is a hassle to clean up after your kids, but it’s just a part of having children. I don’t know anyone who has children and a perfectly clean house. You seem to have a good relationship with your DIL and seem to be caring and genuinely concerned for your grandson, but if you approach her directly, she may see it as you trying to interfere or criticizing her parenting skills. Make your son aware of the problem (if he isn't already) and put the burden on him to deal with it. Hopefully, he'll be able to help your DIL see the light. Good luck and keep us updated.

My son is 12 months old and he eats 3 meals a day and sometimes an occasional snack. I'm sorry, but if your daughter in law says its too much of a hassle to feed her child then its too much of a hassle for her to be a mother. I would talk to your son, if he resolves the situation.. great. If not I would be one that went after custody of that child myself.

Wow, this is awful. I think maybe you need to go to www.askdrsears.com or elsewhere and look up some facts that you can print off and give to her to read about baby nutrition. I breastfeed my 6 month old 4 times a day and she gets 4 solid food meals a day and eats all of it very heartily so I know this child must be hungry. You should definately talk to your son as well. Milk can cause allergies and juice can cause teeth rot and an addiction to sweet foods. This is no good. I'm sorry you are in this position. I hope that you can help!