Getting My 3 1/2 Year Old Tested for ADD.....Is It Really the Right Choice?

Updated on January 06, 2008
D.F. asks from Webster, NY
28 answers

everyone in my family keeps trying to pressure me into getting my 3 1/2 year old son tested for ADD. I had him enrolled in a really great preschool and that didn't work out because the felt he needed one on one attention because they couldn't control him. (this preschool i a co-op rprechool so parents also work in the class room as well a one teacher. i did have the opportunity to work in the class room once and there were quite a few children that didn't stay where they were told or do what they were told.) however, if i wanted the what they called "special needs asistant" to come in and be with him one on one i would have to have him tested by the school district. (he had also not been around as many children at one time as he was at school. i don't know many other people with children so he never really had experience with many other children. thta was one other thing that didn't help much)
The thing is I really don't want to get him tested i think it i too early for that. I was tested as a child and was diagnosed with ADD and come to find out the doctors were wrong and i didn't have it. i had somthing completely different but all through chool i had a hard timie with the fact that i was treated different from the other kids b/c of it. I was tested by the school district and then i was given an IEP that now to this day i have never used. (yes even in the college im attending they are giving me problems b/c of it) I don't want to see my son have the same thing happen to him. He is a wonderful child that gets a little overexcited at times and has a problem litening all the time. Most 3 year olds i know are the same way. Im just wondering if anyone has any suggestions as to what i can do/what options are out there. is testing good at this age or is it a good idea to wait? i just don't know what to do and i want to do whats best for my son. i just don't want to make the wrong decision.

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.R.

answers from New York on

I would not have him tested if he seems to respond normally at home. He may just be excited, and a little more wiggly then other kids. I would consider eliminating a lot of processed foods and sugar in his diet, a lot of kids have ADD like symptoms when they eat processed foods, especially with food dyes, corn syrup, and preservatives. But the less of that in any kid, the better, in my opinion.

I think my child would have to be pretty extreme, and no able to learn anything because he would not be able to settle down before I would consider drug intervention at 3 and a half.

We are so anxious to label kids that do not exactly conform. Consider this: A kid that is a little more active or more restless than the rest is also a sign superior intellgence. He could be getting bored, and getting in trouble because of that. Good luck.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.M.

answers from New York on

my daughter was dx'd at 4.5... she is very hyper... you couldnt miss it even at 3...
now she is 10 and re-dx'd as aspergers....
Institute for child deelopment at hackensack univ. med ctr is the best place for evaluations.... do not let the school do the initial evals, it will not be anywhere near as thorough thru the school.
we've done the meds too, but only for a trial last summer ( she was 9) and had horrible results... however i did insist on a pediatric cardiology study 1st with follow ups while on the meds... but after trying 3 meds we stopped ... the improvements in attention did not outweigh all the negative things it did to her..

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.N.

answers from New York on

ADD/ADHD cannot be a legal diagonosis (for schools anyway) until the age of 7. Most doctors won't/shouldn't entertain the thought of testing a child younger than this b/c it isn't considered to be diagnosable in the medical books until age 7.

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.C.

answers from New York on

Having been a preschool director--and mother of two special needs children--I strongly urge you to have your child tested. There is so much that can be done these days to intervene with children. Many resolve their "attention issues" and can enter kindergarden without special help. Would you deny your son that advantage? Yes, three year olds can be very "busy", easily distracted and active. But teachers generally have a good sense about what is normal and what needs further observation. Perhaps he is in a setting where there is too much expectation for him to sit quietly and focus. Perhaps he needs more physical activity in his day. Whatever it is, it's worth finding out if it is a problem and if he can benefit from intervention. The alternative might be to struggle all his school years and always be trying to catch up and to please others--without the ability to do so. He'll be different--without any support,resources or chance for adaptation or improvement. How painful would that be? There are so many special needs kids around these days--and great programs for them in public schools and in colleges. It would be irresponsible to ignore his needs. Meanwhile, love him, reinforce his positive behaviors and remind him of his special skills and abilities that he can be proud of.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.D.

answers from New York on

Coming from a family of ADD people, I would definitely say it's too early. I have an issue with the label of ADD as it is. People with ADD don't have a learning "problem", but rather a different way of learning. They tend to be more hands on and this causes a problem for teachers who need to teach a classroom of kids in the same manner. Your son is only 3 1/2 years old, all kids learn this way at three and a half. He probably needs constant stimulation which isn't a bad thing. Rather than thinking of him as hyper, think of him starving for knowledge. Let him explore the world, give him things to take apart and put back together, things to create. Give it time and you will see that this "problem" really is just a very bright boys way of letting you know that he's incredibly curious about the world around him.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.M.

answers from Buffalo on

A 3.5 year old may be to young to diagnosis with ADHD. Review the charactersitics for this disorder and then observe your child for a week or so. You may need to sit back and just watch his interactions with adults, children and when he plays alone. Then make an appointment with his doctor and discuss the matter. Based on your observation and information it will help with deciding to test your son. A 3 year old has a limited attention span and that is normal. I work in this field and most often they wait until a child is 5-7 years old to diagnosis children with certain disorders. It has been my experience that most children have been diagnosed properly today. I though have seen many adults (30+) be wrongly diagnosed in the past 10 years. The developing fields in OMH and OMRDD has come very far and the IEP system is much better. I have seen children move out of the IEP system after several years of successful integration into classrooms.

Take your time and do not rush into this as watching and observing your son is going to be more valuable information. Yet do not wait until he enters Kindergarten, especially if you do not see the behaviors/signs improving.Definately get him more exposed to childran and play group to determine if it is a lack of social skills because he has not had those interactions.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.P.

answers from New York on

Hi D.!

It seems that the advice that you have gotten so far is split down the middle between getting your son tested and not getting your son tested. The truth is, you know him best. I have been a school psychologist for 8 years now and have conducted preschool evaluations with our speech pathologist for the past four. I would have to say that in those four years (and over 100 evaluations) there have only been 2 three year olds that we have CONSIDERED to be ADD/ADHD. Both of those children had a handful of other things going on so they qualified for the program regardless of the attention issues.

With that being said, if attention/over active behavior is the only concern at this point, give him more time. This is his first experience with structured school expectations, if teachers are still expressing concerns by the mid-way point of kindergarten, then have him evaluated by the school system. He will have a more inclusive program and better support once he is in K-12 education anyway.

Good Luck!

H.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.D.

answers from Rochester on

Well my mother is actually a speech pathologist; she used to be a teacher at a school, but now she home schools children ages 0-5, befor they enter the classroom. My advise (and her's aswell), would be to go ahead and get him tested. He might not even have ADD, it sounds as if it might be ADHD My sister had ADHD, and never was treated differently, or had to be in different classrooms or recieve a different diploma. She wasn't diagnosed until high school. She was struggling in high school with her grades, but now that she nows how to deal with it, she has maintained a 3.8 GPA all throughout college. The test have come along way, and medication might not even be necessary. It is just better to catch it as soon as possible, as it is easier to work with. Alot of times it is just a matter of leaning and absorbing knowlege differnt then others. Another thing is, it is that it is really important that if he does have ADD or any learning disability, that he attends a school that has a desent program for this, and doesn't treat children differently. Hope this was helpful....Goodluck with everything!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.F.

answers from New York on

You do not seem to have noticed anything unusual with your son, at least you don't write about it. I would ignore all the "well wishers" and pushers (they are the same kind of people who will be asking "so when are you getting married"?). The diagnosis like this or even the test in the history can become a stigma difficult to get rid of. If you don't have any problems with your son - follow YOUR intuition! Stay strong and do what YOU feel is right. Even if it means sending him to another school. When I was in first grade my teacher told my mother than I am a problematic child and she should consider sending me to a special needs children school. The reson for that according to her was that my handwriting was very uneven and I was not focused during classes. My mother did not listen to this teacher, because she believed I was intelligent, bright child. By the end of the primary school (and to the rest of my education) I had straight A's and I am an MD. At the age of 7 I just happened to enjoy playing outdoors more than sitting in the classroom....
Good luck and stay strong!! Love your son and believe in him and in your gut feeling!!!!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.S.

answers from New York on

Bottom line is you are the mother. If you are not comfortable getting him tested and feel it is too young, then don't get him tested. I am a special education teacher and some of my students do function better on medication and can clearly see the difference when they were not given their medicine for the day. Some of my students are not on medicine and can function just fine. I am concerned about some of the behaviors when he is around other kids. It does sound like he needs some social skills. This can certainly be worked on with practice and perhaps a reward system set up at the preschool.

You clearly love your son. You do what is best for him and only you can decide that!

D.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.J.

answers from Albany on

Personally and professionally I think 3 is too young to be diagnosed with ADHD. Many preschool aged boys are typically overactive and may possess a particular learning style that may be perceived as ADHD - my 4 year old included. Fortunately I have plenty of experience with ADHD students to know that my son is not one of them.

My question to you is what were the teachers' education background at his former preschool? Often many preschools have teachers with little or no educational training or degrees - which is a shame. Preschool teachers without the experience and knowledge about child development may have a difficult time #1 devising methods to work with an energetic learner and #2 understanding typical behavior vs. atypical.

I do believe in early educational intervention and testing. It is beneficial to have children tested early to ensure greater success in school. I myself have referred 4 year old children for ADHD testing - but those behavior indicators were extreme.

With that my advice to you would be to talk to his pediatrician. Explain your own condition and experience and s/he may tell you if there is a genetic link and would be able to refer you best.

If the Dr. agress with ADHD testing at 3.5 then I would heed that advice so your son could get what he needs to succeed. It would be a huge diservice to your son not to get him help if he genuinely needs it because of your own experience.

Keep in mind that testing does not mean he will be diagnosed with it.

Should he be diagnosed with it you need to know that much has changed in the educational system since we were in school. Educators are trained to include children with IEP's similarly to children without without negative attention brought to that student. Labels are not the same anymore either. Having a correct diagnoses of ADHD will only help.

Please let me know if you need any further advice. I do wish you the best.

A.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.C.

answers from New York on

We live in a country that medicates our childen into zombie la la land....simply because it makes the situation easier. I'm tired of it and happen to think it's abusive to our children. Your child is bright and active...Thanks God and in the process is learning about things.
I tend to think we need to put our thinking caps on. Control your childs diet and remove all things that are loaded with SUGAR in it and make sure this child gets plenty of REAL physical exercise. No matter how busy you are, make more time for this child and ask family members, friends to do the same if you need help with this. Also find a pre-school who LIKES CHILDREN enough to work with them....That means a staff in the class room who's actually educated in child care and intertested in dealing with child development...and not interested in Medicating children to make their jobs easier.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

N.B.

answers from New York on

I don't know...
I don't think there is any harm in having testing done to check him out if you think he would benefit from one on one work. Taking the ADHD diagnosis with a grain of salt.
However, I have HUGE problems with the way our education system/schools treat our boys. I have worked in preschools and am currently opening my own and through my experience boys are just different. They are much more active and behave in ways that shouldn't be considered out of control. It's how the whole socialization process works and the style in which boys learn and relate to others is far more active and physical than with girls.
I hope you figure something out. MY son sounds exactly like yours, only it was at 4 yrs of age. He wasn't around kids much until preschool and once he did he blossomed into an active, vibrant, sometimes a little hard to get a handle on boy. But he had nothing wrong with him, he just needed a teacher who knew how to control the classroom. And when he got that this year in kindergarten he has flourished and is learning and achieving far above his age group.

N.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.K.

answers from Syracuse on

This is a tough one. Let me start out by saying that I am truly sorry you are going through this.

Now, you really need to take a good hard look at you son, and even though it is hard, you have to try not to be biased. Do you think there is any chance he may really have ADD? If you do, then getting him tested and the right help would be the right decision. If you think he seriously does not have it, I would try not to get him tested for a while, this test will label him trhoughout his school life and who needs that if it is not necessary.

Have you talked to your pediatrician? maybe she can observe him and help you decide or put you in contact with other people who can help you make the decision. Do lots and lots of research on the signs for this.

I personally know two little girls who are both ADD and there are significant differences in them both, my personal opinion is that one of them have it and the other one does not, so I belive they are quick to apply this label to children these days.

Good Luck with this, I know you will make the right dcision, mothers know what is truly best for their children.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.L.

answers from Buffalo on

Hi D.,

My son had some of the same problems when he was about that age too. The teachers kept telling me that it was a discipline problem, but I knew better. I finally figured out that he was allergic to Sugar, Red Food Dye and Wheat. When I transitioned these foods out of his diet, he became a different kid, able to focus and much calmer. Try watching his diet, that just may be the problem, especially if he has a lot of sugar in his diet or food dyes. If he eats a lot of cereal, try rice cereals instead like rice krispies or rice chex mix, etc. Be careful to read the contents on all foods for Red food dye, and try and limit the intake of sugar in his diet, substitute with natural sugars. Let me know if you try this and hopefully it works. Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.R.

answers from Utica on

Hey D.! IMO I would definitely get him him tested. It is better to catch this stuff earlier rather than later. If he get the extra help he needs from an early age I think it would be better than waiting, and at a certain age you would have to pay for it yourself, rather than now it would be up to teh SD to pay for it. I think the cut off age is 8 in NY. My friend is going through this same thing, although now he is 5 and in Kindergarten and having problems in school, they are probably going to have to hold him back a year because she has delayed in getting him tested for anything. The reason I say to get him tested is it could be a variety of other things other than ADHD. I know I would want to know early so I could give my son as much help as possible and a better advantage to starting his school years. I hope this helps! Take care!

D.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.G.

answers from New York on

I had my son evaluated at age 3 due to speech delays - he ended up qualifying for our districts special ed pre-k program ( with the diagnosis of developmentally delayed). He had a super teacher - he's now in the district's public prek inclusive program and doing great.

I would get an evaulation - he may just need some short term assistance and not be labelled for life.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.D.

answers from New York on

Check out Feingold Diet and read Dr. Doris Rapp's Is this your child?"--JMHO, but ADD is a result of allergies. My son's immune system was wrecked by vaccines and as a result he's allergic to gluten/casein/corn/soy and needs to be on a low yeast and low phenol diet.

He also has allergies to chemicals and seasonal allergies. We've found what works best is home schooling.

Also check for metal toxicity, this too can cause ADD symptoms.

Good luck,

A., mom to vaccine injured child

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.F.

answers from New York on

As an educator, I'd not suggest this until much later in the child's life, maybe during school years. It's too simple of an answer sometimes and not always a positive thing to label a child this early on. Perhaps see a behaviorist or therapist?

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

Y.M.

answers from New York on

Hi D.,
I am a social worker that works with families and their children. I have a masters in Social Work and have experience working with seriously emotionally disturbed children. I agree with you that 3 1/2 is a little to young to be tested for ADD. One of the requirements for the diagnosis of ADHD or ADD is a marked lack of focus and attention in schoolwork and an inabililty to concentrate in school and at home. Since he does not attend regular school yet, I tend to believe that his not listening and overactivity may be due to other factors. Has he experienced a anything bothersome lately? If he has, you may pinpoint what the problem is and take steps to help him through things. This may be as small as wanting more time with his mom as a way of getting attention from you. Also, he needs to learn how to interact with other children which is very new to him since he didn't have much opportunity to do this. This will take time and patience. My best suggestion is to go with your gut instinct on what is best for your son. You will know what is best for him. If I can be of more help, please don't hesitate to contact me. I have my own business working with families. My cell # is ###-###-####

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.S.

answers from Syracuse on

I think people are too quick to diagnose, put a lable, get the meds. You made some valid points, he is not used to being around a lot of other kids at once, he is only 3, and you are a single mom, which means it's usually just the 2 of you. I would make some changes at home. Check his diet. Maybe he just can't handle sugar. Also, since it is just the two of you he is used to your undivieded attention, so of course when he goes to school he expects the same. Try letting him have some alone time at home. Give him crafts that he can do on his own and let him do it. When he asks for help, be too busy, he'll eventually learn to deal on his own. Rule number one as a parent, follow yur instincts. Yours are saying don't test - so don't.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.M.

answers from Syracuse on

He's too young to be tested. Most doctors won't even test until a child is in first grade. Your son is probably just very very active. Don't worry about it. A lot of people are too quick to have children tested, and put on medication. I'm sure your son is just fine. You mentioned you were misdiagnosed with ADD as a child, but you didn't say what condition you have that led to your testing. You may want to have your child evaluated for whatever that is you have. You're right though, you don't want him stuck with an IEP his entire life for no reason. Tell people to suck it up, he's your child, and you know what's best!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.D.

answers from New York on

dear D.,

one thing to remember- preschool teacher see kids everyday and have a better idea of what is in the spectrum of "normal" I understand your concerns- labels to tend to stick with kids- but I think less so today than in the past. My husband is severly dyslexic and he has never told his current employer- he is afraid. but- if preschool teachers say there might be an issue- than I would listen- It might not be add- there are many other things that show up similarly- such as sensory integration issue- I just read an amazing book about the subject called "the out-of-sync child" by Carol Stock Kranowitz. She mentions the add and other possibilities. I read the book and it helped learn a lot about kids and various issues. What about paying to have him privatly evaluated so that you could get answer with out the school system knowing. I would contact an occupational therapist locally, express your concerns and see what they recommend. But- please look into it for both you and your son's sake.

a mom and preschool teacher.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.A.

answers from Portland on

I'd be careful about testing. It's much easier to blame a child than to capture a child's attention.

http://stepoutofthesilence.org/blogs/features/default.aspx

ADHD medicines can stunt a child's growth. Some of the symptoms of ADHD can be helped with diet or by reducing a child's exposure to TV. Dr. Perlmuetter, a neurologist I know who has been on Oprah and the Today show, has a great vitamin (Kids Brain Sustain) that can help. His website, books & blogs might be interesting to you. Good luck and listen to your inner voice over those other voices and outside "helpful" opinions.

http://renegadeneurologist.com/adhd-drug-does-stunt-growth/

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.C.

answers from New York on

D.,

Hi! My name is A. and I have a 2.5 year old son. I've also worked with kids in one way or the other all of my life. YOU are his mother, not the school, not the teachers. I've worked with ADD/ ADHD kids and your son doesn't fit the profile from the way you describe it: He's being a LITTLE BOY.

There's an author by the name of Micheal GURIAN. I highly, highly recommend you read his books before taking your son in for testing. He's an expert on boys. Reading his books has been a godsend for me. He talks about how boys' brains are structured differently, the chemistry is different, and how this relates to their world.

I would also hold off on having him "labeled." I did substitute teaching work for 5 years and many times couldn't tell who was "special needs" and who wasn't. The teachers would leave a list a mile long: this one has this, etc. I think it's a travesty the way the education system pushes for a quick fix. That's why I'm planning on holding off on preschool for my son until he's a little older.

Go with your heart and your maternal instinct. If you don't feel it's right, then don't do it. Maybe this sin't the right setting for him at this point. Just by asking you know you disagree with the premise.

Good luck!

A.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.D.

answers from New York on

My son has ADD of the inattentive type. He was tested when he was in first grade and was found to have various learning issues ... the neuro psych thought he might have ADD at the time but didn't diagnose him with it at that time because she thought some of his other language processing issues might make it look like he has ADD when it was really something else. It wasn't until he was at a special ed school (for bright highly functioning kids) that his inability to focus became clear. He is on a very low dose of a focus drug and it really helps him with academics. He is a joyous child who loves school and loves math and reading! I have always believed that information is really helpful, the more the better. My own philosophy about kids is that you want them to feel successful in school so that they have good self esteem and they love to learn. He probably could have made it in a mainstream school but at a cost to his self esteem and his interest in learning. I don't think there's as much stigma these days but if there is I don't really care. Kids at his school go on to become very successful adults.

I don't know if you can really distinguish ADD in a 3-1/2 year old. I rather doubt it. But a good neuro psychologist can tell you that. Get a good referral and go talk to one about all of this. Find a school that's supportive of children who aren't the cookie-cutter kids. When my son started pre school at the same age as yours, I was advised to get him tested. I held off, because like you, I thought it was kind of crazy at that age. But he had a teacher who was wonderful with children who had issues. My son didn't have behavioral issues, however, and if yours has more than the average kid, you will do him a big favor to find a school that knows how to deal with that. Kids who have behavioral issues who aren't in a supportive environment that knows how to modify behavior end up being demonized as bad kids. You don't want that to happen to your son. All kids are good kids. I wish you all the best in the world. Always remember that you know him best. Don't worry about societal stigma. Do what you know in your heart will be best for him. Protect his self-esteem like the mama bear protects her cub. Everything else will fall into place.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.A.

answers from Syracuse on

You cannont diagnose a child with ADD till atleast 7.. any doctor willing to do so before that should have one HECK of an extreme case.. or be willing to admit they got their liscence fraudulently.

If you are worried have him tested through the school for learning diabiliities or delays that may account for troubled communications, your doctor for food allergies (which is what most ADD really is anyhow) and get him involve din more physical stuff for his age and see if one or more things cna't help work out all that energy.

I wouldn't trust the co-op.. sometimes teachers are just as quick to want to label a child, instead of finding the underlying causes. They have several students and want quick fixes.. nto all but some do this... hey.. some kindergarten teachers sue their students for hugs goodbye.. it's a sick time we live in....

I would say if you really are worried see your ped and ask abotu food allergy testing.. again most ADD really is a misdiagnosis for corn and corn product or red dye 40 allergies... and it's sad to see parents jumping to drugs when they could just stop using packaged foods and not alert their children's chemical balance.

Good luck! Just my 2 cents.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.K.

answers from Rochester on

I don't believe in ADD at all. The medicine these kids are put on does more harm than good. Boys are suppose to be hyper and very active. It's up to us to teach them to control it and channel it into something positive. I have two boys, so I know they can be very active and sometimes they can have selective hearing as well :) It sounds like you are a great mother as well as very much concerned about your son.

I notice alot of doctors just diagnose kids with this and just put them on meds, the side affects of these will keep them up at night and make them moody as well.

In the end it is up to you, but you already have a good head on your shoulders about it!!!

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions

Related Searches