Getting My 15 Month Old to Sleep

You said "he was waking up 4-6 times a night on a good night and 10+ on a bad night for months on end." That sounds just like how my son was. He was waking almost every 15 or 20 minutes some nights. We had to rock him to sleep every night and every time he woke up in the night too. I also breastfed him when he woke most times (which turned out to not be the right answer either). He was also diagnosed and medicated for reflux. But the cause of my son's constant waking turned out to be lactose intolerance. Does you son scream or cry in pain whenever you lay him down flat, especially after he's just eaten? If he does, look into Lactose Intolerance. Steve Carper is a great source of info on that:

Steve Carper's website:

http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/stevecarper/guid...

and

http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/stevecarper/perc...

Even though you've had a few responses, here's some more to try:

An hour before his bedtime, dim down all the lights in your home to naturally increase his melatonin levels. Also, give him a warm bath in epsom salts. These measures will help get his body ready for sleep. Read quietly to him in a soft, meditative sort of voice, allowing him to get drowsy. Stories about lovely soft beds and wonderful dreams are great. Once he is placed in bed, it's OK to just rub his back once or twice, but do not start new long routines that will not work in the years to come.

I would stretch out the time between "checking on him." Instead of every 5 minutes, go 6, 7, 8... keep going. Better still, if you have a way to monitor him without physically going in the room, you can help this to pass sooner, as checking on him may be restarting the clock. For yourself, start timing how long he cries and write it down. You should see the length of time begin to drop when he is not getting attention for it. (Sometimes they will initially cry harder/longer, but that should pass quickly, followed by a drop).

Be alert for signs that something else is up. If you have tried these things for a good while and it does not seem to be working, set up your camcorder to record him sleeping and then watch it. You are looking for any behaviors that your doctor may need to know about. For example, muscle twitching or excessive kicking in the sleep, etc. It is possible that your child may end up having a sleep disorder, but it doesn't make sense to look that route until you have finished with the behavioral issues.

I agree with the previous poster that there is nothing wrong with a baby not sleeping through the night at 15 months and thank goodness he was rocked and snuggled to sleep with all his medical issues. That isn't "babying" him, its good parenting.

But you also need good sleep and it makes sense to start working on getting him to sleep longer stretchs now that some of his medical issues have resolved. First and foremost, realize that it will be a process and it won't happen overnight. Be committed to the process and recognize that you need to help your son learn good sleep habits - he shouldn't be expected to teach himself.

Start by establishing a consistent and relatively early bedtime. Then decide on a bedtime routine and follow it to the letter every night at the same time (bath, lotion, pjs, stories, kisses/rocking, etc.) For the first week or so, just implement the routine and still rock/walk/whatever him to sleep - he is getting used to the idea that there IS a routine and is learning sleep cues.

The next week or so, follow the routine and rock/walk him until he is very drowsy. Then put him in his bed quietly. Walk out of the room or around the corner or whatever. Give him a minute or two to settle. If he is fussing but winding down, wait and listen. If he immediately pops up and starts screaming, go back in, pick him up again and soothe him (but do not talk to him - keep your eyes closed, the lights off - everything very quiet and not stimulating). Hold him until he calms down and then put him down again.

At 15 months, I think you need to have a hybrid approach. There will likely be some crying/fussing because he is learning a new skill and he'd prefer you put him to sleep the way you always have. But you'd prefer some sleep sometime soon and that is also valid. I would urge you not to let him CIO, though. If you let himi cry, he will probably give up at some point because he realizes it is pointless, but I think its better to communicate to your child that he can rely on you and you will come when he needs you. You can be reassuring and loving while still teaching him to learn new habits.

If he takes a pacifier or any other comfort object, be sure to incorporate that into the bedtime/middle of the night wakings so that he slowly comes to associate that with comfort.

Take it slow. Take naps whenever you can (if you can) so that you are less frustrated and exhausted with the teaching process. This will not last forever, I promise. Hear your baby's cries as an effort to communicate with you and a desire to be close to you (good things!) - not being spoiled or manipulative.

Good luck!

B.
Momma to two sweet children

I would try the chiropractor. Whenever our kids (4 and 2) start to have rough nights (ever since newborn on) we would take them in to get adjusted and they would start sleeping better again..... I don't know why it worked but it did! Worth a shot for your son. Good luck.

Sounds EXACTLY like my son. He is 16 months now and there have been only a handful of nights that he actually slept through.
I have been trying to make sure my son eats dinner earlier and that the food is pretty plain so it doesn't make his reflux worse...Tried crying it out, but that still hasn't worked because his "crying it out" lasts over an hour.
The only things that have helped are playing and running around and running some more until he is completely worn out- that usually makes it much easier to put him down the first time and he sleeps for a few hours straight that way. I also have white noise playing constantly along with classical music.
Even with those things, we are still struggling. I try to tell myself "this wont last forever, at some point he is going to sleep" and also remind myself that it is not my son's fault.
I look forward to hearing the other responses too! Hang in there.

Let me say first of all that there is nothing wrong with a 15 month who doesn't sleep through the night. It is very normal and some babies/toddlers just take longer. Also every personality is different and some just need more help from you. Instead of making him CIO rock him to sleep in your bed and let him sleep there. I would bet that he stays asleep all night being close to you. Try not to worry about the number of times he wakes or how old he is, just be there for your son! Society puts way to much pressure on babies/toddlers and most of them are unrealistic expectations to what they are developmentally ready for. That is why the only real advice is to just leave them to cry themselves to sleep! Terrible advice in my opinion. Just trust your instincts and be there for your son. Co-sleeping sounds like the perfect solution. Good luck!

-E.