Feel Harrassed at Work

She's not your direct boss. Therefore, you have no responsiblity to her.
If she asks you to change something, make it clear that you need to discuss that process with your direct supervisor, first.

Then make sure your supervisor is aware of the changes/critiques she has of you.

If they are genuine - meaning you need to improve - your own supervisor has the resonsibility to train you on that.

She sounds like an office bully. The only way you take those people down a peg is by not responding to them. Refuse to make any changes to what you do until your supervisor is notified. Best friends or not, it's still your bosses job to clarify this and either take action to "correct" you where necessary, or to tell you to ignore the other woman.

Have you discussed this with your current supervisor? I certainly would and ask advice on how to deal with this woman. Also, do not change any wording and find out what the legal parameters are. Do you have an HR dept. where you work? Start with your current boss and make sure you have a list and are organzied in regards to spelling out what this woman has said and done and go from there.

I have a similar experience with a guy at work. I tried being nice, being bitchy, I tried not even speaking to him! he is not my boss but I do have to work directly with him on just about everything.

Until I started asking tons of questions. I had to show him that 1) I wanted to learn and make his life easier 2) that I'm not some idiot you can be a jerk to.

I then said "look I'm just doing this with the information I was provided, if have any insight on how I can do this better I'm willing to listen. Please remember I'm still new at this and would appreciate your help"...some people just need a ego boost...sometimes they feel defensive themselves and they use their "authority" to get it.

If it doesn't stop after trying what others below have said then I would go to HR...

In a work setting, you really need to be able to separate opinion from fact.
Deal with the facts, not opinions or feelings.
Also, you really don't need to listen to opinions of others. This is YOUR job, YOUR career. Don't get sucked into the "mob" mentality!
You are there to do a job to the best of your ability, right? And, no, no O. is perfect 100% of the time.
Ask for clarification, ask her to repeat or ask for additional information if there is something she's doing over and over again.....

As for the rumor mill--forget about it. Don't participate in it. No place for that in a professional setting. Talking about her (even if people are "letting you know they don't care for her") is unprofessional and will reflect badly on you and your abilities.

Good luck!

Gosh, what a miserable experience for you. Nothing sucks worse than working with someone who's made it their personal mission to torment you. It's a full on nightmare.

I learn this the hard way. Document, document document. Document what you did and when. Document that she is asking you to change notes and definitely ask if that allowed or legal as you don't want to be breaking company policy or laws. Write down word for word how she asked you to do it along with the time and the date.

This serves two purposes. The first is covering your butt when it comes to a he said, she said. The fact that you documented will add to your veracity. The second is to show a pattern of abusive and unprofessional behavior. People are a lot more likely to listen if they have proof in front of them with incidents times and dates, instead of having someone in front of them saying, "This one time....."

Right now it sounds like you will take anything she says wrong. Sorry. But when one feels "nit picked" anything someone says - even Hello or good morning can SOUND snotty to another.

Take a step back and LISTEN to what she is saying. Stop taking offense to it and LISTEN. Is she making constructive criticism or is she really picking on you?

Instead of fighting her. ASK her questions. It's OKAY to ask questions. Ask her WHY she wants you to make those changes. It's OKAY to state to her - please use a better tone with me. Or even what you said in your post - you ARE a professional adult and DESERVE to be spoken to better.

We will work much better together if you respect me and vice versa. She may not like that. But it's true. No respect means no fun. If things don't change. Document her behavior. Record her conversations so that someone else can hear how she speaks to you. Then go to HR telling them you have tried to work out any differences but you need help from them.
GOOD LUCK!!

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I know from experience that when you document everything it helps in the long run! Even if you don't do anything now, be sure to document everything that happens, witnesses, whatever. Know your rights, look in your employee handbook, see what you can do!

Since you are the 'newbie', you are the fresh meat. This means that she WILL nitpick every little thing. She is TRYING to break you. Some people just love belittling people. I have a neighbor like that. No matter WHAT the issue or topic, she always finds a way try and make herself look better.

You are a nurse. That alone means you have a strong backbone. You have survived a hospital setting with all of its unknowns for how long? Treat her like an unruly patient, with an abundance of nods, smiles and 'Thanks for pointing that out.'.

Know that she will find something wrong with everything. Let her have her moment, and then move on. Sometimes its not about defending yourself and your work, its about letting the other person have their 'power' moment.

If there is an HR department, you need to contact them ASAP. You need to make them aware of the situation. Next time she is talking to you in that manner, I would say "excuse me, I don't appreciate the tone in which you are speaking. We are all professional and I would appreciate being spoken to in that manner." I would say this very nicely. She sounds like a bully in the work place. There are people in the work place that like to flex their power. When she asks you to change your wording, I would say "I'm not comfortable with that" and ask her why it is necessary. Start questioning her questioning you.

I would also start looking for a new job. She might be trying to build a "file" on you. Good luck.

I would sit down with my supervisor and ask her advice. Say someting like:

"Mary keeps pointing out that I am not writing the right phrases in my patient documentation, can you help me get this right. I want to make sure I do it the best way possible?"

"Mary often asks me about the patient care and I need you to tell me what I may be doing incorrectly, I don't want to do something that will cost the company money?".

This way it is a "Can you show me the right way to do this" instead of "She's mean to me, make her stop" kind of way.

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My friend worked as a therapist in a clinic for several years. The billing clerk did some paperwork wrong, billed for incorrect services, got paid, etc...then it was caught by medicaid. They all lost their licenses to practice, they cannot work in ANY business that receives ANY government funding, not even a doc's office due to insurance. She was found to be innocent at the trial and can re-apply to get her license reinstated now that she is totally cleared but must, out of her own pocket, pay back every penny she received that was improperly billed. Until that money is paid back she cannot even work in a child care setting that gets subsidized payments from the state. She cannot find a job anywhere.

She even got fired from Walmart over this since the state has charge accounts with them.

They tell her as soon as she has paid back the thousands and thousands of dollars she owes them she can refile the bills with the right documentation and get paid the right amounts under the right codes.

SO, if you are incorrectly documenting, even the wrong word on occasion, it could come back to bite you in the butt and everyone else in the company too. It is the biggest deal in billing that can happen.

When you are a new hire it is difficult to know who you can trust. I would take a chance and ask the Assistant supervisor who has made comments on the nitpicker to meet you for coffee or lunch. I would only have this conversation away from the office. I would then see if she will talk more openly about this person, if so ask her to go to a meeting with your supervisor and the two of you can explain how she talks to you. Often if only one person talks to a supervisor that person is looked upon as a whiney malcontent but if two or more will go at the same time and explain what is happening something will get done.
Explain that you love your job and the challenge to learn new things ect but you can not stay if the situation doesn't change. If many of you say the same things; hopefull the company will see that she is the issue not the employees under her. Hopefully they will see that correcting her behavior is the answer. If not explain to your supervisor that talking to one person and fixing the problem is a lot more cost effective then constantly having to hire and train new people all the time.

Believe me I understand where you are coming from. I worked in a furniture store a few years ago. I sold a couch to a customer and the delivery guys couldn't get it in the house. They tried to get it in and ended up breaking a window on her storm door. The sales manager came to me and yelled at me that I should have known better than to sell that couch to that customer. It was all my fault and now the company had to pay to fix the window and do a free delivery. Some managers are good numbers people but need a lot of training to manage people.