Establishing Sleep Routine

Updated on March 17, 2009
R.S. asks from Decatur, GA
19 answers

My daughter is two and half months old, and a healthy 10 pounds 5 ounces. I've been trying to eliminate the night feeding (usually at 3am) so that I can get 6-7 hours of sleep at night, to be able to focus on my work during the day. I've read different suggestions and opinions, but I'm interested whether any of you have found a successful method for that. I tried to give her water, but she screams and pushes the bottle away, and calms down only after I give her the breast. She sleeps for about 5 hours after the night feeding at around 9-10pm. Then she wakes up at 3am, and then at 6 am. I am breastfeeding and supplementing with formula (mostly during the day) when my milk supply is not enough, so she is used to the bottle. During the longer stretches at night I have enough milk to breastfeed only. Thank you for sharing your experience.

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L.H.

answers from Atlanta on

You will get a lot of different advice from the moms as people have very different and very strong views on this topic. I agree with the moms that said she is doing well for her age but I do not agree with people who say babies don't sleep through the night until past six months or that you should just do whatever the baby needs and not worry about yourself. I would give it another month before you do anything (my son dropped that feeding at 3 months naturally so your daughter may do that) and see if she drops it on her own. Once she is 12-14 weeks, ask her doctor if she is old enough to "cry it out." If he/she says yes and you are comfortable with it, try letting her cry a few nights and see if she'll go back to sleep. Most parents only need to do this about 3-4 nights before the child drops the feeding. But 10 weeks is too early to expect her to go through the night. I think 12-14 weeks is the earliest you can expect this and I would not give cereal before 4 months.

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A.T.

answers from Atlanta on

Oh, my goodness, please do not give your little one any water. It's not recommended until your baby starts on solids and usually after 6 months. Before that, there is a risk of water intoxication.

My 5-month old is breastfed and still wakes up every two hours during the night, and that's with only getting up if he starts crying hysterically. Sometimes, he can go 4 hours without feeding if he's especially tired. Other times, nothing can calm him until I put him on the breast. He did sleep 5-7 hours for a short time during his second month, but that stopped after turning 3 months old and hitting his growth spurt. That's just how it is with a breastfed baby, especially mine who is particularly big for his age.

I agree with an earlier response to switch off feedings with your husband, especially if you both work and your little takes the bottle. It's only fair. One of you can take the early half of the night, and the other can take the later half. That way, everyone gets some sleep.

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S.B.

answers from Albany on

One of my twins slept all night from 2 weeks on but his twin brother woke up like twice in a week, which he was only 3 lbs and 11ounces when he was born and still underweight at the age of 4. Anyways,

When he got where he just wanted to be hold and no milk thats when I started just letting him cry it out and it worked, it was very hard to let my baby cry but he had gain enough weight by the time I let him which was at 3 months cause he was your daughter's size then and he didnt want anything but to be held.

You might need to try to let her cry it out if u can stand the crying because she might only want to be near you and in your arms. The crying with me stopped after the 3rd night.

Good luck.

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N.S.

answers from Spartanburg on

R.,
My daughter is 4 months old and we had similar problems. I didn't want to jeopordize her weight gain and development at all by actually eliminating a feed. We played with the timing of her feedings a bit so that we can get 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep. She nurses at 9pm and is then fast asleep. I change her diaper with all the lights on around midnight. This is usually enough to wake her up; we nurse again and she is good to go until around 630am.

For what it's worth, she is already sleeping very well and going a really long stretch for a breastfed baby!! We nursed every two hours throuhg the night until my daughter was 3 months. I agree with the others, water is not recommended at all b/c it can alter a baby's electrolyte balance. Many may say to add rice cereal, but her digestive system is much too young for that. See if you can play with the timing of her feeds so that her long stretch corresponds with your sleep time. Hope this helps. -N.

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L.S.

answers from Atlanta on

My 4 month old is still up twice each night, but luckily, she eats and falls right back to sleep. We did eliminate a 5 AM feeding about a month ago when I realized she was not eating as much at that feeding--I still got up when I heard her but I did not pick her up, just gave her a pacifier. It worked, but only because I think she was ready. She still wakes up sometimes around 5 and I have to plug her. So I'm with you in the sleep-deprived, half-brain, work-overloaded boat! It will get better, but for now, I think you are doing well with what you are doing. Hang in there!

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M.B.

answers from Atlanta on

Do u go to bed after the 9 or 10 pm feed? I always did a dream feed right b4 i went to bed and my lo would usually make it until 4-5 am.

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E.W.

answers from Atlanta on

While I feel pretty sure that someone will tell you this--at 2 1/2 months, your daughter probably needs to eat after those 5 hours. Her stomach capacity is probably not large enough for the nutrition she needs for any longer than that. As a large baby, she probably requires more nutrition. Every baby is different, some need every 3 hours for quite a few months. It's not healthy to give an infant that young water. I'm a big proponent of breastmilk--it is so much better for your baby. But it if the schedule is killing you, rather than water, prepare a bottle for some nights, so your husband can feed her. I know you are tired. I did the same thing you are doing for two boys and it is exhausting. I took a lot of evening naps, while my husband watched them to catch up on sleep. I need a lot of sleep, too. At four months or so you can add in some rice cereal near bedtime, which will help her get through the night. Hold on . . .

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C.H.

answers from Savannah on

5 hours is a lot of time for 2 1/2 year old to sleep at night in one stretch. Sorry to give you bad news but neither of my 2 boys slept that long at night until they were at least 8 months. Keep up the breastfeeding...it is the best for your child.

You can always try pumping an extra time during the day time and have dad give your daughter that bottle for one of the night feedings. Didn't work for me to get my husband to try this, but it might for you!

Good luck!

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M.M.

answers from Columbus on

You are so very lucky to have her sleeping for 5 hours straight!!! My daughter got up every 2 hours on the dot for a feeding util she was 4 months old. I think at 2 and a half months, she is a little too young to expect her to sleep 6-7 hours at night. From my experience that would be a miracle!

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F.T.

answers from Athens on

Hi R., kudos to you for breastfeeding your daughter! I would not try to get her to sleep through the night until she is ready. Most babies will drop their night feedings on their own when they are ready to do so. It may take some time however. In the reading I've done, they say only about 50% of babies sleep through the night prior to their 1 year b-day. I had twins (who are now 19 months) and they didn't sleep all the way through the night until almost 11 months old (7:30 PM -7 AM). I breastfed them almost exclusively until 1 year and part time until 17 months. Yes, it was tiring at times, but about every 4 months, they would drop another night feeding naturally until they got to where they would sleep all the way through. I wouldn't worry about it, just try to get as much sleep as you can (go to sleep as soon as she does) and remember it will not last forever! Best of luck and keep up the breastfeeding!

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W.S.

answers from Columbia on

Just to reiterate, for her age sleeping through the night is defined by sleeping for 5 straight hours. I would choose my 5 hours. If you go to bed at 11, try giving her a sleepy feed at that time. Maybe she'll then sleep until 4. With my son, I go to bed when he goes to bed. If I don't I always give him a sleepy feed before I do, not that this actually works for him. He is almost 6mos old, exclusively breastfed and usually goes no longer than 3 to 4 hours MAX during the night. Typically he will still wake up every two hours for a snack. I would jump up and down, scream for joy and be the most well rested woman on the planet if he slept for five hours straight every night. Hopefully the advice that should've worked for me will work for you. I just have a midnight snacker, but seriously, it won't last forever he could decide to wean himself at any moment, so I truly don't mind all of the night feeds. Maybe she just enjoys that extra close time at the breast with you during the night. If you are going through the trouble of giving her water, isn't it easier to just pick her up, give her the nourishment from the breast for ten minutes and then go right back to sleep? This special time together will be gone before you know it and if she's already down to one feed at night it will probably only last another month or so... Unless of course you find yourself about to go absolutely crazy....then I can only tell you what my friends do which is give their babies rice cereal in the last bottle of the night. This is not my personal recommendation, but I understand that the better rested and the better frame of mind you are in the better mom you will make so pick your battles, only you know what's best for your situation. Hope this helps!

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M.A.

answers from Charleston on

Your daughter is probably close to giving up the middle of the night feeding on her own (yea!). Usually 3 months or so is when they start sleeping through the night. You may want to try to put off the 10pm feeding until 11pm, but water is not recommended for babies under at least 6 months, I think (check with her pediatrician). At 3 months, you could try letting her cry it out at 3am. I did this with both of my boys, and they only cried for a few minutes, for a couple of nights, before they fell back asleep, which assured me that they were not hungry, only waking out of habit. It may be a little early to hope for a 7 hour stretch of sleep for you both. Try taking an afternoon nap when she naps, or go to bed earlier and wake for her late night 10pm feeding to catch up on your sleep.
M.

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V.E.

answers from Atlanta on

When you start her on cereal and give it at this last night meal she will probably start sleeping all night. My best suggestion is to be ready for bed as soon as you get her down for the night. You must get enough sleep. Ask for help from hubby to get the evening chores done where you can go to bed when she does. V.

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T.D.

answers from Spartanburg on

Hi, I had to go back to work early too when my daughter was a baby. She would wake up at 3am also. My doctor said it would be ok if for her last feeding before bedtime I could mix a little baby cerial in with her bottle of formula and it would fill her up for the night. It worked for me. She then slept till around 6am which was the time I had to get up for work anyway.
Good Luck!

T.

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B.

answers from Augusta on

I'd have to agree expecting a 2.5 month old to get through the night w/o needing to eat, remember her little tummy is only as big as her fist. and you are very lucky to have her only eating once a night. Breastfeeding is a supply and demand process, the more she bfeeds the more milk you will make. trying to skip the night feeding just to get sleep will mess up your supply even more. Just feed her, her sleeping schedule will space out. The rush to get her to sleep though the night is unreasonable. And in reality she is already sleeping through the night 5 hrs or more at a time is through the night.
Pick this book up and use it when she gets older.

http://books.google.com/books?id=dkKi6t308iMC&printse...

Do things to up your milk supply like taking fenergeek ( can't remember exact spelling.) and up your water intake. You should be drinking a TON of water. Remember all that water you had to drink while pregnant , well drink at least that much.

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B.W.

answers from Myrtle Beach on

I'm afraid this isn't what you want to hear, but of my 4 kids only one would sleep 6-7 hours at a time for me at that age and it wasn't anything I did. I have always believed in feeding them when they were hungry. She just started sleeping. Had she woken up I would have fed her. But, all of mine were exclusively breastfed, perhaps your LO will do it for you as formula is harder to digest and therefore stays with them longer. But I would say most breastfed babies do not sleep that long at that age, regardless of size. My youngest, who is 14 months, was born almost 10 pounds. He ate every 2 hours until he was coming up on a year old. Nights and all. I think because of his size he needed more and he was very slow to get teeth so he couldn't eat as much "real food" as he wanted. Just this week he seems to have cut out the night feeding, we were still doing 1 or 2. But we've gone about 5 days without it now. All this to say, she sounds very normal, and personally, I would feed her. Of course, itis your choice and your baby! :)

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J.F.

answers from Washington DC on

This is so sad to me! First I HIGHLY suggest drinking a mothers milk tea and adding oats into everything you can think of to up your milk supply. Breastmilk is supply and demand if you cut out those night time feedings your 'demand' will be lower and you will produce even less milk. Also stop the formula and nurse more often even if its just comfort nursing it will still help your supply increase. the more formula you give her the less breastmilk you will have. 2.5 months is too young to be expecting her to sleep through the night. also please don't buy into those old wives tales of giving her food or water to get her to sleep longer they are MYTHS. her gut is still immature and the more things you introduce to it (like rice cereal or wheat or anyfood other than the food that was intended her in BREASTMILK) the greater the chance she will have for food allergies and other issues.

the best thing I ever learned was that i can nurse in my sleep because breastfeeding while sleeping is truely a lifesaver!

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S.P.

answers from Charleston on

All babies are different but a lot of breastfed babies don't sleep through the night for a while. Even if you're supplementing with formula she still craves that secure cozy feeling of nursing. Nursing her in the middle of the night is the best option. It will also help to keep up your supply along with pumping when you're away from her and can't nurse for more than about 4 hours. Taking a supplement called fenugreek, which you can find at GNC and other healthfood stores, will also help with supply but only in conjunction with regular nursing and/or pumping. Breastfeeding usually goes hand in hand with lack of sleep. She probably craves it more during the night seeing as she doesn't always get to during the day. It may seem like a lot to ask of yourself, but the lack of sleep will be worth it for at least the first year in exchange for the long term health and security of your little one.

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S.B.

answers from Atlanta on

I will just second a couple of things that have already been said... Until baby is around 6 months, they should be eating every 3 hours during the day and 5-6 hours at night. Sounds like she's right on task. My baby woke every 1-2 hours until he was about 8 months. Our solution was that he started sleeping in bed with us at about 4 months so that I could nurse him while sleeping. It was our saving grace. We started sleep training at 8-9 months to get him back to his crib and sleeping on his own through the night. He is doing very well now! Also, definitely try to go to sleep when the baby does- that will make a huge difference!

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