My daughter had 8 ear infections from the time she started daycare at 5 months old until she was 10 months old. We went to an ENT and he suggested tubes. As freaked out at my husband and I were about putting our baby under anestic for this procedure, we decided that this was the best option for her. At 11 months old we did the procedure. The tubes came out on their own about 18 months later. During that time she did not have any ear infections. She is now 7 and has only had 2 ear infections during that time in the last 6 years. In addition she just got less colds. It seemed like she came down with everything we came across but that reduced drastically once the tubes were in place. Everytime she got an ear infection it affected her sleep which affected everything from her health to her behavior. She was much happier and healthier after we did the tubes.
We did it early enough with her that her speech was just starting to develop so we did not have any issues there. But I do feel that it could have been a big obsticle for if we would have waited another year. The speech concern was the reason we decided to do the surgery at 11 months rather than waiting to see what happened the following season.
I'm convienced that it was the best choice we could have made and I would absolutely do it again.
One thing to keep in mind - you need to make sure to keep the water out of his ears while the tubes are in. We bought the "ear bandit" which is basically a waterproof head band. You put the ear plugs in then use the head band to make sure they do not fall out. It worked really well for us so you may want to look into that or something like it. I was not comfortuable just putting the ear plugs in without having something to make sure they stayed in turn bath time and other water play. We spent alot of times out on the lake during the summer and our daughter was also in swim lessons from 15 months on so even with the tubes in her ears... she could still have fun in the water.
Good luck with your decision. If the ENT feels it is the best option for your son then it probably is. Especially if his speeh is delayed. Don't beat yourself up about it. And the younger you do it the easier it will be for him to get better.
L.