Does Anyone Have Kids That Have Age Difference of 14-16 Yrs?

C.,

I am 12 and 13 years younger than my sisters. So, from my point is view, it was fine, I liked it. I did feel much like an only child, since my sisters moved out of the house when I was really young. And when they did live there, they were on their own a lot. It was nice, not too much sibling rivalry! Now there is since I've gotten older! haha I think it was great for my mother too, she wanted to have more, but it wasn't in her cards. Good luck, it'll be WONDERFUL!! Just remember what it was like to have a little baby again, it's the best thing in the world!

C.

I just had to share with you; I'm in the same boat as you,
I'm a single mom of a 12 year old boy, I've never been married, I love my son more than anything in this world, I love loving him and am so grateful for having him, I hate to think where I'd be if I didn’t have him. However being single and living on our own for the first 10 1/2 years (I hope this doesn’t sound like I regret my son in any way) Its been worth it, its just that it was so hard and I was so scared and sad for our future and so exhausted and overwhelmed as he grew and needed things like boy-scouts, baseball, help with homework, he has ADHD which has been a real challenge for us, the calls from school, being the only decision maker, the bread winner, the coach, the teacher, the cook, the maid, and then all the worries of "what if" he gets hurt or killed, what if he is an angry over-rebellious violent teen, gets hooked on drugs, gets a girl pregnant. I’ve had nobody to discuss things with, to cry to or with, to share responsibilities with, I haven’t ever even received any kind of child support so financially its been hard too.
So….Now I'm with this wonderful man who is 41 with no kids, he wants to have a family, and I’m terrified, I cant imagine it being anything other than what I’ve experienced, I’d do it all again for my son but don't know how to say yes to starting over with more, I feel like I’ve barely survived this one.

Ok so I've laid my load on you and your looking for answers, I have none other than I'm where your at, I took out my IUD in December, had a chemical pregnancy in February, and still scare shizless about getting KU.

I think the only thing that keeps me going is hearing what other woman have to say about it, (I'm looking forward to the response you get) Every single woman I've spoke with that has had similar situation as me say that I need to do it, and when I think about it, the only reason I've never had more or wanted more is because I have never been in a loving relationship with someone, I've never even considered having another child, I actually think I trained my self to think "I just don’t want more kids" because It hurts to bad to want something you cant have, so I quit wanting it, this is the first time in my life I've been with someone who isn’t going anywhere, is not going to abandon me, we're good financially, we have a home, with bedrooms, play rooms, a yard, so I'm safe to start dreaming of a family, I may be a bit older than most women having kids, but I was in no situation to be planning for more kids in my twenties. I feel like I'm old enough, mature enough, stable enough, we have a very strong family. So Maybe I'm ready, (lol, my therapist said I was ready too) every one sees it and suggests it, they have been for about a year now, so In December, after praying about it for a long time, I realized if I'm going to do it, the time really is now, and I have to share with you this, My husband is so sweet, amazing, loving, to everyone we meet, he is such a good person by nature, I love him so much, He loves my son so much, he spends such quality time with him all the time, and I know in my heart he will always love my son and never stop having an amazing relationship with him, they are always going and doing "Guy Stuff", I know he'd make a wonderful father,
And it hit me that he deserves to experience the most powerful love I believe there is, and that’s the love you have for your own children, he deserves to have his kids, and I'm honored to be the one to give him his children, and I have to remind my self that I deserve that too, to have this experience. It won't be like it was, I believe that, Just take it one day at a time, and enjoy every moment of each day, from planning to conception (if its gods will and what you decide to do) to delivery, to each sweet moment of those little lives (well that’s what I tell my self anyway)
Ok, so I've gone on more than I planned (sorry so long), but if you ever want to talk more, feel free to send me a personal message. It’s nice to know I'm not alone.
Good Luck.

Hi C., After reading your message I was surprized how many mothers were starting over!!!I also started over I have a beautiful 28 year old daughter from my first husband, and another beautiful 6 year old daughter with my second husband.I was so shocked with my little Victoria I didnt really get to think it through the fact was I was indeed having a baby at 42. It was very hard on me and my family. alot of issues got brought up the biggest one was my oldest was a only child for 22 years. She was happy and jealous both.We had issues to work out. I had two granddaughters 1and3 years old. Grandma is having a baby? then my career I have gone back to work a couple of times but having a young school aged girl takes alot of work too.I had to change my priorties in my life when I thought I had already done that. I guess the bottom line for me is Yes I still would of had her and yes it changed my life as a parent/grandma everything you can think of has changed, and yes I love where I am at today 48 stay at home mom.......

Hi C.,
I thought I'd share my own experience. I was a single Mom for 8 years raising 3 children. I was not necessarily "looking" for a man because I knew the Lord was going to send me the right man. Well, after being married for about a year we found out we were pregnant. I was a bit scared (I was older) and my youngest at the time was 12. My little "late in life blessing" has been the best thing for our family, and brings so much more joy and laughter! My older boys are now in college and my daughter is a high school cheerleader, so we are busy. My littlest guy keeps us grounded and focused on what's important, and has also even been instrumental in birth control talks :)
Plus I have all the babysitters I need. I have people ask all the time for advice, and telling me they wish they had the strength to do it all over again. I would not trade my life with anyone and love every minute. Good luck to you and your family, and know most of all that people do care :)
Peace, T.

Hi C.. I have a ten year age gap in my kids. I have a ten year old and a one year old. I've heard an adult with this age gap between her and her brother say that she thinks it made her realize how much work kids can be and it may have kept her from having sex as a teenager. My ten year old daughter loves our one year old son. She's a huge help but I'm careful not to put too much pressure on her to take care of him too often. Go for it! They'll love that baby and learn from it. Good luck!

I don't personally have kids that far apart, but I come from a big family (7 kids). I'm the youngest and my oldest sister is 20 years older than me. I really didn't spend a lot of time with my oldest sister, since she was in college before I was even born, but we're still close. I wouldn't worry about the age difference between your kids too much if that's what you're worried about.
Definitely make sure your new child has some younger kids to play with though, cousins, etc. (If you decide to have another that is.) It really sounds like your new hubby is pressuring you though, and I would make sure that YOU want a baby. It may be too soon after your miscarriage if you are having so many doubts about it. Think it through, but I wouldn't let the age difference influence you too much.

C.,

I am a sibling with that kind of age difference. My twin sister and I were born to my mom( age 38 at the time) and dad( age 55 at the time). My older sister was 15 and my brother was 19. Now you are considerably younger then what my mom was when she had us, and twins at that! It was hard being a child to such older parents but that was bc my mom was inactive with us. She didnt enjoy going out and playing with us and etc. But my older siblings made sure we did fun things. Its different having older siblings bc to me at least they act like parents! Not only do I have my parents( divrcd whn i was 2) but I also having my now 36 yr old sister and 41 yr old brother giving me "advice". So what I am saying is, it really isnt bad having the age difference bc its like being young all over again, I suppose!

Best of luck,

A.

I have a friend who had a 16-year-old and a 12-year-old and had a surprise pregnancy. She was terribly upset about it. She didn't want to start all over as she felt her life was great just the way it was. Her husband on the other hand, was elated by the idea of another baby and convinced her everything would be fine. It's now been a few years since her baby was born and she says it been the best thing she's ever had happen to her. She said being a parent the "second time around" has been more fulfilling since she was older, wiser and more financially able to provide for all her children. And her older children were willing and able to help out.

No one can make the decision for you, but at least you know there are others out there who thought it was a bad idea and it turned out to be wonderful!

My cousin had a baby at 36. She already had two girls ages 11 and 16 from her first marriage. She had re-married a few years back and she and her husband decided to try and have a child of their own. It has worked out great! The girls absolutely LOVE their little sister. In fact, the older one graduated early and attends school in the evening so that she can babysit her little sis during the day (not that your kids would like to do that.) Point is they are a great help with their new sibling and the baby is adored by her parents. Good Luck with whatever you decide!

I am a sibling of a rather large family (9) I am the second oldest. My youngest brother is 9. (18 year difference.) My Youngest sister is 15 again a large gag between us. i handled it fine. I actually have a great relationship with both of them. I am able to turn off being a mom and be a sister to both of them. My daughter who is 5 has a great relationship with my brother. I really like having such a large age difference. It might harder because you are use to independent children who are almost out of the house. That would have to be your personal choice whether or not you want to start over. You are still really young and I think if you are healthy, you are perfectly capable of having a healthy pregnancy. You might even be able to be more attentive with your children almost grown. More helping hands and built in sitters. Good luck in what ever you decide.
E.

I am 24 and my brother is 10. He was a "surprise" for my parents. We still are able to talk and have a relationship and he is thrilled to be the uncle to my 2 little girls. It does change the dynamics of the relationship because it is almost more like I am a well love aunt or something rather than a sister.

Also, I have a friend who's sister is 15 years older and they didn't have much of a relationship when they were younger, but now they are really close and I know my friend values her big sister's maturity and experience a great deal.
Hope this helps!