Do You Travel Internationally?

As with many things where someone won't agree with your parenting, simply say you viewed all the data, you made an informed choice with your child, and you gave her an opportunity that she was ready to handle. Next. It wasn't like you threw your kid in a boat and told her to row.

Also, people who are too afraid to leave the US (or their state/county/town) are not people you will ever convince that there's really cool stuff out there. Consider the source when they look at you weird.

My daughter lives in Seoul 10 months of the year (she teaches 2nd grade in an International School..... usually less than 5 students in her class each year!). When she was first planning on doing that, people would comment "How can you let her DO that?"

Our response.... "How can we NOT let her do that?" She is an adult, and very able to take care of herself... she has been there for 4 years now. Frankly, she is safer in Seoul than in many places in the United States, even with the "threat" (as some people see it) of North Korea.

Life isn't guaranteed..... we can't live in fear all our lives..... life is to be embraced, not feared....

You are indeed fortunate to have a job that allows you to experience so much of life!

A good response to those naysayers? "I'm sorry you feel that way..... I enjoy exploring new cultures!" (Frankly, they're just jealous... and their negativity is just their way to justify their feelings....)

I am from the UK, where we travel A LOT! When moved here I was truly amazed at the amount of people who had never left the country. My husband had never had a passport!
then I realized that America is so huge and diverse, maybe you just don't need to leave! I think you should ignore the jealous people, your daughter has a great experience, but again, maybe people in this country just don't feel the need to leave.

I can honestly say that I am jealous! To me that sounds completely amazing for you and your daughter!
I have had issues with people wanting to push their opinions onto me, just not about travel. I try really hard not to be snarky, but sometimes it's more difficult than others. Personally if someone makes an off comment to you or your daughter, you might say something like "I had a really good time, and it was interesting, and extremely educational for international affairs." Or, if you feel a bit more daring, you might say something about most of the nation descends from immigrants and wanting to see where everyone had come from.

My experience with people is when you use terms like " I try to absorb the culture" and the like it comes off pretentious and people tend to be negative. When I just answer the questions people ask it is always positive. So I guess I am saying less look at me and more of them asking questions may help you avoid negative.

No one likes the person that keeps going on about their travels, especially when they can't afford them or have other things they would rather spend their money on. I have never received anything but positive interest in any of my travels, local, national or international.

You are terrific!

I went on a two-month exchange to Japan when I was 17 and it was fantastic. (And I've been back since!) Your daughter gained so much from her experience and you were right to let her go -- you knew her maturity and limits and based your decision on that. If anyone hassles you that "she was too young" or questions it, just smile and say "She did fine and had a great experience. You can ask her if you don't believe me!" and change the subject.

Closed-minded people just won't get that some of us like to travel overseas. So don't even try to engage them or change their narrow minds. Tell your daughter the same. Say things that truly reflect your feelings but that also close the subject by turning a question on them:

"Well, I had a wonderful time and learned a lot and got to experience a new place which was good. Where are you going/where did you go for your vacation this year?" Then don't compare your experience with theirs -- just smile and tell them their holiday sounds like it was great.

I'm not sure why others feel they must judge or disrespect or comment on your travel -- it's not like you have a real choice, if it's for work! They should either be supportive or merely say, "Oh, that's nice" and move on. Sad that they don't. Enjoy your job and your travel.

I think I'd look back at them equally astonished. "You mean you've NEVER left the US? Wow... I can't imagine that in this day and age..." In terms of your daughter, kind of same idea. Not sure exactly what they're saying but I'd probably ask if they're NOT encouraging their kids to go overseas with the global economy and all... I'd just say "I'm so glad she's really open minded and adventurous. What's Johnny doing for the summer?" Likely it'll sound quite mundane in comparison. Same time - I'd ONLY do this when someone seems to be criticizing you and your choices. You don't want to start bragging. Doesn't seem like you do at all though.

My husband and I travel and live overseas often. I sometimes run into americans who also live overseas with me that never, never take advantage of where they are living and only go to and from work, shop on base and to the american school. They have no desire and drive me crazy. Why even bother living overseas if you don't want to be there to begin with? But I get what you are saying about negitivity. I mostly get disinterest. They ask how it was living in said country but are just being polite and have zero interest in hearing about our experience. For those I just say it was good and change the subject. I think a lot of people are scared to leave the security and comfort of the US. And that's fine for them. I'd rather meet new people and see new cultures. Yes sometimes it's hard to be in a third world country but it can be so amazing too. Good for you for taking the leap yourself and encouraging your daughter to do so as well.

I lived in Rio for 3 years with my family. My grandparents (mom's parents) were a little taken aback. One Aunt told my dad she was sorry he couldn't find a job in America! Ah, he worked for Union Carbide!!!

I have been to almost every country in South America. My daughter took her first "solo" international trip in June. She went to Germany. Hubby and I have taken the kids to the Dominican Republic and he and I have been to Paris and London.

I want to move overseas sooooo bad!! They are jealous and what you have given your daughter is so importantl I feel it is important to empower our daughters. They need to know they can stand on their own two feet! I hope she knows how lucky she is that she has parents that see the value of experiencing other cultures and to value her opportunities!

Well done Mom!!!!

I think people make negative comments because they're jealous. That's what I'd tell my daughter - pay no attention or just feel sorry for them because they are jealous and wish they can go. Since they can't, they want to rain on your parade. Misery loves company!

I'll never understand this mindset.
I have some relatives that live just an hour and a half's drive from San Francisco, a true world class travel destination and they NEVER go into the city. They say it's too crowded, dirty, the people are "weird" (okay that's a little bit true!) whatever. It's a matter of people not wanting or being able to step outside of their comfort zones.
But they are perfectly happy that way so go figure.
And good for you letting your daughter go to Japan, what an incredible experience for her! We also let our 15 year old daughter go on a teen travel trip last year to Greece and Italy, and we had a few people raising eyebrows too, especially in light of the unrest in Greece last summer. But we trusted the group she was with, and they even commented upon her return on what a great traveler she was. The kids who had never been away from mom and dad, and the ones with very little travel experience had a much harder time. Our girl was confident because she HAD been away from home before (be it only domestically) and she's been on airplanes her whole life.
So to the naysayers? Just smile and say, what can I say? We LOVE having adventures, and you can't do that sitting on the couch, can you :)

I tend to think that at least some of the people giving you negative responses are probably jealous that they don't have the same opportunities.

Someday I hope to be able to travel around the world. When I was 17 I was able to go on a pilgrimage to France, Spain & Portugal with a large group (including my aunt and cousin.) BEST 2 weeks of my life (no offense to my husband and kids).

I'd encourage your daughter to hold her head high, and just be assertive and to think about a few awesome things she encountered at each place, or foods she has tried to ATTEMPT to educate those whose objections are based on ignorance.

I used to, I loved it so much. I wish I could take my daughter and husband to the places that I love.

If you can go, then GO. Open your mind and eyes, the world is so vast and varied and so familiar at the same time.

Edit: My husband mentioned looking for jobs in England. I would go in a heartbeat, sell everything possible for the tickets and pack everyone up and go. We however would never hear the end of it from his family. They're the home body type. They have issue with us being in Indiana and not Mississippi.

Good for U!!!! I wish I had a job like that .....

You are lucky that you get to experience so much. And more importantly you are so open minded to other cultures! That is just awesome. People who make negative comments are usually close minded and are the ones that are not helping the kids in the is country that there is a beautiful different world out there!! Enjoy your time. You are going to pass on wonderful stories to another generation and will hopefully pass on the wanderlust and open mindedness to them. I find it sad that you have to hear these negative remarks. You keep on going!! Safe travels!!

"Isn't it funny how we can each have such different reactions to places? I guess that's what helps make the world go 'round!" T

Try a line similar to that. You most likely won't change their minds so it makes no sense to try -- and why should you or your daughter have to defend your choices to these people? I find the best thing to do is acknowledge their comment and move on.

Personally, I love to travel and, like you, was very fortunate that my old job required some pretty interesting trips to some fascinating destinations. I tried to never engage in a debate about where I was going since, really, I had no choice! Still, like you, I find travel pretty much anywhere broadens the mind and your horizons. When I went places I really didn't want to go I found an open mind on my part made the trip much more pleasant -- and I usually wound up with an experience or two that changed my mind.

We've been pretty fortunate as a family to have some travel opportunities and I think my kids are more accepting of others and more adventurous because of them. I recently made my 20yo renew her passport. She doesn't have any immediate travel plans but I figure it never hurts to be prepared!

Keep opening doors for yourself and encourage your daughter to do the same. The wonderful experiences that come with travel -- the food, the people, the landscape, the culture, all of it! -- will keep us all going and growing. Bon voyage!

I love traveling -- here in America or abroad. We're getting ready to book another trip to Central America in another month or two. My parents are fuddy duddies. So is my brother, actually. No international travel for them. 'Why would we ever want to leave the U.S.?' they say. They have friends that take cruises/vacations all over the world and they just don't understand it! Personally, I find that people who travel internationally are more open-minded and have broader perspectives on life, in general. Frankly, I'm attracted to such people! I love expanding my mind with rich experiences of other cultures. Travel on, fellow traveler!