Depressed or Obsessed?

My son is the same age and I completely understand what you're going through. I hate the fact that the little baby I brought home with me from the hospital needs me less and less, but it becomes a different kind of need. He can scale around my living room no problem, but if he falls and bumps something nothing helps except mommy's love. Remember that. No matter how big they get...they still their mommy.

S.
This is normal at least I hope because I went through the same thing with my daughter. I just chose to not let it bother, because I knew my daughter was going to pick up those vibes. I chose instead to spend as much time as possible with my little girl. If I felt the need to cry I'd do it after she went to bed and talking to my hubby about it helped a lot. I hope this helps.

Of course it's sad to see how fast they grow. I cried when my son outgrew newborn size diapers. Just remember, it's his job to grow and learn. He's supposed to pull away from you a little more each day. That's how you know you are doing YOUR job well. It's our jobs as moms to raise these children into great adults. Becuase adults is what they will be to have children of their own.

I think it's normal to have thoughts like that occasionally. It's sad, whatever age that baby is, he'll never be that age again. And though in two months you'll 'gain' a year old baby, you'll have essentially 'lost' a younger infant. I have 5 kids now, my oldest is 20. Though I adore and admire the young lady she now is, I can't even listen to "under the sea" from little mermaid without crying! It reminds me of that beautiful little girl I used to enjoy so much! And she's gone, just in my memory and a bunch of pictures. She's been replaced with this young woman who I also adore... don't get me wrong... but Crissy as a young lady, that was the TIme of my Life, and sure, you miss it, you'll get sentimental about it. 20 years old and I'm still sad about the loss of my baby! I think so long as it doesn't interfere with your normal everyday function ablility, it's natural for a mother to miss her baby as he/she grows up. I know I sure do! I miss all my kids, but honestly, especially THAT one, my firstborn, my little angel. Her little voice, her little expressions and way she'd sing little songs to me, we'd play under "tents" we made out of sheets over furniture... and with her, those days are long gone. You'll absolutely miss it, and not just now, but forever, you'll go thru moments where you get all sentimental and weepy, missing a younger age of your baby. Like you, I wish you could put a pause button on them and just soak them up at any age for a bit longer!

For the first year post pregnancy all of our bodies are hormonially out of wack. I had post-partium depression. I got to the point where I thought no one could take care of my son like I could. I got really upset when someone else held him or fed him or made him stop crying. I couldn't leave to go to work without crying.
We all cry as our babies grow up especially as they become toddlers and start moving on their own. If your worried about whether or not you're having a harder time than most mom's letting go talk to someone. It can't hurt and it will put your mind at ease. I waited and I wish now that I hadn't I felt so much better after talking to someone. Good luck and please let us know how you are doing.
Allie

Try not to let yourself get caught up in in how fast time is flying by, because before you know it you will be looking back trying to figure out why you spent so much time wrapped up in how fast he grew, instead of spending quality time and making great memories. If you dont hane a good quality camera get one!

Just enjoy every minute of every day and make lots of memories with your baby, S.. Read to him every single day, give him lots of hugs, kisses, I love yous and just inhale his sweet aroma. Take lots of photos, have lots of 'adventures' with him (even just in the back yard!) and enjoy each age as they arrive. My baby boys are 19 & 17 years old now and I still cry each time I have to say good-bye to my older son who is off at college, after a visit home. I miss him so much and lots of times, he is in my dreams at night, but as a three year old! In those dreams, he sounds & acts exactly as he did at that age! They have been such fun dreams and I think I have them because I miss him so much and because my baby boys' earlier years were my most favorite time of my whole life! Some times I'll even throw in the Winnie-The-Pooh DVD and have it playing while I'm cleaning my kitchen, because it makes me smile and remember those wonderful baby days. I still have my younger son home, but he has a girlfriend now and is in love & all of that, so I've sort of had to let go of him too! I do adore his girlfriend and love the person she has helped to blossom into the wonderful young man that he is. Anyway, my husband & I deal with the 'separation' by recalling and laughing over the things that happened when ours sons were little boys. Those babies God sends us are such a blessing. Enjoy! Love, D. N. xo

I can truly empathize with you. like you, I have had dealings with depression and it can pop up when you least expect it. I think it is normal..whatever normal is. It's hard to watch someone we love make leaps that we know will take them away eventually. My advice is to find a therapist if you do not have one already and talk about these feelings. Joining a MOMS group may also help you see that you are not alone.

I think that its normal but it does sound like you might still be a bit depressed....Depression can manifest itself in many ways. Take care of yourself.

Jenn Smith
http://jennsmith.stayinhomeandlovinit.com

S.,

Of course you are normal! You are describing what every parent epxeriences ... some more strongly than others. Having a baby is a major life change, and it can take up to a year before your harmones are normal again. The harmone changes are bigger than any PMS you've ever had. Post Partum depression can begin up to one year after birth. You should seek out a professional to talk to. A psychologist or counselor can help you see your situation from a different light and give you the guidance you need to address your post partum problems as well as your feelings about your baby growing up. I wish you all the best success. Remember, feeling this way is temporary. You can, and will,get better with the right help.

F.

S.,
i am a mother of two and i feel the same with my children i think it is normal, My daughter will be two already next month and my son will be one in March. I think that we see them doing everything on their own, and were use to doing everything for them and it bothers us but i think it's Normal. and ur not obsessed. :)

Hi S.
I think its totally normal. I can also relate...I STILL get sad and mine are 16,14 and 10. But, I constantly remind myself that each phase they go thru is an exciting time and I need to stop worrying about it or I will miss whatever is happening at the moment. Time does go by so fast,so enjoy every minute and takes lots of pictures and video...its so fun to look back!

S.,

You are not "obsessed." Almost everyone has similar feelings as they watch their children grow. If you are having such "overwhelming feelings" of sadness, you need support. Speak to your doctor about this and also, check out this website. You might find it very helpful.
http://www.state.nj.us/health/fhs/ppd/home.shtml

Best Wishes,
R.

Hi S.

After reading your post the first thing that came to my mind is post partum depression.But i am not sure if i would call it that-- You are def not being obsessive but you might need to see a medical professional and speak with them about your fears and just see if what you are feeling is indeed normal. You are like every mother in that you don't want your child to grow up to fast. We all go through that and have gone through that.My children are 4 and 19 mo and i often wonder where did the time go but that is what life is about. Growing, learning and then independence. Your child will always look to you for everything and anything so just remember that. I hope the best for you!! Good luck and God Bless you!!

I myself have not had experience with the "baby blues", but i have found myself in tears thinking about how fast she is growing. My daughter is 8 months old and I am also thrilled at how well she is thriving and she is so smart. It just seems like time is going too fast and if I blink she is going to be all grown up. My husband doesn't understand of course, I think these are all natural emotions of a mother, and we just have to cherish every moment we have while they are young. I don't have any advice, but I want you to know that you are not alone in your feelings.

It is completly normal expecally if this is your first child to feel this way. Just keep an eye on your feelings I had postpardum with both of my pregnancys but my second was worse since I no longer work outside my home. Make sure your talk to people and if your really concerned go see your doctor.

It's normal to want to keep the growth process at a slower pace because you want to cherish every second. My daughter is 2 1/2 years old and I get sad when I see her grow into the next size clothing and I also get sad that she is becoming more independent and needing me less and less. If this depression/sadness is affecting your every day 24/7 maybe you should go talk to a medical professional. They say that it takes a woman a full year for their body to get back to it's normal state. I have never heard of anyone having the baby blues for this long, so it may be best to seek some help. Good luck!!!!

Please my son is three and i still have it happen to me.. ANd yes i did get counseling. it helps.

I think its normal what your feeling only because you want the best for your son and he's moving at such a fast pace you want to enjoy the moments. I think your fine before you know it he's going to do everything by himself and the thought of depression will be so far gone.

Hi S. s. Yes you are very normal indeed i am a mother of 4, ages 34, 32 both married and two teens 15 and 14 and yes this is completely normal indeed ,,,i would love to hear from parents of teenagers on how to navigate some of their moods ,and how to deal with sibling rivalry between brothers and sisters as well, thanks ,,, as i am a mom of a 15 yr old son and 14 yr old daughter , sometimes i think i am going nuts , lol! Good luck S. s. I miss those baby hood days very much so!! C. h jersey city nj