Daughter Takes 2 Hours to Eat Dinner

My 4 year old is the EXACT same way at dinner. He gets up every 30 seconds to pick something up, give hugs, whatever he can do. At first we fed him, but at some point you have to say enough is enough. Now, he has 40 minutes to finish his meal. His drinks are limited-he can have 2 sips every 3 bites. He has to feed himself, and if he doesn't, then we take away the food and he goes to bed early. No snacks or drinks until breakfast. He went to bed hungry for maybe 4 or 5 days, but now he eats with minimal prodding. Good luck, this age is not fun!

maybe try again with the timer and tell her that when it goes off, if she is not finished, she loses her plate and that is it until the next meal. it sounds a little harsh, but i think it will only take a few meals before she sees that you are serious. also make sure that you get up once the timer goes off. if she has no audience, she will be less likely to play around.
HTH,

hey i feel for you. my daughter is 7 and she still takes forever to eat any meal.and i have tried everything. i had her eating alone in her room, but that didn't work. i had her at the table, and no dice.so now i kind of time her.and i tell her if she takes to long she gets no dessert.so when i tell her no dessert she knows now to eat a little faster.but hey sorry i'm not much of a big help. but i know what your going through.sooner or later they will realize they need to eat a little faster so there food isn't so cold.bye yajaira

My daughter is the same way. Some days I have luck by saying that only if she finished dinner will she get dessert. It doesn't always work. Using Halloween candy as an incentive seems to work better than ordinary desserts. I know my daugther eats good for lunch so I have stopped making a bit fuss about dinner.

Sounds like dinner has become a power struggle with your budding independant girl! Try making the experience positive, instead of using threats of taking away favotire toys, etc. She's exerting some independance and threats or lengthy lectures on the importance of eating will make her push back. Keep it simple: Tell your daughter the family eats dinner from 5-6 (or whatever), and that she can eat as much or as little as she wants during that time, but once dinner is over the food will be put away. If she gets up from the table or dallies around, just nicely remind her that she has "X minutes left before we clean up" and she may be hungry later if she doesn't eat (while you keep eating and enjoying your meal). When the time is up, excuse her and take away her plate. The key is to really do it; don't give in and give the plate back if she complains she's still hungry. She's had plenty of notice that mealtime was going to come to an end. She will learn in a few days that if she chooses not to eat, she'll be hungry when mealtime is over. Also, you can use a game within this time frame to get her to eat more; I used to tell the kids I nannied for "I bet I can eat more bites before the count of ten than you can!" Or somehting similar ("I bet you can't take two bites before I count to ten"). They always got so caught up in the game of beating the clock, they chowed down without even realizing it!

I, too, am a single mother who works full time. I have 2 shildren. My 2 1/2 year old daughter eats so little, that meal times have always been a bit frustrating. Instead of forcing her to eat when I say it's time, I sit her at the table while I feed my son. She doesn't have to eat her dinner, but she has to stay at the table until her brother is done. When meal time is over, I put her plate on her little play table for about a half hour so she can pick at it if she wants....she eats more this way than at the table. It may not be ideal, but my mom did the same thing for me when my pediatrician suggested it and it's worked for both of us. A couple other things to try...my daughter likes to pretend she's a bird, so I'll put some food on her fork and tell her she needs to eat her worms...she'll chirp and gobble them up. I also sometimes tell her that if she doesn't eat it, I'll gobble it up...guess she doesn't like that idea as it works quite often. Good luck to you and just remember to make meal time fun...it shouldn't come with punishments...easier for everyone that way.

my kids are on a time limit whatever not done in set time say 40 mins the food gets tooken away & nothing till next meal time..not even snacks & they have to eat some of the meal be4 getting a drink it helps when they know your serious.. taking away toys doesn't much help on eating food :(

I only have a young baby, so I don't really know what I'm talking about, but my gut feeling is that an actual tick tick timer is a bad idea. You don't want to create an eating disorder. Just be sweet and if she doesn't want to eat fine. Do something else.

hi C.! this is my first time on this site, so i'm not sure what the general feeling on being a "mean mom" is but i am one and in my opinion, i'd set a time limit. if she does not finish in that time limit, she does not finish. at 4yrs old she is capable of understanding that dinner time is dinner time. my daughter is 2 and she has two warnings to sit at the table to finish eating; 3rd time i have to ask, i take the food away.

my sister, who is now 17, was the same way too. she would take FOREVER to eat dinner, and finally my mother had to do this. i would recommend giving her 1hr to start with, and slowly reducing the time until she is eating in a timely manner.

i would absolutely not recommend feeding her or catering her. if she gets up to give you hugs, calmly and sternly redirect her back to the table without giving her a hug. it sucks to be mean, lol, but sometimes we have to. especially as single moms with no dads to lend a hand (i'm in the same boat right now)

good luck!

Is she having anything to drink before dinner, or finishing her drink with dinner before eating much? That could be it. Also, I don't know how much she is actually eating, but a childs stomach is only as big as their fist, so maybe try serving her smaller portions at first. I wouldn't keep up the airplane game, she is probably just enjoying it and wanting you to do it every night. Good luck! :o)

my 4 yr old son does that two..my 1 yr old does it sometimes too...I know it frustrating. I have gotten to the point when they do that I take it as a hint that they are done eating. They do it at lunch and breakfast too...I tell them if they dont eat they get no snacks until the next meal. It usually works. After a few times of her seeing that you arent going to play her game she'll learn that she needs to eat or it will be gone. Hope that helps. :)