Cry It Out During Naps

My son did not have a schedule when he was that age. He ate when he was hungry and slept when he was tired. Period. Wherever he was - in the stroller, in the car, on the floor - didn't matter to him or to me. And he did just fine like this in daycare - 3 days a week from 9 weeks of age.

I don't see what babies learn from crying without a parental response except that when they cry - no one comes to help them. Since they have no other 'acceptable' method of communication - this seems cruel to me.

I don't believe in letting a six month old cry more than 5 minutes. Any age more than about 10 minutes. My answer probably isn't going to be popular, but I think a baby needs to feel safe. Maybe your baby doesn't need so many naps.

How about letting him lie in a car seat or playpen in a room where you are busy? If he is tired he may fall asleep there.

I never pushed sleep training at nap time because, like your son, mine would put up a lengthly fight, which only lead to him being overtired and getting off schedule.

No, too young for sleep training.

Dr. Sears has some really great expert advice here though that may help:
http://askdrsears.com/topics/parenting/sleep-problems

This is what I would do....

Swaddle if he likes that.
Paci if he likes that.
Routine- put him down at the same time everyday with the same routine (however long or short you wish)
Make sure he is fed and clean.
Use white noise (fan) to minimize disturbances.
Keep room dark and calm.
Put him down drowsy but NOT asleep!

He needs about 15hrs if sleep (average) per day. If he is sleeping 12 hrs at night, for ex, his naps should be around 3 hrs total (not necessarily in one nap). Babies his age typically take 2-3 naps/day around the times you mentioned.

Whatever you do/he does to get to sleep (nurse, rock, paci, cry, shush, etc) will most likely be what he needs to get back to sleep after each sleep cycle (25-45min). Do only what you are willing/able to continue. Eventually he will need to learn to get back to sleep himself. When you feel comfortable letting him do that is up to you. I have seen it done successfully at 5mo and 10mo and everything in between. He will be okay if you let him figure it out now.

Babies need sleep for brain development. Letting him get the sleep he needs is very good for him. If he is fed, clean, and you have played/held him and he is stil fussy, he is probably tired. Find a routine and stick to it. After a few days, all will be settled and you both will be more rested and happier.

Yes babies need lots of sleep, but by 3 mnths they only need about 15 hours of sleep total. My daughter is 2.5 mnths and takes a 30min morning nap (once she is up for two hours) then takes a 3 hr afternoon nap, then a 45 minute evening nap (seriously 45 min everytime...its like she has a watch lol) then sleeps about 12 hrs at night. Maybe your trying to make your baby sleep to much (the only babies that need 18-21 hrs of sleep are newborns.

Did you swaddle him when he was younger? if you did he may need to be swaddled again but maybe not as tight as when he was when he was a newborn and with a bigger blanket that is not fleece (did I spell that right?), sounds like a comfort thing...try putting him somewhere else other than his crib to nap it maybe too quiet in his room if you have things like music, TV, dishwasher and such going during the day, I have a play pen in my livingroom for my two year old to nap in although she prefers her bed at this point, when she was younger she wanted to nap in there because she could hear me when downstairs in the playpen. Hang in there mommy babies routines change often it never stays the same once we think we have it figured out they change it up on us so just keep trying things till you two figure it out.

Sleep training is the hardest thing I ever had to do (next to the first day at preschool!!!) Maybe try doing it in stages, Super Nanny style....
first few nights, just a short cuddle
next few nights, just a back rub from the standing position
next few nights, sit down next to the crib
next few, closer to the door
next few, in the hallway
then hopefully no more..

Remember though, once you start, you CANNOT go back to your old ways. Consistency is KEY! If the child believes that you will come if he keeps crying, then he will keep crying. Children learn what we teach them, (ie. if I cry long enough, she will come and hold me), even if we do not intend to teach the lesson we did!

This scenario is ideal though and no one kid will do it perfectly. Every child is different so don't believe that there is a one size fits all approach. I did it when my kids were closer to a year, though I regretted waiting so long. I had to wait with my second though because he had digestive issues. And don't beat yourself up if the next morning you find that he was crying because of a dirty diaper. It happens to all of us!

And if you haven't started teaching him a couple of sign language signs (like for eating, drinking and dirty diaper -the three most useful in my opinion), I highly recommend it. They will help both of you when you struggle to communicate, not just at night but all the time! Good luck!

Oh my! isn't sleep training fun....it is always something or the other.....other than breastfeeding this has been the most frustrating aspect of parenting for me.....we tried the modifed CIO for nighttime sleep...where we let our LO go to sleep on his own but we didn't leave him alone....I sat with him the whole time...we made a makeshift bed on the floor of his room (or you could have him in the crib and stand over him) and then we just sat and let him figure it out...cried for 40 minutes the first night, 15 the next and now no crying....but our baby was having trouble sleeping for naps and at night.....a good book suggestion is The Baby Whisperer by Tracy Hogg....I found this book to be the most helpful and more along the lines of our parenting style....you have set him back a bit by giving in a picking him up so this is going to be a little hard.....good luck!!

Hi M.,
At 6 months, I was giving my sons a nap every 3 hours or so (and sleeping 10 to 11 hours through the night): babies need LOTS of sleep.

Next, some of the best advice I ever got was: put baby down for a nap while he is still *awake*. I kid you not. It was a beautiful routine with both my babies: they knew the nap was coming, because there was a "routine" to it (yes, babies are aware of routines). My older son would even arch his back trying to see the crib as I walked him into his bedroom! Then, your sweetie doesn't suddenly wake up, and he's in a different place than when he fell asleep.

Good luck!
t