Body Odor in New Au Pair

Maybe she has problems with her sense of smell and cannot really smell that well? Maybe you should try testing her in a tactful way? Ask her opinion on some perfumes you might have around -or go to the Mall to the perfumes section. If you become convinced that she's lacking sniffing power then I would say go ahead and tell her that her clothes don't smell very fresh at all, and that your nose is extremely sensitive because of the PG. If she is a sensible person she should be amenable.

Or maybe the sweaters smell like "Home" and they make her feel less homesick when she has that smell around her?

Being direct is best. I know something about it. My poor husband had to confront more than a few of his employees about their Body Odor. It is a difficult subject but if it is bothering you that badly you need to say something.

A.,

I don't have great advice for you as I have never had an Au Pair before...but I might be really direct but apologetic and tell her straight out that for some reason the smell of her sweaters is making you feel sick..you know this sounds nuts but you're very pregnant and would she be willing to allow you to have them cleaned...I sympathize with you, I know exactly how you are feeling...I was so hyper sensitive to smells and lived in NYC during the summer months when I was 7 months pregnant...the smells would hit me like a kick in the face. Good luck with this problem.
Can I ask you a question? I am looking for an au pair and thought perhaps I could ask you a few questions...I'm concerned since my husband and I won't be home all day (we work in NYC)and live in Garden City. Have you ever had any weird incidences, are au pairs typically very young girls? Are they responsible enough to know what to do if my son is sick or injured? I don't want to make a mistake and put my son's health at risk but perhaps I am going overboard...appreciate your advice.

I would just be direct and tell her that her scent whether it be BO or perfume is very strong to you and that since you are pregnant, ask her please to wash all her clothing ( i think the washing machine is best not dry cleaning ) because you are sensitive to certain scents...tell her everything bothers your nose and stomach not just her scent..

ah, tricky situation
anything brought up re: this subject, any way of approach will end up offending her. do you notice her doing her laundry? did the odor become obvious now that she's wearing sweaters? or does she use those 'balls' don't know what they're called but they're huge in europe to keep somekind of bugs away from clothes. those balls go in the dresser around clothes, and are used year round but mainly used for knit stuff, wool etc.
my mom used to use those and man they smelled bad. no washing made the smell go away. not even dry cleaning.
as a european i'd tell you i'd be offended if something like this were to be brought up. i had an american (meeting for first time) who asked me if i shaved because he had heard frenchwomen don't shave. hahaha funny, considering i am not french but also because i thought it was inappropriate to be asked such a question.

i'd weight in what's more important? her being good with your kids or her smelling good? this topic will make her feel uneasy and always on guard when around you which may lead to her not doing a great job anymore.
ps danish (nordic people in general not just danish) are known to be very educated, very 'clean' well-kept etc.
just my 2 cents

Hey A.,
Sensitive issue... how awkward. My family is currently hosting an au pair from Germany. Impeccable hygiene. Perhaps your au pair is so used to the smell she doesn't realize it? Being direct is best, I've found. Hope this worked out for you. Congrats on your baby.

A. M

I would be very careful about how you discuss it with her so you don't offend her. Blame it on your pregnancy and say that maybe you are crazy. Explain to her that your pregnancy makes you smell things that most people can't smell. I remember when I was pregnant I was visiting my in-laws house, which is a huge 3 story and I could smell the sandwich my mother-in-law was making in the kitchen while I was upstairs on the other side of the house. Explain that real or imagined, you feel like something in the house smells bad and that you would really feel better if you just got her sweaters cleaned. Don't ask if they need to be cleaned, insist on it. And blame the need to clean on nesting too. Then set aside a day to clean the whole house so that her room can be "de-contaminated" without it looking like it's just her room.
Also, could it be that she uses a deodorant without an antiperspirant in it? Once my husband accidentally bought a deodorant instead of his usual antiperspirant and I noticed that he smelled bad even when he had not been to the gym or anything. As soon as he bought his regular one the smell went away. The antiperspirant keeps you from sweating, while the deodorant just attempts to cover up the smell. Check the label on her deodorant. It should have aluminum in it. If not, go out and buy a good one for her (maybe the new Secret Clinical Strength- that's supposed to be really strong) and just leave it in her room. Beyond that, I'm not really sure what you can do.