Biting - Bellevue, NE

I had this problem with my younger one. He just liked the sensation on his gums. I finally started carrying a frozen teething ring. When ever he would go to bite someone I would put the teething ring in his mouth. If I was not quick enough I would use a firm "no" and set him down. He learned real fast that he was missing out because he was biting.
Hope that helps.

I have to agree with Tracy. We tried everything with our then 11 month old and the only thing that worked was biting her back. That was the last time she ever tried again.

I agree with Kayla & Tracy. Biting back does work. It sounds extreame, but if nothing else works for you, you might want to try it. My youngest sister was a biter. Mom got to a point where she let us bite back (explaining to us all why). It was always supervised, and never allowed to get out of hand. But Sissy learned very quickly she didn't like it!
I hope you find a solution. Good luck!

Hi K.,
My daughter (now three years old) used to bite for 'fun', I was lucky because it was usually only me she would do it to (or unlucky) but I remember it worrying me immensely, and I think she was about that age. One day, she just stopped, I don't remember the day, I just look back now and see that it happened she never bit again. Anyway, the mother's creed 'this too shall pass' is not much comfort while you're waiting for something to pass, but I can assure you this phase most certainly will. Until that time, what I did was to give her the least amount of reaction as possible. I would not react except to say no and walk away. I think what they want is a reaction (I think the reaction amuses them), so that is the one thing I didn't give except to tell her (in as level a tone as you can after being bit on the inside of the leg) 'No, don't bite'.

AND PLEASE DO NOT BITE BACK. The end does not justify the means, I don't care if the lesson is learned right then and there. It isn't worth losing your moral authority. If biting is wrong, and this is the message you want to send, biting your child does not send it. What it does tell them is that biting is 'okay' if you're bigger than they are.

K.,
We found that our twins tend to bite our clothing when their teeth are bothering them. For us, giving them a cold washcloth or a refrigerated teething ring seemed to help. Good luck!
J.

Biting back may seem mean, but when I was little I used to bite thinking I was kissing. She might not understand that it hurts unless she feels it for herself. It's not being hypocritical, it's just teaching her that it hurts.

good luck

At early ages children understand no, and take it more seriously if used sparatically. My daughter is 12 mo. and knows that the stove is a NO NO. She points at it and says "No No" and doesn't go near it.
Teach your daughter that biting is a NO NO! Anytime she does it have her look at you in the eyes and pinch her cheeks lightly together and tell her NO. Be serious in your voice, it'll get her attention and she'll see you aren't playing. Remember to stay consistent.

I use lemon juice on my daughter every time she bites I put a little on the tip of my finger and put it on her tounge. It has helped alot she does occasionally still bite but not as often.

my son who is almost 3, used to do this around that time as well. it's age appropriate behavior. i don't feel it should be punished, but redirected. right when she bites, move her away from who ever she bit, look her in the face and in a low tone. say no bite! it took my son about a week to get the idea. you can use a lower stern tone without being angry or scaring her. from what i've learned, it's the way they are trying to express themselves since maybe they don't have all the words in their vocabulary yet to say what they want to say.
good luck i hope you are able to find something that works for you and your daughter

I am not sure how this will be received... but I had an issue with my oldest child when she was a baby. (She is almost 13 now.) She bit a plug out of my leg one time when she was mad. My immediate reaction was to bite her back so she knew what "OUCH" or "HURT" meant. I did bite her (not near what she did to me!!) and she never bit again!!! NOW. I have a 14 month old son now and he started in with the biting. I didn't want to bite him, but "NO" stopped working. I finally gave in and bit him when he bit me but I didn't bite him hard, I bit just enough for him to feel that it doesn't feel good. He didn't cry at all, he just looked at me, then looked at his finger as if to say "OUCH"... He stopped biting. Once you establish and they recognize the meaning of "ouch" or "hurt", it's easier to break them but how else do you teach them that unless they feel pain. Of course, when they fall and cry, you can say "ouch, I bet that hurt". That will help them associate the words with pain, but until then... it's very difficult.

On the other hand. One thing we did discover, when he stopped listening to "NO"... we started telling him to "STOP!" That worked!! We say it in a loud, stern, sharp tone and he immediately stops. When I say "NO" he just laughs.

And the other day, it was so funny, he picked up a candle (not lit... it is a decorative candle) and started walking across the room with it. I asked him in the sweetest voice "whatcha got there little man?" Totally threw him off!! HAHAHA He went right back and put the candle down. HAHAHA We laughed for 10 minutes straight on that one!

Hi K.,

I am a 38 yr old mom of two. 16 yr old boy and 7 yr old girl. I stayed home for almost Madison's first 5 years and I did daycare for several of my local neighbors children.

I had one child (girl) that I cared for from the time she was 4 months old. She did exactly as you described. She would bite Madison just out of the blue with no provoking. There would be days when my daughter would have several bite marks all over her body.

What I found was "Kyra" liked the stimulation she got from the reaction of Madison crying from the bite and my reaction to the situation. I also had older daycare children and she seemed to not bite when they were home as she was being stimulated with their interaction with her.

I realized that leaving the two young toddlers alone to play was not satisfying enough for her and that I may have been showing more attention to my daughter and she noticed it. I didn't want to stop watching her as I loved her as mine so I began having them both sit with me to read, we started to learn to color together and PUZZLES!! The hard board style ones made just for their little minds.

She finally stopped biting my daughter. This was the turning point in my daycare. I became very structural from that point on from eating, napping and activities. The biting began to dwindle from several times a day to maybe 1 or 2 xms. Then a whole day without it then a week and so on. All of my children stayed with me until they went to school all 7 of them :-)

I am happy to say now they are both 7 yrs old, still the best of friends. She's extremely intelligent but does still get bored easily. She still has some behavioral issues at school but she is just one that needs to have that extra time from her parents and friends. I don't think it's an insecurity but more of she knows what she wants but getting others to know what she wants is more of a challenge. She can be an emotional young girl at times but again just needs that extra hug or special quiet time with the special people in her life. Her parents divorced and moved away a year ago but we have made sure the girls still get together on a regular basis.

Please keep me posted !

Be Well,

J. S

Well when kids have a tendency to bite sometimes they just get into the habit because when they're teething it feels good to chew & bite but they don't understand that it really does hurt. I know biting back sounds very mean & to some even hypocritical but not teaching them could be even more mean because not every phase passes with every child. My son is in first grade & one of his classmates was STILL biting. Unfortunately, they sent her back to Kindergarden until they could get the biting under control. If you don't teach them that it's wrong & it hurts, they can't get out of the habit. That is just making it harder for them later on.

You're right, 14 months is just too young to do any kind of discipline for that sort of thing. She just won't understand it and will just look at it as you are mad at her, without really knowing why. Maybe try to have something on hand whenever you or someone else is holding her. When she seems like she's going to bite, give her a teething toy. Something cold, or squishy, since she seems to like the feel of skin. She doesn't mean to do it, she's just making her gums feel better. If she does bite, I would say, "no no", not really in a mean voice, just a regular one, and give her a teething toy and say, "you bite this, not mommy". She'll begin to understand if you consistently do this.