Am I Crazy to Leave My Job?

I agree with everybody here, I was in the same situation, I hated my job and was coming home mad everyday, I know this sounds crazy, but the day I quit I felt very very happy :)) Now I have 2 kids I am working from home now.

You may find life much more enjoyable leaving and you won't miss that 60% difference! I say quit enjoy the summer with the kids and then move on!

I would keep the job for now and see how it is living on one salary. Save yours and when the time comes to relocate, quit.

Start living on one salary now. Put your salary into savings and don't touch it. Stay at your current job until they move, then file for your unemployment benefits. You'll then have 4 months of salary in savings, plus your unemployment. Then if something happens and you're not able to find a job you'll have some savings to fall back on. It will also give you and idea of what you'll have to do to cut back costs.

O. thing I know, at age 47, having worked FT, PT and everything in between--you manage on what you make. If you're that miserable, I'd leave. Self respect has gotta be worth 60% of your salary, right?

If your family can take the change of you leaving the job, I say compromise. Stay in it as long as you can and sock away as much money as you can. Start changing how your family lives lifestyle-wise NOW to what it will need to be when you make the change. That way it won't be so drastic and you'll have some "practice" at it.

I'm wondering if you might be able to collect unemployment if they let you go because the company is relocating and you chose not to - that would be a very large plus as opposed to losing that potential transitional income if you were to just quit.

If you have friends/family that you can talk to that aren't connected with the company so that word doesn't get back to them, start brainstorming about your consulting so that you're not starting from zero when you make the move to leave. Good luck!

Stay with them until they want you to move and tell them you won't move your family. Let them FIRE you or lay you off, then you can get unemployment for a while. If it's work from home, why do you have to move? Work from homes have always seemed like a dream to me... I wish I had one (not crazy like yours lol) but I can never find legit no up front cost job.

I understand how you feel, I wouldn't uproot my daughter. Even if your making 40% weigh the pros and cons. Besides the money it seems like everything else about the job is a con. But what you list as pros of quitting seem great. Good luck babe. Let us know what you decide :D

Number one job rule: Always let them fire/lay you off, do not everrrrr quit! lol. It could also backfire if it's on your resume because other jobs might be like uh oh she won't travel for us... could cost you a job. Even if you won't travel I wouldn't advertise it up front.

Life's too short to spend it doing something you hate! When you look back on your life are you going to think "gee, I'm so glad I stayed at that miserable job"? or "I'm so thankful I got to spend so much time with my children when they were little"? I'm guessing the latter.

Yes, you might have to tighen your belts financially, but if you can find part time work doing something you enjoy it will ease a bit. Be an example for your children. Would you advise *them* to stay in a job they hate?

Ultimately you have to do what's best for you and your family. But since you asked....no, you're NOT crazy!! Best of luck :o)

Words of advice:
Learn to live on one salary BEFORE you quit your job. It is at times impossible for even highly educated, degreed, and experienced people to find adequate jobs right now. You NEED to know you can pay your house, cars, whatever other things you have without this job for an extended period of time. If you quit your job with no plan and no resources, yes...you are crazy! If you're careful and plan...you're not crazy!

If you can stand it, hold out for a bit. Usually when a company moves they offer for their employees to move as well. If the employees elect not to move most companies give them a very nice severance package. Start making changes in your family budget now. It sounds as if you and hubby have already crunched the numbers and can make it work on the reduced salary. If you can stand it, work right up to the move and sock away your entire check from now until then. Take the severance package offered and sock that away as well. By that time you should have a nice little nest egg to fall back on should you hit rough times and have difficulty finding another job locally. You can then switch your girls to part time preschool and enjoy your time with them without having to stress or worry about finding consulting jobs right away. Good Luck and God Bless.

Well your going to get my opinion here...if you quit your job willingly I honestly don't feel you deserve unemployment (you'll probably get it...but wouldn't deserve it) This is coming from a family of a single income who had only bread winner laid off and we REALLY truley needed the money. Doing it willingly is; well, not fair to the others.

On that note, I have met very many people in our life time we have moved to a few different states for school and work and well in all honesty I don't think family's that are use to a high income can truley survive off of less without going into debt or have other issues. You just get too use to your spending habbits and it is hard to stop it. You might think you can and believe you can but in all reality you CAN'T.

That all being said, start the job hunt now, that way when you either decide to stop working or get fired (laid off) you have a head start.

It is when people make selfish decisions like this that make it harder for those who really fight to make it. You realize that your unemployment although "low" for NM could feed clothes and house a family in real need for a year or more on your salary.

On another though from reading a previous post on your husband and you not doing well together....this makes this an ever bigger crazy idea in my opinion.

0

I fear for you cutting your income so much. With gas and food prices on the rise, are you sure your family could handle the loss of income? If you really do think you have a chance of talking your VP into letting you continue working from home, then give that some more consideration before letting what sounds like a really lucrative position go in the face of our current economy.

I think deep down you already know the answer. Change and the unknown is a scary thing. You find ways to make things work on a reduced budget. Plus being there for your children is something none of you will regret!!!

I felt like you did regarding the stress and your boss. I couldn't do it anymore...you are good, you lasted 8 years..me only 5. I ended up starting a home business and really treating it as a business and have done very well, as all people who treat it as a business and not a hobby. You are already focused and are disciplined to be able to work from home, you really need to consider a home business. The flexibility is great and income potential can replace your FT income. Good luck!

Not enough information for real solid advice. I think the important thing to do is a hypothetical forecast of your household finances if you were unable to find employment for a year or more, and you were unable to make 40 percent of your present income consulting for your husband. In a nutshell, can you live on just your husband's salary alone for a year or longer, and still maintain your quality of life?

I say this because the reality of the employment market place right now is that companies are even cutting down on using consultants as a way to cut costs. Even more are doing lay offs, and there is sooo much competition right now for the few jobs that are available.

I have so many friends and aquaintances who have been out of work for months up to 2 and half years ( for one friend). And if those who have managed to find work after layoffs, the cut in pay is crippling.

We have three friends who have lost their homes due to unexpected long-term unemployment. Sure they all started out fine for the first 6 months to a year, but when work didn't come easily after the unemployment benefits were spent, and savings were depleted, followed up by horrible financial setbacks etc. because the money was drying up. I know that some of these friends will not recover from this any time in the near future.

The friend who has been unemployed for 2 1/2 years had to file bankruptcy 2 months ago. And while he manages to "consult" in his field (in which at one time he was making 6 figures, highly sought after, and has an MBA) he can barely make ends meet, and is now renting month to month a townhouse from another family in a similar situation which is currently in foreclosure and trying to relocate to another state for work.

After this friend's current consulting contract is up in two weeks, he has nothing lined up, nothing in savings (because of the bankruptcy), 4 kids, and wife who isn't working and nowhere to go because the people he is renting from will probably have lost their home to a sheriff's auction by then. Sounds like a soap opera, too surreal to be true, but this is what is happening out there.

I think you're crazy if you can't live on your husband's salary alone, his company isn't stable, or is commission/sales based and therefore unpredictible, or you won't have health benefits, or your debt load would suddenly get away from you if you were unable to find work after leaving.

It doesn't take much to lose everything...even with a safety net in the bank . These are strange times, and keeping a job is like musical chairs. If you hop off the chair and don't get on another one quick enough, you'll find yourself out of the game, with no promise of another round.

I say go to Washington D.C. if you are the bread winner...or be prepared for anything that may come if you risk staying in your current home with no clear game plan and guaranteed income to meet all of your financial obligations.

At the very least, maybe the new locale will mean a better, more energized working environment. At worst, even after relocation, your company is moving toward downsizing like so many others, and you find yourself out of work down the line anyway...so the decision is made for you. A scenario ot unheard of these days. I'd definitely find out what's up with your job and why every thing is headed out East. If it's an actual government job, and not an org. contracted by the government, how will the looming Gov't shutdown affect your job and the future of your organization? Definitely something to think about.

I think if you have already carefully put much thought and consideration into leaving your career, then the answer is to leave. A job is like a marriage. If you truly love it, you stay. If you hate it, you leave. If I were you, I would be saving as much money as possible now with the realization that you may have to downsize your lifestyle to fit the one salary household.

This is not an easy decision. Always remember too, that when one door closes, another will open, meaning you may find another job. I wish you the best.

M.

Sounds like you already know the answer here, you just need someone to tell you that money isn't everything. Well, it isn't. Your family is. Your kids are.

Do what you have to in order to cut your expenses and you'll find that living modestly is a walk in the park compared to being miserable at work and missing out on the most wonderful years in your children's lives. When your kids are grown and in college, when they're married and even have kids of their own, you will always, ALWAYS, think back to that time when you could still cuddle them in your arms and kiss away their boo-boos.

You're doing the right thing, T.. You're putting your happiness and your family above the almighty dollar. Tomorrow, you could lose everything. The nice house could burn down, the economy could collapse (even more) and you BOTH could be out of work. But you would have each other. You would have your beautiful family together and that's all that would matter.

This is a step of faith, more than anything. But remember that nothing is a surprise to God. Give your worries to Him, and make the leap. I have no doubt that you will be richly blessed. :-)

follow your insticts: I'd imagine that you'll be soooo much more fulfilled, won't miss the extra income, and LOVE your life if you make this change! Being a stay at home mom has been the best thing I've ever experienced. And I love getting creative in the finances department :) Good luck!!

Your plan sounds fantastic, but unreasonable. Have you paid off the house or perhaps a car to prepare for this huge change?

I think the economy is still grim and, with the disaster in Japan, the quarterly results over the next 6 months may feel the pinch from manufacturing and supply shortages... As in, corporate America might have more lay offs before this year is over. I'd keep the job, push it out to the last possible day before quitting.

Good luck!

.

As long as you come up with a budget plan, you will be very happy. Our society drives us to work more, make more, and spend more, all at the expense of our sanity, our family and all the things that REALLY matter. My husband and I made the decision a few years ago to go against the status quo: we downsized to a much smaller home, both went part-time at work and made our schedules so one of us is always home for our kids. We had to redo our budget but the housing savings alone was huge. We have never been happier and because of simplifying we never get into debt and always have enough for everything we need. Things happen for a reason. All the best to you ((()))

If you can figure out a way to do it, I think it is brave to quit your job and try something new. Good salaries (or any secure salary) is a good thing, but happiness counts for so much more! I wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide.

Here's what I would do: Sit down ASAP and go through your finances. Start revamping your budget and cutting back. Create a monthly (or weekly) budget based on what you will be making (the 40% of your current $), or if you are staying home & not working at all.

Then, over the next 2 months, live off that new, reduced budget. This will allow you to save the $ from your current job, and will also allow you some freedom to adjust a bit/some wiggle room for overspending the budget as you adjust. Then, the money you save is a cushion for expensives while you're on unemployment and/or until you decide whether you want to work or stay home.

When you do your budget, be thorough, but be realistic. If you're both coffee junkies, and love that morning espresso (or what have you) come up with some alternatives to it, so you don't feel "deprived." Think about trading in one of your cars for a less expensive/more efficient one, etc. I highly recommend The Tightwad Gazette for a huge variety of frugal tips.

Good luck! :)

A happy mom means a happy dad and kids,and everyone deserves to be happy, so if leaving this job will allow you to be happy again, that is wonderful! Above anyone your family and yourself will benefit more than you know. You should consider how much less exactly you will be making, which cuts on what things you will have to accept, and if THOSE cuts will be ok, OR will they be too much to handle. Money too can also bring stress on you, trust me on that. IF those cuts that you will have to make are not that much, then go for it ASAP, and grab the severance package. The ONLY thing that we NEED money for is food clothing and shelter....Our happiness is so much more important than anything else. ESPECIALLY for our kids to see :) They are # 1 and they would probably be happy living in a tent in the woods if everyone was happy laughing and having a good time, wouldn't they :) Don't Worry, Be Happy.....lol...jk

If you waited out the summer, and made the extra money available, would you be able to drop all the money you earn on paying off your cars, or some other bills? That way when you have lower income, you would also lower your bills.

You say you would make about 40% of your income, but if you paid off some of your debts and got rid of the childcare situation, you would probably be making the same amount, and be much happier.

I am going through the same type of ordeal, I hate my job, so I decided to quit, go back to school for a year to finish a higher degree, and then move up the ladder. It will be tight, but the extra time with my daughter and the possibilities that will open up afterward far outweigh the money right now.

Nothing can put a pricetag on time spent with kids while they are young enough to really enjoy your company... it won't be long til they are teens and want nothing to do with you, lol.

Hope everything works out for you... go with your gut! Mom's are usually right!

So glad you figured out what's best for your family! When my DS was born 6 years ago we faced the decision of working full time. We decided to make the sacrafices for the sake of being home with the kids now 6 and 4 this Saturday. I am only working about 1 day a week and only making about 10-15% of my previous pay, and we couldn't be happier. It's amazing the small changes you can make and still make ends meet! Congrats!

If you will be happier, go for it! It sounds like you have thought through what the consequences would be of leaving your job (less money coming in, etc) and that you would be okay with it. Sit down and figure out your budget, make sure you can afford the decision you are making, and if you can quit, do it. I work full time, but love my job. I know we have too much debt for me to quit. However, if we could afford me staying at home, I would just to be able to spend so much extra time with my son and the dogs (our first babies)!

I think it's awesome that you want to take care of yourself! Congratulations! I wish more people would find jobs that they love rather then be in a job that sucks the life out! I believe that when you listen to your gut/heart not your brain, it all works out, other doors will open!

T. - I have been there with the crazy bosses and feel for you. It sounds like ultimately, the goal is for you to stay home or at least take a break from this job and find something more fulfilling. You should definitely do that if at all possible because you only have one life to live and there is no reason to be miserable!

I would try to make the transition as easy as financially smart as possible though. As many below have said, try to hold out until they lay you off due to the move so you can get unemployment. It also lets you tell future employers that the choice to quit wasn't yours - the company moved. Even though it isn't fair, I do think some employers would question why someone would quit a job in this economy.

As to the money, do start living one the reduced income right now and see if you can do it. Also, take on some small jobs for those potential clients now while you are still employed so that you can see if you really like consulting and can make what you want to make on the projects. It also builds up your client base so that when you do make the change you already have some funds flowing in. Good luck to you - you can do it!

I think you should go for it! You obviously have a fabulous skill set and with your husband on board I have no doubt you can manage just fine. You will find the work or the work will find you, but these are years you will never get back to spend with your children. I have always liked nice things too and strive hard for them, but I learned a long time ago that the more time I invest in my relationships with the people I care most about than material possessions, the better the return on my investment. Yes, you may end up making less, but then again you may find you do not even care because of the joy this new opportunity may bring you. It seems like you have come to a crossroads in your life, don't let fear keep you from what could be your true happiness. Good luck!
A.

Well, you already mentioned that you'll be pretty much out of a job come the end of summer. So, it's not a matter of if, but, when. Personally, if you can swing it financially, I'd quit now and spend some quality time with the kids. You can spend the summer redoing your resume and starting the job hunt unless you decide to work for your hubsband's business.

My vote: Leave now, take the 2 months severance, and start thinking about what you will do next.

Reason:
1) You hate your job (this is also 2 & 3)
4) Your job is ending anyway. And usually the last few months before they close a place are the craziest. Why go through the extra stress? And usually if you are laid off you can still get unemployment. Check the rules in New Mexico.

I think that you are just looking for reassurance, but as you are only talking about 6 months max before you are on the street anyway, I say go for it. Why miss summer with your kids for a job you hate?

Your level of crazy or not is purely dependent upon the level of income your family can afford to lose. If you can be at peace with a reduce standard of living, go for it. If not, you are indeed crazy and are setting yourself up for long term dissatisfaction of a greater magnitude.

You have done it for eight years, unless you feel you will self destruct if you wait it out until summer, stay on for the sake of your family. When they understand that you will not relocate, they will either let you work from home and you won't have to deal with your A Hole boss as much as now and your life will be better OR, you can say sorry, I can't move my family.

If it was just YOU, then I would say the same thing except, if you had a meltdown you could tell them to take their job and SHOVE IT!

I left a very good job last October, very nice $$ but a lot of craziness....looking back, I don't miss a thing except the $$, but I'm on my own and have a side income. I still need to work, but NOT everyday.

I wish you all the best....keep us posted.

Blessings...

Of course you're not crazy. Do it.

YAY!!! It is such a personal decision whether to be a working parent or a stay-at-home parent. If you have the option of staying home and choose to do so, great. The same goes for working. I feel the main problem is feeling forced to do either. That being said, it is so refreshing to hear that you made the choice to stay at home, for awhile at least. I made the choice to walk away from a great-paying job after I had my first child, and while I miss working at times and am not really a fan of the mundane tasks that come from staying at home, I would not trade any of it for being there for my children and seeing every milestone. I didn't want any regrets later in life after they were raised and wishing I had been there more instead of having more "things". So good luck to you! It sounds like you've really put a lot of thought and concern into your decision and I'm sure your kids will be really happy with having mom around more. : )

I honestly think before you make a decision such as this one research job prospects for yourself. the economy is so bad many people are out of work unwillingly. This is coming from a person with masters degree. I think the fact that you work from home should give you some relief not to have to get frustrated by the people you work for. If i were you I'd stick it out, beg if i had to to continue working, and when the economy turns around you can look for something else. i fear this stay at home mom thing for a few months will turn into years. SAHM is not glitz and glory. It's hard work, sometimes unappreciative and you will lose a major part of yourself, especially if you used to have a career. think it through. 2 months severence package is nothing. it will go by before you blink. and then what?

You have done it for eight years, unless you feel you will self destruct if you wait it out until summer, stay on for the sake of your family. When they understand that you will not relocate, they will either let you work from home and you won't have to deal with your A Hole boss as much as now and your life will be better OR, you can say sorry, I can't move my family.

If it was just YOU, then I would say the same thing except, if you had a meltdown you could tell them to take their job and SHOVE IT!

I left a very good job last October, very nice $$ but a lot of craziness....looking back, I don't miss a thing except the $$, but I'm on my own and have a side income. I still need to work, but NOT everyday.

I wish you all the best....keep us posted.

Blessings...

I was in similar situation after my daughter was born. I quit my job and while it was a little challenging in the beginning eliminating an income it was so worth it. My family and I are sooooo much happier. Things always work out as they should in my mind. After 6 weeks off work, consulting work fell in my lap and I have been doing it ever since. I work from home, make my own schedule, and enjoy having a hand in things while being able to spend so much time with my family. After reading your post I think you already know the decision just need a little reassurance:-)
Good luck!

i would start applying for other jobs that you are qualified to do NOW like start monday applying for jobs and then by the end of may middle june you will be able to know if you will be able to get a different job and will still be able to stay at home with the kids