Aggressive First Grader

Before considering a therapist, I would look at how much physical activity he gets each day. All kids need lots of exercise and most do not get enough. This can result in aggressive behavior.

Any type of activity is good, especially if he enjoys it. My daughter and I are both training in Karate. This has been a great experience for both of us. It redirects aggression and teaches self-control and confidence. I highly recommend any type of martial arts for all kids - aggressive or timid. We go to National Karate, and there are other good ones in the Mpls area.

I have a newsflash for you. . . you have a little boy. Traditional school systems are not geared toward the way a little boy's body and brain work. That said, he does need to learn, but I question the competency of the teacher. Is she new? Does she have extra kiddo in the classroom? My son is a talker/fidgeter, but his teacher has the ability to work with him and she has a number of lessons that are set up for the varying learning abilities. That said, one day a substitute sent my son to the Asst. Principal for talking - TALKING?? I did not make light of it in front of him - he had to write an appology to the sub, to the Asst. Principal and his teacher. (My punishment.)
But I did talk to his regular teacher and she said that the sub was in over her head and didn't respond appropriately.
Gosh, Just based on what you put here, I am not sure if therapy would be where I jumped to, but I know I don't have the whole story.
I would defiantely follow up in person with the Dean of Students to find out why your son was sent to the office for, consider some IQ testing and then figure out the punishment process for the classroom.
Whew! good luck!

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I think Christy makes some really good points. There is a difference between the way that boys and girls act, respond and learn and a lot of times boys behavior is seen as as disruptive, which it can be, although it might be totally age appropriate. I think you're doing the right thing. Maybe I read incorrectly, but I didn't think there seemed to be a communication issue as much. I thought when you didn't get a note that there were no issues? Anyway, I would set up a meeting with the teacher, an administrator and someone like a school counselor or something. Most schools have a team/commitee that helps students who are having repeated issues, so I would ask the teacher about that too. Find out what the real issue is. Go and observe the classroom if necessary, although you should know that if he sees you he will automatically act differently, but it's still a good idea. Most importantly I think it's great to know that you are being invested and involved, you will figure it out!

I agree with Sue W. Kids, especially boys, need exercise. I'm glad you're going to talk to the teacher. You need to figure out what he/she considers "aggressive." Maybe the teacher is new and doesn't have kids of their own.

Seven year olds have trouble expressing what's wrong with words. Also, female teachers sometimes expect all kids to act like good little girls. Boys simply can't do that and take it out in other ways. Karate is excellent for teaching kids self-discipline and limits.

Your son may open up to his dad or other nurturing male. Too often schools are all run by women, and boys need to learn how to act like a man--from a man.

My son is in first grade and he has no problems at school but he is so aggresive at home too. Esp with his sister. I am interested in the advice you get too. I am glad i am not the only one.

There's no harm in asking his pediatrician about the behavior issues. You may get referred to a therapist or another specialist, or maybe not.

Overly aggressive behavior that results in special action at school can be a red flag that it's time to get medical guidance. The aggression may be out of his control. Not all boys out there are singled out for aggressive behavior, so don't minimize your concerns thinking "Boys will be boys."

You've gotten some great advice! I'd just add my two cents by saying if it were my son, I'd be in that classroom for an observation (even just an hour, or if you can longer). I'd try to establish a more open communication with the teacher - I don't think she's trying not to communicate, don't get me wrong. But I would try a daily notebook that you write messages to each other, or request that she respond to your emails, or make a daily phone call or something along those lines that is more regular. I love the recommendation for karate or other more physical activities. Cooperative sports or karate can teach self control and responsibility to others - these are great lessons for anyone, not just an "athlete". Try to spend a little "special" time with him - take him swimming or for a bike ride/walk or whatever he likes to do - kids seem to open up more when they're relaxed and engaged with you in an activity. Hang in there - you're doing a great job!

You should be able to call the school and get an answer. if the teacher is not responding to your email i would ask to set up a meeting with the dean and teacher and set up a clear way for your to get weekly reports on your sons behavior in class- daily reports would be better if you can get them. then you and the teacher can work together to get the behavior of your son under control. If he is finishing his work early is the class too easy? sometimes very bright children get frustrated with school if it doesn't challenge them and this causes them to act up....( I think you need to be a little more aggressive with the school, emailing is just too passive you don't even know if has been read yet. )