I'm helping with a shower for a mom who's going to be adopting. Has anyone been to one or been given one? Were there any special things done outside of a regular baby shower that made it a more memorable experience? Anything unique or special wording on the invitation? Thanks!
Thanks so much to everyone for their responses. There are some great ideas for me to think about and see if I can incorporate into the shower. I completely agree that an adoptive mom is a mom like everyone else. I just wanted to do something extra special first, 'cause this is for my sister, and second, because this has been such a horrible ride filled with heartache and disappointment. Finally she is getting the break she deserves!
I have a friend who just adopted a 9 yr old. Each member of the party was instructed on the invite to bring a silk gerber daisy. They took the flowers and made it into an arrangement for the girl to keep.
I gave a shower for my cousin who adopted a 6 month old little girl. On the invitations, I put "You are invited to a baby shower for the newly adopted daughter of....." Then I put the baby's sizes on the invitation and you could register at different stores for the shower if you like.
We adopted our daughter from China. The shower was just like any other shower. Our friends asked us when we wanted the shower, and we opted for the time after we received our referral (things were more certain then) but before we traveled. Because of that, they were able to put the referral picture of the baby on the invitation. Too cute! Also, people had a better idea of what size clothes to buy. Otherwise, you might get little baby clothes and be referred an 18-month-old.
Each adoption is different, and the mother-to-be will probably have a preference for having the shower before or afterward, so the best thing to do is to ask her. Other than that, making it the same as any other baby shower would be the best thing to do.
http://rarebirdfinds.typepad.com/rare_bird_finds/unique_b...
This site has lots of cool baby stuff. They also have a shirt that says Adopting--- baby bump not required. I thought it was cute. I am sure if you scroll threw there were more onesies that I remember about being adopted.
A new baby is a gift. Many of her friends already no of this occasion and should be aware of the event. So a shower as a baby shower is great. The fact that she did not carry this child is no matter. The child is hers. Have a great time at the shower.
I gave a shower for a friend who adopted from China last year. The wording was something like:
"Boy Oh Boy
Jump for Joy
_____ and _____ are adopting a boy!"
We just treated the shower as the same as if she were pregnant. The only difference was the size of clothing that she was given since the baby was a little older than a newborn.
Have fun!
I attended a baby shower for a very close personal friend that was adopting, and it was same as a regular baby shower. A word of caution though, her adoption fell through at the very last minute and she was left with all of this baby stuff (some of it monogrammed) and no baby. You may want to have the shower after the baby is in her home.
I went to one... it was after the child had arrived and she was between two and three......was a lot of fun because she was from China and was so excited about everything she received... she wanted to stop right then and change into each outfit.... She was the whole entertainment... no real shower games. It was held at a restaurant.. and prior to the gifts we had a buy your own meal... and ate... We brought in a cake that said Welcome Home Lily.
J.
I am the mother of 3 adopted children. I agree with waiting to have the shower after the baby is here and reliquishment papers are signed. Our relatives gave us a shower after our little girl was born and it was great because everyone got to meet the baby and there were no worries about the birthmother changing her mind.
There is a catch 22 here-when will the adoption be final? Until the adoption is final there are things that can-and often go wrong and delay the final adoption. My co-workers threw us an adoption shower and two weeks later it looked as if he might not ever be "our boy". After 14 long and painful months we were able to finalize. I would double check to make sure of the status of the adoption, and if things are close to final-treat it just like any other baby shower. We had a couples shower and then I was given a shower from work. A new mom is a new mom and I'm sure she would appreciate any and all gifts. Share her excitement and joy!
I know this is late and you may have already had the shower. On Mother's Day I gave my sister a shower; she is adopting two children from Guatemala. I had already been to Guatemala to meet them, so I had pictures and picked up some party favors when I was there. Then I had a Guatemalan style baby shower. I wanted everyone to see some things from Guatemala and also to give the party a theme that was specific to them. I made my own invitations with beautiful paper and a scenery picture of Guatemala that I had taken on the front. I had the party catered by a mexican food restaurant and decorated with fiesta type decorations that I bought downtown. I also had handmade bookmarks from Guatemala for everyone who came and a thank you card that I had made from the same paper as the invitations, but this time with a picture of the kids. It was a really cool party and special just to her situation. She is living in Guatemala now because she could not be away from them anymore - I get the heartache thing big time. With any luck she will be home with them in the next month. I hope your sister's journey is coming to end also. Good luck.
How about everyone write a short message to the baby telling how special his/her M.( and dad) are.
A baby shower is a baby shower, it;s what you make it. An adopted baby needs the exact same things a baby of natural birth needs. Just be sure that all guests know it's adopted, but since you'll only be inviting friends, they should already know. If the age and sex is known, indicate it. The prospective mother should be registered at various stores just like any other mother-to-be.
Hi. That is really nice of you to throw a shower for you friend.
I have adopted all of three of my kids.
I did not want a shower prior to the adoptions, because adoptions sometimes do not go through. Depending on your friend's situation that maybe her thought too.
There are adoption memory books and lifebooks that are really nice. A journal would also be nice. If someone sews, the participants could all write on a quilt square a message for the child and a quilt could be made.
L.
I agree about waiting- definitely try to wait until after she has the baby because you never know it could fall through and having all that baby stuff could make an awful time even worse. I have some friends that adopted and the shower was after the baby and it was cool because we got to meet the baby too! Other than that, I would say it was pretty much like any other shower I've been too.
Hey J.-
Candace Hargett has a neat thing that's been framed. It's a little poem about God choosing this mother to be his/her mommy. I want to come!
Love-M.
My friends threw me a shower just before we adopted our twin boys. What made it special for me was that they did not treat it as if it were any different than a shower for a biological mother-to-be.
We adopted our daughter and had 2 showers thrown for us that were identical to all others. The only difference was that we had the shower after we brought her home! This was awesome as everyone got to see her:)
