Hello Moms! Let me start by saying that we have a beautiful almost 7 year old daughter that came to our family by the way of adoption so we are familiar with the whole process but... We would really like to adopt again and were thinking that we would really be intrested in adopting a toddler. We went through an awesome agency when adopting our daughter (at 6 weeks). I am not sure where to start where a toddler is concerned. We are thinking toddler because of the age difference. I am sure you guys have some wonderful advice. Thanks so much in advance! V.
We adopted a little girl almost 2 years old Internationally - Russia. A lot of international adoptions are struggling right now, but that is another option for you.
We used Hope International Adoption Agency located in Dallas. Website: Hopeadoption.org They are Fabulous!
Good Luck!!
Just be prepared to possibly have some problems for awhile. A toddler may of been in afoster home or several, had issues with real parents and then been taken away etc. All these are pretty tramatic for a little one, and you just need to know what you may be getting into. It is espically hard if they have been in a lot of different places, with a bonding issue. I wish you the best, I just think all will go better if you go into it with your eyes open.
We have been in the same situation. We want to adopt a toddler too. The most certain way is throught the Texas Dept of Family Services foster-to-adopt program. However, they make that very difficult to get into. Before you spend a lot of time on it, make sure you find out all the things that might disqualify you. We spent a lot of time on phone calls and researching how to get involved. We were prepared to jump through all kinds of ridiculous hoops. We were ready to finally begin the long process of getting approved when we found out, "Oh, by the way...you will have to get rid of your trampoline." Well, this is our son's favorite toy and we had just gotten it for him the previous month for his birthday. We are not prepared to make him sacrifice because we want another child. When he gets old enough to understand, then he can decide. I tried all kinds of compromises, we would put it behind a locked fence, we would be responsible for any medical expenses related to an accident on it, etc. But no, if we have a trampoline on our property we are not allowed to foster. We can have guns, pornography, sex toys, prescription medications, but no trampoline. And these things I have listed are things they volunteered to tell us are not restricted before they knew about the trampoline, we didn't ask about any of those. So, sorry about my rant. But the point is, that seems to be the "best" way to ensure adopting a toddler. But it is very difficult. I have also tried private adoption. There are several Yahoo groups that are geared toward infomation about this. These are great reasources. I have had two different situations that have come to me through that route. But you have to be careful of scams. Some are obvious, others are not. These sites help you learn how to find out. Unfortunately neither one of our scenarios have worked out yet. Both are still "pending" but unsure. Be prepared to be patient. And good luck, it can be done, it just takes time. Feel free to contact me if I can help. I may or may not be able to answer your questions but I would be happy to try.
V.,
You have gotten many replies with good advice. I just wanted to add that we, too, are in the process of adopting a toddler, who is part of a sibling group that we chose as well, through txdps...foster care system. It has pros and cons just as adopting through any other resources such as international adoption or domestic private agencies.
In response to B R's negative comments, txdps offers an informational meeting where you can find out everything before you have to "jump through hoops" as she stated. We went to one, asked many, many questions and were able to talk with several agencies who were present that you can go through that answered additional questions as well. That way you know (before you have to strike out on your own making calls) if it is going to be a fit for you and your husband to go through in order to adopt a child. Go to their website (I believe another poster may have given you the exact site) and look up when their next meeting is or use the contact button and inquire. It really is helpful to find out this information before you sign up to go through the foster/adopt licensing classes.
Two good things is....the costs financially is very very small if anything to adopt through the foster system and like another poster said, you are giving so much to a child who has so little. Also, if you have a good agency, they can be a TREMENDOUS source of help and support as is ours.
If you have any questions please feel free to contact me and I would be more than happy to share our experience with you.
B.
try www.pathway.org that is the agency we are using to foster to adopt. They are great!
Try this local company in Dallas.
My advice is to adpt through the State. Department of Family and Protective Services. I would go through them because there are so many abused children available at the toddle age, and as tddler they are still young enough that youcan remold them. I kow that with other children in the home you may wory about bringing an abused of neglected child in for safety reasons, but a toddler is yung enough that they should not be exhibiting any real serious problem behaviors that canno be orrected. In additio, there are a lot of children that have no problems whatsoever.
HEllo V.,
I wanted to let you know that we adopted our 3 year old last month and we went with a foster agency as we are also foster parents. I think that the process would be much the same. There is a web site that might help txdfps.org This will infrom you of all the steps. Good Luck to you and your family. God Bless.
Hi V.,
I highly recommend Christian Homes of Abilene in Abilene, Texas. They have a web site that you can go to and see a lot of information about the agency. We adopted both of our daughters from Christian Homes of Abilene.
I hope you are able to adopt as soon as possible!
R.
V.,
My husband and I are going through the exact same thing. We have a 5 year old son and did not want an infant. We stated through the Foster to Adopt program (Adoption only) however we were told if we wanted a child less than 6 we would have to Foster first and neither one of us thought we were strong enough to parent a child for 12-18 months and then have to give it back if the state ruled that way. I give immense credit to the people that can but I know emotionally I cannot handle that. We chose international adoption. We did a lot of research and chose a reputable agency that deals extensivly in the country we chose. If you want additional information I would be happy to share. Good Luck!
We have seven biological children and have adopted three through the foster care system. We are foster parents. One of our adopted children was two and a half when she came to live with us, and four when we adopted her. I've written a lot of articles on foster adoption. Here's the link to my page, you'll have to scroll down and find the articles that interest you, as I've written on other subjects, too. But people tell me I give an accurate view of how it feels, and what's involved. One article called "The feelings of an adoptee: Angel-Leah's grief" people tell me is especially helpful.
http://www.associatedcontent.com/user/150807/carla_raley....
