ADD In 10 Year Old Boy

Don't be so quick to medicate. Drugs are not always the answer. Sometimes a healthy diet makes a huge difference or exercise. Does he have problems focusing when he is on the computer or doing electronic stuff? If not, then it is probably not that he can't focus but that he doesn't want to. I'd look into what you can teach him to help him focus on the things that he is not interested in.

First I would find out if the work is too boring or too beneath him. If he isn't challenged then why should he do the work?
Also ADD shows up before 5th grade. I have two with ADD/ADHD. I do not medicate.
My son was on Ritalin for a while, then Adderal and Chlonidine but then I took him off all meds, he became a zombie. It was awful.
My daughter is not medicated, I homeschool her. She is not hyper just beyond spacey.
Is he involved in any sports? That might help, he needs to have an outlet for his body. Also exercise may help him concentrate better.
Can you get him involved in Boy Scouts I guess Cub Scouts since he is in 5th. Although you might want to wait unitl he is in 6th and join a BOy Scout Troop. By now the 5th grade boys are finishing their last requirements for graduating to BOy Scouts.
Help him stay organized and get him involved in things he really likes.

with our son, we found that using behavior modification helped him immensely! We were able to avoid drugs & it made all of our lives easier. I found it fascinating that we often had to educate his teachers as to "how" to refocus/redirect his attention. We learned these skills from the school counselor.

By using simple methods, such as simply tapping on his desk, the teacher was able to redirect him. For at home & at school, holding your hand up (as a stop sign) helps draw the child's attention to the fact that they are not focusing......or are in the process of interrupting you. A finger snap will do the same.

Throughout our son's school years, we have been very aware of how this affects his learning abilities. Some years are harder than others....it depends on both the teacher & where he is developmentally. We have found that hormones & growth spurts affect him periodically thru the year.

Our son has the ability to be an A student, but because he is unable to focus (as needed) - his grades come in at A/B....with an occasional C on the report card. For daily work, the range is A-F! Some days are good, some days are bad. We deem this perfectly acceptable ....because WE are the ones chosing not to medicate him......therefore NOT giving him the means to achieve/succeed.

Our decision process began when we noticed that children of friends/family who were medicated had distinct personality changes when on meds. While it was not all bad (!! man, some of the kids were wild without meds!!), we did notice a definite tendency toward Zombieland. These same parents were choosing not to medicate their children thru the summer months....for that very reason.

For us, it became a simple choice.....what's more important: "A" grades or a happy kid. It was easy for us, because our son is not an extreme case. He is actively learning, he is happy & thriving. At any point, if we see that he is not learning/not retaining......then we will readdress the situation. He is now 14 & we will see what happens next year in H.S. (fyi: we waited until he was 6 to start KG due to the ADD.)

Now that my story is complete, here's my thoughts for you. Have the school counselor address this. It worked for us. She simply met with our son a few times, sat in on his class a few times.....& then gave all of us helpful hints as to "how" to make his life easier. This instruction followed our son thru the grades & made a night/day difference in his life. He did not have an IEP....it simply was not necessary. Good Luck!

EDIT: read your addition. Yes, with ADD, the child is usually laid-back. That's part of the equation. For homework issues, I found that having my son complete his work in front of me (while I read or did paperwork) really helped us train him into focusing better. Other times, I would set the timer & request that he complete the work within the designated timeframe. There was always a reward for this.....video game, special book, fav treat, etc......if he achieved success. After a while, rewards were not needed.

& one more thought: our niece appeared to have ADD, but instead it was a learning disability manifesting thru audio disruption. Her brain was processing only 2/3 of what she was hearing.....& by using a headphone setup, she learned to focus & not miss that 3rd word. BUT the whole process seriously affected her entire pysche & she required counseling to get thru it. She is now 17, moody like all teens, & takes meds thru the school year & not the summer. She usually weighs 10lbs less thru the school year, which she loves.....but seriously prefers the summers when she's not medicated. Peace!

Hey Daisy!

He sounds like a classic ADHD inattentive type. Many kids do not have the hyperactivity, and you will get lots of responses from people who have missinformation and odd ideas about what ADHD is and isn't, but just tune all that out. What is commonly called ADD, is really one form of ADHD without the H, the diagnosis is the same for each with a secondary typing.

I am an educational advocate for kids with special needs, so I see a lot of children who have the same issues as your son, and there are several things that jump out at me in your post.

First and foremost, I would have a very serious discussion with your husband about brain disfunctions and illnesses. They are organic, flesh and blood issues that are not character defects, they are fully biological issues that cause issues that are no different than those that he might have with his ablity to make and dispose of pee properly. That is a biological process that we understand, and we don't withold medical treatment when urinating is the issue. Men are very logical for the most part, so I find that many respond to this explanation of ADHD: Brian cells do not touch. Between each one is a tiny space called a synapes. When we think, our thoughts are carried in the form of electrical impulses, and when the impulse reaches the synapes, our bodies make electrochemicals called neurotransmitters. The neurotrasmitters carry the thought to the next cell. This happens hundres of millions of times a second. When a person does not make enough neurotransmitter, or has damaged nerutransmitter receptors, they have ADHD and cannot rely on their thoughts to continue to be carried from start to fininsh. Does that explain why he day dreams and loses track, loses things, forgets what you just told him, even though he knows the concequences of doing all those things? He can't help it. We can't think our way into making the molecular process work any better without help sometimes.

Medications help the thought process continue. There are many different types and varieties, and one will help his particular issue. I have met hundreds of ADHD kids and helped their parents access appropriate educational serivices, and I have never met a single zombie. Personalities don't change, and these medications are safe and effective, and for some people, they are medically necessary, just as they would be if we were talking about pee. Side effects happen, but they happen will all medications, and that is why you need a good, board certified child psychiatrst who will work closely with you for medical management. There are many regular pediatricians taking this on, and it is just not the best thing for anyone.

Get a full neurpsycholgical evaluation. Your insurance may cover this, but pay for it if they don't. You need to see how he processes information so that you can advocate appropriately. The teacher actually did something that gives you some leverage. She suggested that she suspects that your son has a disablity. Depending on what she said, and espeically if she uttered the words ADD or ADHD, or suggested that you have him evaluated, she obligated the school district to evaluate him by raising her suspecion and pointing it out to you. Now, the school may refuses, because they do not see a "need" however, you can push for this, because she brought it up. Children do not need to fail to get serivices, and it is likely that he may only need accomodations avialable in a 504 plan, but you need to be ready to pull that trigger so that he does not lose any more ground.

Get the private evaluation to keep the school honest, and ask for what he needs. Get what you can from the school, and supplement with private services. Expect to provide more of his treatment plan than the school does.

His treatment should include a combination of: Speech and OT (if needed) Cognative Behavioral therapy, social skills classes, medical intervention and mangaement, and educational and behavioral interventions. No child should just take a pill. While theraputic services may be appropriate for some children without medical intervention, medical intervention without theraputic services is never appropriate. Many people have the outlandish idea that parents take kids to the pediatrician for a sore throat, and at the end of the visit, Mom complains that junior has a problem sitting still, and the doctor pulls out his script pad and writes one for a medication that will zone out the kid into a zombie oblivion so that Mom can sit on the couch and not provided dicipline...it is NOTHING like that. That is a myth of the most distructive proportions. Any parent who accepts a medication without a full evaluation from either a Developmental Pediatrician or a psychiatrist/neuropsychologist evaluation combination and gives them that med without theraputic intervention is not getting quality care. Don't let this prevalant popular myth keep you from helping your son get treatment that will keep this very smart, creative, sensitive, boy on track.

I cannot stress enough how successful standard medical care, theraputic and educational interventions can be for a high functioning child like yours. I see it all the time, and I see something else too...parents who were taken by the whole de-tox, diet, supplement, fringe care movement coming back to standard care after the placebo effect of these unproven treatments wore off. Their kids were furthere behind, had more secondary issues, and just don't do as well in the long run as children whose parents find standard care and stick with it. There are many people out there who mean well, and will give you all kinds of fantastic stories about how they fixed the problem. I really wish that that were true, but it isn't. You have to be very careful, standard treatment is expensive, and you need to use every penny you have on what will work in the long haul, so don't waste your money on quick fixes. There are no quick fixes, slow and steady wins this race, and standard care is not flashy nor does it present any foe for you to defeat (like toxins, food, allergins...the list goes on) you may never have a villan to throw darts at, but he can get better and be successful and happy, and so can you.

Get your husband on board. Get some books by Dr. Mel Levine (All Kinds Of Minds) is a very good primer. Many other books by Levine will be helpful, you can find them at big stores and on line. Dr. Russel Barkely is another wonderful resource, he explains medical issues and gives wonderful options for effective strategy and support for kids with ADHD.

Remember, first step first...get the evaluation from a nueropsychologist, take it to a psychiatrst, ask for referals to therapists and social skills classes as needed, explore medical intervention if this is recomended, medical intervention is only a tool that will help all the expensive therapy work better, request that the school evaluate, and get what you can from them, then provide everything else yourself so that he is maximized.

M.

It sure sounds like ADHD-inattentive type. Martha has given you excellent information below, so please read her comments carefully.

My husband was against medication, too. However, our son's issues became so severe and behavioral therapy alone couldn't help him. The best thing I can advise you to do is make sure your husband goes to all of the appointments. Have him bring up his specific concerns about medication with the psychiatrist. The more he can talk it out with an expert (and not base his thoughts on the misinformation in the general public out there), the more reassured he's going to be that this is the right step. Have him write down his concerns before going to the meetings so he's sure to get everything answered.

ETA: Another reassurance for your husband: ADHD medications are in the system for a limited number of hours. So, if on day one, he hates anything about the medication, it's out of your son's system by the end of the day, so you can stop that medication and try a different one the next day. You call the shots.

Our son has ADHD-combined (with the hyperactivity) and I can tell you from our experience that medication can be totally transforming. Our son couldn't focus on anything in school and now he's doing fantastic. The only side effect we saw was a decrease in appetite during the day at the beginning but that gradually went away. Now, I'd say there's zero side effects -- 100 percent positive. I even wrote a letter to the makers of Ritalin to thank them for helping our son, it was that impressive how much it helped him.

You son can't will this condition away. Professional help is going to make such a difference. Make the leap of faith and get the medical assistance he needs.

This is just a little advice from someone who has been thru this. Remind your husband that he is not the one sitting in class and struggling. Try the medication on a trial basis and see what your son says. If he notices a difference then that is the answer, if not, then move on to something else. Medication will not label him, but obviously he is being set up for failure everyday something is not done.

Good luck,
DH

I really like this book: "Healing the New Childhood Epidemics: Autism, ADHD, Asthma, and Allergies: The Groundbreaking Program for the 4-A Disorders" by Kenneth Bock, MD and Cameron Stauth.

Your library may have it. Dr. Bock has some good discussion in there about ADD and ADHD. If I remember correctly, he's not completely against meds, either - he just goes at the problem from an integrative standpoint, i.e., to discern the underlying cause of a problem rather than solely treat the symptoms.

You may also want to research and check with qualified professionals about whether ADD meds stunt growth. That would be a concern for me. I am not saying they do or do not - it's just a question I would ask.

I am not a health care professional of any type - this is just my "mom" opinion.

Good luck to your son - he sounds like a great kid.

Medication worked for me as a kid and now is working for my 2nd grade son. I figure, right now school can be a little easy at times but it is only going to get harder so why not help them anyway you can.

I would talk to your son's pediatrician. I actually just had a checkup for my son yesterday and as the pediatrician and I were talking about the difference between the way girls and boys learn, he mentioned a lot of times teachers or parents think boys have ADD/ADHD when really they don't. The learning style in school is more left brain and boys are mainly right brain so they get bored and become known as a bad kid. I'm not totally against medication, I think it is right for some kids, my niece being one of them but from what you've mentioned, it doesn't sound like he needs it. But definitely make an appointment to speak with your pediatrician, he/she will know best. Good luck!

You need an evaluation by a pediatric psychiatrist or psychologist. We saw our family doctor first, and he recommended someone to evaluate my son. It was the best thing we ever did for him. He went from barely passing to straight As and Bs in a matter of months because of the medication. He's had NO side effects from his meds (he's definitely not a Zombie, in fact he taught himself to read Japanese in 10 days, recently).
It's not fair to your son to say "We won't medicate him no matter what". That's like saying "We'll try. but we're not willing to try everything to help him." We put off trying medication until my son was separated from a really good school b/c of his attention issues, and then we knew we had to have him evaluated. No one should refuse medication for a medical/neurological condition if taking it will improve their quality of life.

However, those teachers are WAY out of bounds to suggest medication, that's totally illegal for them to do so. They should have suggested an evaluation by the school psychologist, and you should request one. They are in no position to diagnose him. And neither are you, you need to get an unbiased objective view of what is going on with him before you decide on any treatment plan. ADD/ADHD is a very REAL neurological condition. Sometimes changing their diet or learning environment, or involving them in more physical activity, will help, but you won't know what your choices are until you have him tested.

edited to add
My son takes Strattera.

my son has this and was diagnosed with AHDH, Inattentive. So far it has not affected his grades, I have found be sure to give him time in the morning to run around outside, even for 15 minutes and then after school. I have mixed feelings on medication, but think it can work wonders in certain situations. I would never do it just because a teacher recommends it. Be sure he gets plenty of fresh air and exercise, I know it sounds silly but it really does work.

There are benefits to having ADHD too, they make excellent surgeons and pilots because they can really focus in like a laser when its needed, if its something they really aren't interested in they can lose interest which may be what the teachers are seeing

My dad has actually done a lot of research on ADD, ADHD, OCD and several others. He has found that these are related to a lack of vitamin B6 in the brain. Your son doesn't sound as though he is an extreme case. Before you start medicating try purchasing a bottle of B6. They now make it in a chewable for kids bc of these findings. Someone who is not ADD receives enough B6 through the foods they eat whereas your son needs possible double the amount of a regular person. My youngest brother was an extreme case which is the reason my father began his research. To give you an idea of the difference this one vitamin can make: my brother had ADHD and OCD and when medication would ware off he would have an extreme violent outburst for sometimes hours then go into a comma state sometimes up to several hours. When he began taking the vitamin my dad figured out the amount he needed and got to the point where on weekends and during the summer that was all my brother took and you'd never know he had either disorder. It's been found that children who have these disorders normally have a very high IQ and some medications keep them from advancing at a level they should. Your son is just having trouble keeping his brain focused in class. Try the vitamin before you put him on medication. If it doesn't work then you've ruled it out and take the next step.

Read up on the website....www.adhdchildparenting.com. I have ADD. I remember losing interest, not catching directions and then panicking when all of the kids started working on something and I realized I wasn't listening to what the teacher was saying. It's so frustrating!!! I still struggle with drifting off mid conversation (as an adult). I hate it. I now have a child who I think has ADHD. Have him checked for food sensitivities first. Careful with these western medicine doctors; many of them think if it's not a full blown allergy, it's fine for them to eat it. That's not true. Secondly, see a doctor who deals with ADD/ADHD and get information on what supplements to give them. Also have him tested for vitamin deficiencies too. Omega 3's, B vitamins, and protein in the diet are huge. I'm about to try the ADHD diet on my child. It sounds hard!!! Ugh, I'm not going to lie. I'm going to tough it out though and see if anything changes. Throw yourself into this! Learn as much as you can and try everything else first! However, just know....even with me having ADD, I've grown up to be very successful because my mom taught me the importance of education. Even though I hated school and thought I was stupid, I did it anyway (and graduated college) because I didn't realize I had an option to quit. He may struggle a little but it sounds like he's pretty bright to begin with. Let him have a lot of breaks. It helps to focus after regrouping and telling himself in his head that he needs to force himself to concentrate for the next 10-20 minutes.

I haven't read other responses, so maybe someone's offered this advice already, but ... Our son has ADD and is 10. We first discovered this by having the school counselor give his teacher and us a questionnaire. I don't recall the name, but ask your school counselor. Based on our results and the teacher's, it was determined that he had ADD. He sounds similar to your son. He is very inattentive and distractible, but not especially hyper. We took him to the pediatrician and he prescribed medication. We feel like it's unfair to him to not medicate him, because then he's expected to do things (like pay attention) that he's constitutionally unable to do easily. We didn't want him to be handicapped in that way. Good luck to you!

I would have him evaluated and get a diagnosis before resorting to medication. He might be ADD or it could be something else. He could even be gifted and be bored with the curriculum. Also, many things are not always about medication or no medication - there are other therapies to consider before resorting to meds, and your husband may need to be more open-minded if medication is truly indicated. Please have him evaluated by a specialist first. I doubt a pediatrician is going to prescribe anything anyway without a confirmed diagnosis first. As a kid, I had many of the same traits and looking back I wonder if I had ADD but it was not as recognized then as it is today. But I still did fine in school as long as I applied myself and did not allow myself to get distracted.

Daisy,

I am a therapist and also have a 6 y.o son that sounds a lot like yours. You don't say what you have already tried in terms of behavioural management. I would suggest getting a really good book on ADD (Russell Barkley or another respected expert) and trying some of the non-medication therapies with your husband's support (and your son's!) If you try all the professionally recommended options and see no improvement, your husband is likely to be more convinced and you will know you tried other things.

I have found quick, positive reinforcement to work well. The challenge is working with the teacher as some don't want to make the effort to use behavioural methods - they just want the kids "fixed." Others have great ideas for helping kids focus on subjects they aren't into. I have seen some kids do better with dietary changes and exercise, but not all. Most good books on ADD will discuss this.

Best of luck,
S.

I would talk to your pediatrician and see what they say. My sister is ADHD and an all natural diet helped her control herself a lot better. We cut out artificial colors, flavors and natural sugars called salicilates (found in grapes and apples and some other foods). This diet worked wonders!

It sounds like your son has extreme focus problems and may need some assistance with medication. Maybe if you and your husband go talk to the pediatrician together and then get a referral for a child psychiatrist (they prescribe medication) to get an evaluation, then go from there.

Before medicating definitely have him evaluated by a child psychiatrist as they will know the proper dosage and right medication along with the newest research regarding children's mental health. Technically ADD is a learning disability. No we don't want to automatically medicate our children we want to weigh all options, but in some cases the meds are necessary and they really help. Once he is able to control his focus, his self esteem will get better, his grades will get better and he will feel better about himself.

Good luck!

I would do everything possible to not medicate him. Read all you can about how the things he eats affect his ability to focus, how it's possible to teach him skills to make it easier for him to focus and stay on task, and how organization and structure will help him too.

Also is it possible your son is bored? Kids who are advanced are often bored with their school work and show the signs you've mentioned for your son. Maybe he just needs more advanced work that will keep his interest.

Another possibility is that your son has a medical condition other than ADD. Years ago my son was diagnosed with ADD, but it was the wrong diagnosis. He was having small seizures every time he lost focus or seemed to be day dreaming. The pediatric neurologist told me that kids who take ADD medicatios but don't need them can have permanent brain damage, sometimes severe, because ADD meds target the brain. I'm not saying that scare you, just make you aware there may be something else happening.

has he showed symptoms before now? My oldest has shown symptoms for awhile and tested in the high risk group but we didnt have the need to medicate because it was not interfering with his school work until this year. So we are reevaluating again at the school then I have to bring those results to his pediatrician and then from there we get an appointment when the specialist comes in to their office. The school cannot diagnosis and they definately cannot tell you to medicate. You could have them do the evaluation though. The forms that the school used are the same that are our pediatrician's adhd packet.

Try the ADHDdiet.com. We have my my 3 AdHd boys on it and it is working well for us. It is not hard to implement and a MUCH healthier way to eat for the whole family.

It also sounds like your son is bored. Ask the teacher to ramp up the challenge.

Good Luck

I agree with D.H. Try it and see if it works. If your child is ADD the medication will make his life better and he will be more successful. If he is not, the medication will not help. I have seen it work miracles on kids and make them so successful.