9 Year Old Hates Reading

As long as she's a competent reader - reads at grade level and understands what she reads - don't push it. All you will do is make her hate it more.

I have one of each - my oldest loves to read, and my youngest dislikes it. I spoke with my SIL, who is a master teacher and specializes in children's reading and writing skill development. She said that kids should be reading books where they can easily read 19 out of every 20 words - if they're trying to read books that are too challenging, reading isn't fun for them. However, if kids' reading skill lags behind their interest level, it can also be a problem (because a smart 9 year old isn't interested in the Magic Treehouse or whatever). That's where we were having trouble; my youngest is a very smart kid, but just hasn't shown a whole lot of interest in reading, so what she's interested in vs. what she CAN read are two totally different things.

What my SIL reminded me was that ANY reading counts. Some kids don't like fiction. Fine, let them read magazines. Or how-to books. Or the back of a cereal box. Whatever they read, it doesn't really matter. The point (she told me) is that they are reading something. Apparently there's some magic number of total words read that will launch kids into being competent readers, and at that point, reading becomes easy for them.

I know that this did happen with my oldest - at some point she went from being a reluctant reader to a voracious reader. It's taking longer with my youngest, but since we started allowing her to read in different ways (online, manuals, magazines), she has started reading without us asking her to do so.

Anyway, just some thoughts for you!

I could have written this myself! I absolutely love reading, and wish my daughter would want to read as well- she doesn't. Great reader, good scores, just doesn't love it. She is now 13. I never forced it because as you said, I don't want her to hate it. Her schools have always required about 20 mins per night of reading, so she does need to do it. What drives me crazy is that if people mention a book that she has read, she'll talk about and say how good it was- just doesn't motivate her to read more!

I will also say that I've tried to make it as cozy and enjoyable as possible. In the winter, I'll make some hot chocolate or something and suggest we read at the same time- me with my book and her with her's, all snuggled under blankets. This was there's a treat attached and she also sees me reading. This has helped. Could do the same with lemonade or something for the summer.

I didn't love reading when I was in high school, but love it now. So don't force it and hopefully she'll come around. But make the reading experience as fun as you can for her right now so she has a positive association. Good luck!

You know, reading fits with a certain personality type. Readers tend to be more contemplative than active, more introverted than extroverted, more cerebral than physical, more linear than 3-d in their thinking, and (obviously) more verbal than visual/mathematic/musical/kinesthetic/etc. Not that there aren't readers who don't fit this mold, but this is overarching statistical pattern.

And, the world needs the other types of people. It needs vibrant, dynamic, busy social butterflies. It needs budding engineers who take everything apart to see how it works. It needs athletes and rock stars and ... you get the idea. Believe me, there aren't enough jobs out there for us editor/librarian/English major types as it is.

So, after all that, my advice to you is to sort of split the difference. Keep encouraging reading, but not with the expectation that she'll love it. Do it with the expectation that she'll start to hate it less. And encourage reading that suits other personality types -- how-to manuals; social, gossipy stuff with lots of dialogue; texts with a lot of action and adventure and not so much lyrical description -- whatever sounds like a match for *her.* Whatever you try, though, if you do it with slightly lower expectations, that may take the pressure off, and you may get better results.

Some kids will never be readers, no matter what you do.

Just keep reading to her at night. It's a good bonding experience, and will give her the language skills she needs. I read to my kids until they were well into their teens. One day they were all just too old, and the reading stopped. :*(

None of my kids are the type of avid reader I was at their ages, but they have acquired the necessary language skills through exposure.

Read to you child as often and as long as she will allow you. I don't think forced reading is the answer.

I am a book lover. I've been a reader since I was a kid. When I read, especially fiction, I SEE what's going on. It's a movie in my head. I thought this was how EVERYONE experienced reading, but it's not.
I remember doing the summer reading contest at the local library where we lived. When I die, you'd probably have to pry a book from my cold, dead hands (LOL).

That said - you don't want her to hate reading so don't MAKE her read. She will have to read for school, so she will read. Keep reading to her - sit next to her so she can "read along" if she likes. Reading at home should be recreation unless it's homework. If she doesn't love it, she doesn't love it.

You can encourage reading by having books on subjects that she loves available to her. And if you have an ipad, there is a reading rainbow app - it costs $60/year, but there is unlimited access to online books of all different subjects. Graphic novels may also be useful to get her reading what she likes. Kids like comic books. They don't think they're "reading" comic books, but they are. Go the path of least resistance. But don't make her resent reading.

I'll venture to say that she hasn't found the right book series. Who is picking the books? You or her?

If you just "back off" and let her do what she wants, she will end up being a mediocre high school student and may not be interested in going to college. Others may disagree with me, but I really think that "backing off" is the wrong thing to do. High school is HARD. Kids need to read, no matter what.

If I were you, I would have her tested to try to figure out WHY she is fighting you so hard over this. Yes, yes, I know that sometimes personalities are why kids don't want to do things. But sometimes it's more than that. If you don't have her tested, how will you know??

And if it's a power struggle between you two, then this is an attitude thing. Instead of giving in to her, find a way to win her over, away from "the dark side". Get her in the library and let her read genres that you normally wouldn't pick out. What about the graphic novel? (Comic books.) Manga? Harry Potter? Are there movies that she likes that are in book form? Fan fiction? Silly girls' magazines about teenage idols?

You DO need to require her to read. What you need to first do is make her identify what she likes to read and then work through that to get her used to doing it. I promise you that if she doesn't read at home, she's not going to read at school and her grades will show it. So will her SAT and all her school testings leading up to it.

I have one of each. You can't really force it but try introducing books that focus on her interest. With my child who has an aversion for books I use very short stories. She has autism and ADHD. She does pick things up quick including reading and math but interest wise..big fat zero. There are times that I had to negotiate.

Try these...
-Compile a book list (make it a short list at first maybe 5 books)
-Pick a series. If she likes the book, she may seek out others from the same series.
-Try an interactive book. There are interactive historical books that puts the reader in the middle of the story and makes them choose the next adventure.
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/interactive-history-adven...

There are also fictional ones.
http://www.amazon.com/s/?ie=UTF8&keywords=choose+your...

-Get her excited about local authors.
-Expose her to history. Mine learned about Box Brown and spiraled into reading about the underground railroad, Harriet Tubman then into other women in history including Anne Frank, Rosa Parks, Marie Curie, etc
**Watch "The Story of Us". It's a fun historical watch about the USA
-Reading Class (not necessary remedial) but it does build an interest or maybe a book club.
-Writing Class. Even if she is not reading a lot. It introduces different types of genres and may peak her interest in reading.

My son didn't like reading until he discovered Captain Underpants, Diary of a Wimpy Kid, and Arthur's Reading race.

My 6y LOVES the book Mooseltoe, and No More Baths.

In my opinion, some kids are natural readers while others need to be encouraged at early age. To instill the habit/joy of reading, and show her how fun/interesting is reading, you may consider these:
Be a good role model yourself (I know that for many people is a very difficult task, they just don't like it, but think that is beneficial for the kids)). Set aside just 15 min for "reading time", the same way you set aside more than hour to watch TV or the same time your kid play WII, watch TV, which are some of the factors kids do not like to read. Make an habit of it, it will take time and patience, but it works. Do not force it, just do it casually, show your enthusiasm while you read a book, a magazine, share with her something you found interesting,etc.
Expose your child to those things she likes and find amusing, such as visiting a museum, a zoo, and pay attention to her when she tells you something she likes a lot, ask her:"would you like to find out more about this?, "would you like to pick up a book about______when we get home?, or "I know a great book that shows _____!", things like that..... I always do this with my children, and works wonders!
Keep reading to your child and go together to the library OFTEN. Let her choose the books she likes, talk about them, share information, ideas and always show your enthusiasm!
Keep books around the house even in the bathroom on a little basket for everyone!
Organize a small library. A nice and interesting project!
N., just do not make this a chore, make this a fun moment at home. Do not show disappointment, instead show her how fun it is reading. Make books "from scratch", pick up covers from old books and glue pages with interesting articles. or just staple them together, etc. That is fun for some kids. Try it.
I hope this helps a bit!

A. :)

“To add a library to a house is to give that house a soul" (Cicero)

With my kids, they get to extend their bed time but only if they are reading. I have them pick some books for their room - either from our collection or from the library and they can stay up an extra 30 minutes (longer on the weekends), but only if they are reading or journaling or something like this. I peek in on them to make sure they are not playing other things.

If they don't want to spend this time reading - no problem. Then it's lights out. All of a sudden reading is wonderful!

Well at my kids' school, even in Kindergarten, the kids are required... to read daily. And log it in various ways.
The length of time a kid needs to read, daily, varies per age/grade.
In the upper grades, the child also had to, write a synopsis of what they read.

My daughter is not a bookworm either. BUT if it is a book SHE likes, then she will sit there and read and read.
She knows, what kind of books she likes. So that is half the problem solved.
And my daughter also likes to read on her Nook HD, which was given to her for Christmas by a relative.

Not all people are bookworms.
But per school and homework etc., reading is necessary and required.
So your daughter will have to learn, that such is life. Doing things even if it is not really something you want to do.

My son hates to read. As a baby and toddler, he would literally scream and cry if you tried to read to him! He was a reluctant reader all through school. Not sure he ever read the books that were assigned but he faked it well. He recently graduated college and the last two years he was actually reading (and not hating it so much).

My daughter is 6 and LOVES to read...above grade level. However, when she's being lazy or decides it's not what she wants to do right now, suddenly she acts like she doesn't know how.

As long as she can read at or above level and understands it, try not to push her too much. You could make a rule (for all kids in your home) at least half an hour reading when there is otherwise no homework, 15 minutes if there is homework.

You've gotten lots of suggestions and perspectives.

I'll throw my 2 cents out here:
Try graphic novels. They have tons of pictures with some dialogue and text. My nephew hated reading until he found some graphic novels that he liked. Magazines and comic books also count--don't just focus on "regular" books. If she likes acting, have her read a play. My friend and I love Anne of Green Gables as kids, and found the script and acted some parts of it out. That was a neat/interesting experience.

Do keep reading with her, and also have her try writing her own stories, maybe dictating to you or having you type. If she does a lot of imaginative play, you could write down some of her stories and type them up for her, maybe with her drawing some illustrations.

Also, give her some incentives, like a trip to get a sundae if she reads X books beyond her school assigned ones. Or, some other special thing or activity as an incentive--but make sure you and she both know you'l expect her to tell you something about the book so she can't cheat. :)

Find an interest and incorporate reading. My DD loves music. I print out the lyrics to the songs.
I have her help me read too. I have her look things up on the computer for me while I am in the middle of dishes and tell her to read me interesting facts. Then we talk about it to see if she understands what she read. It makes her feel special.

You could tell her at bed time that lights must be out at 9:00 or she can stay up and read until 9:30.

I was a kid that hated to read... Then a new girl came to my school in 7th grade and told me if I hated to read it was because I was reading the wrong books. She introduced me to some of her favorites and I have loved reading ever since.

You could get her magazines just to get her to read something. I also like the Chicken Soup for the Kid's Soul books. They are short stories that may not be as intimidating as a big chapter book.

If her test scores are good in that area or it's not effecting her school work don't argue with her. Continue to encourage her to read. If you find a good book she might like then check it out of the library, see if she can get interested in it.

My friend had a boy she had to corner/trap every night and force him to hold a book in front of his face. She was an avid reader so she could not fathom "her" child did not love to read.

He loved the Percy Jackson movie, she tried a different book of the series and he read it in one day. So she went to the book store and got him another one. He is a reader today but again, it's all youth style books like Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, and some hound dog book series.

My son did not like reading for a long time. I tried to set a good example by reading myself. We made weekly trips to the library. We eventually got him his own library card and I let him pick out books that he likes. That helped. Another thing that my son likes is to read comic book type books -- i.e. Garfield and even the Wimpy Kid books. I think he was overwhelmed looking at all the words on the page. It breaks it up when there are a lot of fun pictures to look at and they still have to read the dialog. Reward systems are good too. Good luck!

Often it's a matter of finding a subject that's irresistible to them.
With our son we found books about sharks, firetrucks, and dinosaurs.
Then he moved on to wizards and dragons.
He's always loved Dr Seuss books.
By the 3rd grade he was reading the Harry Potter books on his own.
Even when he could read on his own, he still liked being read to.
I read to him regularly till he went to middle school (and if I had a sore throat, he would read out loud to me).
If a book came out that we were waiting for, reading it out loud meant we could both enjoy it at the same time.
Show her this is something you enjoy and value - keep reading to/with her.
Science fiction / fantasy are his favorites but he doesn't mind a mystery every once in awhile.
It could be your daughter just hasn't found her reading niche yet.
Subjects you might try with her:
horses/ponies/unicorns
Nancy Drew
Anne of Green Gables
Harry Potter
Charlie Bone
joke books
fairy tales
age appropriate ghost stories
fables
Bible stories
The Littles
Stuart Little
there are so many choices to pick from!
It is true that some kids never take to it no matter what you do.
But you don't know if she's one of them until you go through many many subjects and it can take years to try them all.

My youngest didn't like to read. I simply made him do it. Now, I find him reading more and more. It grows on them.

Just make it a consistent requirement like brushing her teeth or laying her school clothes out for the next day....it's just what she does before bed.

I have a good, but reluctant, reader.

I let him pick books about what he loves--hobbies, interests, sports, etc., even if they're adult level reading materials. Those things he'll read.
Until now (elem school) it's been about "learning to read," now in middle school, the focus will be "reading to learn."
I'm interested how this will transpire in my house.
He'll rarely choose to read, yet he's conscientious about homework, so should be an interesting mix!

I am a reader and I read everyday and, when the kids were little I read to them everyday. I talk about books and we go to book stores and buy books. We go to the library a lot. Both of my daughters' read a lot on their own (ages 11 and 14). I've always believed they like to read because I love to read and it was part of how we live. Some people have sports, we have books. But it may be coincidence, I really don't know.

I would ask her what it is about reading she doesn't like. Perhaps she is struggling with some words and needs help or hasn't found a book that's of interest to her. My younger sister struggled with reading when she was younger in part because she was a slow reader and got impatient and was reading books that weren't of big interest to her. When I had to babysit, I told my sisters that at a certain time, the tv would be off and we would all read on our own for about 45 minutes and I'd set a timer. At that time, they each got a book and so did I and we each found our own comfortable spot to read in. Most of the time, when the timer dinged, they said they wanted to keep reading.

I love to read, get lost in a new book. My husband Hates to read a book, he will however read up on a project that he wants to do.. like replace the thermostate in our camper.

Books are just one way to read. There are magazines, news papers etc.. Books on tape as well. I love to listen to one in the car while I am in traffic.

You say more when you say nothing at all. Do you read? Unless it is homework, I would not force the issue. Off oportunities..

I understand where your coming from. One book to read (and I'm not 100% sure of the title) PARENTS WHO LOVE TO READ: CHILDREN WHO DON'T. It is written by an English teacher of over 20 years

My son got to the point that he absolutely hated to read, which is a major problem since we home school. I really got to talk to him and found out that he hated the stories in his reading comp. book. So, I shut the book, took him to the library and check out a couple of the DIARY OF A WIMPY KID books. The first night I let him read in his room for 20 mins after he went to bed. I told him he needed to put the book down and get to bed. Another 20 mins I told him again to put the book down and get to bed. I checked on him again, he had turned off his light, got my book light and had read almost half of the book. Now, my book light doesn't work any more because he has used up the batteries.

I don't think that forcing her will help at all, in fact it may make her hate it even more. I think that making an incentive chart would be the best. We get involved in reading programs during the summer from the library and during the school year we sign up for Pizza Hut Book It program. https://www.bookitprogram.com/

I hope this helps.

Okay, forcing her to read will just make her dislike it more. Back off for awhile.

I know a lot of schools require that they read a certain amount of time, so if that's the case enforce that, but leave it at that.

I personally hate that rule; it makes reading a chore instead of a pleasure, relaxing and fun experience. I love LOVE to read, but wouldn't like it if had been forced upon me.

Anyway, as long as she doesn't have delays or problems with reading, I wouldn't worry about it. My mom jokes about how my aunt never liked to read growing up and how she never saw her read, but now she reads all the time. She has book clubs meetings, book swaps everything. I think for some people it just takes longer.

Have you asked her why she doesn't like to read? Maybe she doesn't like the genre you or other people are picking for her. Maybe she would prefer non-fiction? I read both. I will read a book on a certain event in history and will be just as engrossed in it as I would fiction. I've always been that way.

Think about what interests her in movies and find books along that same line. Try different authors within a specific genre, their writing styles vary vastly.

Again don't force it, it may happen later.

Good Luck!

I have a few suggestions:

Try making it a LOT more fun. What is her passion? Art? Get her a magazine on art projects. You would be surprised how much reading will be done.

Don't push her or make it homework, that is unless she really does have reading homework OR is behind others her age and reading level. Sounds to me like she is a strong reader (when she chooses), so I wouldn't be too worried.

KEEP READING TO HER! That is the best way to continue to peak her interest in books. Don't stop reading to her and keep picking age appropriate, even if in a few years you are reading to her still. It will help.

Find funny or very interesting pictures, jokes or ideas in a book and just point them out to her and have a laughing moment. That little exposure every now and again will help, and it will keep her intrigued.

My husband HATES to read. Has never read an entire book in his life. He is a successful attorney (yes, he was FORCED to read in lawschool and it was torture for him) and a great reader. He just hates doing it.

I wouldn't worry too much, unless she falls behind. But I really don't think you should worry at this point at all. Keep it in your discussions, but don't punish or force. Who gets excited about chores?! No kid I know! So if you make reading a chore, that is exactly what it will become. It is supposed to be fun!

I am a reading specialist. In our district students K-5 are required to read independently 60 minutes a day (30 at school and 30 at home). By the end of 2nd grade students have the goal of reading one chapter book per week. We focus on the books being "fast, fun, and easy" and the books are always child selected. This summer with my own daughter (going into 1st grade) we haven't pushed her to read independently every day, but we read to her 20 or more minutes almost every day. (I just finished reading a Magic Tree House book to her beginning to ensign one sitting.)

Try letting her choose what she wants to read--graphic novels, magazines, blogs, newspapers, favorite picture books-- whatever appeals to her. Don't force her to read something she doesn't want to read.

The reading doesn't always have to be in big chunks. She can read for short bursts of time throughout the day.

She probably just needs to find the right book and then she will be hooked. Try reading short books in a series. Read the first one to her. Read the second one together (taking turns reading out loud.) Then encourage her to read the next one on her own.

Watch a movie that has been adapted from a book and then read the book together.

Set a fun goal for her. If you finish reading this book by the end of the week we can go/do/buy----. Find a reward that really appeals to her. (I wouldn't do this too often. You want her to read for the fun and enjoyment of reading, not for what she can get if she reads.)

Keep reading to her. It's OK to read books that are a couple of years beyond what she can read herself. That will help to build her vocabulary.

For most kids, once they find them "perfect" book they take off with their reading. Not all of them turn into avid readers, but they will at least read for enjoyment.

Maybe it's the kind of book. What does she like? Frogs, princesses, dirt, butterflies?

Dealing With Dragons is a great series for girls. So is Pratchett's Tiffany Aching series (start with Wee Free Men). If she is a reluctant reader, maybe meet her with different material. Does she like snakes? Pick out a book on snakes and ask her about them. Make it less of a chore and more of an adventure. Read with her. Maybe read part of a book and ask her to take a turn reading to you.

You might also go back and make sure she doesn't have an undiagnosed version of dyslexia. My friend's DD was tough to diagnose. Her form is that the spaces disappear, so all the words run together. For a beginning reader to not know where a word ends, that was hard. But her eyesight is fine.

I would let her read what she likes. I didnt care for reading either when i was in school, but now i love to read! Especially true crime books! I obviously wouldnt suggest true crime books for a 9 year old but find out what is age appropriate for her and let her read what interests her! you will have tremendous luck!