I am a single mother of a 5 yr old son and a 7 yr old daughter. When my daughter was born my current boyfriend who is also the father of my son adopted my daughter and gave her his last name. As the years went on me and him grew apart and are no longer together. This past year he has been throwing in my face that she is not his real daughter and he no longer wants to take care of her. He has a girlfriend who is having a child by him and him and her both think that he shouldn't take care of my daughter anymore because it is not his blood child. I need some advice on telling her the truth about who her dad is and who her birth father is so she wont get hurt by all of this. Is she old enough to understand? And how do i go about telling her the truth? I need some insight on this situation please.
I truly am sorry for your situation. My opinion is the same as previously stated, consult with a dr / child psychologist and handle it together. Best of everything!
How sad. Your poor daughter. I really don't know what to say other than I think regardless of when you tell her the truth, which you should someday, she is going to need a lot of phycological support. Get help from the school psychologist.
A.
First of all, your ex IS responsible for your daughter and HIS daughter. Blood related or not, he accepted that lifetime responsibility when he signed the adoption papers.
Unfortunatly your bad decissions are going to cause a lot of confusion for your children. Your daughter is already hurt, there's no preventing it now. This is not something you casually explain to a child. Your children and you are going to need some counseling, get some now before any more damage is done.
MEN!!!! Tell this fool, that HE IS very much responsible for your daughter and will always be whether they are blood or not, and whether he likes it or not. HE made the decision when HE signed the adoption papers. Tell him to be a man and simply because he now has new interests and the old don't suit him, he can't just decide he doesn't want to do it anymore. Tell him you'll see him in court should he keep up with the nonsense. He signed a legal document that says he is responsible for your daughter. Garnish his wages, do what you must, because he is very much responsible. As for your daughter, perhaps you should consult a child therapist before you talk to her. She is 7 and very impressionable. Good Luck!
First, he is still her father whether he wants to be or not. And since he adopted her you could totally take him to court about child support for her. If you adopt a child from another country even though their not your blood your still responsible for that child. He adopted your daughter, and blood or not he's still her father.
Second, does she have any idea that he is not her biological father. I would explain to her that there is another man that is her biological father and let her ask the questions. This way you won't give her any information that she's not prepared for.
Third, I would remind this loser that blood does not make a father, and that he was at one time raising this girl as his own. And now that he has someone else of interest that does not by any means he has the right to just ignore this girl who he was raising as his daughter. Let him know that if he continues to give you any problems you will see him in court.
