5 Year Old Son Biting Nails and Sometimes Shirt

He just might have a cavity. Take him to a pediatric dentist. They are the professionals for this age group. A regular family dentist is okay but a pediatric dentist specifically studies baby teeth up through adult teeth.

You are on the right track to be taking him to an OT. Good call. Let the OT guide you. This is typical for some kids and does not necessarily mean he also will have food texture sensitivities, tag sensitivities, etc. But it is something for the OT to look at thoroughly.

If your son just turned five, is he in preschool? Not in kindergarten yet, right? You are smart to look at this now, because when he reaches "big kid school" in K, you might -- with a lot of involvement from the OT and possibly your pediatrician -- need to ensure that the school doesn't view his chewing as a problem, if he's still chewing his shirts at that time. He might move up to chewing erasers on pencils or pencils themselves and you do not want that - too much risk of biting and swallowing an eraser or even splinters from wood pencils.

He might be like my friend's son, who simply focused and concentrated MUCH better if he was actively chewing. When he tried to do schoolwork without chewing, it was a struggle, and it was remarkable how much better he was at focusing when he chewed. The OT and doctor had to write formally to the school to discuss this and to ask that the boy be given an individual education plan (whatever the title is, wherever you are) that formally gives him permission to chew in class. Some kids use "chewies," special therapeutic items that are designed for kids to chew during class (some are like pencil toppers but unlike erasers they don't disintegrate and can't be swallowed, for example). These things are available online but (1) wait for the OT to discuss whether they're needed and (2) ensure that the use of them is clearly allowed, in writing, in any accommodation documents you and the school create. Some teachers are better than others at recognizing that these things are normal and just a matter of accommodating a kid during the period the kid is developing and needs this boost to focus. My friend's son moved on being allowed to chew gum in class and now doesn't need anything like that to focus, but it took several years overall.

I know your son is still very young so the whole thing of getting a written (and enforceable) accommodation from a school is not yet on the horizon, probably. But just be aware that if he reaches school and still has a need to chew, especially if the OT and you find that chewing makes a difference in his focus and calmness, you may need to be assertive and advocate for him so the school permits it within reason. It is doable, but not every school administrator or individual teacher is really aware that some kids do have a real need to chew for a time and are not just being difficult!

As for the touching -- sounds normal to me. He's barely past being four, so he might have some need just for simple reassurance and gets it with gently touching your or his dad. I would never discourage it but let him do it all he needs to; he won't do it forever, and should never be made to feel that it's "not what big boys do" etc. YOU won't say that, I'm sure! But some adults or even relatives might realize what he's doing and chide him for not being a "big boy" and wanting to hold hands. Watch for that, and nip it with anyone who does it. He needs it, it's harmless to others and helps him, and shouldn't be made a subject for others to discuss.

I'm glad you're taking him in for an OT evaluation. This really sounds very much like sensory. My son bit his nails something awful. The OT gave him a squishy play toy (it was a penguin) and told him to squish the penguin when he felt like biting his nails. He really tried too - his nails were bitten into the nail beds and bled. He hated it.

I really think that if you have them work with your son for a while, it will help. My son had intensive OT twice a week for 6 months, and then he was in a group class with an OT who specialize in teaching handwriting (Handwriting Without Tears course) which really helped him a huge amount. (He also had a weakness in his right hand, and this worked on that issue as well as teaching him to write - 2 birds with one stone kind of thing.) Between the six months of OT and the continuing work, he got a lot better with all of his issues (and there were many).

As far as your question of letting him grow out of it is concerned, please don't. The earlier you get him help, the better chance of fixing so many issues that you don't yet realize that are hard for him.

could be sensory seeking - needs lots of sensory input.
If he needs something to chew on or play with, check out stimtastic.co - they have cool stuff.

Hi OneofEach,

This is very typical, especially for boys of this age. I would pick my DS up from school and the front of his shirt would be soaked from him chewing on it. He has always been very tactile and emotionally intense. I believe this was a coping technique he used, especially at school, to modulate his experience in his environment.

Unless your son is doing actual damage to himself or others, I would just let this run it's course while he grows and learns some different coping strategies. It wouldn't hurt to have his doctor check him out but in my experience, your son should grow out of this. Also, I would sit him down and have a calm and supportive conversation about it with him. See if he has any insight into why he's doing this and maybe discuss some alternatives, like a worry stone in his pocket or some other object he can focus on, rather than chew on, to manage himself when he feels overwhelmed.

Cast yourself back and remember being 5 is really hard...school, activities, tons of kids, all sorts of grown ups towering over you, lots of hurry up and wait, environments and expectations that can be difficult to predict, I could go on. Keep on loving him unconditionally and communicating with him and you all will move through this phase and into the next.

Assuming this is a legit question...get his blood checked. Specifically iron levels. If you are anemic you can crave strange non food items such as paper, dirt, ice, paint, etc. Good luck.

Oh I hope its not a worry-some deal. Cuz if it is I should have checked into it when all 3 of my kids were little. I think my kids turned out fine. 😉

One of my sons is a chewer. If we're just sitting down watching a t.v. show, he'll find some piece of plastic, or it could be the sleeve or his shirt, and chew. It's kind of an oral fixation. It started out small (and he's a nail biter) but progressed in school to chewing pencils, all sorts of things. Other people don't notice, such as teachers, but I am aware.

Mine has other things as well - for a short while, he had something that resembled a tic with his face (eye and mouth). That came in school too.

He also had allergies and eczema on his face, so we never knew really if he had fluid in his ears he was trying to clear with the facial expressions, or what. Eventually it passed - as tics tend to do.

My son never appeared anxious.

The wanting to touch you or your husband thing may just be a comfort thing. Another little one of mine has a bit of anxiety and would do the same. She's not a nail biter or biter in general, but she had other little tendencies that brought her comfort. She just finished an anxiety program through the school and we've seen a big reduction in her little habits.

I think a pediatrician or even a child psychologist could help if you have concerns. We see an OT for one of my kid's printing difficulties. I'm sure they could at least give you an idea of who you should see if they think it's a concern.

I do know a lot of kids have habits like this. My nephew actually bit his toenails (I know, ...) and outgrew it. He was kind of a nervous kid. But outgrew it.

My son used to do this same thing at that age! He does have sensory issues...most of which he outgrew. He outgrew the chewing thing. It was very annoying how he would ruin his shirt...we had many talks about it! I did get him a special pencil topper that he could chew if he wanted to. Besides that he just outgrew this behavior. He did not do the hand-holding/touching thing your son is doing though. Just remember...he's just a little guy. Give him lots of love! Maybe at some point you will want him to talk to a therapist if he seems to have too much anxiety, but I would not worry too much about it yet.

I've bitten my nails off and on my whole life, and I'm almost 48 :-(
It's mild anxiety, nothing to seriously worry about, and very, very hard to change.

I agree with the first poster on here. Both of my sons did this and we found out their iron levels were low. Once a day flintstones vitamins WITH IRON, and no more nail biting or chewing on non food items. We actually had them tested for pica at first. They would chew on absolutely everything.

My younger used to bite holes in his shirts near his neckline. He outgrew it eventually, when he was 7/8. There was nothing wrong. No anxiety, no sensory issues. He just liked to do it and it became a habit.

My advice is to buy cheap and second hand clothing until he quits. Do keep reminding him to not bite his clothing, but don't stress out overmuch.

As for the nails, I don't know. Nailbiting isn't super uncommon in kids, but trying to bite your nails is rather odd.