I have a 5 month old who has started waking every night about 4 hours after we put her to sleep out of what i believe is habit. Here is what happens: she wakes up and if I pick her up, give her the binky and rock a bit she goes back to sleep for about 45min- 1 hour, then she is up again and i get her back to sleep but once i put her down she gets very upset. So i offer the bottle and she eats maybe 3 ounces. Then back to sleep on her own. I know she can sleep longer than 4 hours at night, she has done this in the past and she eats alot in the last 2 hours before bed, plus she doesn't even eat a full bottle when she wakes. Anyone else experience this?? What to do??
Thanks!!
Maybe she's teething! Try giving her tylenol and two teething tablets before bed then maybe even again when/if she wakes (if it's the appropriate time--i think 4 hous for tylenol?)
Good luck!
AND what Lisa D and Vaina C said. Right on girls!
I agree with Chris, as we went through the same thing with our daughter around 4 months with her starting to waking up frequently (she was sleeping at least 5 hours before). Per our doctor we did the whole "cry it out" and he said it would go on for about 3 days before she would go to sleep without crying, which I must say worked! Being that I'm breastfeeding I would get up to feed her through the night because I thought that's what she needed, I didn't know any better being a first time mom. The doctor said that she could sleep through the night without feedings. He said if I offered her something to eat that naturally she would nurse, but doing so was only conditioning her to have to feed when she didn't need to. She has been sleeping 10-11 hours ever since...also, the doctor had me start her on cereal at 4 months old being that she was ready. I don't know if that made a difference with her sleeping or not, but good luck! ;-)
Hmmmm....have you tried giving her some cereal before she goes to bed? Might fill up her little tummy and make her sleep longer. Is she even eating cereal yet?
You could also try comforting her the second time, but not picking her up...maybe after a few "check-in's" she will put herself back to sleep. Soft nite light, soft music might help. I always left soft music on for my son at night. Couldn't hurt! Good luck to you!
You are absolutely correct about her waking out of habit; she needs to learn how to fall back to sleep, on her own. The more you go in there and rock her or whatever to calm her down, the more she is going to rely on you to help her fall back asleep. Everybody wakes up periodically at night; most people fall back asleep on their own......babies need to learn this behavior as well and learn that they don't need someone (or something) to help them fall asleep.
We had 4 children within the space of 3 years, and when they were babies we taught them this early; they can calm themselves down and fall asleep on their own. We didn't have the luxury (nor did we want to) of coddling them to sleep every time they woke up.....not that we never went in there if they woke up screaming; either my husband or I would assess the situation before we went into the room; if the screaming was all out, like had a bad dream or was really scared, we would go in there and talk calmly, like a whisper to the child. Figure out what they need; if it is a dirty diaper then obviously change it......if they are just scared, DO NOT pick them up out of the crib; talk soothingly, rub their back, and tell them it is OK, now go back to sleep. If they keep doing it, to see if you come running, every hour, then have the time between their cries and you entering the room get longer each time. You will find that eventually, they will get comfortable on their own and fall asleep by themselves. This is what you want; they need to calm themselves down, and not rely on you to do this for them. Let them know that you will always be there in the house, but once you put them to bed at night (and make sure they fall asleep on their own initially), then you will see them in the morning; we all need to be quiet and get our sleep at night.
Obviously, once they get to a certain age, they don't need to be eating at all hours of the night.....offering the bottle or the binky is a crutch people use to try to get the child to stop making noise and go back to sleep. What they really need to learn is the skill of falling asleep on their own. I don't mean to sound like a mean parent, but this is a learned skill and we as parents need to teach it to our children, in a loving way. Once you do, it makes your life so much easier!! Hope this helps-
P.D.
My husband and I went in and rocked our son or went downstairs to watch TV around the same time. By 14 months, we were exhausted. Nights were miserable and naps became longer. We were stuck in a situation that we created. I suggest, and only suggest, that you think about your future sleep and sanity. We parents need them. They are valuable when babies become toddlers and are hard to get back after we give them up unknowingly. Good luck and you are doing a great job!
Hi K.,
Between 4-6 months, babies become much more aware of their environments. This often causes they to wake up during the night when they used to be good sleepers. They probably always woke up, but now when they wake up, they realize they are alone and want comfort. It is pretty common and it does pass. The best thing you can do is to comfort your baby when this happens so that he/she gains self confidence. Eventually he will start sleeping through the night again.
Also, he could be teething or going through a growth spurt - all of which could lead to waking at night.
J.
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This sounds terrible but let her cry. It might take a little while but it works. My son, stopped after one night of it. Crying tires them out.
When she reaches 6 months old, she will be ready for the beginning of real food -- starting with rice cereal, and I recommend some mashed banana or something, too, cuz because babies often get constipated at the first introduction to food.
Until then, she really shouldn't be on solid food, but it stands to reason that as her body is getting ready to be developed enough for solid food, that she is also burning calories differently and may really be getting hungry at night. Just because she wasn't hungry enough to eat more than 3 ounces doesn't mean she didn't wake up because her body needed even just a little bit.
I know it feels like a pain in the butt, but being a mom of a 27, 24, 12 and 10, I promise you that these days will come to an end, and you will be amazed at how you thought it never would.
My advice? Hang in one more month, then start introducing baby cereal at bedtime.
She may be waking up because she is legitimately hungry .. sounds like a growth spurt. A 5 month old doesn't really have habits .. they have needs. I would let her have the bottle when she first wakes up .. and see if she then goes back to sleep for a longer period. My first child did not sleep longer than 2-4 hours her whole first year .. she was constantly hungry! I understand sleep deprivation. Infants, however, are not capable of manipulative behavior .. they learn that about the time they hit toddler-hood!! Good luck ..
I went thru the same thing with my son and at 6 months, against everything I said, we did the cry-it-out. It worked!!! He sleeps 11-12 hours nightly, has since 6 months (unless sick or teething). It is not for every one and it is NOT cruel. My son is so happy, healthy and is thriving well. Read up on it and go with what you think is best for you and your family. I was against this sort of thing and it did break my heart doing it, but after seeking advice from other moms and family, it really did work and we survived the crying the first 3 nights. The longest was 45 mins the first night (going in after 10 mins, then 15 mins etc....).
Good Luck!
It would help to know what time you put her down for the final sleep. At five months, it is not unusual to still be waking up once to eat at night, but you've observed that she's just nibbling. If she was previously sleeping well, sounds like something else might be going on -- gas, need for comfort. If it is just comfort, and you continue to pick her up, rock, and use binky, she is going to want that all the time to go to sleep, so be careful what you do, if you don't want to do that. If it's habit, as you suspect, my aunt gave me a good rule of thumb -- wait fifteen minutes before going in -- if there is still crying/fussing going on after fifteen minutes, then try to comfort her, etc. Sometimes, they can fall back to sleep on their own, and if you are immediately going in, you actually might be waking them up. Five months is still a bit young to expect them go sleep all night, but I've heard it happens.
How is she during the day? She could be teething, sometimes during the day they won't act bothered, because there is stuff to distract them, but they have a bad nap. Babies who are getting an ear infection do not like to be laid down, it hurts. It might explain why she will sleep for only 45 minutes before waking. If you are sure that she is not ill, then consider letting her fuss for the fifteen minutes. Every baby is different -- my little guy, if he wakes up full blown wailing, there is a problem. If he's just crying a bit and fussing a bit, he might not even be awake. You'll learn your baby through trial and error. Only way -- they can't tell you what is up!
Even though our socitey seems to want us to believe that we should be able to put our babies and children down to bed at night, and walahh! It is actually not an appropriate request at all. Babies are not developmentally ready to sleep on their own for long periods of time until well into their third year or after. It is a shame that doctors try to push this so much because it winds up making the parents crazy and thinking what is wrong with me or my child, when in reality, congratulations, it means your child is normal and healthy! You child has been born with innate survival skills, which require him to wake and request your prescence so that he doesn't feel so vulnerable to what may be lurking in the shadows of the forest. In my experience we always nursed and co slept. From the day, or night, my children were born, they slept through the night. They were by my side, felt my body, could nurse when they needed to, and I got tons of sleep! You mentioned that you are bottle feeding, but you could very much still co sleep. Many doctors slam the idea of co sleeping, but it is how virtually every other culture has done it for eons. I suggest researching the topic and listening to what our children are trying to tell us. They are only little for so long and they do decide that they do not want to be in your bed forever.
K.,
It is a normal, albeit frustrating, developmental stage to see a sleep regression around approximately 19 weeks of age. If you google "4 month sleep regression" you will get a more detailed description and explanation. but the gist of it is that our little ones are getting ready to start doing all sorts of new and challenging skills and they often start waking more frequently and eating during the night again during this time.
My DD is now 6.5 months old (5 months adjusted age as she was a 34 week premie) and she has gone from sleeping 8p-8a and waking only at 3 and 6 to waking 6+ times in the same period. It's been going on for a few weeks here so at this point, I'm thinking that a lot of it is becoming habit. It's rough to run on so little sleep at this point. Unfortunately, I have a sinking feeling that I'll get the sleep issues straightened out only to have everything fall apart when she hits the second big sleep regression at 9 months.
Taylor wakes up (cries) and doesn't settle back down. I go to her crib (at the foot of our bed, and I think part of the problem is we wake each other up) nurse her for about 5 minutes and she's out cold again, sometimes for an hour, sometimes for 3. I just keep telling myself that this will eventually pass.
S.
My eight mos old used to sleep thru the night. Like 10-12 hrs at a time. Since teething a few mos ago, he goes thru these spurts when he wakes up every 2-4 hrs. He is doing that now, second set of top incisors have broke thru. Let me tell ya, i really reaks havoc when ur used to sleeping thru the night urself. I am lookin forward to the night when he sleeps all night again. Ugh.
He will get up, drink a few oz. Then back to sleep. O , and during the day, he used to take a 2-4 hr nap, twice. Now.. I lay him down, and he wakes within the hour, screaming, only to fall back to sleep on my shoulder. I think he may be going thru separation anxiety now too. Aahhhh
this too shall pass, i pray.
Good luck and god bless
L.
My baby does that too. I would trick him in the middle of the night with just plain water in the bottle since he was wasting the bottle anyway. After about a week of that they decide that water is not worth getting up for and will sleep. Now I got mine to do that for about two days and then he started teething so we are back to getting up a couple times a night. Good luck.
K....
I feel your pain! My son just turned 5 months old and I experienced the same thing in the past few weeks. He had been sleeping up to 8 hours and then all the sudden it was every 3 or 4. Of course everything is trial and error...but I tried to let him just cry it out a few times. Sometimes it would work, sometimes he needed a bottle and then he would sleep. But when I let him cry it out, I did not even go in the room with him (because usually when I do that, he will cry even more if I don't pick him up.) I just would let him work it out on his own. Now, I'm pretty sure my son was waking mostly because he was hungry...I'm thinking he was having a growth spurt. But if your daughter isn't hungry, maybe she just needs to learn to go back to sleep on her own? The great thing about babies is that it only takes a few times for them to catch on to something! Good luck...I certainly understand what you are feeling!
As hard as it is for the parents, it sounds like she needs a good dose of sleep training. I used the book, "Healthy Sleep Habit, Happy Child." This book will guide you and give you the confidence that you are doing the right thing while your child is crying. At four months my son was doing the same thing and I found his sleeping to be worse than it was when he was even younger. A friend recommended this book to me. I started with his naps then by night 3 he slept 13 hours straight! I could hear him wake up and toss around his bed, but because he learned how to get himself back to sleep I did not have to go in and help him. There was no crying and no tired mommy by night three. He is now 22 months and he's sleeping 12 hours at night with a three hour nap in the afternoon. I have done mini sleep training sessions occasionally...perhaps when he was sick or we did some traveling...but it only takes one or two tries and he right back on track. Good luck!
It is a habit, so she'll learn to adjust if you ease off the picking her up at night etc, even though it may be hard at first. One important trick I learned as far as hunger during the night, you HAVE to feed her as much as possible all day long , not just a big last feeding. Once I did this, my daughter started sleeping through the night after three days of increasing her food all day long rather than just the beefy before-bed bottles I was giving her before. She never needed to eat at night again-she was about 7 months old at the time.
My oldest daughter started sleeping through the night at 6 weeks and has slept 10-12 hours a night ever since then. She's now 3 years old. My other daughter, however, started sleeping through the night at 5 weeks old and then started waking at night again around 4-5 months. At first I would feed her because I just wanted her to stop crying so I could get back to sleep. Then I decided to just let her cry it out. After a few nights, she was back to sleeping all night again. Now she's 9 months and she's waking again, but it's only because she's getting teeth in and she doesn't actually wake, just cries. So, I suggest you stop feeding her when she wakes. If you don't want to let her cry it out, just try rubbing her back or something. If you want to pick her up and she starts crying again when you put her down, I'd let her cry. When I do that with my 9 month old she stops after a couple minutes.
