4 Year Old's Cavity

Either shop around and find a dentist you're fully comfortable with (ask everyone you know who has kids!!), or just get the tooth pulled! Another one will come in its place!

I was an office manager in a dental practice for 6 years. My first thought to this was, are you SURE a crown is absolutely necessary???? Especially for a 4 year old. I know there are some cases where it may be needed, but overall it seems like some dentists are overeager to do a crown instead of a filling...because, guess what....it costs a LOT more! The dentist I worked for was very often able to do a filling instead of a crown when parents would come to him for a second opinion.

Here's my second thought, and you may not like this one. Some parents just make it absolutely impossible for a child to do well at the dentist. It is true that kids do SO much better when the parent is NOT in the room. I've seen it over and over again. I'm not sure what the reasoning is, but it's an absolute fact. Of course you want to be comfortable with the dentist and the assistant before you leave your child with them. But once you have that trust, it is best to stay out of the room and let them work.

My third thought. Either you are extremely unlucky and came across two pathetic, rude, heartless doctors, OR you are a difficult parent to work with. Sounds mean. I'm sorry, but again - I've seen them all. Usually the children that our dentist had to eventually refer to a pediatric dentist for sedation dentistry were children who had no manners, were terrified, could not sit still to save their lives, or such the like...and many times (not every time, but many) the parents were often the cause of these situations. There are some children that will have to be sedated - for their own safety during a procedure. But there are a lot of children who are able to get crown treatment (as a last resort) or fillings with local anesthesia with no problems whatsoever.

By the way, pain is never "good". That's ridiculous! Lol! Get referrals from friends or another doctor that you trust. Don't just go to the doctor that's in your insurance plan. A lot of people make that mistake. Once you know you are with a reputable doctor, then please, just trust him and let him do his work. The sooner you are able to do that, the sooner you can put all of this behind you. Then make sure your child is brushing and flossing - or you'll be right back here again before you know it.

First of all, in regards to the first dentist...what KIND of anesthesia? Local anesthesia, I am assuming. And when you say crown, do you mean a temporary cap until the permanent tooth comes in? Or are they going to drill the tooth down and put a crown? If there is a cavity there, it seems they should be using local anesthesia and then putting a cap on the tooth.
If not, go to another doc.

Regarding the second doctor....any doctor who gets angry or treats you in a condescending way, well....WALK OUT THE DOOR. Any respectful doctor will encourage sincere questions. The reason he became defensive is a RED FLAG. You are the patient....HE is there to SERVICE you. With respect to the dentist, make sure you are sincere with how you question the procedures. Don't accuse, just simply say you aren't familiar with these procedures and you have concerns as a parent.

If the dentist isn't accomodating, go elsewhere. I have no idea where you live but sometimes it is worth the drive to go to a bigger city and see a dentist with a reputable reputation.

I would find another dentist if you are not comfortable with him. Both of my boys see a great dentist, unfortunately for you we are in Memphis, but he makes them feel very comfortable. My 6 year old does great every time and when he got fillings last year, the dentist only gave him something to numb the area because he always lies still when they work in his mouth and doesn't fight them at all. However, he always warned me that if he ever had to work on my 4 year old, he would need to put him under. Which, after seeing how my son reacts, I totally agreed with. My 4 year old has to have his molars worked on in 2 weeks and will be put under just slightly and will have his mouth numbed. They are very thorough about explaining everything and let me know that my son will not be completely unconscious, just sleepy. The dentist wants him to be awake so that he can tell him if there is anything wrong and they can immediately bring him out of it. My dentist also encourages the parents of small kids to go back with them at every visit and I can sit outside of the room where they put in the cavaties and crowns and there is no door so I can see and hear everything going on. Kids don't know if what is happening to them is right or wrong so they need their parents with them. I would never see a dentist where I could not be with them...even if it's just for the moral support. Keep looking until you find someone you like.

Definitely do NOT see either dentist. ask your pediatrician for a reference. Are you aware of a female pediatric dentist? Is Louisville in your coverage area? What about La Grange or Prospect or Peewee Valley? I would NEVER use a doctor that I"m uncomfortable with. I interview and decide on my childrens' doctors BEFORE booking an appt so there is no cost to you. A good doctor has no problem answering questions and explaining procedures prior to doing. Good luck!

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Oh wow Never have a heard such oddity...Sorry my dear i think you got the 2 bad apples now out of your way.. do you have any friends or family that can refer you to a good dentist? One that they trust with their children?

Where do you live? We live here in Matthews, NC and have LOVED Dr. Scott Goodman, he was my dentist as a kid and now our kids dentist. Google him and if he is close by, check him out. Good luck!!

Try Dr Sandra Trice it is amazing with 3 and 4 yeard old children. ###-###-####

I will start here... if you are not comfortable with the doctor then don't use them!

Now, I have always taken my children to pediatic dentists and have had good and bad experiences. My oldest one did get a couple crowns done when he was 6 where I was not allowed to go back with my child. He was NOT put under for this procedure however, when the doc came out to speak with me he informed me that he "had to yell at my son and threaten him so that he would not move". I was very angry at this and even though my 4 yr old needed work as well I refused to allow this doc to work on my child. Unfortunately, I waited until we moved (military) to get him seen again which was another 8 mths and he had even more work that had to be done. He had to have oral surgery and was put under for this. He had no problems with anything except that he could not keep any food down for the rest of the day. I would totally recommend having them put under at such a young age so that they do not get so scared however, I believe they could use gas and would achieve the same affect.

I would keep looking into dentists until you feel comfortable... and I am totally with you on the second dentist... I wouldnt even go there!

Good luck and God Bless
A.

ok this is about my niece my kids have good teeth thank god but my niece had 6 of her front teeth pulled then she had something put in that fell out the next day she was put under and shes only 3 chocolte milk ruined her teeth always make your kids drink real milk not the chocolate if they want chocoate add the syrup not the premade stuff its nt good for them and goodluck

I take my kids (2, 4 & 5 yrs) to Small Smiles... not sure if there is one around you. They give the kids laughing gas & then numb where they will be working. They try to talk to the kids, let them know each step before they start it, and as long as your not expecting you are permitted to sit in the room during the work. My 4 & 5 yr olds just had fillings & caps done last month. If the kids move to much they will restrain them with a vest, but we didn't need to go that route. They have scheduled my 2 yr old at the local childrens' hospital to be put to sleep for his work... they don't like restraining because it scares the little ones so much. So, this is the best way for little ones so young... personally I'm freaking out about it. But I know the hospital and put my trust in their hands all the time.

I understand your concerns, and until you feel safe, you aren't going to let your child get worked on. So, keep looking for a dentist that you feel comfertable with.

See if you can find a pediatric dentist -- they're used to dealing with children, and will have a good "bedside manner". They'll also have toys in the waiting room, and probably TVs on the ceiling or otherwise visible so the kids can be distracted during procedures. Hopefully they also will have dropped the "Doctor as god" complex the other two seem to have had.

That said, my child had general when he had tooth-work done without a problem, but he needed more than one tooth done, and the dentist didn't want to drag the procedure out over numerous visits, nor to make my child fear and dread going to the dentist because every time he would go to the office he would be getting a crown on.

My daughter was 3 when she first had a cavity. Our pediatric dentist advised us she would need to be sedated and that I could not be present when they were working on her. I FREAKED out.

I immediately made a consultation with another dentist that I go to and they assured me it is standard and there are very good reasons for it. The pediatric dentist sees hundreds of children and they know what they are doing. I cried. I had never left my child alone with someone else. I did hours of research on crowns, alternative methods, sedation, etc. The stuff on the internet scared me.

It all ended well though, thankfully my husband is much more calm about these things than I am. He went with me, our daughter was sedated and we took her home afterward. No problems.

I totally understand how you feel, but try to remember the pediatric dentist is well qualified to perform this work (cavities are not complicated work), but they need to sedate for safety reasons because kids cannot sit still or may become frightened. The parent cannot be in the room because the child is not completely "out", they are still conscious and may become frightened if you are upset.

I would not go back to the one dentist that didn't have on gloves. You don't know where his hands have been. And there should never be any defensiveness with disclosing sterilation methods. Check with your insurance for other providers.

Do not take your son to a dentist with an attitude. The dentist we went to when I was a child was very unfriendly and without compassion. That has affected my own attitude toward dentists to the extent that I haven't cared for my children's teeth as I should have. Finding a dentist who likes children and knows how to make them feel comfortable. This is so, so important.

I'm not in Buckner otherwise I would recommend a dentist. Keep trying. Don't give these guys your business. You do not want to make the dentist a scary thing for your child. If you are working from an insurance list, drop into the offices if you can w/o an appt and just look around at the waiting room and ask questions. You can get the general vibe from that.

DON'T be BULLIED. There are a TON of dentists around.

Do not go back to either of these dr's, go see Dr. Elliot and Dr. Molina at Cary Pediatric Dentistry, no problem with questions, in the room for the procedure with my kids, and very easy to work with.

That sounds awful! I also highly recommend Drs. Elliott and Molina of Cary Pediatric. They are amazing! If you need any further info email me separately. Good luck!

I ran a periodontist's office for 10 years and while we rarely had children for patients, I have my own children (and now grandchildren) and took them to a Board Certified PEDODONTIST (specializes with extra years of schooling in working with children and children's dental issues). I totally disagree with whoever said to just pull the tooth. The thought that baby teeth have no purpose is absolutely wrong! (For that matter, whatever a patient of any age, even 80, can do to avoid pulling a tooth is the better route.) I can't respond to needing a crown but I, too, question whether or not it's necessary and would get a second opinion. Whoever is mean to you does not deserve your business -- find someone else who friends can recommend. I, too, would question the 2nd doctor's sterile procedures and not wearing gloves would certainly cause me to go elsewhere -- immediately!! (Yes, dentists are doctors, just not physicians -- big difference!) One bit of advice that might help you -- if you can ask the doctor questions in a way that does not put him/her on the defensive, you'll probably get farther. It's true that he/she performs a service for YOU, but you also went to him/her because he has had the education and experience to clinically do what needs to be done. If his "chairside manner" is lacking, that's a different matter -- go elsewhere!