4 Year Old Boy Tears up Everything Help

My son also does this, with a lot of enthusiasm. One day, he tore one of my favorite books from my own childhood, and I had had enough. So, I told him that tearing things is not acceptable, and that when you break something you have to fix it (in my current kindergarten where I teach, we have this unofficial rule of "you break it, you make it" - meaning, if you knock down a friend's block tower/break a toy/kick the sandcastle someone built, you help them make it again). I got some scotch tape and my son and I taped up the book, and he has not done it again. I'm sure he'll find other things to break in future, but the same rules will apply then, and we will work on fixing the broken items together. Taking care of things can be taught, even to very lively (and well-meaning) kids.

i totally think this is a boy thing! my 3 yo son is the same way, he'll be very deliberate about it too, it's not like he's just being careless, i really think he's examining things to see how they're put together, how they work, how this fits with that, etc. my son is very rambunctious and sunny all the time, he doesn't mean any harm by it, but i am having to constantly tell him to leave other peoples' things alone, put that back, etc lol. i think they're just happy, energetic, curious little boys! all i can tell you (i haven't found the magic combination that stops this) is that my son is allowed to do whatever he wants with his toys - and once it's broken it gets thrown away. however i put my foot down when it comes to other peoples' stuff, he shouldn't be touching, and if he breaks it he gets discipline. so far i'm not really seeing this sink in much...he is sorry and sad when he's in time out...and two days later he does the exact same thing. boys will be boys? maybe! we just have to keep plugging along and trying to guide them to be respectful, bless their hearts! good luck!

LOL! My 9 year old just took apart his toy motorcycle today and my first thought was boy does he remind me of his brother! My oldest son is 17 and started taking things apart when he was small and hasn't stopped! Now he just takes apart real cars and trucks!

Does it seem like he has a physical urge to tear things up? Or is he just rough? My second son just has a rough touch and doesn't mean to be destructive - I think that's just something they grow out of over time and after ruining some of their own favorite books and toys. If it's the first answer (urge to tear), I wonder if he's seeking the sensory input from tearing? (my first son had sensory integration disorder, so I always notice those types of things in other kids.) Does it help to give him things he is allowed to destroy? Give him his own box of kleenex or ream of paper, or buy books from the used bookstore and put them in a box for him to destroy.