21 Month Old Will Not Let Me Brush His Teeth

Get him one of the little electric ones with the cartoons. They only cost a few dollars at most grocery and drug stores. My son has used one for quite a while and loves it. I manage for a while with an "eee" and "aaa" game but then he takes over. I feel that with the movement of the brush he gets a bit cleaner even if he is doing the brushing himself. And, he's always excited to see the new one when the bristles wear out.

Oh yea, we brush in the tub not at the sink!

Hey Victoria,
I have a 20 month old daughter and I let her do her teeth first and I show her how to do them with my own teeth, but then when we are done (playing) I take the brush from her and I pull her head to my legs so the back of her is now leaning on my legs while Im standing holding her forehead with the other hand and I brush her teeth. She fights me, but I don't care because she gets over it in about 2 min and she still loves me in the end. She is starting to get better at doing it herself because my kids know I don't give in, so she knows this will continue untill she does them the right way. Hope this helped.

As others - I have one that throws a fit whenever it's teeth brushing time. So we distract him - got a toddler toothbrush that plays 2 minutes of Bob the Builder (I guess the required amount of brushing time)We found it at the dollar store. If that still doesn't work - my husband brushes while he's lying down on the changing table and I'm doing the last diaper of the day. Now that he can use the step up at the bathroom sink - he's better cos he makes faces at himself while we're brushing him. He's 2 3/4 and still just chews on the brush. Boys - they are so funny!

Wow! You have a lot of responses, and hope you find something useful. I saw a few in there, that won't like what I did, but it worked (still works) for us. I don't know exactly when my 4yo son started actually brushing his teeth, b/c we just let him progress naturally. He did as yours does, and just chomped on the tootbrush, and sucked on the toothpaste. But, now he demands to brush at least twice a day (partly to stall before bedtime). He just saw us do it, and wants to do everything that Daddy does.
J.

We do a few different things with my 2 year old. He doesn't like to let us brush his teeth either. We will take turns sometimes. My mom has him choose if he wants to do the eeees or the ahhh's (front teeth and sides with teeth shut or open mouth getting molars). He has a few tooth brushes with cool characters. The newest thing that really worked at least at first was a tooth brush that makes noise/plays music. It only sounds loud enough to hear if you are really scrubbing your teeth. Just chewing didn't work. So my son was forced to let me or my husband brush or he had to learn to brush harder to make the sound loud. One of these might work for you!

We bought a toddler "electric" toothbrush featuring Spiderman and it helped a lot. He doesn't mind getting his teeth brushed now.

What works for us is letting her brush her own teeth & then she lets mommy have a turn brushing her teeth. It gets the job done & also teaches sharing.

I've been wiping my 18month old daughter's teeth since the first one popped out. She's used to it, but still gives me a hard time every once in a while. I do let her chew on the toothbrush just to make her think she's brushing her teeth, but I'm not worried about it.

?Perhaps you can start with flossing. They seem to like to play with the floss the way mommy does. Then work your way to showing him how to brush.

You might want to talk to a doctor or occupational therapist to see if he might have some sensory issues. Kids with sensory issues may just need help to become less sensitive to the feel of the toothbruch.

Have you tried singing one of his favorite songs to him while you brush his teeth? This works well for our 22-month-old daughter. Also, I have used a children's electric toothbrush very lightly on her in the past, mostly because her speech therapist recommended it as therapy for developing greater muscle awareness in her mouth. Anyway, Fiona LOVES the electric brush. I think the vibration half mesmerizes her. The only trouble is that it is really too big to use in getting back to her molars, so I use it on her front teeth and then move onto the rear teeth with the regular brush. I use a very light touch with the electric brush, though, as I do not want to rub too hard.

Good luck.

I have the same problem with my 20 month old daughter. While she is chomping away on the toothbrush, I take another one (or often one of those finger sleeve brushes) and brush her teeth. Hope that helps!

Hi Victoria,

Get involved in a support group for mom's. Take some parenting classes to help you on your journey towards learning some discipline techniques.

Kids Priority One is an excellent resource.

www.kidspriorityone.org or ###-###-####

Hope this helps. D.

My son is really into Thomas the train, He will be 3 in July. They make a Thomas toothbrush that plays music (I think I found it a Target), anyway he loved it. So we made a deal. I let him brush is teeth in the morning and I brush his teeth before bed. We also use the oral B training toothpaste, and I let him pick out the kind that he wants. They also make that in Thomas as well.
I would take him to the store and let him pick out which toothbrush he wants, and the toothpaste (oral B makes 3 different flavors). I would either let him do it first and then say mommy's turn, or do something like we do. He does it in the morning and I do it before bed.

You may want to try making it into a game with him, like follow the leader or make something up. Have him mimic you or your husband. It worked for me. We also let our daughters pick out 'Big girl' toothpaste themselves and told them we had to make sure we brushed our teeth the way big girls do. We also showed them that they could paint their tongues different colors with their toothbrush and colored toothpaste. It helped with the bad breath which my youngest has. Then they received rewards only if they brushed their teeth properly, i.e. a dessert with lunch or a sticker or something small. It quickly became something they looked forward to. Good luck.

We did a sticker chart with my son and I always sang songs while brushing his teeth. I let him have a turn first, then it's my turn. I used an egg timer in the past to indicate his time and mine. You could try giving him a squishy stress ball or porcupine ball or some silly putty or something to keep his hands busy, or let him watch a couple of commercials or something if he's really antsy (that usually keeps kids still for a minute). My son really liked watching an old video I had about taking care of your teeth from Crest (I was a teacher). Maybe you could find something like that online. After my son saw that "show" (under 10 min), he was really excited about brushing.

You're not alone. This is a daily battle with my 18 month old. I let him do it himself first (and all he does is suck and chew on the brush.) Then I try. After trying a handful of tricks I usually resort to lying him down on the bed and brushing while he cries. I've even tried letting him watch his favorite show while I do it but he still throws a fit. I'm hoping eventually he'll get used to it. Good luck!

OMG lol...I have the same problem with my 15 month-old. He sucks his toothpaste and just chews on the brush. I've considered brushing his teeth RIGHT before he falls asleep or when he's asleep.

You could try letting him brush your teeth while you brush his, they like that for some reason, also you could try different flavors of toothpaste, the non fluoride kind of course. You could also try the new child sized electric toothbrushes, he might like those. Hope this helps, good luck.

Hi, Victoria, Some issues are non-negotiable - like car seats and teeth brushing! It is extremely important to keep your son's teeth clean, so good for you that you are working hard to figure this out! Obviously, we all want our family to have good breath, but keeping your son's teeth clean will prevent decay & protect the health of his future permanent teeth. A friend of mine used to have to kneel on her daughter's chest to brush her teeth! I would hold my girls in my arms and sing a song while I brushed. Maybe your son doesn't like toothpaste; give him a choice - toothpaste or no paste - it is the brushing that is the most important. Or, tie a favorite a.m. or p.m. activity to brushing, i.e. storytime follows brushing, or he gets a nickel in his piggy bank for letting you brush. An "egg timer" can be useful as well - 2 minutes may seem like an eternity to him, but if he can watch the sand going thru the "hourglass" while you brush, that may work. I hope these suggestions are helpful. Please contact me if you think I can be of further assitance. N. B. (former dental hygieist)

I feel your pain! But don't give up - it's very important that you establish this habit and don't give in. We still have issues with my 4 yo. I have tried nearly everything the other moms suggested. For us, it's a bag of tricks approach and we go with whatever works that day. The other things we've tried that I haven't seen from others are 1) having multiple brushes and letting the child chose which one to use each time, 2) brushes with blinking lights that indicate how long to brush, 3) fun cups for rinsing, and 4)we keep everything we need for brushing in bathrooms on different floors so it doesn't have to be so much of a stop what you are doing and go brush kind of thing. She can still watch TV from the downstairs BA while she brushes.

We didn't enforce the brushing as much as we should have with our older child. A combination of her having really "soft" teeth, two unusally shaped molars that trapped food, and a dentist who did a bad job on her fillings (didn't get all the decay out), led to her having to have 3 of the 4 baby teeth he worked on pulled. We have a new dentist now who we all love, but I can't tell you the pain I felt watching my daughter go through the extractions. They say we learn from our mistakes, so believe me, we do everything we can to keep the younger one from ever having to go through this. Learn from our mistake on this. Don't give up!

My daughter is 21 mos. as well and we are doing what we did with her big sister. We got her a separate toothbrush and her favorite animal (which at the time was Elmo). We had her take turns - she would brush Elmos "teeth" then we would take a turn on her teeth. This really helped and eliminated all the drama. Because she felt like she was doing something as well. Now with my 21 mos old a lot of times she wants to do brush her own teeth first which is fine and then I say it's mommy's turn. A lot of time she'll resist but as long as I give her lots of praise and don't take the toothbrush from her she willingly hands it over and lets me brush them. Just have patience and make it an enjoyable time otherwise it'll be hard everytime! ha. Good luck.

Let him do some of it himself. See if he'll let you 'take turns'. See if it helps for him to have a toothbrush to hold while you brush his teeth with another one.

I've had success with pretending to find bits of things in their teeth, that they ate that day.

Express to him that the dentist will be upset if his teeth are not brushed properly (or that the dentist will be happy if his teeth are brushed properly)

Keep trying. How about a reward chart?

Oh, and using funny voices or a puppet works wonders.

My daughter went through this a few different times. I said that she got to brush her teeth only after Mommy or Daddy did. I insisted on this and occasionally said "no story until" the grown-ups brushed.

When she was older, the dentist gave us a timer (the old fashinoned kind with sand in it, but I would think a kitchen timer would work just as well). She must brush for that long - Mommy gets half the time and then she does.

Funny faces always worked and making them copy sounds that get their mouths into funny shapes - eeee, ooo, ahhhh.

I also always sort of assumed the chewing helped clean the teeth. Try to get him to move the brush around and bite different parts - "be a tiger, arghhh, okay, now be a bunny chewing a carrot, etc."

Also brush his toungue to help with his breath - they tend to like that - just don't make him gag.

I went through the same thing with my daughter. Her pediatrician made the suggestion that I switch from a regular toothbrush to a battery powered, that way you can brush better in a shorter amount of time. My daughter didn't really take to it at first, so I went out and bought one for myself as well. Now we both use the battery powered toothbrushes together (she likes to try and brush my teeth, and in return she lets me brush hers). Hope this suggestion is helpful!

I let him brush his teeth all by himself in the morning with no help from me except maybe to help him put the toothpaste on. At night we took turns. He would brush his teeth the same way I brushed mine and we made a counting game out of it. 10 times each side top and bottom and we would count out loud and then I would take the brush and tell him I was feeling around in his mouth with the toothbrush to see if he missed anything and that's how I would make sure his teeth were clean. Good luck. Also, maybe if he heard from a dentist how to clean his teeth that might help. That's where Shaun heard about having to brush top and bottom 10 times each and he listened.

Your son is doing great if he has interest in a toothbrush- I gave my children toothbrushes at 6 months and they love them, but after they do their job I do my job and brush them one last time really good.

21 months is to young to be able to do a super job. I still make sure my 4 year old is doing a good job... my 2 year old is the same. I just say my turn and open your mouth and show me your teeth...

Good luck

This is normal. Probably NOT a sensory issue as earlier post implied. Play a game with him. Have him brush a doll or teddy bear's teeth and show him how to do it. Then let him brush your teeth (with your own toothbrush) and then say it is your turn to brush his. This worked with both my boys and they both went to a pediatric dentist right before turning two. Now they go in for cleaning, xrays, etc. without a fuss and without a tear! Good luck.

The electric toothbrushes work like a charm for this age group :)

get that baby tooth paste that comes with a thimble looking sleeve for your finger and brush his teeth with that.

We let him brush ours while we brush his and we started singing the wheels on the bus all the time from a book he got at school and in this version there is a nurse on the bus says ahh, ahh, ahh, the nurse etc,. Then we started singing that while brushing and he would open up and let us in there. Don't ask me why that worked, I think because he thought was fun, so he didn't feel like he was giving up the control of not doing what I want him to do. Good luck!!

At night before bed, my husband will cradle my daughter and blow on her belly to make her laugh while I go at her teeth with a toothbrush. It's pretty fun for all of us right before her bedtime. During the day, after she eats breakfast I will keep her in her highchair and brush her teeth from behind her. That is more of a fight, but I do what I can! She also likes to help me brush my teeth, and since she sees how I am doing it, she tries to imitate me. Good luck!

I had the same issue with my daughter (she's now 23 months, and I started having this issue soon after I started brushing her teeth). The pediatrician recommended holding her in my lap, with her lying down so her head was upside down. In that position her mouth would open unvoluntarily and I could brush her teeth. It sounds worse than it really is (I'm realizing as I'm typing this that it may sound a little like torture). Also, whenever my husband was around, he'd get his toothbrush, and she would "brush" his teeth while I was brushing hers. She now will usually let me brush her teeth normally. Whenever she gets fussy about me brushing her teeth, I ask her if she wants to do it the easy way (me holding her normally) or the hard way (lying down with her head upside down). She always says the easy way.
Good luck!