2 Year Old Opening Baby-gates and Doors

B.,

It sounds like my house. The door knobs covers work for some but not at my home. I had trouble getting the door open by my 2 year old was able to get them open within 3 minutes of being installed. I have a baby gate that will adjust to several size doors that when you want to remove it you push a button over and then pull it up. I have trouble getting it removed and this is the only thing that have saved us. It has two rubber feet on each side (top and bottom) and if I also want to keep the dogs out of the room I can pull it up high enough to keep them and Emerson out of the room and can climb over if I need too. My six year old niece can climb over it without any problems.

I totally understand!! We had to put cabinet locks on our baby gates to keep ours from opening the gates. The cabinet locks work but now they are now climbing over the gates. We also have to keep one on the refridgerator and pantry doors and have got to figure out something now for the door to the trash can!

Congratulations on your adoptions - we adopted 3 last year and are comtenplating a 4th adoption. These children are such a blessing and we can't imagine our lives without them.

I started putting my daughter in time out at 2 yrs. At first I would have to stay with her and hold her until she understood that she had to stay in one spot. I only put her in for 2 min (I think the recommendation is adding 1 min per year or some such). Or your you take away some favorite toy or some other negative consequence - you would know best. I also did not lock doors or put up baby gates, except for under the kitchen sink (some areas with chemicals you have to lock). I watched a little boy for a while who thought it was fun to put paper and toys in the toilet (he did this at his home). One or two time outs did the trick, he quit.

We had to put the plastic door knob covers on for our daughter. They worked great for her and still allowed others to have access to the off limits rooms. You can get them just about anywhere in the baby or home safety sections.
J.

You've gotten some great suggestions for keeping the littles out of the off-limits areas, but how about making a play room that they could play in without your full attention. They could get into all kinds of dangers if you are allowing them to "play in the house on their own" while your attention is on the olders ones. If one can open doors, they could even be outside before you realize they are missing. Could you dedicate a room to them that provides a safe play area and maybe put a half door on that room. You can cut the regular door off at 3 1/2 feet or so and just close and latch the lower half from the outside. Then they could play unattended and you could still walk past the half door and check in on them.

I don't know what kind of gate you have, but my kids were opening them so I got the kind that screws into the wall and has a latch that you have to kind of pull back and lift at the same time to open. It was not easy to open as it required quite a bit of pressure.

Also there are some "Grip and Twist" door knob covers you can put on the doors that my kids took awhile to figure out, they were about 4 when they could put enough pressure on them to open the door, but easy for the adults and my older daughter to use.

3 possible ideas - 1. Use a regular baby gate that doesn't open if the other children are big enough to climb over it. 2. Use the door knob covers, again if your other kids' hands are big enough to open it 3. Put a hook and eye on the bathroom door - low enogh for the other kids but out of reach for the 2 year old.

B., please forgive my lack of people skills in this response. My intention is absolutely meant to be helpful, not insulting...that said, here is my advice: I have 3 children (girl, age 9; boy age 7: and girl almost 3) and I have NEVER had to install a baby gate or waste money on different products to figure out which worked. Instead of child-proofing your house, try house-proofing your children. If you can train a dog to sit, shake, and roll over, then you can certainly teach a child what they are and are not allowed to do. First, carve out a specific time (which is definitely the hardest part of this task for me) and use this time to set up the scenario that you are trying to avoid. When your child(ren) attempt to open the gate, if you choose to keep the gate, then get down to their level and use your "mom voice" (not a happy sing-song voice) and tell the child "YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED WITHOUT MOMMY! DO NOT OPEN THE GATE!" Do this repeatedly every day for just a few minutes at a time. USE TREATS to encourage. If you are a mom that doesn't use candy (I use M&M's sometimes--one at a time and a bag lasts FOREVER!), you can also use the childs favorite crackers or raisins or strawberries. Reward, reward, reward, with showers of praise when your child walks past the gate without trying to break in. You will only have to put a few days into this before it becomes a habit for your child to seek your approval when avoiding what you want them to avoid. I assure you, this process is very successful in teaching any child over the age of 1 for almost any scenario. If you use corporal punishment (aka spanking) in your home, you can also use a small dowdle-rod to deter unwanted behavior. A small "pop" on the hand or back of the leg to give them a sensory reaction. **I do not mean hard enough to hurt, just enough to associate their negative behavior with a negative response...and a positive response (praise or treat) for the positive behavior. Once the lesson is taught and learned, your job as a mom will be so much less stressful overall.

I saw what Kelly W. wrote and wanted to second that. I have a 25-month-old and a 7-month-old, and the 25-monther has been very good abou not going into our office (where the computer, cat food bowls, and litter box are) because I told him firmly again and again "no go in office." If he went in, I'd tell him no and take him out; if he went in intentionally (you know, when they look directly at you and do something), then I would swat him a couple times, say "no!" and/or put him in his room for a little while. When he'd pause at the door, say "no?" and walk past, I'd tell him "good job!" or "that's right! No go in office!" in a cheerful voice. And now I can trust him with the door open. He also doesn't go into our bedroom because I repeatedly tell him "not without Mommy or Daddy." So it can be done with older kids and without expensive gadgetry. It sounds like you've had your fill of mess and frustration, though, and I sympathize! Good luck!

I'm not sure exactly what type of gates you have, but you could try The First Years Hands Free gate. Even if your 2 year old learns HOW you open this gate, he (hopefully) doesn't weigh enough to do it himself. The gate has a foot pedal that has to be pressed down hard to release the gate. My daughter is 3 1/2 and knows HOW to do it, just doesn't weigh enough yet!

I don't know how old your other kids are, but of course you'd have to make sure they can open these gates. They are the best gates ever! (In my opinion!)

For the door knobs, Safety 1st (and I'm sure other brands) make door knob covers where you either have to squeeze to grip the door knob, or stick your fingers through little holds to grab the door knob. My daughter can't master those yet either!

B.,
DOORLOCKS! Door locks are wonderful things. You can put a hook and eye lock on the doors you want to keep the babies out of that are low enough down the they can't reach but the older children can. You can also get chain locks, those work just as well. It looks tacky, but it cuts down on mess and keeps anyone from swimming in the potty, flushing your cell phone, or decorating the bathroom in toilet paper and toothpaste. My darling soon to be three year old is the master at these games, but not the chain lock that keeps him away from where he doesn't belong, lol. I totally understand your frustration, my son was scaling his child gates at about eighteen months. Then it was getting into everything he could in the bathroom, the refrigerator, etc. I would give the locks a try. They're an effective 'no' and safe when you're distracted.
S.

The only thing I can think of is putting a hook and eye latch high on the outside of the bathroom door, but since you have the older kids, they would just have to get you every time they need to go to the bathroom, which might be a pain. Or depending on how old the older ones are, maybe they could reach the latch but the younger one can't? One caveat: make sure the older kids know there will be severe consequences if they use the latch to lock a sibling IN the bathroom. That is not funny (some kids freak out if locked in a bathroom or small room) and can be dangerous.

Definitely the First Years Hands Free gate. You step on the pedal and push. It is awesome. I also like that you can leave it open if it is just you in the house and want to walk freely in and out if needed. Too heavy for little ones to step on. You can most likely find one on Craigslist.

Must get the doorknob covers that require more pressure to turn. Will be fine for older ones.

Of course, there are newer things on the market now. My son is 23. He could open or climb over baby gates. I installed screen doors with hardware cloth (that tough kind of wire) on the doors that I needed to deny him access to. It worked!