Y.G.
Did you asked him why he feels that thing with the storms??
If you have a psicologyst at his school ask her/him about it. I've got one at my boy school and it's very useful
I have a 10 year old son whose fear of storms seems to be getting worse. For example he saw on the weather forecast that there is a chance of storms on Thursday so he was already upset at bedtime about going to school and worrying about the storms and its only Sunday. We have been dealing with this since he was about 3 or so and kept thinking he would grow out of it. He will also look up the weather on the internet to see what to expect. Anyone have suggestions?
Did you asked him why he feels that thing with the storms??
If you have a psicologyst at his school ask her/him about it. I've got one at my boy school and it's very useful
My 2nd daughter had a lot of fears--storms can be scary even to adults! She always responded well to my taking her fears and anxietys seriously(my parents did not do that with me!) we would go over plans of what to do to be safe. Like, don't use computer when it is storming, stay away from windows etc. We'd listen to the weather and if there is a severe storm or tornado we go to the basement (I keep bottled water and emergency stuff there) If it is not severe i would explain that the weather people will tell us if is something to worry about otherwise it is just natures way of cleaning the air! If you take him seriously but stay calm and matter of fact --he will probably calm down. One time when dd was 13 and her sister was 10 I was at a chiroprctic appt and a big storm started while I was driving home--it was scary! She had listened to the report and when I got there she had taken her sister (and the cat)the basement and they were wrapped in sleeping bags reading stories! I was so proud that she had acted so responsibly! She told me she was scared but remembered what we had planned for, In fact it is good to rehearse what to do in other emergencies too--like what to do if there is a fire or someone smells gas--those types of things.
A couple things that helped me not be scared of storms when I was little. One middle of the night lightning storm, my mom sat up with me and watched out the window. It was really cool to see our normal back yard for just a second in the middle of the night. Get excited about the big flashes of lightning! ("Did you see the swingset?!" "Look next time and see if anyone has the flag up on their mailbox.") Watch the wind blow the trees around, and marvel at how strong and flexible the trees are!
Another time, my dad taught me to tell how far away the lightning was by counting seconds (one mississippi, two mississippi...) between the lightning and the thunder. Every five seconds is another mile. Help your son figure out how many miles away the last lightning struck, then think of something that's that far away. It will help him put some perspective on it. You'll also be able to tell if the worst of the storm is still coming, or if it has past.
By all means pay attention to weather updates, but when the TV news shows the aftermath of a tornado far away from your home, TURN IT OFF! Kids have trouble separating what's on the TV in their family room from what's real next door. Your son doesn't need to see terrible damage that will probably never happen to your home.
Hi T.,
I have the same thing with my 9 almost 10yrold daughter. She to always checks the weater on tv and online. We have talked about why she is afaird and why we need the stroms and that God will wacth over her.It has helped a bit. We have also tried to explain how they come up with the weather and that is not always right. Hope things get better.
M.
I guess my question would be: how do YOU react to storms? Children often reflect parents' feelings on certain things.
When I was growing up, we'd sit together as a family - including the dog - on the front porch, in aluminum lawnchairs, under a steel awning! Sprinkles to storms. We would regularly discuss tornado plans during tornado season - where to go in the basement, and who was going to grab flashlights, candles, blankets, and the dog. I never had any anxiety, and neither did my sister...or my dog :) If you have pets, maybe that's the route you need to take - storms will be upsetting to dog/cat, so we have to act decisively and calmly so that the pet doesn't get so upset. Good luck!
T., it is time to face the issue and know that there is a problem. Professional help is needed to really help your child, for this is something he can't solve on his own, and I know that you are truly concerned. I have 4 sons and 1 daughter, all grown now, and have never faced this problem, so just know that I'll be praying for you and your son that there will be peace in his mind and know that God can calm his fears! P.
He sounds like my son. He is now thirteen and is finally more comfortable with storms. We tried counseling and i don't really think that helped. he used to literally shake and cover his ears and hide under a pillow. Now he is just mildly uncomfortable when it storms. I really think your son will grow out of it. My son also checked the weather everyday and would worry if a storm was coming. Be patient, I'm 37 and still afraid of the dark sometimes.
I know just how you feel. My daughter would physcially get sick if she even heard the word tornado. She is now 18 and still gets a stomachache. All I can say is hold him close and let him know that you are there.
Have you and/or your son experienced weather-related catastrophes (floods, tornadoes, etc.)? My mom was a constant "weather watcher" when we were growing up, most likely due to the fact that her father was like that, and she actually lived through a tornado when she was a little girl. I think watching her being anxious rubbed off on me a bit because I notice I have difficulty during bad storms sometimes. We also had a tornado-like situation when I was a little girl, so I'm sure that's part of it, too. I've grown out of the anxiety a bit and don't watch the weather so much anymore, and I think it's partly due to the fact that I have other worries right now (a 2-year-old son, for example). We have a basement, so I remind myself that we have a safe place to go to if need be. Also, I think about how good for the plants the rain will be. My husband reminds me too of how high up on a hill we live, so flooding shouldn't be an issue. I think talking with your son and asking him about his specific fears ("Are you afraid of tornadoes, or flooding, or something else?" "Are you afraid that we might not be safe, that we might get hurt?") might help. Reminding him that he is safe with caring adults around and when he's inside your home during storms might help. Also, if you find out what he's specifically afraid of, it might be good to research it on-line and find out where that particular weather ordinarily occurs and if it's something you truly need to be concerned about. Someone else mentioned turning off the TV when weather-related catastrophes are on the news, which might be a good idea, too, unless you can help your son understand that not ALL types of weather happen everywhere (hurricanes occur more along coastlines and on islands, for example). It's such a difficult anxiety to overcome because weather is such an unpredictable and unpreventable thing, something we have no control over. It's hard for children (and some adults, like me) when they feel they don't have control over something and fear the unknown. I think talking with him and letting him know that you're aware of his concerns will help. If it's something that you think will interfere with other aspects of his life (like eating, sleeping, and school), then you might think about getting him professional counseling. My parents ended up getting a weather alert system for their home, which I think was the WRONG thing to do for my mom, especially since they have a grandson living with them right now. It goes off every time there's a storm alert somewhere, even if it's no where near their area. Not only is it annoying, but it just plays on my mother's fear of bad weather and could possibly be helping to develop that anxiety in my nephew. Just a little tip if you were thinking about doing something like that! Good luck, and hope I've helped a little.
My 8 year old gets a little upset when the storms are during the night. When it happens, we just tell her how nice the next day will be because of all the rain all the flowers will grow and all the animals will get water to drink (we have woods behind us) and this seems to work. My husband has even told our 6 year old when we have thunder and lightening that the animals are getting a "fourth of July" celebration in the sky and she loved that! Hope this helps!
There are several books about storms. There is even a huge coffee table book about them...some on tornados, hurricanes, etc. I think he needs to understand that you DONT stress out about things you have no control over. If you can do something about it....then that's all you can do. He CANT get freaked out over the reactions of others (something he doesn't have control over). Sounds like some insecurity issues possibly, too.
If he understands HOW storms happen & that they are a part of nature, he may become intrieged in a different way. These books show MANY MANY people walking around and SURVIVING. Have you talked about WHY he is so fearful?
I have a daughter who has a fear of them, too. When she hears "storm" "tornado", etc. on the TV, EVEN IF it's no where close, she begins to fret. We THEN ask her to look at the sky (clear sky doesn't indicate a tornado, etc.) so she makes the connections with what it takes for these things to happen.
If there IS a storm........we pray. That seems to work for her!